Satchel Full of Truths
by TWISTEDART
Summary: Summary: Takes Place after Last Train to the Fair. Last Episode of Season One. All Barkleys will be in this. Main focus is Heath Barkley and Audra Barkley
1. Chapter 1

**Summary:** I've only watched season 1 of The Big Valley before I got this idea. Now, I've watched episodes of the other seasons, this idea would never work. Any way, I happened to be cleaning house and the television was blaring Western Marathons on this particular Sunday. I started to turn off the tv and go about my business when behold, I caught the Bionic Man in his early years!( WOWZA! That man is gorgeous and reminds me of a blonde Elvis Presley.) I was a child when I watched Bionic Man with my dad. So I was intrigued and sat down. To make a long story short, I fell hopelessly in love with Heath Barkley and the other Barkleys. I binge watched season one of The Big Valley in a week's time. Being an avid fanfic writer, I thought before I get into any more seasons, I didn't want to ruin any of my thoughts before I wrote this one out.

 **Warning** : I think Linda Evans and Lee Majors were probably two of the most gorgeous people to live in that era. (; So here is the deal, this will be a story of the two and their unusual relationship in their family dynamics. Before every one gets all squeamish, it will not be incest at all. (YUCK! I'm not sick in the head) But it will be my own little imagination of these two gorgeous beings without ruining any Barkley. Because I am admittedly superficial and gorgeous people play out gorgeously in stories. So come along for the ride and hold on to the reigns. I wouldn't want you to fall off before you let this one play out. Because it involves Heath and Audra, I must make this after season one and no other seasons must be considered. Because the idea of their dynamic in this just won't work after season one. But one season isn't too far fetched for my story. It will be immediately after the last episode of season one _The Last Train to the Fair_

 **Disclaimer** : I don't own the characters nor would I want to. Just having a little fun with my imagination and hope to let others enjoy my take on a story some may enjoy.

 **Rated** T to be safe.

 _Title: The Satchel Full of Truths_

 _Chapter One: Coddled Little Girl_

Audra leaned back against the large comfortable couch, which her mother insisted she not remove herself from. If it were up to the family, Audra would still be in bed not daring to come down stairs. It had been a long two and half weeks since she had her surgery for her appendix removal. Audra had to agree that her surgery was done in less than stellar conditions. However, the doctor from the hospital had released her to come back to the Barkley Ranch just a few days after. Yet, her mother and her brothers seemed to be treating her like an invalid by making her remain stationary. Well, two of her brothers were. One was away to college and one didn't seem to have time to baby Audra like Nick and Jarod were. No, Heath Barkley came in sweaty after working hard all day and rarely gave Audra two words. He didn't even take time to play cards with her. That fact Audra resented very immensely. After all, she was stuck on a sofa bored out of her mind. The least her brother could do was play a game of cards with her.

The others were still enough on their own treating her like a porcelain doll. She would much prefer being ignored as Heath was doing than being treated as such by her mother and her brothers, Nick and Jarod. Audra had finally begged them to allow her to come downstairs instead of being held up in her bedroom. The fact still remained that she was bored out of her mind. She only wished they'd leave to Stockton long enough to allow her the pleasure of sneaking out for a horse ride around North ridge.

Her thoughts of how to escape soon were erased with the loud bustle coming into the house. Audra smiled as she heard Heath taunting Nick over something. Jared winked at his little sister. Both knew it was Heath who had started the little argument. He always made tiny off hand remarks to watch Nick steam under the collar. After almost a year of having Heath as their brother, Nick had still not realized Heath was having a little innocent fun at Nick's expense. However, as far as Audra, her mother, and Jarod were concerned, it was all good fun. Besides, Nick always gave back as much as he got from his younger brother. Her mother, Victoria, had said to Audra and Jarod that Heath seemed to be most like Nick. Although, Heath was more level headed and had more of a sadness that sometimes surrounded his demeanor that the other Barkley's could never have.

Audra pulled back her long blonde locks as each family member greeted her with a kiss to the forehead as they declared they were at her beck and call now that their ranching, lawyering, or other things were over for the day. Except for Heath, who walked passed her to pour himself a drink. Audra didn't want to be coddled. However, it would be nice if Heath at least nodded his head her way. She had no idea why he was ignoring her as he was. She had done nothing to that stubborn brother of hers. It was times like these that Audra had to remind herself that Heath was indeed her brother and not some drifter. Audra, as well as the rest of the family, had accepted Heath with open arms despite his mother's past with her father. Accepting him with open arms and feeling like he was her brother were two different things though. He called her "sis" and he was very protective over her. Still sometimes in Audra's thoughts, she couldn't help but feel Heath was still a stranger, who she barely knew. Those thoughts were bombarding her mind a lot since being ignored by him the past two and half weeks. She didn't understand why he chose to act like she no longer existed.

"This is ridiculous!" Audra spoke up in irritation.

Haughtily, she straightened her shoulders back to make sure her family knew she meant business. Of course, she meant Heath acting like she didn't exist. She realized her outburst had made all the Barkley's turn to stare at her. At least, she got Heath to notice she was still alive. Audra's eyes found Heath's. She watched as he swallowed then turned from her quickly. She felt her lip begin to quiver at his rejection. Therefore, to save her pride, she spoke up about the other matter that was bothering her.

"I'm tired of sitting around all day. I want to go shopping, riding...anything but sit on this couch or head to bed!" Audra smacked the sides of the sofa angrily.

It was this very moment that Heath spoke up causing the other Barkley's to stare at him as if he had a third eye. "Then get up and go riding or shopping."

Heath half chuckled at Victoria, Nick, and Jarod staring at him with the same look and posture. Each had their arms folded defiantly over their chests with squinted eyes staring at Heath.

Victoria spoke up first. "Heath, how could you say that? She almost died!"

"But she's here alive and well now, Mother. Which like you all, I'm grateful. But I'd go stir crazy if I were stuck in the house all day like ya'll have her doing." Heath poured another drink and swigged it down quickly. "Just sayin'"

"That doesn't count." Nick's voice was too loud for the occasion as usual. "You also took a beating in a prison camp or Mexican jail...whatever, else you've had to deal with..any way, you were out the next day helping on the ranch. She's NOT YOU!"

"No, I'm not." Audra smiled quirkily thinking of how many times Heath had endured life threatening things but would never be confined to couch. "But I'm not asking to run the ranch, break a bronco, or have a shoot out. I just want to go for a ride on North ridge."

"Boy howdy, Sis." Heath sat his drinking glass on the small table. "I wondered when you'd finally get tired of all the fuss and being a coddled little girl."

"Thank you, Heath." Audra turned to Victoria. "Mother, please. I need to get out of the house and not just to sit on the porch. I feel like I'm smothering."

Victoria sat down beside her daughter. "I'm sorry, Darling. I guess we have been a little over protective."

"A little?" Heath said sarcastically but quickly shut up seeing as the glares were once again piercing him.

"I understand, Mother. " Trying to save Heath from her mother's and brothers' wrathful stares, Audra smiled sweetly as she glanced at each of her brothers and mother. "I know it is because you care. But I'm better now. I promise."

"Fine." Jarod leaned down to kiss his sister's cheek. "You should go riding tomorrow. But take Heath with you, since he agrees with you, just to be safe."

"Heath, will you?" Audra's eyes begged him as they sparkled with slight excitement to be getting away from the Barkley house and being fussed over.

"Sure. I'll go. I'll saddle the horses first thing in the morning." Heath teased with a wink. "It's not like I work all day herding cattle or mending fences."

 _End Chapter One_

 **Read and Review. I can take good or bad reviews. I just can't take silence. (;**


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter Two: The Feeling of a Cool Breeze, Drinking a Cold Beer, and the Soft Touch of a Woman_

Audra lifted her face towards the warm sun. As the sun kissed her cheeks, she sighed contentedly.

"Boy howdy. You did miss riding. Didn't you?" Heath stated as he pulled his horse up beside hers. "I should've came to your rescue sooner. But I thought you were enjoying the attention."

Audra's eyes snapped open at Heath's words. "Hardly. You don't know me that well at all."

"What do you mean?" Heath pushed back his hat before wiping the sweat from his brow.

"I don't like all the fuss they've been making over me. I'm not like that. Sure, I admit I like attention at times. But I don't like being treated like a helpless female."Audra raked her fingers across her mare's mane before glancing back up at Heath. "Why haven't you spoke to me since the appendicitis attack, Heath?"

"Oh. You noticed." Heath stated before dismounting his horse. His voice came out soft in a slight whisper. "I guess its because I don't really know you."

Audra watched curiously as Heath lead his horse to the large tree that was shading the trail. She began to dismount her own horse but was quickly aided by Heath helping her down. She giggled at his quickness to help her. Audra and Heath tied their horses to the tree before Heath spread out a blanket to sit on under the tree.

"What do you mean?" Audra finally asked. "That's why you are ignoring me because you don't really know me that well. We've lived under the same roof, ate dinners together and a lot more for a little under a year. That makes little to no sense, Heath Barkley."

"I supposin' it don't." Heath chuckled at his own words. "I can't exactly know someone very well I'm not interacting with I guess."

"No. You can't." Audra leaned back on her elbows. She glanced at the leaves in the trees dancing in the wind.

"I never talked to you on the train the day of your surgery either, Audra." Heath spread out his long, muscular legs to be in a lying position. He was propped on one elbow as he pulled a piece of weed to chew on. "Did you know that?"

"No. I guess I was very sick." Audra raked her hand down her riding pants. "Why? Why didn't you talk to me?"

"Because I was thinking how sick you were. I was thinkin' that you needed to talk to your brothers." Heath glanced at Audra. "I know that includes me. But at that very moment, on that train, I didn't feel like family. I felt like an outsider. I can't explain it."

"Did Nick or Jarod... did they make you feel this way? Or I?" Audra's eyes begged for forgiveness if she had made Heath feel any thing but welcome.

"No." Heath shook his head back and forth gently. "They were sharing stories with you to keep your thoughts off your pain. I had no stories of us to share. It was just as it was. Nothin' made me feel that way. I just did. Don't get me wrong. I was worried. I cared." Heath paused slightly before adding. "I care. But I didn't feel it was my right to try to be the brothers they were at the time." Heath watched as Audra's brow knitted together showing she wasn't quite sure what he was saying. "I've had one person in my life who I was worried about that much when I saw them sick. That was my mother. I knew how I felt about spending every second with her I could at that time. I didn't want to steal that from your brothers. Then after that, I ignored you because I felt bad for maybe not caring enough as they did. Do you understand?"

"I do." Audra shook her head. "You don't quite think of me as a sister yet."

"I'm sorry, Sis. I do but not like they do. I mean to say that I am tryin' this whole family thing." Removing his cowboy hat, Heath laid all the way back. He folded his arms under his head as he spoke. "For the most part, I'm really feeling a part of the family. I enjoy being a Barkley. Nick and Jarod are easy to think of as brothers. Especially, Nick because I'm with him all the time. Then there is Mother. I feel like she truly has plugged up that empty spot in my heart for my own mother. Jarod and Eugene immediately were ready to believe my story after I told it. But you...I don't know how to explain it, Audra."

"I was coming on to you in a motel room to prove you weren't my brother." Audra added as she settled back to lie adjacent Heath. "I think Jarod and Mother were convinced from the very start. Eugene follows whatever Nick thinks. And I...I just wanted to prove you a liar."

"That. And the fact that when I pulled you off the horse by Tom Barkley's grave, I thought you the prettiest girl I'd ever seen." Heath chuckled as his face turned slightly red. "Not something a man should've thought about his own sister."

"You and I didn't know." Audra insisted as se stared up again at the leaves blowing in the wind. "But it's been almost a year, Heath. A lot has changed from that time. We just need to spend more time together getting to know one another."

"I suppose it wouldn't hurt." Heath sighed.

"Okay. Let me start. Name three things you think I really enjoy." Audra glanced at Heath waiting for his answers. "And three things you think I despise."

"You love shopping for dresses, riding your horse and helping orphans." Heath watched as he saw Audra smiling broadly at his answers. "You despise the smell of sweaty cattlemen, being confined in a house, and someone stepping on the flowers around Tom Barkley's grave."

Audra laughed as she playfully swatted at Heath's shoulder. "It is true. I guess you know me better than I thought. How did you know I hate the smell of the sweaty cattlemen?"

"I see your nose squish up when Nick and I walk into the room after a long cattle run." Heath explained.

"My turn. You like...ummmmm..." Audra frowned as she tried to think. "Ummmmm. You enjoy..."

"It's okay." Heath stood up. He reached out his hand to help Audra up. "I better get you back before Jarod sends a posse after us."

Heath gently helped Audra on her horse before mounting his own horse. Audra bit her lip as she sighed.

"Tell me the answers, Heath." Audra requested in a soft voice. "We are getting to know one another."

Heath shrugged as he blurted out. "I like feeling a cool breeze when I've been in the hot sun all day. I like drinking a cold beer after a hard day's work. I enjoy the soft touch of a woman." The last words came out of his mouth without him thinking. He glanced over at Audra to gage her reaction. He noticed her bright red cheeks. "Sorry, Audra. That came out without me meaning it to."

Audra quickly recovered from her embarrassment. "I know you despise not having a last name of your own, men disrespecting women...and embarrassing yourself in front of a lady with too much information." She taunted Heath.

"I do believe you know me more than you thought, Ms. Barkley." Heath smiled as he kicked his horse slightly to pick up pace.

"I do believe you are correct, Mr. Barkley." Audra followed suit as they both headed back towards the Barkley house.

 _End of Chapter Two_ ~ _To be continued_

 **Note: Thanks for the review. This story has a long way to go to get to the heart of it.**


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter Three: A Barkley or a Glorified Ranch Hand_

Audra sat trying to read a book in the living room. Her reading kept getting interrupted by her thoughts. She kept thinking about Heath and her earlier conversation. He really didn't feel like she was his sister. Although they had enjoyed a short talk, she had began to think about Heath feeling out of place on the train that day. She wondered why he felt like he didn't belong and wasn't family at that moment. Her thoughts were soon interrupted by the loud, boisterous Nick Barkley. Jarod was telling his mother about some interesting story that had happened at the law office earlier that day. They both stopped at Nick's intrusion of the peace.

"Well, I see you got back here in one piece." Nick grunted as he threw his hat on the table. "I hope you got your fill of riding the North ridge for the day. Because I need Heath back out on the ranch and not being your personal care taker."

"Hold on a minute, Nick." Audra crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. "If I recall, it was Jarod who insisted Heath go with me. Therefore, if you have any qualms about Heath not working the ranch, take that up with Jarod. Besides, Heath already deserted me to go back to whatever the ranch needs. I swear you work him like a dog."

"Now what a minute, little sister." Nick's voice raised an octave or two. "I work just as hard as Heath Barkley."

"Really?" Audra raised an eyebrow. She glanced over at Jarod and her mother before waltzing to touch the hearth of the fireplace. "I beg to differ. I've heard you order Heath to do this and to do that quite often rather than do it yourself."

"Excuse me!" Nick was now speaking in a very loud voice. "I don't know where you are going with this but Heath is still new to this ranch. I've worked it for years. He has to earn his due just like the rest of us Barkleys."

Jarod settled down with a drink in his hand. It was always interesting to hear Nick argue over something especially when he was arguing with another Barkley. His stubborn streak reminded him of his father. However, his father usually was on the correct end of the equation where Nick often times was arguing for arguments sake.

"Isn't that right, Mother?" Nick smirked expecting an agreement from her.

Before Victoria could answer, Audra added to the conversation. "We all have had the blessings of this ranch. He's been denied that. It's not fair to compare it. I've been thinking..."

"Now, it is getting dangerous." Teasingly adding to the conversation, Heath walked in just in time to hear only Audra's words. "You thinkin' and all."

"That isn't funny!" Audra was now speaking loudly. "I was taking up for you."

"I didn't realize I needed takin' up for." Heath shrugged as he glanced at the others in confusion.

"It seems our little sister feels you work harder than me." Nick squared back his shoulders practically daring Heath to speak up in agreement of Audra.

"I don't know where you're gettin' your information, Audra." Heath winked at Audra before adding. "But I earn my keep by working OUR ranch."

It wasn't missed by any of the Barkley's how Heath made sure to exaggerate the word "our". He was letting them all know that he felt the land was his to work as much as theirs.

"I just don't like it." Audra's lip quivered slightly. She had been mulling over the fact that Heath didn't see her as a sister. She wasn't sure if she saw him as a brother either now that he had admitted it. That truly bothered her. She had began to care for Heath just as he admitted caring for her. But Nick, Jarod, and Eugene were so much dearer to her heart. "I want you to be treated like a Barkley and not a glorified ranch hand."

Before anyone could try to calm Audra down, she ran out of the room and up the stairs crying.

"Well, where in the world did that come from?" Nick lowered his voice at seeing his sister so upset. "Did you say something to her about me working you too hard? Do you see yourself as a ranch hand?"

"No." Heath poured himself a drink. He swigged it back and answered. "On both questions. We never talked about the ranch or working it."

"What did you talk about, Heath?" Victoria stood up because she planned to go calm Audra down.

"Nothing much." Heath rubbed the temple of his head. "We just made small talk. Look, I'm sorry she got some mixed up notion in that pretty head of hers, but I didn't put it there. Now if ya'll don't mind. I've got a lot more work to do today."

Heath marched out as the other Barkley's watched him leave. Jarod glanced at his mother and winked. "Well, Nick. If you both work the same amount of labor, why is it that our little brother is still working and you're in here relaxing?"

Nick cleared his throat. "Ummmm. I was just stopping to find out if Heath made it back. I'm heading back out." With those words, Nick left to help Heath work.

"I better go talk to your sister about her mixed up notion." Victoria chuckled at Heath's choice of words as well as Nick's flustered reply to Jarod. Those sons of hers did like to taunt each other.

Jarod held up his finger to add. "You mean the mixed up notion in that pretty head of hers."

Victoria grinned as she turned to head upstairs. She couldn't help but smile at how much Heath had added to their family. He was a lot like Tom in many ways. In other ways, she was sure he must be like his own mother. Heath was much quiter than Tom. Tom was louder like Nick. However, Tom thought before he spoke much like Heath. Victoria often thought of Heath's silence as more of his past than his personality had he been raised differently. She often wondered what an illegitimate son of a married man would be treated like. Was Heath scolding by others or even abused if he talked up or was he genuinely a quiet person similar to how his own mother may have been?

Victoria knocked lightly on Audra's door before entering. She found her daughter laying face down on the bed sobbing. Victoria sat on the side of the bed before touching her daughter's shoulder. "Calm down, Darling. What has you so upset? Heath said he wasn't feeling like a ranch hand. He is a Barkley. He knows this."

Audra's sobbing became louder. "He thinks of all of you as family but me. He admitted as much on our ride." She wailed out. "I thought it was how Nick orders him around that maybe he didn't feel like family as we thought he did."

"Oh, Audra." Victoria pulled Audra up to hold her in her arms. "Nick orders Eugene around like that too. That's his personality. Heath is his little brother. Nick treats him as such. Your brothers adore Heath. Heath adores them as well. The fact is that I adore Heath too. As far as I'm concerned, he is my son."

"Mother, I adore Heath too. But the ride today, it made me realize that deep down, I don't think of Heath as a brother. Not yet. Why is that? Heath doesn't think of me as his little sister either. We care for one another but we don't have that connection he has with you or the boys. Sure he protects me like a brother should. I've been thinking that may be because he protects women in general not because he feels as a protective brother. What am I doing wrong to cause this? I don't want to make him feel alienated by me." Audra begged for answers.

"I think it will come in time. Unlike the rest of us, you and Eugene aren't around Heath like we are. The boys spend a lot of time with him. I do as well. I also see Tom Barkley in him probably more than most of us here. There are times when he shows stubbornness and compassion that I see the same look I saw in your father's eyes. He has very similar to features of Tom when I met Tom as a young girl. Sometimes, I see Heath and swear that Tom Barkley is standing there. That is why he was easy to accept as Tom's son. Not to mention, you and Heath aren't exactly in the same circle of interests. Heath feels we are family. I'm sure of that. He's very proud to be a Barkley. I'm very proud to call him a Barkley too." Victoria dried Audra's tears with a handkerchief from the wrist band of her blouse. "Please don't worry about Heath, Audra. I promise you that we all adore and love him so very much."

"Thank you, Mother." Audra sighed as she sat up straighter. "I want this family to be something special because he never got to know father as we did. He seemed so broken at times. As strong as he acts, he seems so broken at times."

Victoria knew exactly what Audra meant by broken. She had seen Heath staring off as if he were alone in the world. Heath had lived such a different life than what her own children had lived. He knew more tragedy than all of them. He'd lived a rough life as well as experienced more than even her oldest son, Jarod, had. No matter how much he was welcomed into the Barkley home as a Barkley, Heath would still have his past. That past was tainted with a lot of bad. Like Audra, Victoria hoped that the Barkleys could make the future outshine the pains of the past.

"I think I'll go make Heath a nice lunch to thank him for taking me riding this morning." Audra perked up at the thought of spending a lunch with Heath. "He rarely comes in to eat lunch like Nick does. I know he loves that ham you made last night. I'll just make him a sandwich with some of my prize winning pickles. Do you think he'd like that, Mother?"

"I'm sure he will." Victoria chuckled at Audra's change in demeanor. Such a little thing as a lunch with Heath caused the girl to turn from tears to smiles.

 _End of Chapter Three~To Be cont._


	4. Chapter 4

_Chapter 4: Meeting Dear Aunt Rose_

Heath was his usual quiet self while Nick dominated the conversation. Audra loved hearing her older brother's booming voice most of the time. However, today she had longed to speak to Heath and get to know him better.

Heath chomped on a pickle as he stared out over the field. He was propped up on the fence that was being mended when Audra showed up to serve him lunch. Nick grabbed up some of the lunch claiming he got first dibs because he was the oldest sibling present. Heath smiled his quirky smile before glancing at this woman, who he was supposed to get to know as a sister. She sure was a pretty sight. Heath had to admit that. Audra was the most beautiful woman for a man to have the pleasure of looking at. Heath supposed that Victoria Barkley must have looked a lot like Audra. Perhaps, her coloring was different as they referred to her hair in her youth as being a dark chestnut color . But the same fairness still resided on Victoria Barkley's face. Yep. He supposed his sister and his father's wife were probably the most beautiful women to grace God's green earth. That seemed like a problem brewing for any son and brother. After all, it was now his job to be their protectors as much as his older brothers' duty.

Nick continued talking about some of the herd as Heath continued to be silent. Audra would add a few words when she could get a word in edge wise. The lunch was turning out a pleasant adventure before it was interrupted by one of the men riding up.

"Something wrong, Dunigan?" Heath asked in a monotone voice as he glanced at the ranch hand.

"Your mother sent me for you all. It seems there is a visitor at the ranch house." Dunigan wiped his brow. Then he continued. "Mrs. Barkley said to make sure that Nick knows it is important and the ranch work can wait so not to leave Heath working alone."

Nick grunted out as he stood up from the ground. "Why do all the women in this family think I work Heath harder than most?"

Dunigan glanced at Heath then shrugged. He added nonchalantly. "Heath does work mighty hard."

"I work mighty hard too!" Nick's voice boomed loudly.

"We all work mighty hard." Heath pushed off the fence before helping Audra on to her horse. "Best be gettin' to the house. Mother doesn't like to be kept waitin'."

Audra loved company. At times, it was dull living on a ranch with few occasions for parties, dinners or meeting new people. Therefore, when she saw the buggy parked along the stables, she wanted to squeal with excitement. Heath noted his sister's enthusiastic smile as well as his brother's grin at seeing the buggy. Heath was very different from the two in that aspect. He didn't take kindly to strangers. Mostly because in his life, strangers didn't treat him too kindly. Being what he was, a illegitimate born son, he was used to strangers mistreatment for nothing more than him being alive. No. Heath didn't take to strangers at all. Because of this, Heath offered to help stable the horses while Nick and Audra hurriedly headed to the house.

Nick burst through the door followed closely behind by Audra. Once again, his voice echoed through the house. "MOTHER! JAROD! WHERE'S EVERYBODY AT!"

Victoria shook her head with a roll of her eyes. "Nicholas! Can you please not shatter a chandelier?" Victoria inserted her arm into the crook of Nick's elbow. She glanced back at Audra. "Eugene is home and has brought with him the most wonderful of surprises."

"Oh, Mother, what is it?" Audra ran up to link her arm into the crook of Nick's other arm.

"Where's Heath? I specifically asked for him to come along." Victoria asked as she glanced back toward the front entrance.

"He's putting the horses up, Mother." Nick stated as he held up his hand. "He volunteered."

"Of course." Victoria grinned knowing Heath's propensity of not to like meeting strangers.

When the door opened to the study, it was Audra, who was the loud one this time. She screamed loudly. "Aunt Rose!"

Nick laughed loudly as he walked up to embrace his aunt. "Aunt Rose Barkley! It has been too long."

"It indeed has." Rose Barkley smiled at her nephew as she pulled him back to look at him. "My you and Jarod both look like your mother and father squashed into one." She turned to Audra. "You'll always have the beauty of your mother, little Audra. Though you're not so little now. As I told Eugene, you all have grown up on your old Aunt Rose."

Jarod offered his aunt a drink of sherry as she settled to stare at her niece and nephews. "It has been far too long, Aunt Rose."

The older woman chuckled as she drew in a deep breath. She looked nothing like her brothers, Thomas and James. She was short and robust. Her hair was a red hue that made her pale skin even paler. Freckles still danced on her face as they did in her youth. Only now the freckles were mingled with wrinkles and age spots. She was never married but seemed happy not to be tied down to a husband. She adored being an aunt to the Barkley children, which was enough a pleasure for her. She visited rarely but when she did, it was always a wonderful visit filled with stories of family. The last time she visited was three years ago to check upon the family. She had come three years before that to her younger brother's funeral. She had stayed for a extended visit that time to help the family grieve Thomas Barkley's passing.

Jarod glanced at his mother. He knew his mother had not written to Rose about Heath. How did someone tell of an illegitimate son born of a brother, who Rose adored as the rest of the family did? Victoria took a deep breath before taking Rose's hands into hers.

"I need to tell you something, Rose." Victoria had planned on Heath being there for introductions. However, this may be a better way to prepare Tom's older sister with the news of a new Barkley child.

"Do tell." Rose could see the worry etched on Victoria's face. "Is it bad news, Deary?"

"No. Actually, it is wonderful news." Victoria smiled cheerfully. It was easy to think of Heath as a special added blessing to the family.

Before Victoria began to explain, Heath walked through the study doors. He smiled quietly. "I was wonderin' where ya'll were."

Rose's eyes widened as she stepped backwards. She began to sway as she placed her hand over her heart. "Dear Lord...Dear Lord."

Nick and Jarod both grabbed the older woman to help her sit down. Her eyes still wide as she whispered. "Am I seeing a ghost?"

"No. Rose. This is the blessing I was going to tell you about." Victoria touched her sister in law's shoulder. "This is..."

Rose whispered as her voice strained against her throat. "He looks like my dear brother in his youth as well as looks more like Tom than the whole lot of Tom's children. He could be my own father's twin. This is Heath, Tom's son."

 _End of Chapter Four. To be continued..._

 **Note: Thanks for the reviews. Sorry for the delay in updating. It is a very busy month.**


	5. Chapter 5

_Chapter Five: A Satchel Full of Truths_

Victoria's and Jarod's eyes caught one another's at Aunt Rose's words. How did she know of Heath? There was no way the news spread across country about the newest Barkley. They glanced back to Rose, who was still clutching her chest. The woman was visibly shaken at seeing Heath. Her hands tried to steady themselves as Nick and Eugene tried to aide her. Audra had raced to get a wet rag to place on her aunt's forehead.

"You know who I am." Heath questioned as he stepped up closer to the robust lady. "May I ask who you are?"

"Bring my satchel." Rose's eyes glistened as she looked at the young man, who was an exact copy of her own father in his youth. She reached to touch Heath's face. She raked her hand slowly over Heath's cheek. This caused Heath an uncomforting feeling due to the lack of knowing the woman. He figured out that she had to be his father's sister. He had heard about her. The Barkley family seemed to care deeply for this woman. However, Heath was used to being slapped by such women as a child. He swallowed something hitched in his throat. He suddenly had an eerie feeling come over him as the woman's face seemed to bring back a distant member.

"You look like my father. You look a lot like Tom too but so much like my own father. That would be your grandfather. His name was Robert James Barkley." Rose sensed the boy before her was felling bewildered. She couldn't really blame him. She was in quiet a shock as well.

Silas had placed Rose Barkley's satchel in the guest room when she first arrived. The satchel went everywhere with her. It was a known fact to the rest of the Barkleys that Rose treasured the old satchel. She had often called it a whole satchel full of truths about her life. At her request, Silas had went to retrieve the satchel and soon had it placed by Aunt Rose Barkley's feet.

"Here's you go, Miz Rose Barkley." Silas smiled. "Can's I get you a lemonade or some water?"

"No. No. That won't be necessary. I appreciate the offer." Rose's voice still was weak from the shock of seeing Heath. "Please. Sit." Eyeing Heath, Rose patted the seat next to her. "I have a lot to tell you and Victoria."

Silas shook his head kindly before excusing himself to make dinner. Heath sat down feeling rather awkward being the center of Rose's attention.

Rose glanced up at Victoria. She had hoped the story she had to tell didn't come as a betrayal to her beloved sister in law. "You should sit too, Victoria. Please."

Victoria allowed Jarod to help her sit in the chair adjacent Rose. Nick, Jarod, Eugene, and Audra stood making a semi circle around the seated Rose, Heath and Victoria. Heath shifted uneasy as memories haunted him of being surrounded when a child. He had often been kicked and prodded by other children, who taunted him with the name bastard over and over. He wondered why those memories haunted him at the moment. After all, he had lived that life and it was nothing out of the ordinary for his childhood. Those memories were long past as new ones had slowly began to take those away.

Rose picked up the satchel and fumbled through it. "I know it's in here." She looked up with a faint smile.

"How did you know Heath's name?" Victoria swallowed the lump which had formed in her throat. She wasn't going to hide anything from Heath or her other children. IF Tom Barkley had known about Heath, they all should know. IF he had known about Heath, all that Victoria Barkley thought of her husband would be a lie.

"I'll get to that." Rose patted Victoria's hand before going back to search her satchel. "One step at a time. I got to show this to you all. It is such a strange likeness."

The family waited patiently with only Nick speaking up. "Well. What are you looking for?" His voice boomed showing his impatience.

Rose chuckled a nervous chuckle at Nick's outburst. He was so much like her little brother at times. "Here it is."

Rose held up a very old photo of Tom. Audra stated without thinking. "Where did you get that picture of Heath?"

"Look closer, my little Audra." She handed the photo to Audra. Nick, Eugene, and Jarod glanced at the photo as Audra held it. "That's your father only a few months before he met your mother. He was twenty years old. I insisted he take a photo for before he headed out to God know's where."

"It sure looks enough like Heath." Eugene had almost an edge of jealousy to him. After all, before Heath, he was the son who was told looked most like Tom Barkley. However, that jealousy was short lived when Eugene remembered he had his father where Heath had not. "But I see there is a little difference."

"Yeah." Nick belted. "But Heath looks more like father than any of us."

Audra handed the photo to her mother. "Look, Mother. Do you remember father looking as such?"

Victoria ran her finger over the photo with such emotion. She felt a teasing of a tear trying to escape her eyes. "I do indeed. Oh, he was so handsome the first I laid eyes on him." She smiled up at Heath. "I guess when I saw you that is how I knew it was true. I knew that you were his son. It wasn't that big a leap at seeing you. I didn't think Tom would betray our marriage. However, I knew that you looked to similar to the man I had laid eyes upon in my youth. You have some of your mama in there I'm sure to make the difference."

"Well. I'm not sure about that." Rose hoped that didn't offend Heath. "Here is the other photo. It is very warn. It was taken when photos were first being made. It was a rare thing to have a photo then."

Heath took the photo in his shaky hand. He stared at it as wonderment filled him. It was as if he were looking in a mirror of the future. The man that stared back looked like him with about twenty more years of age. He handed the photo to his mother allowing her to pass it to the others. All were amazed at the likeness of Heath to his grandfather. It was already astounding how much Heath looked like Tom. However, this was an uncanny resemblance. If there was ever doubt of Heath's parentage, that doubt dissipated at the two photos of the Barkley men. One of his father and one of his grandfather. Each photo told of Heath's looks coming from the Barkley side of his family.

He took in a shallow breath of air before he spoke in a slow manner. "Ma'am."

"Call me Aunt Rose." Rose squeezed the boy's hand. She couldn't help but still be taken aback at Heath's existence.

"Aunt Rose." Heath stated unsure of himself. "This still don't explain how you knew my name."

Heath hoped beyond hope that he was wrong in his assumption. He had long put away his hate for Tom Barkley after reading his letter to his mother. However, if Tom knew of him, the hate would return. Heath feared that more than anything at the moment. Victoria sensed Heath's pain. Therefore, she reached to touch the man she had began to think of her own.

Victoria bit her lip before adding. "Please, Rose. We must know."

"I guessed you might after my slip of tongue." Rose admitted as she patted Heath's thigh. "Now before you get your knickers in a wad. You must know that Tom never knew of you." Rose plundered through her satchel again. This time she retrieved a letter and handed it to Victoria. "Here this will help with my story. Before you read that, Victoria. I need to you to know that I couldn't betray Tom's trust no more than I could betray yours. It is yours to share with the family if you wish."

Victoria nodded knowing that Rose was true to her word. If she was told to keep a secret, she would keep it. Victoria unfolded the letter hesitantly before breathing in much needed air. She began to read out loud the words from her husband to his sister.

 _"Dearest Rose,_

 _I know it is of rare occasion that I write. However, I am asking that you allow me the need of trying to have some levity of my guilt. I love Victoria like no other. No one can hold the place in my heart as she does. She is my world along with those two sons of mine. If I were to lose them, I'd lose myself."_

Victoria hesitated as she watched Heath with a quick glance. He felt uncomfortable but she was sure he wanted the truth. She started to read again...

" _Loving her comes easy. Betraying her was not something I saw in myself doing as a man. She deserves so much more. However, I did just that. I betrayed our marriage because of a lust and perhaps love of a young beautiful woman. This woman was kind and tender to me. I was drawn to her as I never felt except for Victoria. She never knew I was married until it she gave me her heart and body. The guilt of it pouring out the truth as I headed away from her. I left her a letter trying to explain. A coward to face this girl because I knew the depth of her love for me. My biggest regret is that I couldn't share that love as I was so deeply in love with my wife. Know this, dearest sister, she was a good woman of virtue despite how it may look in your eyes._

 _Finally to the reason I write. The guilt has gnawed at me for so long that I had to share it with someone I could trust. I had thought of telling Victoria but knew she was distraught with her sister's illness over the years. Therefore, I am sharing you this confidence as I make a request that I hope you can do for me. I ask that you go to a mining camp called Strawberry. I ask that you look up Leah Thomson. Make sure she is well. You don't have to report to me. However, if she is in need of anything. Please make sure she has it._

 _Your loving brother,_

 _Thomas_

Victoria folded the letter up handing it back to Rose. Rose shook her head as she spoke. "I was a fool not to tell Tom of Heath. A fool. But I did go to Strawberry. I did see Leah Thomson and I met the boy. I met you, Heath. I knew immediately you were his son. I was going to tell Tom but your mother pleaded for me not to. She said Tom had a wife to think of." Rose felt a tear tickle her eyelashes. "You were in a bad way then, Victoria. Your sister had very little time to live. Heath was around three of four years old when I met him. I stayed two weeks in Strawberry because I wanted to know this son of Tom's. Leah Thomson allowed me that. He was a spit fire of a little boy. He was a lot ornerier than even Nicholas. His mama was a stubborn woman but she was twice as prideful. She made it plain that Thomas Barkley chose to the woman he loved. She wouldn't take his charity nor would her son. Her words were harsh when she said that Heath would never be second best to Tom's other children."

"That wouldn't happen." Nick interjected angrily. His voice ringing loudly against the den walls. "Father would have loved him as would mother."

"I know." Rose could see the redness in Heath's face. His anger was justified. She still went on addressing Heath. "I think your mother knew that too inside herself. I guessed that caused her fear that Tom and Victoria would take you in to raise. I saw how you lived, Heath. There was very little in your home as far as material things. But that mother of yours loved you so fiercely. She would die before she gave you up. So she feared losing you to Tom Barkley. Tom had become wealthy by this point in time. Leah had nothing to show she was the better for you. So out of fear and pride, she begged to keep the secret of you. I refused at first. However, she threatened to leave where no one could find you or her." She glanced at Victoria saying in a small voice. "Then I arrived to see your grief of losing you beloved sister, Victoria. It wasn't in me to add more pain to your life. So I did what I thought best and I kept three people's secrets."

Heath cleared his throat. "If you all will excuse me, I need some air."

Heath marched out the doors towards the stables. Horses always had a way of calming him down.

"He'll be okay, Rose." Victoria assured her. "He's stubborn but always thinks things through. I know the dilemma you faced then. Right or wrong, you did what you thought best."

Audra watched Heath go outside. She watched as Jarod, Nick, and Eugene studied the photos stating how much Heath looked like a Barkley even more so than the three of them put together. She then wondered if anyone but her self noticed her aunt Rose's words. She kept _three people's secrets_.

 _End of Chapter Five. To be cont..._

 **Note. Thanks again for the reviews. It is very much appreciated.**


	6. Chapter 6

_Chapter 6: Proving Something to Someone_

Heath stood out by the stables brushing down his horse, Charger. He had not spoken to Rose much since her arrival two days earlier. If anything, he was trying to avoid her. He left the dinner table before finishing his meal. Audra had showed up shortly after he left the room. She knew Heath was trying to get away from the fact at least one Barkley knew of his existence as a child. He closed his eyes trying to focus his anger on his care of his horse. Audra propped herself up on the fence staring out over the ranch. She never spoke a word as she sat there. She figured Heath didn't need words. He needed to think. He also needed to put his anger back into his hidden places as he always did.

It was Aunt Rose who broke the strained silence. She approached like a clap of thunder. Her voice was loud for a lady. "I did wrong by you. Maybe wrong by Tom, Victoria and their other children too. Not making excuses but do you care to hear why?"

Heath turned his head to stare at Rose. No words were uttered. Rose winked at Audra before stating. "Well, you are a talkative one. Aren't you?"

Audra chuckled a little bit despite Heath's angry eyes. She bit her lip trying to stifle her giggle. However, her attempt caused a smile to cross Heath's face despite his anger at Aunt Rose. Rose watched the two interact causing a thought to cross her mind. She shook away that notion before continuing her speech.

"Your mother insisted Tom not know of you. The more I tried to convince her that Tom deserved to know, the more Leah convinced me that Tom's family would suffer. She said then you'd suffer more as the child, who no Barkley would want. I told her Tom would love you and Victoria would accept you and love you too..." Aunt Rose wiped a tear from her cheek. "But I wasn't sure of how it would really work. Victoria was a prideful woman. Not all her children have Tom's pride. They have hers too. I suspect the same of your mother and you. I feared Leah may be right. Not only would my youngest brother lose his wife, his children would lose the family they knew. I feared everyone would lose to the secret of you. Any way, your mother said she'd run with you. She'd not take a chance of Tom Barkley taking the thing she loved the most. I believed her. I only agreed to keeping her secret if she informed me of your life through letters. She kept to her promise. I tried to send money. She'd send it back stating it wasn't my place to do so. She found it being charity and she'd not have it. Like Victoria Barkley, Leah Thomson was a prideful woman." Aunt Rose's voice cracked with unshed tears. "I was wrong in so many things. But I will never regret keeping up with your life even if that life bore me so much pain due to your life being so painful."

Heath could see the sincerity in Aunt Rose's eyes. He also knew his mother was as Rose said. Leah Thomson was protecting the man she loved from losing what he loved. It pained Heath to admit it. But his mother put Tom Barkley's happiness far above her own.

"I understand." Heath said in a low voice. "It don't make it better inside. But I understand."

Aunt Rose nodded her head. "That's all I can expect."

Audra joined Rose as they walked back towards the house. Heath opted to ride Charger for a while across the ranch. He needed to be alone to process all of his emotions. Rose and Audra entered the house as they spotted the other Barkley's gathered around the hearth. Rose sat down trying to rest a little before heading up to rest after her long talk with Heath.

Heath entered about thirty minutes later. All three Barkley men spoke of the ranch. It seemed to her that Heath knew almost as much about ranching as Nick. However, Nick was obviously the more in charge of the three brothers when it came to the ranch. Jarrod seemed to be more of a listener until they spoke of the family's other business adventures. Then Jarrod was the one in complete charge. Heath was the one who spoke little but when he did, his words held meaning. Nick seemed to hang on to Heath's words when he spoke of horses. Aunt Rose supposed that Heath had the heads up on that subject.

She noted how Jarod spoke authoritative as well as Nick's voice bellowing when he didn't agree with something. She watched the twinkle in Victoria's eyes as her sons debated a lumberyard they owned. Aunt Rose also noted how Heath seemed to quite down and step away from his brothers. Rose saw how Heath glared into the flames of the fire dancing in the fireplace. He seemed to want to ignore his brothers' conversation. It wasn't long before Heath dismissed himself saying he needed to do more work but had something to get from his room.

Aunt Rose was almost ready to go up herself when she stopped suddenly at hearing Jarod say the name Matt Bentell. Rose swiftly turned around as she stared at the Barkleys, who were still talking of the lumber mill.

"What name did you say?" Rose crossed her arms over the girth of chest. "Did I hear right? Did you say Matt Bentell?"

"Yes." Victoria spoke noticing Rose's face burn red. Even Rose's freckles seemed to catch fire on her face. "He is our manager at the logging company."

Rose felt the weight of Victoria's words hit her as she allowed her robust body to sink slowly into an adjacent chair. "Do you know who that is?"

Victoria watched as Jarrod and Nick walked to lean their elbows against the mantle. They watched as smile formed on their mother's face. "We realize that the war was the past."

"Does Heath realize this?" Rose's cheeks had flushed even a brighter shade of red. "That man ran Carterson Prison."

"He knows." Victoria assured her. "He.."

Before Victoria could finish her sentence, Nick interrupted. "Sure he does. Heath was the one who Mother insisted help Matt start up the log flume."

Jarrod joined in. "Yes. Matt Bentell has really brought forth a great logging company. The money that flume has helped us bring in is substantial as Matt said it would."

Victoria noticed that Aunt Rose's face grew even brighter red with what she perceived as anger. Therefore she added. "Heath had a terrible hatred in him then. I thought he needed to rid himself of that hate before it ate him up. Living, eating, and protecting Matt helped him." Victoria seemed proud of that fact. "I reminded Heath that he needed to show me some of Tom's guts. He went along and came back the better for it."

That was the last straw for Aunt Rose Barkley. Nick Barkley took after his aunt when it came to saying what he wanted to say without worry of his words. Therefore, Aunt Rose Barkley was about to let her family hear her thoughts whether they liked it or not.

"How dare all of you!" Rose stood up and began to pace. Her round body jiggled as she went. If the Barkleys weren't so surprised by Rose's outburst, they'd have found it hilarious. However, there was nothing hilarious about Rose's anger. "Do you not know what that boy went through?"

"We know." Victoria was trying to reassure her without making things worse. "Heath told us..."

"Nothing!" Rose stopped long enough to catch her breath. She looked at all her family. She took her time with each. She noted they were listening intently. Only Audra seemed puzzled and innocent in all of this. "Knowing that boy for only a couple of days, I can assume he told very little. I assume Heath told enough to let you know he suffered."

"He did..." Nick's voice boomed as anger was hitting him at the implications that Rose knew of Heath more than they did. "He's my brother."

"Indeed he is." Rose took a deep breath before sitting down again. She fanned her face trying to rid herself of the heat. "How old was he, Victoria?"

"Excuse me?" Victoria settled back as she frowned looking in confusion at Aunt Rose.

"I guess all of you let that money, which Matt Bentell offered to bring in, cloud your mind on the fact that Heath was only a boy." Rose spit out angrily. "I know because Leah Thomson wrote me of Heath running away at age eleven to join the Union Army. She wrote of Heath sending all the money he could from his pay. He was twelve when they made him a sharp shooter. A boy of age twelve became a marksman to kill men! Then at the same age of twelve, he was captured with men! A boy captured and tortured like the rest of them. He was beat and starved like the rest. But he wasn't like the rest. He was a boy. A boy that in no way Matt Bentell could not know of being just that..A boy!" Rose tried to swallow down the bile that was forming in her throat. "Leah Thomson wrote of his return home at age thirteen. His body was barely strong enough to walk no less do anything else. Heath's back bore raw flesh from his beatings." Rose began to sob in her hands. "And I was an aunt who did nothing but read of Heath's troubles. I did nothing." She looked up with tear stained face. "But you better believe that I'd never ask that boy to face his demons of the likes of Matt Bentell. No matter how much money the man could bring to this family."

"OH Rose!" Victoria shrieked. "It wasn't like that."

"Heath is more than any money!" Nick bellowed. His voice then softened. "He's every thing."

Rose squared back her shoulders. "You have no idea what life that boy has lived. You'll never know either. Heath won't be telling those stories. He has stubborn pride too. But Leah Thomson used letters to me as her sounding board when things got too much for her shoulders to bare of the boy." Rose drew in a deep breath. "You spoke of Tom's guts. Heath doesn't have anything to prove of Tom or the Barkley's. It is Tom, who could use some of that boy's guts." Rose held up her hand before Jarod or Nick could object. "He's my brother. I've earned the right to opinion of him considering I helped raise Tom. Tom was flawed as we know. We all are. But somethings, even Tom Barkley didn't have guts for. That was trying to find out about Leah's life once he left. He sent his sister to do it. Tom feared losing what he loved the most. That was you, Victoria. I feared the truth too. Even Leah had no guts to face the truth. She didn't want to face that she was second choice to Victoria Barkley. For that, Heath was the one to suffer." Rose closed her eyes as more tears squeezed through her eyelids. "If I see Matt Bentell, I'd kill him myself. As sure as I am sitting here, I wouldn't sit and eat with him. He tortured Heath, my nephew. War or no war. The man should suffer for making a twelve year old boy suffer as he did."

Guilt gnawed at the Barkleys after Rose's words. She could no longer take the pain she was feeling of guilt and sorrow for Heath. She headed to be alone as did the rest. Most of the evening was spent in solitude. It seemed all muddled through until they could retire to an early bed.

The only one who remained awake was Audra. She had bathed and changed into her night robes before walking downstairs to try to find a book to read. She couldn't sleep thinking of how much none of them really knew about Heath.

She settled in a chair beside the fireplace when a sound caused her to look up. Heath walked up as he threw a few logs on the fire. "You're up late."

"I couldn't sleep." Audra admitted as she closed the book, which she tried in vain to read.

"I heard Rose's outburst earlier this evening." Heath timidly admitted.

Audra stood up and went to Heath. She didn't speak a word as she laid her head against his chest. He smoothed down her long blond hair. He tried his best to comfort her.

"I'm okay, Audra." Heath whispered in a soothing voice. "Aunt Rose is feeling guilt about something that can't be helped." He felt Audra sobbing against his chest. Her body trembled as she continued to cry. He pulled her tighter as he added. "I think I've proved myself a Barkley to Mother and my brothers. I plan on proving that to you too."

"No. Heath, you don't understand." Audra looked up at Heath. Her piercing blue eyes caused him to catch his breath in his lungs. She said with a tear filled voice. "You don't have to prove that you are worthy of us." Wiping away a few tears, Heath took his thumb across Audra's cheek as she spoke."Don't you see? If there is something to prove to someone, it is us proving we are worthy of you."

Aunt Rose had come downstairs to witness Audra's and Heath's interaction. She took in a slow lingering breath before she allowed the notion of earlier that day enter her mind. Once again, she shook those thoughts away.

 **NOTE: Thanks again for the reviews! It is greatly appreciated.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Fist and foremost, thanks for all the wonderful reviews. Secondly, I love the insight some of you have into the story I'm trying to weave. I'm afraid it may disappoint but I hope not. I've been scouring the fanfiction of BV and have yet to find a story with this premise. So forgive me if I step on the Barkley's once in a while. But do continue to tell me what you like and dislike about the story and the characters. Now on with the story...**

 _Chapter 7: Aunt Lillian and Cousin Anna?_

Victoria had never laughed so hard in nearly seven years. She had been more reserved of her laughter since Tom Barkley's death. However, seeing Rose again caused her a moment to relish in the stories of her husband's past.

"Did he really, Aunt Rose?" Audra asked as she grinned. "Uncle Jim ate the whole pie to keep Father from getting any?"

"He sure did." Rose had a twinkle in her eye as she remembered her brothers in their youth. She was 14 years older than Tom and 12 older than Jim. She was more like a mother to them than sister. Their mother, Audra Renee Barkley, was very ill at the time the boys were born. She had passed away when Tom was six. However, Rose was the one that took care of her brothers long before the passing of her mother. "But what Jim didn't know was that Tommy knew Jim would do just that. So he stuffed the pie with finely cut up prunes. Jim didn't keep from running to the bathroom for two days."

All of the family laughed. Even Heath couldn't keep from laughing at hearing of his mischievous father's antics. Audra noticed as she headed to stand by Heath.

She looped her arm in his. "Having fun?"

"Boy howdy, Sis." Heath winked at her as he added his hand over hers. "Rose sure has a lot of stories to tell."

"Yes. She does." Audra pulled Heath with her to sit on the soft cushioned sofa so they could listen to more stories.

It was Jarod, who asked a question that caused both Rose and Victoria to have a strange look pass their countenances. Heath and Audra were the only two to notice the look as they were paying attention due to sitting across from the older females.

"You delivered Audra. Didn't you, Aunt Rose?" Jarod took a draw off his cigar. "I remember that Father and us boys were on a fishing trip with Uncle Ben and his sons."

"I remember that." Nick interjected. "That was the best day and the worst day when we got back."

"What do you mean?" Audra asked as she sat up stiffer. "You don't seem to be joking?"

"No. I'm not. And I didn't mean it as such." Nick apologecially turned to stare at his sister.

"What brother Nick is referring to was the fact that you were born but Aunt Lillian and Cousin Anna had passed away." Jarod hadn't meant to bring up a story to cause pain. He was trying to alert Heath on how much Rose had helped out with the family years ago.

"Who are Aunt Lillian and Cousin Anna?" Audra's brow creased in confusion. "I also never heard of Uncle Ben." Heath glanced at her. He realized, that this time, he wasn't the only one out of the loop of family tales.

Victoria glanced worriedly at Rose before clearing her throat. She smiled weakly. "Lillian was my twin sister, Audra." She blinked back tears. "Little Anna was the baby born to her. Both died at Anna's birth."

"You never spoke of them." Audra slid her hand to grasp Heath's. For some reason, she felt comfort in his touch. The facts of Lillian and Anna caused her heart to race for an odd reason.

"She was very special to your mother, Audra." Rose tried to help Victoria as she could see the pain etched on Victoria's face. "Lillian and your mother were identical twins. Your mother had a very difficult time of it then."

"Yes." Victoria's voice was strained with tears that lingered behind her gray orbs. "Lillian was like a part of me. She died giving birth to Anna. We had both been so excited to find out we were carrying children at the same time. Lillian was such a weak child. She feared she couldn't have children. However, miracles happened. We both found out we were nearly the same in pregnancy. However, Lillian grew weaker as her pregnancy went along." Victoria took a moment to swallow trying to hold back tears.

"You don't need to talk of this." Rose blurted out. "It still hurts you so."

"I'm sorry, Mother." Audra allowed a tinge of guilt surface.

"No. I loved Lillian. I should've told you and Gene of her sooner." Victoria smiled as she leaned to pat Audra's knee. "When Gene comes in for a visit again, I'll make sure he knows of Lillian. Any way, Ben left after she died. He hurt too bad to stay around. The man had lost three wives previously. I guess he had counted on Lillian to make it the long haul with him. He had three sons already from his former wives. He kept insisting that Lillian would have him a daughter. Both Anna and you were born the same day. It was a strange coincidence because the pregnancies were two months apart. Anna was born too early. She died within an hour of her birth. Lillian died shortly after." Victoria was having a very hard time talking.

Rose interjected. "I delivered both you girls." Her smiled caused Victoria time to compose herself. "I'll never forget how much you played with your daughter's hair, Victoria."

"I remember." Victoria smiled at the memory although there was much more sadness in her than she was letting on. "You kept telling me to stop or the thick black hair would be torn out."

"I did." Rose laughed slightly. "But you sure did admire that girl of yours." Rose added very quickly."As did Lillian with Anna."

"I'm tired." Victoria stood up. The story had obviously caused her too much grief. "I think I should rest now."

"I'm ready for bed as well." Rose stood up. She glanced at them all. "I guess we can talk of the time Jim tied Tommy to a tree to keep him from tailing after him. I'll be glad to tell it tomorrow."

They all agreed they would love more stories from Rose of her brothers' antics.

Victoria kissed all her children's cheeks. She lingered longer on Audra's cheek before heading upstairs. Rose followed shortly after. Jarrod and Nick went to the study so they could talk about the lumber mill. They were debating what to do about Matt Bentell. They wanted him off their land and away from anything to do with the Barkley name. Heath deserved that much.

Audra sat there in stunned silence. Heath noticed so he grasped her hand tighter. "I guess it is strange not knowing your mother had a twin sister."

"It is." Audra admitted. She drew in a long breath of air. "But Heath, I remember Father always teasing me about being bald from birth. Father said he feared I'd never grow hair because not a lick of it showed up until I was almost two."

 **NOTE: Hmmm. I'm sure someone can guess who Ben and his boys may be. {;**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N In my original summary , I had mentioned that Ben Cartwright and his sons would play a part in the story. However, I took it out not wanting to ruin the story's plot twists even the minor ones. LOL They won't be mentioned much but in a few chapters. However, I didn't want this to be about the Cartwrights. The time frame of the Bonanza and the Big Valley are off a decade or so. However, I'm sticking as close to possible to Big Valley time frame. Since this is fanfic, I am taking liberties with time frame and ignoring some episodes after season 1 so this is AU. However, a few episodes may be sprinkled in here and there to make the story more interesting. Again, thanks for the continued support**.

 _ **Posting another chapter tonight because my last chapter was so short.**_

 _Chapter 8: Sneaking into Aunt Rose's Satchel_

Audra couldn't sleep for the next few nights. The fact that Rose had said that Mother had played with her daughter's thick black hair still consumed her thoughts. Audra also remembered the words of Rose keeping three people's secrets. Heath had worked long hours as usual. Audra so longed to confide her fears to him. For some reason, she felt he would be the only one to understand. Audra thought perhaps her imagination was getting the best of her. But she felt a nagging in her gut that she needed more information on her Aunt Lillian and her deceased child.

Audra remembered when she was a little girl asking about the tattered satchel, which Rose had called her satchel full of truths. She had told Audra that she kept the satchel as a reminder of all her knowledge of things in her life and some of others lives. Audra had loved when Rose pulled out some things to show her. Most of the things were photos or old love letters from some of Rose's beaus. Audra had giggled when Rose would read them while making squishing kissing noises. Although Rose was a robust woman with little to look at as far as appearance, she had a personality that caused boys to pursue her once they got to know her. However, Rose was more interested in the upkeep of her brothers rather than interested in having children or a husband of her own.

Rose had informed the family that she'd be leaving in two days to head back East. She had enjoyed her visit thoroughly but wanted to be back in her own house. Heath had got to know his aunt a little. However, he still didn't take to strangers as well as Rose would've liked. He no longer held animosity towards her. However, he chose to be away from the boisterous woman. Nick was the only boisterous Barkley preferred as company by Heath.

Heath and Nick came in after a dusty branding session. Nick called the bath first as usual. Heath didn't fuss, which was also a usual occurrence. Audra had heard Nick's shouting that he called the bath while she sat in the parlor reading a book. Audra stood up quickly to make her way to see Heath. She was hoping he was alone. That wish came true when she spotted Heath pulling off his boots and stretching out his legs.

Heath looked up to see Audra standing over him. "Where's Mother and Rose?"

"They went with Jarrod to Stockton. Rose wanted to see where he worked as well as get a few things to take back with her." Audra ran her finger over the back of the chair where Heath was sitting. "Did you work hard today, Heath?"

"You betcha. Boy howdy, me and Nick had us a day." Heath said as he leaned back after tossing his boots aside. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, that means Nick worked hard too." Audra continued to run her finger over the wooden edge of Heath's chair.

"Yep. Mighty hard." Heath jutted up an eyebrow. "Where ya goin' with this, Audra?"

"Nick will be in that bathtub soaking for at least an hour. Don't you think?" Audra slid her finger over the wood then slightly over Heath's shoulder. "Jarrod promised Mother and Aunt Rose a late supper after his work. They'll be gone for at least a few more hours from shopping and dinner."

"Shoppin' and dinner." Heath narrowed his eyes on Audra. He teased with a half grin. "And you passed that up?"

"I have a favor to ask." Audra bit her lip slightly hoping Heath would listen and do as she asked. "Silas said it would be an hour and a half before our dinner is ready."

"I knew you were up to somethin'." Heath placed his hands behind his head. He closed his eyes only to open one eye to look at her. "What's the favor?"

"Help me look through Aunt Rose's satchel." Audra blurted out knowing Heath would protest.

"What fer?" Heath shook his head in disapproval. "That's her private property."

"Oh please, Heath." Audra batted her eyes hopefully. "I promise to only look for a specific time frame. I won't mess with any of her other things. Please help me. Nick won't be in the bath for over an hour. If we both look, we can find it faster. Please."

"Let me guess. You want letters that may or may not be there from the time you were born?" He knew Audra had been thinking about Lillian and Anna. "It ain't right searching through another person's belongings, Audra."

"Oh Heath, please." Audra fell slowly to her knees in front of him. "If you thought for one second you could've found out about Father sooner, wouldn't you have tried to?"

"Of course." Heath shook his head as he grasped Audra's small soft hands in his large calloused hands. "But this is more curiosity about an aunt and cousin you never met."

"That's true." Audra admitted as she stood up with the help of Heath."But I can't help the nagging feeling that something else is going on that Mother and Aunt Rose are keeping from us. Especially me."

"It ain't right, I tell you." Heath said as he watched the disappointment spread over Audra's face.

She stood up to walk away. Heath stood up to. He grabbed her hand pulling her with him. "Well, hurry it up. Nick is on his second bellowin' of that stupid song. If he makes it through that one, we only have two more verses before he heats up his water."

"Oh thank you, Heath." Audra tiptoed and kissed his cheek quickly. "I promise to not look at anything else!"

Soon Audra and Heath were in the guest room plundering through Rose's satchel. Heath rubbed his neck. "I feel a might bit guilty over this."

"Look." Audra pushed a stack of photos his way. "I didn't even look at them. Even if I'm curious."

Heath shook his head as he placed a stack of letters aside not having the date Audra wanted. He stopped suddenly when a large bundle of letters caught his eye. He ran his finger over the print on the front.

"What is it, Heath?" Audra stared up at him as she flipped through a group of letters from her mother to Rose.

"Letters from Mama to Rose." Heath swallowed. He was surprised about how many letters from his mother were in the bundle. He realized the letters were the letters his mother, Leah, had promised Rose in order for the secret of him to remain just that...a secret.

"If you want to read them, I understand." Audra placed her hand on Heath's shoulder. "Maybe it will help ease some of your questions."

"Nope." Heath tossed the letters aside. "This is about your questions. Not mine."

Audra shook her head in agreement before continuing her quest. She found some letter from that time period. However, they were letters mostly bragging on the children including what a beautiful baby Audra was. Then Audra found an old leather journal. She skimmed the dates not bothering to read Rose's personal entries besides the one she desperately needed to see. She stopped suddenly at noticing the date of an entry in the journal. Heath noticed her hesitation as she glared at the page in the leather bound journal.

"Is it the right time frame?" He asked knowing by Audra's face, it was.

Audra shook her head. "Two weeks after I was born. It was probably written when Aunt Rose returned to her home in the East." Audra glanced up at Heath. "I just have to know why mother kept her twin sister from Gene and I." She tried to reason with herself more than Heath. "I know it may be wrong. But I have to know."

"It might not be a thing, Audra." Heath assured her. "Maybe it was Mother grieving so for her sister. I heard tell that twins have a very special connection. It may have hurt mother to mention Lillian or Anna."

"Maybe." Audra slowly swallowed before she glanced at Heath. "But this may help me understand a little more."

Audra began to read the entry. As she continued to read , her hands began to shake nervously. Her breathing picked up. Heath tried to allow her time to read the entry. However, he reached for her when Audra's body began to tremble. He pulled her to him as he allowed her to continue to read Rose's entry. Heath noticed Audra's tears slowly dripping on her cheeks. When he asked her to show him what she was reading, she thrust the leather journal to him as her body wracked with harsh sobs. Heath's arms enveloped Audra as he tried in vain to quite her.

"Audra, please don't cry." Heath begged as his fingers entangled in her blonde tendrils of hair. "Let me help you."

"Oh Heath." Audra sobbed against his chest. He could feel his dusty shirt becoming wet with her tears. "I thought I'd find something but I guess I never really believed my imaginations. But ..." She tried to quiet herself. "it is all there. The truth."

Heath took the journal in his hand and began to read it. He thought it would be much easier than Audra trying to explain due to her hysterics. Heath read the words as he squeezed Audra closer to him.

The words flowed off the page like a dam breaking free. Rose's words about the secret that Lillian took to her grave. A secret only the two woman, who lived that night to keep among themselves. They never shared with anyone and the secret was something that Tom or Ben never knew. That no one but three desperate women knew. He closed the journal up and placed everything back into Rose's satchel.

"Come on." Heath helped Audra up after he put the satchel as they found it. "We need to get out of here before we have to explain to Nick."

He walked Audra to her bedroom. He figured that she was so distraught, she needed to lie down. Audra had stopped sobbing but was still gulping in air from her harsh cries. He sat her on her bed as he told her to rest.

"Here. Calm down." Heath helped her to lay on her bed. He raked his hand across her wet cheeks trying to comfort her."Take a nap before dinner, Sis."

"I'm not your sister, Heath." Audra gulped. "I'm not even a Barkley."

 **Note: I'm sure everyone guessed that was coming.**


	9. Chapter 9

_Chapter 9: Boy Howdy, Do Secrets Cause Pain_

"She didn't eat much breakfast." Victoria worriedly glanced up towards Audra's room. "Perhaps, I should send after Dr. Benson?"

Dr. Benson was the new doctor in town. He was around the age of forty five. He took over once in a while when the town doctor had other pressing matters in outer parts of the city of Stockton.

"No. Don't do that just yet." Heath stood up pushing his own half eaten plate across the table. "I'll check on her."

Jarrod could see the concern etched on Heath's face. It was the same look Heath had when he kept the secret of Nick's rabid wolf attack. It was that of loyalty to a sibling yet fear of whatever secret the two younger Barkley's were keeping. Jarrod hoped this go round, Audra hadn't put something on Heath's shoulders too heavy to bear. It wasn't fair to the newest addition to the family as Nick had unwittingly done to him.

Heath knocked on Audra's door lightly. When he heard her soft voice bid him entrance, he opened the door. Audra was staring out the window in deep thought. Heath saw a few stray tears run down her cheeks.

"Audra, Mother is worried as are the rest of us." Heath walked up cautiously placing his hands on her shoulder. "Let's go on a ride so we can talk this through."

"What's to talk about, Heath?" Audra sniffed before leaning back into Heath's arms for comfort. He gladly placed his arms around her allowing her to ease into his embrace. "I'm not a Barkley. I'm a Cartwright. I don't even know them."

"I do." Heath surprised Audra with that knowledge. She turned her body in his arms to stare up at him. Heath pushed her hair behind her ears as he ran his finger softly over her tear stained cheek. "I worked for them about three years back. They own a ranch in the Navada territory. Mighty fine folk if you ask me."

"Oh Heath." Audra's arms went around his neck. "What am I going to do?"

"Let's go ridin'." Heath stated again. "It'll help ya think some on the subject. We can talk all private like."

"Nick won't like you not working today." Audra desperately wanted to be alone to talk to Heath about their findings two days earlier. Rose had postponed her return to the East. She had worried over Audra's sudden melancholy attitude. All feared the girl was coming down with some sickness.

"The ranch survived twenty three years without me." Heath winked. "I don't reckon one more day will hurt none."

"According to Nick, it would." Audra knew how much Nick enjoyed Heath by his side now. They were counterparts as Rose had mentioned. Jarrod said they were opposite sides of the same coin. Of course, Heath had no clue what they were referring to and neither did Nick. "He's as grouchy as an old bear when you're not around."

"Boy howdy, I sure hate not being around him too." Heath took Audra's hand to pull her to her dresser. "But don't let him know that. He's already got a mighty fine opinion of himself. Don't need adding more to his ego. Now find some ridin' clothes. I don't plan on going for an easy ride with you. I want to let Charger run for a bit."

Audra loved Heath's southern drawl. It was charming the way his words slowly flowed from him. She's heard all the classy gentlemen at balls and parties. She had even heard cowboys come and go all her life. But none of those people had the charming drawl of Heath Barkley. She could listen to him talk for hours. Only, as Nick had said, Heath barely rubbed two words together when it came to conversation. She smiled to herself when she heard the door click shut behind Heath. It was her own pleasurable thought of Heath talking more to her than the rest of the family. At least, he had been lately.

Heath walked down stairs bristly. "I'm going riding with Audra."

"WHAT?" Nick bellowed. " This is a working ranch. You can't go out gallivanting with Audra today. There is a fence that needs mending on the East side. Some cattle broke out yesterday evening. There is some stock caught down in the muck in the South pasture. I'll be needing you, boy."

Heath started to protest but before he could, Jarrod interrupted. "Let him go, Nick. You'll be fine one day without him."

"But...but Heath's really the fastest about getting cattle moving from the muck." Nick tried to reason. "You take Audra riding."

Heath arched his eyebrow at hearing Nick practically bragging on him. "I really would like to go riding with Audra. Charger needs a good run or he gets restless. The cattle are not being cantankerous lately. That makes for a restless time for a horse like Charger."

Jarrod lit a cigar as he raised an eyebrow towards Nick. "Find a hand to do it. The ranch will survive a few hours without Heath."

"Just a few hours, Heath?" Nick asked as he rubbed the back of his neck. "I could really use you with those cattle. I don't trust anyone else to do the job like you."

"I'll be back to work before noon. The mud isn't deep enough to cause damage. They'll be tired is all. If you ask me, Barrett and the others can use a good ole muddy job to get them realizin' they are the hands not the bosses." Heath had the same sideways grin on his face usual for him.

Nick huffed an agreement to Heath's request before pushing his hat on his head. "Better be back in a couple hours tops. Hear me?"

"Yep." Heath agreed as he watched Nick storm off.

Jarrod uttered softly. "Whatever it is, Heath. Convince Audra that we are all here for her."

Heath nodded as he headed out to saddle the horses for Audra's and his ride.

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The sun was warm against the red sky. Morning dew still clung to the green grass of the meadow. Heath and Audra had allowed their horses to gallop freely before stopping them at the familiar tree. Both Heath and Audra dismounted then tied their horses to the hanging tree limbs. Heath stood perched against the tree as he watched the horses grazing on the fresh dew kissed grass. Audra spread out a thick bedroll to prevent moisture from the ground from touching her when she sat.

"It is strange knowing you're someone else than who you thought you were all your life." Audra finely broke the silence that hung thick in the air.

"Yep." Heath agreed as he kicked at the ground below him.

"I guess you would know that feeling." Audra glanced up at the handsome blonde cowboy. "I mean, like when you found out about being a Barkley after growing up not knowing."

"Yep." Heath kicked a rock on the ground in a circular pattern.

"Quit!" Audra raised her voice angrily. Audra noticed Heath raise his eyebrow much like Jarrod did. She crossed her arms defiantly over her chest. "I want your help. Your advice. Not just a silent nod or a yep."

Heath pushed his white hat back on his head. He stared down at Audra. His sky blue eyes catching her by surprise due the earnest care behind them. "The way I figure it. You're the one that needs to work it out." His southern drawl melted Audra's anger.

"True." Audra bit her lip as she looked down to play with the edge of the blanket. She pulled out a few threads before adding. "However, I really do want your opinion on the journal entry."

"Boy howdy, do secrets cause pain." Heath glanced up at the sky before looking back down at Audra. "Like my mama, those women thought they were keeping a secret for the best of reasons. But the truth hurts the longer it stays hidden." Heath breathed out. "Let's talk about the entry. We know the truth behind it."

"Yes." Audra agreed. "Rose wrote that Lillian knew she was dying and asked Mother to raise me as her own."

"Yep." Heath laughed at himself. "But what you don't know, Audra, is the feelings behind that entry. Perhaps, that is something you should talk to Mother and Rose about."

Audra stood up pulling the bedroll with her. She smiled gently at Heath before saying. "Yep."

 **A/N Thanks again for all the responses. As all know, the reviews help spur a writer on.**


	10. Chapter 10

_According to what I read on the ages of the Barkley's when Heath entered their lives. Jarrod was 32, Nick was 28, Heath was 23 (He said Tom Barkley was in Strawberry 24 years ago, making Heath 23 if you allow for Leah's pregnancy), Audra turned 19 the first season. I'm making Eugene 20 since it was never made plain if Audra was the youngest or he was. It will make my story more realistic with these ages._

 _Chapter 10: A Secret Untold_

Heath rode up to Nick, who was yelling at some of the crew for not doing the job as he saw fit. The truth was that Nick liked how Heath did the job. Even if the men did it the same as Heath, Nick always said Heath did it better. It was how things were on the ranch now that Heath was accepted by Nick. The rancher, dressed in black, was Heath's strongest supporter.

"Hey, big brother." Heath smiled lopsided as he rode Charger up to stand by Nick's horse, Coco. "Can you take a while away from here?."

"Now, Heath." Nick pushed his black hat back on his head as he wiped at his brow. "This ranch is a working ranch. I can't go taking off to ride around leisurely with my sister. Now can I?"

Heath glanced back over his shoulder at Audra, who held her own mare at a distance. "Your sister sure does need you right now, Nick."

At that statement, Nick's shoulders straightened. He sat straighter in his saddle. "My little sister needs me?"

Suddenly, the ranch work wasn't so important. Nick could see a sadness to his little sister's face from where he sat. Heath nodded to Nick. "I can take over the ranch work."

"Nonsense, boy." Nick steered his horse towards Audra's direction. "Family is more important. Let's go take care of family."

Heath smiled weakly agreeing with Nick. He yelled out. "Chad, you got the ridge fence. Barrett, you make sure the others do their job."

"Yes, Boss." Both men gladly accepted Heath's orders. They had learned their lessons on not obeying Heath Barkley. All the men were grateful that Heath talked Nick out of firing them long ago. Nick and Heath were strong supporters of one another. The men knew not to go against either or they'd have to deal with one brother or the other.

Nick approached Audra cautiously. "Are you okay, Little Sister?"

Audra nodded. "I will be." She reached to grip Nick's hand then let loose to steer her horse. "I will be, Nick."

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It wasn't long before Nick's bellowing called all the family into the study. If Audra wanted to address them, by gosh, Audra would get to address them.

Jarrod looked questioning at Nick as he made his way to sit on top of the large oak desk. Nick just shrugged showing he didn't know any more than the rest of them. The glances went to Heath, who made it plain by his facial expression, this was Audra's tale to tell.

Rose questioned if she should be in this meeting. It was the first words Audra spoke as the doors closed to the study. "Yes. This concerns you as well."

"Audra, you look so distraught, Darling." Victoria gripped her daughter's hand.

"Please sit, Mother." Audra weakly stated. She was trying to hold back tears from seeping past her long eyelashes. Heath noticed her nervous sadness. Therefore, he made his way to Audra. He placed his hand on her shoulder. Audra squeezed Heath's hand and didn't let go for fear she wouldn't be able to go through with the conversation.

"First, Mother." Audra sighed out as a tear trickled down her cheek. "I love you so much. Never, EVER, Doubt that love." Audra could see the confusion on Victoria's face.

"I love you too, Darling." Victoria swallowed nervously. She had no clue what her daughter was going to tell her. She feared Audra was very sick and had only shared the news of sickness with Heath. "Please, my sweet girl, talk to us."

"I wish Gene were here as well." Audra sighed. "But I can't hold off any longer."

Audra sniffed as the words caught in her throat. Nick spoke up. "Spill it, girl. You're going to break up. I can't stand to see you cry."

Heath squeezed Audra's shoulder for assurance. In turn, she squeezed Heath's hand. "I had some notions in my head. So I searched Aunt Rose's satchel."

"You did what?" Victoria glanced wearily at her daughter. "That's her personal stuff. You had no right. Did you help her in this, Heath Barkley?"

"Yep." Was the only answer they were getting from the blonde cowboy.

Rose's face grew white. If the girl had searched her journal, she feared the conversation would take a dreadful turn for Victoria. She hoped this was about Heath and his mother's letters. But she would have no such luck.

"I know it was wrong. Don't blame Heath. I begged him to help." Audra glanced back knowingly towards Heath. "He tried to talk me out of it. But I know I can win with all my brothers."

"Well, now, wait a cotton picking minute." Nick spoke loudly. "I don't do your ..." He paused as Audra's eyes met his. "Okay, we all do your bidding." He surrendered to the truth.

Audra tried to smile despite the situation. "The fact is that I know everything now."

"What are you talking about?" Jarrod had been listening intently. "What do you know? Does this have to do with Heath?"

"No." Audra could feel herself ready to run. However, Heath's touch caused her to gain the courage to go on.

"Dear Lord." Rose grabbed the arm of the chair. She sat down staring at Audra. "You read my journal."

"Only the entry near my birth date." Audra reasoned with her. "The only one that mattered to me."

"What are you talking about?" Victoria felt like she was about to faint. Surely, her lovely daughter didn't know the truth. "What did you write in your journal, Rose?"

Victoria's voice cracked as she spoke. She was having a difficult time holding her emotions in check.

"The truth, Victoria." Rose placed her hands over her face as tears wracked her body. "The truth. That journal is my comfort. I write things I can't handle keeping inside. I never thought any one would read my words."

"We're sorry for nosin' in your personal affairs, Rose." Heath spoke trying to help Audra along. She was shaking beneath the weight of his hand. "But Audra has every right to know. I know for a fact that secrets are too painful if kept. Right or wrong in your reasoning, she has every right to know."

"What in tar hill are you talking about?" Nick bellowed causing the family to jump at his outburst. He made a quirk to his mouth before he lowered his voice. "Would someone please speak up with out all the mystery?"

"Nick, let them collect themselves." Jarrod interjected cautiously. "Can't you see the females are having a hard time with this?"

"It's okay, Jarrod. Nick is right." Audra was crying openly. "I need to let it out. That's why I called you all in here. I didn't want to speak of this separately. I'm not a Barkley. I'm a Cartwright. Isn't that correct, Mother?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Nick raised his voice but shut his mouth quickly at seeing his mother in so much pained emotion.

"Oh, Audra." Victoria threw her arms around her distraught daughter. Audra released Heath's hand to grip her mother tightly to her. "I'm so sorry, Audra."

"Tell me, Mother. Please. I want to listen. NO matter what, I love you. You're my mother." Audra pleaded. "But I need to know the truth. It has been hidden far too long."

Victoria shook her head in agreement. She tried to speak through a very shaky voice.. "Rose, can you start the story until I can better collect myself?"

Jarrod and Nick glanced curiously at the distraught females. They knew they were the only ones not understanding what was going on. Even Nick held his tongue long enough to let Rose begin the story.

"Well." Rose cleared her throat as she kept her own tears at bay. "I had just made a long journey from Strawberry to find out I had a nephew. Leah Thomson was adamant about keeping Heath a secret. I was feeling awfully weary of it but knew to keep my brother happy, as well as Leah from high tailing it with Heath, I'd keep the secret of Heath from him and Victoria. When I arrived to visit Tom's family, I found that Victoria was pregnant again. She had only had Eugene a year before. Her sister, Lillian, had come in to visit. Lillian was getting closer to her due date so she wanted to be near her sister."

"I lost two babies to miscarriage between Jarrod and Nick. I then lost another child between Nick and Eugene. Times were terrible then as settlers tried to keep living despite the heart aches. I never knew if those three children were boys or girls. I wasn't far enough along. The loss of the children caused a rift between your father and me. I guess I didn't doubt he had an affair due to my pushing him away. I thought I couldn't give him more children, I wasn't worthy of being called a woman or his wife." Victoria held up her hand before any could speak in protest of her words. "It was the way a lot of married women thought. I allowed that lie to consume me despite Tom insisting that I gave him two wonderful sons." Victoria choked up again. "When he came back from Strawberry, we both decided to work on our marriage. Tom was overly attentive. I know why now. But I too was grasping at trying to be a better wife. Money started building. Tom Barkley soon had land and riches that we couldn't imagine before. It wasn't long that we settled in this valley with you two boys." She smiled weakly at Jarrod and Nick.

"Then I found out after seven years, I was pregnant again with Eugene. He was such an added blessing to us. Our marriage seemed completely repaired by his birth." Victoria smiled at the memory of Eugene's birth. "But it wasn't long that I was pregnant again."

Victoria closed her eyes trying to go on. Rose saw it was too much so she took over. "I came in in time to find out the men in the family had took a fishing trip at Lillian's insistence. Little Eugene was a good baby, who barely gave any trouble. Even if that was the case, I insisted on helping the two pregnant sisters while the men were away fishing. Unbeknown to us all, a storm came through causing a major flood where you boys were fishing."

"I remember." Jarrod interjected. "Uncle Ben was at his wit's end. He knew that Aunt Lillian was due any day with the baby. But we were stuck in Wayne Hills for at least two weeks longer than we planned."

Rose looked at Victoria waiting for her to finish the story. Victoria ached at the truth, she still preferred to have hidden. "It wasn't planned. Everything just happened so quickly."

 _Flash Back 19 years earlier_

 _Lillian and Victoria relaxed in front of the fireplace. Rose had insisted on taking care of Eugene for the past three days. Victoria was grateful as it gave her time to spend with her twin sister. Victoria glanced up from her knitting to see her sister grimace._

 _"Are you okay, Lillian?" Victoria asked anxiously as she watched her twin sister grab her stomach. "Is it the baby?"_

 _"I think so, Vicky." Lillian grimaced. "I need to go check on Little Joe's horse. I messed up by letting him out earlier."_

 _"Don't be silly, Lillian." Victoria stood up. She laid her knitting down as she headed to look out the window. "It's a terrible storm. I'll have one of our men get him back in the stall. You relax."_

 _Lillian nodded as she sat back in her chair. She grimaced again as the pain hit her alerting her to the baby trying to make her presence known. "Hold out, little child. I'm not ready for this."_

 _About a half hour later, the front doors burst open with Duke McCall carrying Victoria into the parlor. "SOMEONE, HELP ME!"_

 _"Dear Lord, what happened?" Rose came running from upstairs, where she had just put down baby Eugene for the night._

 _"She fell in the mud. Mrs. Barkley was trying to get some pony in from the rain. She slipped down a slope. I found her facedown in mud." Duke stated as he carried Victoria upstairs._

 _"Go get a doctor!" Lillian yelled in a panicked voice._

 _"The doctor isn't in, Mrs. Cartwright." Silas, the house servant stated at seeing the unconscious Victoria. "It seems the men were saying that Dr. Merar was helping some hurt in the flood."_

 _"It's true." Duke ran his hand nervously over his wet hair. "What can we do?"_

 _"Nothing." Rose glanced up. "I've delivered babies before. You go take care of the ranch business like my brother would expect. I'll take care of the girls."_

 _Duke begrudgingly did as he was told. The horses and cattle did need moved due to the torrential downpour._

 _Victoria woke up to excruciating pain. Rose had obviously stripped her of her muddy clothing as well as washed her clean. Victoria was in a white linen gown with no other garments on her. She saw that she was in the same guest room as her sister. Rose had Silas help her put both sisters in the same room._

 _"It's too early." Victoria whispered as she glanced down at wetness between her legs. Blood had mingled with water. "My baby. It's too early."_

 _At that very moment, Victoria heard a cry from the bed across the room. Lillian was crying in pain as Rose encouraged her to push. "Now, Lillian. Give it all you got. You're almost there." Rose glanced over at Victoria. "Hold on, Victoria. Hold on for me."_

 _It seemed like only seconds before Victoria heard a shrill cry from a baby. But it wasn't from Lillian's bed. Victoria had ignored Rose's orders as pain had hit her hard again. She couldn't help herself as she pulled her knees to her chest and pushed. Victoria pulled the baby up to her._

 _"Rose." Victoria begged as she clung to her very small baby girl. "Help me."_

 _"Dear!" Rose left a screaming Lillian to aide Victoria. "What have you gone and done by yourself, Child?"_

 _Rose quickly cut the child's umbilical cord and clipped it off. She then cleaned the child up. She tossed the after birth in a near by dry sink basin before handing the girl to her mother. "Looks like you and Tom have your girl."_

 _"She's beautiful." Victoria twirled her daughter's black hair around her finger. "She looks like Nicholas."_

 _"She does indeed." Rose smiled before she heard some groaning coming from Lillian. What she didn't say was how shallow the baby's breaths seemed to be coming. She also didn't comment on how small the child was. Instead, Rose turned to glance at Lillian then back to Victoria. "I'll be. It seems you sisters are going to give birth the same day."_

 **A/N-The story of the birth of Audra will continue next update. Hopefully, I'll answer all questions.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N Reminder that Big Valley is the time line I'm trying to be close to not Bonanza. The Cartwright's ages won't match up to the series but are used for my story as I need them.**

 _Chapter 11: Secrets Untold II_

 _ **Flash back 19 years ago cont.** _

_Lillian had closed her eyes as the sharp pain continued to wreak havoc on her small body. She couldn't keep awake any longer. Therefore, she succumbed to sleep. Rose glanced worriedly at both sisters. One, whose child was here. The other, whose child was yet to born._

 _Victoria was in denial. Rose knew it as she watched Victoria trying to get her baby girl to give suck. However, the small baby was too weak to even try to engage in feeding._

 _Victoria's fingers continued to entangle gently in the child's dark tendrils of hair. She was soothingly talking to the baby. "Anna, please eat for mother."_

 _"I thought you were going to name her Audra." Rose had washed down Victoria as well as changed her soiled bedding. She was now standing between the two beds as she waited for her next duty._

 _"I was going to. But for some reason, Anna seems to fit her." Victoria smiled up at Rose. "I'll name my next daughter Audra after your mother."_

 _Rose shook her head trying to keep her negative thoughts from showing. "You best quit playing so much with her hair lest you pull it all out." Rose teased before turning to Lillian. She heard Lillian stir. "Are you waking, Lillian? You need to push again. The baby won't make it if you don't push again."_

 _Lillian glanced over at her sister. Her weak voice trying to talk. "I'm not going to make it, Vicky."_

 _"Don't speak like that, Lilly." Victoria had not called her sister Lilly since they were children. Lillian preferred to be called Lillian even if Victoria didn't mind being called Vicky by her twin. Victoria pleaded as she glanced from her baby to her sister. "You have to for your baby. You have to for Ben."_

 _Lillian's tears streaked her face as she spoke. "Ben doesn't love me, Vicky."_

 _"Nonsense." Victoria tried to smile behind the pain of seeing her sister so weak. Lillian was always the sickly one since birth. Victoria always felt it was up to her to be the strength for both of them._

 _"He married me for those boys of his. He wanted them a mother." Lillian whispered softly. "I think he's done falling in love. Joe's mother was the last straw for him. His other two wives lost the battle to settling in the West. They were too weak to handle such a life. Little Joe's mother was an Indian. She could handle it because she was used to having a hard life. But still she was taken. Little Joe is his favorite even though he loves his boys all the same. I guess because he thought that Little Joe's mother would be his last wife. Then he ended up marrying me. But he wanted a mother for them not really a wife for himself. I know. A woman knows."_

 _Lillian closed her eyes again ignoring the pain that was alerting her that her child needed to be born. It was while Lillian slept for the next half hour that a terrible tragedy took place. Little Anna Barkley stopped breathing. Lillian was awoken by her twin sister's eerie scream. She knew. Rose knew. Any one that heard the scream knew. Downstairs in the kitchen, Silas had even known that scream even if he didn't know whose scream it was. It was a scream of a mother losing a child. No scream could ever sound so stricken with grief as that type scream._

 _Rose allowed Victoria a few moments to cry over her child. However, she saw the paleness of Lillian. The woman was dying with a child still in her womb._

 _Rose pried Victoria's arms from Anna's lifeless body. "Shhh. I need you to help me, Victoria. We can't allow two children to die tonight."_

 _Victoria's body shook with grief as she glanced up at Rose. Her arms still shaped in an embrace even if her dead child had been taken from her. "Why? Why?"_

 _"I don't know, Victoria." Rose pushed back Victoria's dark hair from her grey eyes. She glanced at the pillow, which she had laid the lifeless Anna before speaking sadly but determined to not let another baby die on this night. "All I know is that your sister is so weak. She's not pushing that baby out of her. I can't operate as a doctor may do. That baby is going to die inside her. You need to let me put Anna down. You need to grieve later."_

 _"What can I do?" Victoria felt such a loss. How was she going to help her sister when she was drowning in her own grief?_

 _"I know your weak." Rose grabbed her arm. "But I need you to get behind Lillian. I need you to help hold her so she can push. I know this is hard on you. I know you deserve your time to grieve for that girl of yours. But Lillian needs you more right now."_

 _Victoria weakly sat with Lillian's back cradled against her chest. Victoria held Lillian's legs pulled up allowing Lillian to push easier. Victoria's own body felt the pain of her sister pushing hard against her. Victoria was still weak and sore from her own delivery of a child. Soon Lillian screamed one last scream as pain hit her._

 _The baby girl was pink and healthy as she came into the world. She was kicking and protesting with a mighty scream of life filling her small lungs. Lillian passed out as soon as the baby was born. Once again, Rose cleaned up and took care of a new life. Rose tried to hold the baby against Lillian to nurse it. However, the baby seemed to not get any milk._

 _Lillian's eyes opened to see the efforts of Rose trying to get the baby to nurse. "I can't." Lillian whispered weakly. "Allow Victoria to nurse her. I can't."_

 _Lillian passed out again as Victoria tiredly made her way back to her own bed. Rose glanced at her deeply saddened sister in law. Victoria held back tears as she reached for Lillian's crying daughter. "She's hungry."_

 _Rose nodded as she handed Victoria the baby, who quickly latched on to Victoria's breast. Eagerly, the baby girl took in the sustenance needed for life. Victoria's shoulders shook with tears as she nursed her sister's child while realizing her own child lay dead merely feet away. Rose went about caring for Lillian after wrapping a soft quilt around Anna's lifeless body._

 _Lillian woke up to see Victoria nursing her child. She watched as Victoria hummed a lullaby despite her own pain. Lillian felt of her sweaty hair and ran her hand slowly down her soft clean gown, which Rose had changed her into. "What are you going to name her, Vicky?"_

 _"What?" Victoria looked up from the nursing child in confusion._

 _"I'm dying, Vicky." Lillian batted her eyes. "If not today, soon. I can feel it. I felt my death coming as I carried her. I held on for that baby in your arms. That child was never meant to be mine. She's yours, Vicky. Please make her your daughter. Do this as my dying request."_

 _"Don't talk like that, Lilly." Victoria pleaded as she glanced to her sister's begging eyes. "Ben has a right to know of his daughter."_

 _Lillian shook her head. "No. Victoria. Think of it. Anna can be my daughter and Ben's. That child is yours. It is for the best."_

 _"I can't do Ben like that." In her grief, Victoria was already contemplating her sister's request. "I can't."_

 _"What kind of life will a girl have with only a father and a pack of boys?" Lillian cried weakly. "Ben still wants to settle in Nevada. It's his dream to own a large ranch like Tom has. He doesn't want to be in California. He's already purchased the land. He's settled it. Ben worked hard and long on that land. He's already named it too. He calls it his Ponderosa. What will happen to his dream if a baby girl is added to the mix? His sons are old enough to handle the struggles they will face. Adam is twelve. Hoss is ten and Little Joe is six. They aren't babies like her. Ben had wives to raise his sons past infancy and well past toddler stage. How can a man raise a baby girl on his own?"_

 _"He's a great father to them boys." Victoria tried to reason with her sister. "He'd treat her like a princess."_

 _Rose listened to the conversation between the sisters. She hated to admit it but she was siding with Lillian on the matter. Tom would be devastated to know his daughter had died. Ben would already be grieving the loss of Lillian, as she seemed to be slowly fading with each word she spoke. For her younger brother, she wanted to not see him grieve if at all possible. She also didn't want to see Victoria fall into another depression and push Tom away as she did with the miscarriages. As far as Rose Barkley was concerned, that only helped in bringing about Tom's affair with Leah Thomson._

 _"Ben would treat her like a princess. I know he's a great father." Lillian whispered with all that was left in her. "But he'd have too hard a time at it. I want my daughter to have a mother to guide her. Ben would do his best but with his plans, would that be enough? And if he'd marry again, would it be for a wife or for a mother for her. I've felt the pain of the reality in not being loved. He treated me kind and doted on me but Ben Cartwright doesn't love me. He loves his children. I don't want another woman to feel that burden. I don't want another woman raising my daughter with resentment that I felt towards Ben's sons. Yes, I treated them as a mother should. But deep inside, I was jealous those boys had mothers who held Ben's heart like I never could. I can't put that on anyone else. I can't allow Ben's dreams to be squashed due to a daughter either. I don't want her to be a burden but a blessing. Make her your blessing, Vicky. I beg you."_

 _"Oh Lillian." Victoria clung to the infant. "I don't know if I can do what you ask of me."_

 _Lillian felt herself slipping away. "Promise me. Promise me that you'll raise that baby as your own."_

 _"I promise." Victoria said as she kissed the baby's forehead. Victoria's own grief of losing a child won out to her internal battle of right and wrong. She longed for this baby to be her own. Therefore, she made the baby her own._

 _"What will you name your daughter, Vicky?" Lillian's lips had dried up and her body could no longer hold her bladder. The smell of death permeated the nostrils of those in the room._

 _Victoria ran her finger over the baby's smooth head. "I will name my daughter Audra."_

Audra stared at her mother knowing she was grieving when she did as her sister begged. Nick and Jarrod stood speechless as they stared in disbelief at their mother as she finished the story.

"You are my daughter, Audra." Victoria spoke with a strained voice. "From the moment Rose placed you in my arms and you began to nurse, you became my daughter. When Tom returned with Ben, I didn't feel guilt of the secret. I never even let it pass in my mind because my heart told me you were my daughter and it was meant to be. Perhaps, it was the grief of a mother losing a child but I never felt you weren't mine from the moment I first laid eyes on you. Even before Lillian requested I become your mother, I felt the love a mother feels for her own."

"Lillian slipped away within minutes of Victoria naming you." Rose added as she placed her hand over Audra's hand. "It was as if she could go in peace knowing that her sister and her daughter would be together as mother and daughter."

"I understand, Mother." Audra stated as she stood up. "I do love you. I do love all of you." Audra turned to look at Nick and Jarrod. Her eyes glistened with still many tears shed and unshed. "I know I'm your daughter and their sister. Forgive me for a moment. I really need to get some air. I need to think." Audra turned to Heath. "Can you please walk with me, Heath?"

"Of course." Heath kissed Victoria's cheek before whispering in her ear. "She'll be fine, Mother. I promise."

"Thank you, Heath." Victoria ran her hand over his cheek.

The family watched as Heath pressed his hand to Audra's back leading her out toward the flower garden. Nick and Jarrod made sure to stay and take care of their mother.

Rose remembered the notion of Heath and Audra from earlier. She thought of the notion again of how Heath and Audra were family secrets. They were two children with the same secret of being hidden from their father. Both secrets she had known. Neither secret did she utter. The notion of how wrong she had been was no longer a notion but a fact. A fact which Rose had been burdened with too long. It felt good to be free of such secrets even if those secrets caused pain as Heath had put it.

 **A/N Thanks again for the support. Soon the story may take a turn some may not like. However, it was planned from the beginning and although I have contemplated changing the story premise due to thinking some may not like what I have in mind, I thought about this being fanfic as one of my reviewers reminded me. (:. So I'm going along with my original concept and not veering from it. Hope all continue to enjoy and review.**


	12. Chapter 12

_Chapter 12: Brothers?_

Heath held Audra as she sobbed in his arms. He didn't know how long they had been in the garden. He didn't really care. Audra needed his comfort. Therefore, she was going to get it. He knew Audra was trying to hide her sadness from her mother. There was no doubt Victoria Barkley loved Audra equally to the children she bore for Tom. Heath knew the depths of love that woman could hold. She loved him as a mother did as well. It often made him thankful for Victoria beyond what she knew. Heath figured he'd let her know somehow how much he appreciated and loved his newfound mother. For now, his concern had to be Audra.

Although, Audra and Heath had not built the brother/sister bond that they had planned. Heath had no doubts that he cared deeply for the beautiful blonde angel crying in his arms. He'd protect her with his life if need be. He knew the pain Audra was feeling because he had felt it a little over a year ago. It had to be worse for the little lady in his arms. She was a spoiled girl. Audra was the Barkley princess. To find out the pain of the truth had to be a severe blow to her emotions. Heath remembered how angry and hurt he felt at the revelation of being Tom Barkley's son. He figured the revelation of not being Tom Barkley's daughter would be an equal if not more devastating discovery.

Audra never said a word as she allowed Heath to hold her. She only took comfort in his strong arms enveloping her. When she pulled back to look into his eyes, she whispered. "Thank you."

"Anything for you, Audra." Heath didn't broach the subject of sister considering Audra was much too sensitive about being called 'sis' by him at the moment.

"I know she did what she thought best. They all did." Audra raked her cheek against Heath's chest. "I still feel that Ben Cartwright should've known. Am I wrong to feel that way? To feel that he had every right to raise me as his daughter or to allow Mother and Father to raise me. Even if it was best what Mother did. Believe me, I can see that it was best the way it happened. But didn't he have that right to decide? Maybe he would've chose me to stay with them anyway. Am I right in this thinking?"

"Of course you are, Audra." Heath pulled her back by her shoulders so she could look at him. "Lillian was right in her thoughts as was Mother. Times back then would've been so difficult for a new infant to make it without a mother, especially a girl. Your real mother was sickly. I'm sure you may have been healthy compared to Anna but I bet you wouldn't have lived without Victoria, our MOTHER, nursing you, caring for you. But Ben still had that right to know of his child, his daughter."

"It is too similar to your mother isn't it, Heath?" Audra's voice was strained due to all the crying.

"The difference is that you got a better life. My mother didn't make that choice. She didn't choose what was best for me. She chose what was best for Tom Barkley and maybe even her. I don't deny my love for my mother nor the love she had for me. But I can't say after thinkin' on your birth, that my own mother chose not what was best for me but what was best for herself or Tom Barkley."

"I'm sorry to make you question your mother, Heath. I never wanted that to happen." Audra closed her eyes as she leaned back into Heath's chest.

Heath's arms went back around Audra as he soothed her once again. "I never wanted any of you to question Tom Barkley either as far as a father to you or a husband to Mother. But you did. As far as my questions about mother, it doesn't matter, Audra. The fact is that I've been questionin' my Mama for a long time. Reckon it doesn't mean the love is different because it's not. But maybe my mother's motives were a little more self centered than I thought or maybe she loved Tom Barkley more than she did her own son."

"Oh no, Heath!" Audra pleaded with him as her fingers twisted in his shirt. "Don't ever think that. There is no doubt you were her life."

"Boy howdy, Audra." Heath chuckled slightly. "I'm supposed to be making you feel better. Not the other way around."

Audra sighed with relief. "We are there for each other now, Heath."

Heath nodded as he kissed the crown of Audra's head. "Do you want to go in? It's getting a might chilly."

"Not right now if that's okay." Audra snuggled closer to Heath to keep the cool crisp air away. "Just hold me a little longer."

"If that's what you want." Heath pulled her closer as he felt her relax in his arms.

Inside the house, Nick was pacing around. The fluster on his face was showing. "Now what do you think is keeping them? It's time they get in this house!"

"Nick, quiet down. Mother and Aunt Rose have finally retired for the night. I had Silas give them both headache medicine to help them sleep." Jarrod took a long sip of brandy. "I don't want your loud roars waking them up."

"Fine. But I have a notion to come dragging Heath and Audra back in here." Nick stopped to glance out the window. He saw the silhouettes of Heath and Audra in the garden. "Look! I can tell she's cold. She needs to get in here. Besides, we're her brothers too. We can help!"

"Jealousy rears its ugly head." Jarrod chuckled as he crossed his feet to prop on the table in front of him.

"What are you talking about?" Nick balled up his fists as he watched Heath comfort his little sister.

"You're jealous that Audra went to Heath with all of this." Jarrod held up his hand before his rambunctious brother could interrupt. "I was too. Trust me. I'm used to being her 'Pappy'. Then I realized that they have much in common due to secrets being kept from them of parentage."

"Oh. Oh yeah. Never looked at it like that." Nick sighed out with a grunt. "Mother was right though and so was Aunt Lillian. I doubt Uncle Ben could've raised a daughter in the harsh conditions he faced. He'd have given up his dream for her or given Audra up. There was no in between on that."

"I agree." Jarrod lit a cigar. "I also think Audra sees it the same. I doubt that makes this situation any less tragic to her at this moment."

Suddenly, Nick saw Audra and Heath making their way back into the house. He quickly scurried to sit down as to pretend he wasn't watching them. Once again, Jarrod chuckled at Nick's antics. Audra was escorted in by Heath.

"I need to talk to my brothers, Heath." Audra informed not only him but Jarrod and Nick.

"Fine." Heath unwrapped his arm from Audra's waist. "If you need me, I'll be right down the hall." Heath tapped his finger to the tip of Audra's nose. "Understand?"

"I do." Audra tiptoed to kiss Heath's cheeks. "I think I'll be fine for tonight. But I would love to go for a ride..." She glanced at Nick and added quickly. "Of course, after you finish work tomorrow."

"Of course." Heath winked before heading upstairs to ready himself for bed.

"Well!" Nick spoke up loudly. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, big brother. I am." Audra smiled genuinely as she made her way to sit on the arm of Nick's chair. "It is a lot to take in. That's all. I still have a lot of unanswered questions."

"Such as?" Jarrod took in a draw of his cigar. "Do tell, little sister."

"I'd like to know about the Cartwrights." Audra spoke as she took in a deep breath. "I won't mention that to Mother right now. I think Mother has had enough to deal with for the time being. That being said, I would like to know about my other family once all this calms down."

"Audra..." Nick stated sadly. His voice was much lower than all around were used to. "You're our sister."

"Of course, I am." Audra took his hand in hers. She looked directly into Nick's grey eyes. "Don't you ever think I feel differently. You're my big brother as is Jarrod and Gene."

"Heath?" Nick swallowed as he wondered why Heath wasn't included in that line of brothers. After all, Heath was Nick's brother without doubts now.

"Heath and I will work on where we stand later." Audra admitted. "We weren't quite bonding as such before this big revelation. However, that is between Heath and I. He understands. By no means does that take from Heath being your brother. He cares a great deal about you and Jarrod. He's working on Eugene being a brother as well. So it isn't me alone that doesn't have Heath's whole heart as far as a sibling."

Audra saw a look of pain and fear cross Nick's face. She giggled slightly.

"What is so funny?" Nick asked impetuously.

"You." Audra glanced at Jarrod, who was also thinking how ironic it was that Nick's concern was for Heath and his relationship among the much more pressing matters of the night. "Heath adores you. I do believe your his...how did you put it, Jarrod?"

"They are both sides of the same coin." Jarrod puffed on his cigar. "Dear sister, now that is established. Heath adores Nick as well as there is no doubt of his thinking of Nick and I as brothers. Nor is there doubt you haven't changed your love for us as a sister. How are you holding up?"

"I'm a mess." Audra admitted as she let out a breath of air. She allowed her shoulders to droop slightly before staring over at her oldest brother. "However, I do know I have a wonderful family to get me through this. Isn't that right, Pappy?"

"Indeed you do, little sister." Jarrod's eyes twinkled as he spoke. "Indeed you do."

 **A/N Again thanks for the reviews.**


	13. Chapter 13

_Chapter 13: Aunt Rose has Left Us_

Rose was smiling from ear to ear when she stepped onto the platform to head back East. The train whistle blew alerting passengers that loading would take place in the next few minutes. Rose glanced at all of the Barkleys. She closed her eyes as she thanked God for her blessings of them all. Secrets were out. Truth was known. Rose hadn't realized how freeing it felt to be rid of the burden of the secrets that plagued her.

"I've enjoyed my time." Rose kissed Victoria on the cheek. She kissed her nephews as well all but Heath. She chuckled and patted his arm. She knew this new family member wasn't quite the 'showing of feelings' type. "You're still a talkative one." She teased.

"I'm so glad you came, Aunt Rose." Audra embraced her aunt lovingly when it was her turn to say her farewell. "I really am."

"Take care of your mother, Dear little Audra." Rose sighed as she looked at her family once more. "You all mean so much to me. Despite how emotional this all was, I am very happy with the way things turned out. Tell Eugene my regards. Next time, he'll have to visit longer."

"We rarely see him ourselves, Rose." Victoria grinned widely. "That boy is so into learning the medical field and sciences, he makes a rare visit on some holidays. We do write often though."

"Well, I'll be off." Rose said as the train whistle blew again. Heath extended his arm to help Rose aboard. "Thank you, Heath."

"You're welcome, Ma'am." Heath said kindly.

"Now. Now. Victoria told me how you called her that too often. I'll take Rose or as I prefer most Aunt Rose. If you see that fitting." Rose said with hopeful eyes.

"I hope to see you again soon, Aunt Rose." Heath smiled lopsidedly.

"Dear Goodness, you do look like your father when you smile. There is no denying how much you took from the Barkley's in looks." Rose and Heath both looked up when Nick spoke loudly to Jarrod about something trivial. Rose glanced back to Heath. "Well, you got the Barkley looks. You have your mother's quiet demeanor."

They both laughed as Rose bid another quick farewell. She felt at ease as she allowed the train to carry her towards home. Her smile reached to her eyes as she dwelled on the lightness she felt. The secrets were finally over. She had burdened herself with those secrets for far too long. Now it was out in the open. Whatever Victoria, Heath, and Audra did with those secrets were up to them now. Rose clutched her satchel to her.

"What is that, Miss?" A small girl asked Rose. The girl was probably six years old with a face full of freckles and deep rust colored hair. Rose thought if she had ever had a child of her own, this girl may be how her child would look. However, Rose still loved the fact she had never married. Most people thought that unmarried woman lived sad lives. The word spinster had been thrown at her many times. Rose only chuckled at that word. She was a lone woman but she was never a lonely woman. She had the Barkley children to keep her from that. She also had the freedom to travel the world as she did often. It was all in the satchel she held to her.

"Emma, don't be nosey." The girls mother told her. The girl's mother had tawny colored hair that seemed drier than a haystack in the middle of August. Despite the woman looking tired, she still seemed to have a pleasant demeanor. "I'm sorry. She's inquisitive like her father."

"We're going to see Papa. He is back East now." The little girl grinned from ear to ear. The girl revealed a snaggle-toothed grin. This cause Rose to brighten even more for some reason.

The mother of the child shared her daughter's enthusiasm. "We tried the West for a few years. Now my husband has found a good job back East. We are excited to return."

"Lovely." Rose chortled. "I'm happy for your family. As far as this old thing.." Rose patted her satchel. "It is my satchel full of my life." She no longer called it her satchel full of truths. It no longer held secrets. It only held memories now.

Rose and the young mother spoke most of the trip . They were getting acquainted as well as making the ride less mundane. The little girl had busied herself with a doll as Rose and the young mother spoke. The subject had went back to her satchel.

"I guess it holds family photos, letters, pretty much my life." Rose admitted proudly. "If anything were to happen to me, it would be the only thing I could pass on. It isn't much as far as worth to any one but family. But I think my sister in law would love the family photos." Rose paused. "And some of the letters."

It was then that Rose pulled out a piece of paper. She wrote something quickly before going back to her conversation. The young woman demised it was another memory to keep record of when she saw Rose stuff it into her satchel. Soon, the sun had went down. Most of the passengers had fallen to sleep by the lull of the train. When the train stopped so that passengers could embark on another train, the little girl went to wake up Rose.

"Miss." The little girl stated. "Miss. We have to get on another train."

The little girl tugged her mother's skirt. "Mama, Rose isn't answering me."

The mother quizzically shook Rose's shoulders. She pulled her little girl to her. "We need to get the conductor."

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Victoria was sitting on the sofa brushing Audra's hair. It was one of the pleasures she had as Audra's mother. Jarrod had left on another train when Rose had to head to San Francisco. He would be working on an impending case. Heath and Nick were rustling up some cattle, which had broken out of some new fencing.

It was a peaceful evening as life began to get back as it was before Rose's visit. Victoria still didn't know of Audra's longing to find out more of the Cartwright family. Heath and Audra had spoken of it. Heath suggested the subject be brought up in a few weeks as 'not to upset the apple cart' any more. Audra had rolled her eyes at his descriptive words but understood him to be correct in them.

The knock on the door caused Victoria to jump slightly at the intrusion. Silas answered the door to see a messenger there.

"I have a telegraph for Victoria Barkley." The young boy stated. Silas took the telegraph and handed the boy a coin before shutting the door.

"Mizz Barkley, a message." Silas handed Victoria the telegraph then left the room.

"What is it, Mother?" Audra questioned. "Is it from Jarrod?"

"No, Darling." Victoria swallowed trying to put away the heartache she was feeling. "Aunt Rose has left us."

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

"Did you telegraph Eugene, Jarrod?" Victoria asked in her quiet demeanor. She was grieving. However, all those that knew Victoria Barkley, knew she'd take care of things no matter her own emotional state. "I think we should fence in a large portion of land there."

"Yes, Mother." Jarrod didn't mind his trip being cut short to San Francisco. The case was a simple one causing a postponement easily acquired. However, the reason for coming back from San Francisco was a sorrowful one.

"Do you mean beside of Father's grave?" Audra dabbed at her swollen red eyes.

Heath was sitting quietly on the arm of Audra's chair. His hand laid on her shoulder for comfort. It seemed he was doing that a lot lately. _Comforting Audra._

Nick was pacing in front of the fire place. It was obvious he was trying to figure out the dimensions of the land needed fenced in around his father's grave. Nick always figured his mother's grave would be beside his father's grave. The children may even be buried there. He didn't expect his mother to want his Aunt buried in the same area. Of course, she still preserved the land directly beside his father for her own grave.

"Let's see. Shall I fence off enough land for all of the children and grandchildren. Should I make it a Barkley graveyard, Mother?" Nick raked his hand over the back of his neck. "I'm not sure what you want, Mother. I know it is morbid. However, should I make it enough for two plots each family member so they have their spouses there too then time comes in future, the children of us be buried out from there. Not, trying to be morbid." Nick reminded his mother. "But I have to make sure I know what you're thinking with burying Aunt Rose there."

"Of course, I always thought I'd be buried beside your father." Victoria sighed. "Tom was more like a son to her than a brother. She helped raise him. Rose would want to be put to rest near him. I'm sure of that. Yes. I'm sure. I think your father would want my resting place beside of his then his children beside of me along with their spouses and so on. So we'll put Rose farther to the East side of your father's grave. Make sure you leave room for all five of his children and any spouse."

"Five?" Heath glanced up from staring at his boots. "I hope you don't count me in that."

"Why not!" Nick belted out. "You're a Barkley!"

"I also have a mother buried in Strawberry." Heath narrowed his eyes on Nick. "There is where Aunt Rachel and eventually Hannah will be buried too. I plan on being buried in Strawberry."

"IN A POTTER'S FIELD!" Nick stopped to stare at Heath defiantly. "YOU'RE A BARKLEY, BOY!"

"I know what I am, Nick." Heath started to stand but stopped when Audra placed her hand on his thigh. She was trying to calm him down. He lowered his voice and curbed his anger. "A potter's field wasn't too good for my mama. Don't reckon it will be too good for her boy."

Victoria saw the hurt in Heath's features. "Make a plot for your Aunt Rose on the East of your father's grave. Leave room as you see fit. We don't need to work out it all right now. I pray there are many more years before we have to worry about who is buried where."

"Yes, Mother." Nick walked by Heath. He placed his hand on Heath's shoulder. "Do you want to help me measure it out, Little Brother?"

Heath nodded as he allowed earlier frustrations to dissipate as quickly as they had came. "Yeah. I'll help you." He stood up. He leaned and kissed Audra's forehead. "Are you okay?"

"Go help, Nick." Audra smiled up at Heath. She whispered. "I'll be here with Mother."

Nick and Heath left the room to take care of the grave site. To both of them, the feeling of working was much more useful than words at times such as these.

"You two are very close now. Aren't you?" Victoria took Audra's hands. "I noticed that before now. He was always there to protect you. Now Heath is special to you because of..." Victoria allowed her words to trail off due to her voice cracking in tears.

"Yes, Mother." Audra squeezed Victoria's hands slightly. "Heath understands. I feel relaxed around him as well as a comfort I can't quite explain."

"I'm glad, Darling. Perhaps, Heath needs that as much as you do. He needs a sibling who understands." Victoria allowed her thoughts to change to Rose. "The day Rose left, I never saw her so happy. I think she was truly happy."

"I do as well, Mother." Jarrod interjected. "She carried a lot of weight from her secrets."

After Jarrod's words, there was a silence that filled the room. It was not a heavy silence but a silence that takes place when memories are being remembered of good times and good people.

 **A/N Thanks for the reading and the reviews**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N I hope this answers the question of Audra and the Cartwrights meeting. Eventually, they will but it will take a while to get there. I hope I'm not going too slow on the story but a lot of things to get through as this is a Heath/Audra story more than a Barkley/Cartwright one. Thanks for the wonderful responses.**

Chapter 14: _I Need Him Too!_

"How are you doing, Audra?" Heath walked up behind Audra. He placed his hands on each of her shoulders then ran his hands up and down her arms.

"I'm fine." Audra leaned back to rest her back against his chest. It seemed to becoming a habit of leaning into Heath for comfort. "I was going to talk to Mother about meeting the Cartwrights. Now, I don't know how to even bring it up with all of this."

The funeral for Rose Barkley had only been three days prior. At the funeral, Heath had fidgeted uncomfortably due to being so near his father's grave. It reminded him of missed years due to him being a secret. It was Audra who noticed Heath's uncomfortable stance. Thus, it was Audra who made her way to try to ease him.

Now they stood alone by the corrals looking at the horses frolicking. A large black stallion pranced around letting the other horses know he was boss. Nick said the horse was unbreakable and not worth the effort Heath was putting into him. However, unbeknown to Nick, Heath had broke him enough for other well trained men to ride. Audra and Heath watched the horse a while in silence.

They both felt a lot like the stallion. Heath felt he had to fight his way onto the Ranch to belong. He had to prove his worth. Audra felt she needed the freedom from the ranch at times. Both unsure of the next step in breeching a gap that was starting to form between the two of them of being familial or of being something different due to the truth of Audra's birth parents.

"I think Ben Cartwright has every right to know, Audra." Coming back to the subject, Heath rubbed up and down Audra's arms. "He's been missing out on a daughter way too long. I know how I wish I had known all of you a lot earlier."

"Especially Nick." Audra teased knowing the closeness the blonde cowboy shared with the dark rancher.

"Yeah." Heath chuckled as he remembered Nick's bellowing out about needing a fence mended a few days ago.

Heath remembered it wasn't much of a need as Nick's way of making it a day of the two of them spending time together in their usual brother routine. Audra and Heath had spent so much time together lately that Nick was missing his blonde brother although Heath had still spent most of his hours with Nick. Even Eugene coming in for the funeral didn't make Nick miss Heath less. Therefore, Heath had spent the last two days fixing a fence that could wait to be mended. Heath had to admit. He had missed Nick as equally as Nick missed him. It was usually just the two of them off buying cattle, working the ranch, or camping somewhere. Now Audra had taken some of Heath's time from Nick for herself. Usually, Audra's time with Heath had been confined to card games or checkers after supper. Now she eagerly awaited for Heath's work day to be over before she latched onto him.

"When do you think I should tell Mother, Heath?" Audra asked as she placed her hands over Heath's hands.

"I was thinkin' that someone needs to ride and get Rose's things from the train depot. Jarrod said he received a telegram from the Canwell Station saying Rose had some things needed picked up. One of the rail workers had noticed the bags and Rose's satchel after a few days. They apologized for not sending her stuff when Rose's body was transported. That station is on the way to Nevada."

Audra snapped around as she stared at Heath. "What are you saying?"

Heath shrugged. "I think you need a trip to clear your head. Is all."

"Nick will throw a hissy fit." Audra stepped away from Heath before perching herself on the corral fence. "Because you have to be the one that goes with me. I don't want the others going. I don't want undue pressure of having to prove anything as I do with the family."

"Eugene is in for a few weeks. His break in classes was coming any way." Heath propped his elbows on the white wooden fence.

Audra grinned revealing her dimples. "I remember him stating he cleared things with the professors in order to come back early and stay on the ranch a while." Audra swung her booted legs slightly in a back and forth pattern. "He seems a little jealous of Nick wanting you around all the time. Eugene was Nick's only little brother before you came and stole Nick away."

"I didn't steal.." Heath chortled slightly. "I guess Eugene could use some time with his big brothers without the newest brother taking up their time. Mother could also use some time to make over Eugene if we go on this trip."

"I think it is a great idea." Audra's smile crept off her face. "But should we tell Mother of our plan to go meet the Cartwrights?"

"That's up to you." Heath tilted his white Stetson hat back. "She'd want to come along to try to explain to Ben Cartwright."

"I don't want her too." Audra admitted. "I don't think I want him to know who I am until I decide. I want to meet him first as a stranger."

"Sometimes that doesn't work out." Heath raised an eyebrow as he winked at Audra. "But I don't suppose one of your Cartwright brothers is going to drag you out of bed to beat out the truth from you."

"True." Audra, with the help of Heath, got down from the fence. She kissed Heath's cheek. "I'm terrified but so excited."

Eugene had been watching from the window in the house. Heath and Audra seemed very close. Eugene also had noticed Nick brooding when Heath wasn't around. Jarrod was close to the new brother as well. However, it was more like a brother relationship than it was the "Pappy" persona he had with the other Barkley children.

Nick's relationship with Heath seemed special. They bonded as brothers but also as best friends. Eugene even noticed that his mother was drawn to Heath as if he were her own son. However, Audra and Heath were different compared to how she was with each of her other brothers. They seemed to also share a special bond even if he couldn't quite think of what the bond was.

"It's their shared secrets." Victoria touched her youngest son's arm.

"What?" Eugene still kept his eyes on his sister and brother.

"They're close due to similar shared secrets." Victoria's voice cracked slightly. The family had already revealed to Eugene of Audra's birth. Eugene reassured Audra that she was still his pesky little sister.

"Oh. That's what it is." Eugene allowed the information to sink in. "Heath seems extra protective of Audra's feelings."

"He knows what it feels like. Heath fears she is hurting as he did." Victoria squeezed Eugene's upper arm. "She doesn't though. I can tell. Her life was full of love and joy of a family. Heath had more painful than good times. Oh but that boy was loved by his mother. Sometimes, love doesn't take away all the pain though."

Eugene and Victoria settled down after walking back into the house. Nick came in bellowing out that he was starved. Jarrod came in from the study stating in a much lower voice that he could use some food too.

Before long, all the Barkleys were gathered around the dinner table. Audra glanced over at Heath, who was at her side. To give her encouragement, he secretly squeezed her hand under the table.

"Mother, I'd like to go get Rose's things from the depot." Audra spoke up quickly fearing she would let it slide if she didn't.

"Excuse me." Jarrod narrowed his eyes on his little sister. "The depot can send her items. I've already told them it would be easier that way. Why buy a train ticket to only go after what they can send for free? It was the train station's fault."

"Please, Mother." Audra begged ignoring Jarrod's remark. "They haven't had time to send her items. I really..no I desperately need to get away from here a while. I need to think about things." She could see her mother look at her worriedly. "Oh, Mother, it's not a sad thing. I just need to have some time. I don't want a train ticket. I want to take a stage coach and horses for part of the ride."

"Now wait a cotton pickin' minute!" Nick bellowed. "That's a long trip! It is a dangerous one too. NO way is my little sister going to take a trip like that! NO WAY!"

"I was planning on ridin' with her." Heath grimaced knowing the next words to come from Nick's mouth. However, he went right back to eating.

"NOT HAPPENIN', BOY!" Nick stood up and threw down his napkin. "I need you on the ranch with me!" Nick didn't men the last part to come out. He lowered his voice slightly. "I mean I need you on this ranch."

"You meant what you said the first time!" Audra stood up in the same manner as Nick. She had her hands placed on the table angrily. "You only want Heath all to yourself! I need him too, Nick!"

Eugene watched with a furrowed brow as his sister and brother fought over Heath's time. He glanced at Jarrod then to his mother. Both seemed to be rolling their eyes at the outbursts. Then he looked at Heath, who was eating his food as if there was nothing going on. Heath looked up at Eugene and winked then nodded his head towards Nick.

Eugene took it as a hidden cue from Heath. "I could help with the ranch while they're gone." Eugene realized that Heath must have caught on to his jealousy of Nick's and Heath's close relationship. Heath realized that Eugene needed time with Nick too. "I'd really like to spend some time with my big brother out on the range like we used to, Nick."

"Well. I would like that too." Nick settled down back to his seat. He grunted still not liking the idea of his little sister traveling on an unneeded trip. He was even more irate that she was taking his blonde brother away with her.

"Mother, may I?" Audra bit her lip anxiously before continuing. "Heath will be right there. We can take the train there. We'd ride most of the way back on the train too. But I want some time on the horses." She glanced at Nick. "I've been to Rome, Nick. I think I can travel across country without getting into too much trouble. Besides, Heath **will** be with me."

"I think it would be a lovely trip for you, Audra." Victoria squeezed her hand. "I think we could all use a break from the tension. You don't mind going with her, Heath?"

"Not at all, Mother."" He stated before looking at Nick. "I got the unbreakable stallion broke. The rest the men can handle."

"I can help break some." Eugene said doubtingly. He had never helped break the horses.

"Not like Heath." Nick pouted. Then he added quickly so not to hurt Eugene's feelings. "None of the men, and that includes me, can break a wild horse like Heath. But you don't have to. I need you working with me on some branding."

"It's settled." Jarrod spoke up. "I'll ride into town first thing in the morning to make sure the station keeps Aunt Rose's things."

"When do you plan on leaving, Audra?" Victoria hated to see Audra leave. However, Victoria also needed a break from the tension of worry that had built around them since Audra knowing the events of her birth.

"I'd like to leave first thing in the morning. Right after breakfast." Audra beamed.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N I know this is a filler chapter but I can't resist writing for my next favorite Barkley (NICK). Of course, Heath is favorite but love the character of Nick. So here is a little brotherly love. Plus it does come in handy to explain other things that happen later concerning Nick and Heath. I need to show their closeness for readers to understand future posts. Therefore, I may put in a chapter here and there of my favorite brothers.**

 _Chapter 15: A Brother's Friend_

The bright morning brought on a cheerful atmosphere in the Barkley household. Everyone seemed to be in the best of moods with the exception of Nick Barkley. The tall handsome man's dark attire didn't tell of his large personality, which was only rivaled by his larger heart. Of course, Heath had often teased if Nick were to wear clothing that matched his bigger than life personality, he'd be wearing clothes too bright for the range.

Nick Barkley was pouting and grumbling from the moment he tried to beat Heath up in the morning. He wanted a few hours alone with his quiet blonde brother. Alas, that didn't happen as Heath had already done a multitude of chores before he set out for the long journey with Audra. Heath didn't want to leave not showing Nick he would pull his own weight. Nick shook his head as he saw the young cowboy feeding and caressing the newest broke stallion in the corral. A smile broke across Nick's face as he had realized he had baited the blonde into making sure the stallion was broke. Nick knew his younger brother's pride wouldn't let a challenge escape him. Therefore, Nick had stated that the horse was unbreakable. He knew if any one could break that prideful, stubborn stallion it would be his more prideful, stubborn younger brother.

"You're going to spoil him like you do Charger." Nick teased as he stepped up to the corral fence.

"Don't hurt treatin' him good." Heath rubbed the horse's nose gentle before glancing over at Nick. "What are you going to do with him?"

"Breed him. He's worth to much to let him go for the price I'd catch around here. Unless you want him." Nick ran his hand behind his neck.

He was feeling the ache of a barroom brawl. Last night, he and Heath had went into town for much needed brother bonding. As usual, a bar fight broke out due to Nick's mouth. Heath backed up his brother as usual. Now Nick felt the worse of it. He often wondered how Heath seemed to mend too quickly after any hurt he got. He supposed it was youth aided with stubbornness. However, Nick knew it was probably not healing more than being used to pain in the body. His little brother had sure been through enough in his short lifetime.

"Naw. I have Charger. I was thinkin' maybe he could be Eugene's horse." Heath breathed out. After a year on the ranch, he still felt he needed Nick's permission on things. "He always rides any of the horses when he comes in. He doesn't have one of his own."

Nick nodded as he spoke. "He never was like me or you, Heath. He's more like Jarrod."

"Still. A man could use his own horse. Jarrod has Jingo." Heath scratched the horse's chin. "This is a mighty fine one. Almost as good a Charger." Heath grinned lopsidely. "Almost."

"He used to have one but he gave him to a friend when he went off to the university in Berkley. Can't even remember the friend's name. Horses aren't that important to him." Nick blew out air. "Don't want him giving away a horse like this."

Heath couldn't understand how a horse couldn't be of utmost importance to a man. A horse should come right after family as far as Heath was concerned. Therefore, he pressed on.

"Then you should give it to him as a gift." Heath went towards the corral. He called back over his shoulder. "He'd keep it here on the ranch for when he comes in. That's for certain if a big brother were to give a gift to a little brother."

Nick felt his heart leap. He knew Heath was referring to the gift of Charger from him to Heath. The boy was 'a might proud', as Heath had put it, of the horse because Nick gave it to him. Of course, Heath had broke the horse. After that, Charger wasn't about to let any other man be his owner like Heath was. It was a horse that Nick had set his own sights on but knew his brother would treasure the gift.

Jarrod had watched the exchange from the opening in the barn. He too had tried to wake before his little brother for some conversation. He wanted to make sure Heath knew to let the family know Audra and he would make it alright. He also suspicioned the trip was far less about Rose's belongings than Audra's curiosity of a family not yet met. Jarrod didn't blame Audra or Heath for keeping their plans secretive. They wanted to spare their mother the worry of it. Victoria was still feeling unease at the secret and grief from Rose's death. The woman was stressed more than usual. Jarrod hadn't seen his mother in such a state since the death of his father.

"Heath wants Eugene feeling like he hasn't took over his place with you." Jarrod stepped up to Nick. He was trying to prevent his loud brother from following after Heath.

"Excuse me?" Nick settled back against the fence trying to fight the itch to follow his blonde brother rather than stay and chat with his lawyer brother.

"Heath is trying..." Jarrod started to repeat.

"I know what you said. That's silly." Nick fidgeted with his belt loops as he rocked back on forth on his boot heels. "Eugene can't be replaced."

"Certainly true, Brother Nick." Jarrod interjected. "Heath just wants to make sure that Eugene knows that. After all, my boisterous brother and my quiet brother seemed to be joined at the hip now."

"Well. It's different with Heath." Nick admitted in a lower than normal voice. "I can't tell you why. It is as if Father sent him to me to make sure I could get on without him. You and Eugene were always the ones who wanted the book learning and more than this ranch. Heath wants this as much as I do."

"You don't have to explain that to me, Nick." Jarrod laughed with a wink. "There was never a time when I felt threatened by Heath's presence. However, a little brother being gone for months at a time could feel a little envy at a new brother saddling up to you so fast. Eugene always tried to please us both. He probably feels he's let you down as much as I used to feel with father over my choices. Eugene always did want to please us both and always felt stretched in the middle of us."

"That's why Heath wants me to give the horse to him." Nick shook his head. "That boy is always watching out for all of us. Don't you see, Jarrod? I want to be the one watching out for him. He's my brother. One I ran off and couldn't accept at first. Heath , well, he's special."

"I know." Jarrod gripped Nick's shoulder. "That is obvious of how you both are towards one another. Heath would follow you to h#ll and back."

"I don't want to lose him." Nick admitted as he ran his hands through his dark tresses. "I found him. Now I wake up in the middle of the night checking to see if the boy is still there. I thought I'd get over that after a few weeks. But I still check if he's there and breathing while he sleeps."

"You nursed him through those nightmares when he first arrived." Jarrod leaned up against the railing of the corral. "That boy did fight you off from doing that at first. But Heath finally got used to you being there when he woke up screaming."

"You knew about those nights?" Nick glanced over at his older brother in surprise.

"Yes. I did indeed. Mother did as well. We often tried to make our way to him only to find you already there holding him to you and reassuring him that." Pausing, Jarrod drew in a deep breath of the morning cold air. "That he was home now."

"Well, he sleeps alone on some trips. He stays in hotels alone on others. No one knows of his nightmares that still come at times." Nick balled up his fists thinking of Heath struggling so much with the nightmares after going to the lumber camp with the foreman, who tortured the boy in his youth. "Matt Bentell was lucky I let him live the more I think of it. Glad we rid us of that man. Any way, my fear is him being with Audra on this trip. What if he has one of his nightmares?"

"And your not the one there to help him?" Jarrod took a cigar from his pocket. "He's lived long enough without you there to get him through those."

"That's just it, Jarrod." Nick slapped his leg angrily with back of his black glove. "I don't want him going it alone. I sure as h#ll don't want Heath being ashamed waking with Audra asking him about them. It is something I had to pry from him. He don't want people knowing his fears. Our sister and her silly notion of taking the horses on part of the journey. They'll be camping out. "

"Heath knows how to handle the nightmares. Audra will not know of them if Heath doesn't want her to. Besides, he knows he'll come home to exercise those demons with you, Nick." Jarrod pulled another cigar from his pocket handing it to Nick. "You are your brother's friend."

 **Note: Thanks again for the responses. As always, it is greatly appreciated. Next chapter: Heath and Audra on the way to Canwell Train Station.**


	16. Chapter 16

_Chapter 16: Staking a Claim_

Heath and Audra were well on their way to collect Rose Barkley's things from the Canwell Station. Charger and another Barkley horse had been loaded carefully into the animal car while Audra and Heath had settled down in the private train car of the Barkley's. Heath thought it was a ridiculous idea to take their own train car.

"Same track. Same train. Means we'll arrive same time." Heath stated as he shook his head at the impressive train car. "Don't make no sense to me not buying a plain ole ticket."

However, Jarrod had insisted due to his lovely little sister going along. He added in a teasing manner. "Now, Heath. It will not hurt to enjoy the finer things in life once in a while. After all, you are a Barkley."

"Big ole waste of money" Heath had stated before he reluctantly climbed aboard. Everyone knew the young man preferred horse trails to railroad tracks any day.

Audra had laughed at Heath's slight complaining but still boarded the train gleefully. She was feeling both excited and anxious for the adventure ahead. The first night, Heath fell asleep without much effort. He was tired putting in more than needed effort on the ranch before he left. Besides, Audra's constant nervous chatter made Heath prefer slumber over her excited utterances.

However, Audra had a problem in obtaining the same peaceful sleep. Nervousness had far outweighed excitement when it came to the fact of meeting the Cartwrights. Therefore, the second night on the train, Audra had an impromptu party in their private car with some of the other passengers joining in on the fun. The train wasn't that full of passengers. Therefore, a lot of the passengers were more than glad to partake in the Barkley generosity. Unfortunately, the good came with the bad when it came to an impromptu party.

As always Heath kept a protective eye on Audra as many a male vied for her attention. He did not see one man in the whole lot worthy of Audra's time. However, the girl did seem to be enjoying the attention from all her guests. The men were smitten. The females were envious but in a good way. Audra was a fine hostess making sure every one was having a good time and plenty of food and beverages. Heath often wondered how the others did it. He couldn't see wasting so much money on frivolities. He didn't blame his other siblings for it though. That was why Tom Barkley worked so hard in his life time. He wanted the best for his children. Heath often wondered if Tom Barkley would feel the same of him if he knew Heath had shown up. Heath shook those thoughts from his head as to keep an eye on Audra just in case something were to go awry.

"Is she yours?" A brawny man asked as he pushed back his fading hat. He nodded over to where Audra was charming yet another male passenger.

"Excuse me?" Heath allowed his eyebrow to arch slightly as he looked up at the large man in front of him. He made his contempt clear on the subject."I don't think she belongs to anyone. She's her own person."

"Name's Esau." The large man stuck out his hand to shake Heath's hand before sitting down beside him. Heath extended his hand taking the hand offered. He then waited for Esau's answer. "Well, a man might want to lay claim to her. Not trying to be a pain, Mr. Barkley." The man sighed out watching Heath furrowing his brow. "I only know your name because this is a private car. You carry yourself like you own it."

Heath started to say that his family owned it but he decided against setting himself aside from ownership. It was his as it was theirs. "Yep. You got that notion correct."

Esau nodded before adding. "I ain't much for trains but had to come along with my boss. He's on some business thing and I have to help with some horse buying." The man explained himself. He cleared his throat. "Iffen you take my suggestion, you may want to lay claim to her. The pretty filly has been braggin' about going the Nevada way. There's some rough terrain that the train don't travel. A man might want to make someone like that his own. That's all I'm sayin'. Just a warnin'."

Heath crossed his feet at the ankles as he settled back. He peered over at Esau. "Sayin' she's my sister?"

"Well, that's too bad. Cause a man wouldn't care none to rid a fella of his sister but might think different from takin' a man's wife."

Heath nodded his understanding. "No worries then, that filly is my wife."

"Thought so. That's what I was tellin' the Johnsons from Akinville. Two of them boys are travelin' with my boss to help bring home some new horse flesh." The brawny man peered at Heath. "Them there boys say they think they might know you. You think they do?"

Heath's mouth became dry at the mention of Johnsons. It wasn't so much the last name as Johnson was a fairly common surname. It was the place that connected with that name that caused Heath some trepidation . "I know of them."

"Feared so. They said you whooped up on their older brother bad once over some female." Esau scratched his scruffy chin. "The way they figure is if you don't own her in marriage, she's theirs for the takin' just like you took a female from their brother once. Don't say I agree with their thinkin' on females but lots of men in the wild parts of the country believe just that."

"I know how that set of Johnsons view women." Heath's face showed no emotion as he stared at Esau. "But I'll kill for what's mine. After all, man's wife is his own. I know their Pap taught them that even if he didn't teach the boys to have respect for a lady. They were taught to respect a man for the female that belonged to him."

"That's right. That's what I gathered to." Esau stood up then scratched under his chin. "She is a might pretty filly. Glad she's spoken for."

Heath nodded his gratitude. He then watched as Audra danced gleefully with another young male. Heath peered around as he tried to find a familiar face in the crowd of passengers. It had been over five years ago that Heath had set foot in Akinsville but he recognized the Johnsons immediately. Mathew was five years older than Heath and Jacob came a year under him. Both boys stood tall like all the Johnson boys. They were far from good looking. Most of the boys were larger than their frames told they should be due to eating plenty. Paul Johnson's sons had his features of rusty red hair and crooked noses. If you saw one Johnson boy, you seen them all. The Johnsons were known for sons but a daughter was never born in their offspring. Heath wasn't sure if out of the ten Johnson brothers, if any had married for love. He doubted it as most of were taught women were below a dog and above a flea. Three of the ten Johnson boys had wives, who were taken rather than giving permission. Heath noticed that Jacob and Matthew were staring over at him as Esau spoke to them.

Heath stood up and made his way to Audra. He took her by the arm. Then he proceeded to pull her away from her many admirers.

"Heath, I was having fun." Audra jerked her arm from his hand's grip. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Alright folks!" Heath yelled over the crowd ignoring Audra's question. "Party is over. We've had enough fun for today. Sorry but time to clear out of **my** car. Take all the food you want as you go."

There were lots of murmurs of disappointment as people grabbed up some food as they went. Audra pouted as she left in a huff to the back of the Barkley car. She angrily pulled the curtain separating the car from the sleeping area. Esau stayed behind as well as Jacob and Matthew Johnson. They strode up to Heath grabbing a few pieces of fruit as they went.

"You need to control that woman of yours, Heath." Jacob Johnson nodded to Audra as she exited. "No woman of mine would act that way."

"Don't guess they would, Jacob." Heath placed his hand on his gun belt. "She's learnin'. My wife has a wild streak because of her upbringin'. She's kinda a spoilt colt. I'll make sure she knows her place."

"How'd you get a filly that perty and refined?" Crossing his arms over his chest, Matthew Johnson asked.

"Haven't you heard the talk?" Esau interjected. "You're talking to Heath Barkley as in the Stockton Barkleys."

"You're a Barkley!" Jacob slapped his knee. "A mongrel pup like you?"

"Ain't it something when a rich man travels what he may leave behind in his journey. Tom Barkley is just like any old dog when it comes to leaving a mongrel pup behind." Heath glared at Jacob letting him know he was Tom Barkley's illegitimate son. "I guess a refined woman like my wife don't mind a mongrel pup as long as that pup can afford her fancy things. No matter. She's mine. That's all there is to it. As I told Esau, I'd kill for what's mine."

"Now don't get your fingers itchin', Heath." Matthew placed his hand on his younger brother's shoulder. "I know how fast you were as a boy when it comes to using a side iron. Don't figure none of us wantin' to take you on as a man. Besides, we respect a man's property."

Heath nodded as the men walked from the private train car back to the regular passenger car. Putting his feet on a nearby table top, Heath settled back into his seat. There was no use getting too comfortable. He'd have to make sure Audra stayed put until they rid themselves of the Johnson brothers.

 **A/N Thanks for the responses.**


	17. Chapter 17

_Chapter 17: Rough Road Ahead_

The sound of the train whistle blowing brought Heath out of his fitful sleep. The night before, Heath was on a constant vigil making sure his little sister remained safe. He turned his body to glance out the window to gage the time. There was a little amber in the bottom of the black sky. The way Heath figured it, the hour was probably around 4 am.

Heath scratched his chin realizing he could use a shave. He'd have to get one as soon as they stopped and settled at Canwell Station. The whistle alerted the passengers they were close to the destination. Heath figured they could stay a night at the hotel before taking a stage coach further towards Nevada. There was a track that traveled that way but traveling that was not possible due to stopping. The train would've lead them much closer to the Cartwright ranch if not for having to stop at Canwell. Because of the stop, the next trip out by train would be a week or more. A stage coach would have to do. Heath wanted to wait as long as possible to take the horses. Not only would the last leg of the trip require horseback, he worried about saddle sores. Audra also insisted they take their time getting there. Also, she wanted to stop in one of the shops in Canwell.

If Heath had been traveling alone, he'd bed down out in the wild. Heath didn't figure Audra would care to bed down out in the open. Sure the girl had camped with her family. However, a planned camping trip was a lot different then laying your head where you could find a place to lay it.

Heath stood up gathering his things to get ready for departing the train. He heard Audra doing the same. It would take her twice as long to do half the work, Heath thought with a smirk. The girl sure did appreciate looking fine.

By the time the train pulled into the station, Audra was still primping to get ready to get of the train. By this time, Heath was getting more than agitated with her. The young blonde hated being idle. It wasn't in his making not to be doing something when something needed done. He couldn't leave her while he checked on Rose's things due to the Johnson boys still being aboard. The Johnsons would continue to take the train towards Akinville, which was the next stop. At least, the Johnsons would be out of their hair once off the train.

Heath knocked on the side of the private car wall, which was near the sleeping area.

"Dad blame it, Sis." Heath stated in his low drawl. "I'm ready to get off this train. What is takin' you so long?"

Audra huffed behind the curtain before pulling it angrily open. "I wanted to wear my new dress!"

"So. Looks like you got it on. Let's go." Heath shook his head. "You take longer than a tadpole turning into a frog."

Audra narrowed her eyes on Heath. "I'm not talking to you after how you treated me last night!" She pulled the curtain closed quickly.

Heath wiped his brow before stuffing his white Stetson back on his head. He ordered in a low voice. "Come on. The first train whistle warned for departure."

Audra opened the curtain. She stuck her head out shyly. "I can't! The dress has some buttons in the back I can't get to."

"Thought you weren't talkin' to me." Heath quipped before leaning back placidly on the wall. "Wear another dress without buttons up the back."

"NO! I bought this for this stop! I have one more special dress for when I meet Ben Cartwright. The rest are plain." Audra argued with a defiance Heath knew well. Barkley stubbornness could be a blessing or a curse. In Audra's case, it seemed to be more of a curse.

Heath doubted Audra had anything plain in her dresses for traveling. Plain wasn't the girl's style. Nothing about Audra Barkley screamed plain. His thoughts were interrupted when the train whistle warned of all needed to depart or get on depending on the case. The Barkley train car would be locked up but continue until the end of the line in Nevada. It was decided that the ride back would be mostly by train as there was no need to stop. Therefore, Heath sent the car on for that purpose.

Audra bit her lip as she crossed her arms defiantly over her chest. Heath had waited over an hour for Audra to get ready. He was hungry and tired from the night of little sleep. Without giving it much thought, he rolled his eyes before spinning her around by her shoulders. He started buttoning her dress.

"Smallest buttons I ever saw." Heath complained as his thick fingers fumbled with the small clothed buttons. His hurried pace not pausing to think of how inappropriate his actions were. He had often helped his mama button up or unbutton when she was too tired to do so on her own. From an early age, Heath had helped his mama into bed when her body couldn't do it on her own.

Audra could feel her face flaming hot with embarrassment. Although nothing showed but her upper slip, she still wasn't used to a man touching her in such a manner no matter how innocent it was. _It is my brother_. Audra tried to remind herself. But somehow, that didn't help with her shame of the situation. Brothers didn't help sisters dress anyway.

"There." Heath spun her back around once he was finished. "Now, let's go."

"I'm still not talking to you." Audra huffed out before pushing past Heath.

"Good. I need the rest and your constant chatterin can give a man a mighty headache." Heath quipped back with an indignant reply. However, Audra didn't hear due to it being a low whisper.

Audra turned back around swishing the skirts of her new dress. "What did you say?"

"There you go again not talkin' to me." Heath knew that would get the girl moving even it was an angry movement.

Matthew Johnson watched as Audra pushed past him followed by a smirking Heath. He grabbed at Heath's shoulder. "You've got you a wild cat by the tail with that one, Heath."

"Yep." Heath agreed before pulling his shoulder free from Matthew's grasp. "She's worth it."

"I can't argue there. She's purrtier than a rainbow after a thunderstorm." Matthew watched as Audra pointed out to the luggage boy which luggage was hers. "But she sure does have an eye for costly things."

"Like I said." Heath nodded his head with the tip of hat. "She's worth it."

Heath stepped down from the train and headed towards Audra. For show to Matthew Johnson, Heath kissed Audra's cheek. He whispered in her ear, knowing the words would curb her anger but have Matthew thinking it was a husband's utterance to his wife. "You do look beautiful in that dress."

Audra turned and threw her arms around Heath's neck. "I don't like being mad at you."

Matthew shook his head at the luck of Heath. First he got one of the most honored names in California with Barkley then he got the prettiest girl Matthew had ever laid eyes on. Didn't seem fair for a b st rd colt to be so lucky in life when the Johnsons had nothing but bad luck following them. With envy pulling at him, Matthew stepped back in the train as he watched the fair haired beauty fawning over Heath.

Heath didn't like the way Matthew Johnson continued to stare at Audra as the train pulled away. Heath was glad they were rid of the Johnsons.

"Let's get a room then get a nice breakfast. How about it?"

"Yes, I'd like that." Audra sighed out relief allowing her anger to dissipate due to the treatment of the night before. She figured he was always so cautious when on trips. Nick had said how the boy stayed on high alert all the time when on cattle drives. Audra guessed Heath didn't mean to be so bossy. She had overheard a conversation between Nick and Jarrod about Heath's lack of sleep at times due to his past at Carterson Prison. Audra hoped that wasn't the case last night. She wouldn't want him worrying over having a nightmare around her. She'd understand and help him if need be.

Another few minutes, Heath and Audra were waiting on the depot worker to find Rose's belongings before heading to the hotel and breakfast. There was some confusion that prolonged their track to the hotel.

The train depot manager, a short portly man, raked his hand over his balding head. "I'm sorry, Mr. Barkley. There was a misunderstanding with the telegraph. Our new worker thought when it said not to send the belongings to the Barkley Ranch in Stockton, he was to send the belongings to the other address. The one penned by Miss Rose Barkley in our ledger."

Heath sighed out. "Fine. I'll see what my brother wants to happen from here. What about her satchel?"

"That was sent the same place." The man said apologetically. "I wish I had handled it myself. Jeffrey is new to things."

"It's fine." Heath assured the man before heading back to Audra.

There were already a few young men speaking to her with obvious admiration. Audra had a flirty air about her that came with ease. It wasn't too forward to be any thing near unlady like. However, it did make a man smitten within minutes of her soft voice coming out.

"That girl doesn't even know her powers." Heath said under his breath. He shook his head as he headed towards her. "This trip is going to be nothing but a headache."

It was one thing to be on the ranch comforting Audra as he had been. It was another watching Audra in a world she knew little about. Heath's protective side was feeling a prickle as well as an unfamiliar feeling of seeing Audra with male admirers around her. Heath figured it was another feeling of being her protector and another price of being her brother. Heath figured it was going to be a rough road ahead.

 **A/N The satchel will no longer play in this story. It is used in a story that is something of a sequel to this I am writing called _Leah's Letters_. It will be a Heath story explaining his life before the Barkleys.**


	18. Chapter 18

_Chapter 18: Mind Your Place_

The small diner held little atmosphere. The stained yellow wall paper had burnt orange pattern of roses throughout. The café was old but very clean with the table linens a pale yellow. At one time, the walls had matched the pale yellow color. However, years of dust had caused the paper to yellow despite the owners trying to keep the establishment clean for the customers. Heath and Audra were among a few other customers sitting down for breakfast. Most of the people were trying to mind their own business. However, a few did notice the gorgeous couple when they walked in. Audra and Heath were both very easy on the eyes. It made people notice and become intrigued.

Heath had on his customary tan pants with salmon colored shirt. His darker brown vest was pulled on over the ensemble. He didn't wear his handkerchief around his neck as he wouldn't be sweating like he did on the ranch. He felt a little undressed sitting across from Audra. Her dress was a deep sapphire blue with a small trim of white satin. The neck line plunged slightly but not enough to reveal more than a hint of cleavage. The bodice was tight accentuating Audra's small waist. Audra's hair was pulled to a side pony tail. Heath had never seen Audra wear her hair like that. It fit her as it made a person take note of her face rather than her gorgeous blonde hair.

Heath glanced over his breakfast noticing Audra stirring her eggs without taking a bite. "Not to your likin'?"

Audra glanced up with a puzzled look on her face. "What?"

Heath smiled lightly as he pointed his finger to the untouched eggs on her plate. "Breakfast. Tastes fine to me. But then again, I can eat almost anything. What's wrong, Sis?"

Audra pushed back her blonde locks of hair over her shoulder. Her sapphire blue dress brought out the softness of her eyes. Heath smiled lightly at how truly beautiful Audra was. She smiled weakly as she bit her lip.

"Worried about what I'm doing going to the Cartwrights without Mother."

"We don't have to go." Heath pushed back his plate as he placed his hand on hers. "It's up to you. I'll do whatever you want."

"I want to go." Audra stated quickly before squeezing Heath's calloused hand. "I guess I'm afraid. Were you afraid coming to us?"

"Boy Howdy, I was." Heath smirked lopsidedly. "Still didn't stop me from wonderin' about the family that was mine."

"I'm glad you didn't stop." Audra sighed as she stared over at the handsome blonde cowboy. "Very glad."

"Me too, Audra. I'm sure Mr. Cartwright and those Cartwright brothers of yours will feel the same way." Heath let go of Audra's hand. "I bet they'll accept you a whole lot more than my reception."

"We all gave you a rough time." Audra couldn't help but to release a nervous chuckle.

"Except Mother. The one I expected to resent me the most, accepted me without question." Heath began to eat again.

"But the one that resented you the most is the one who you've bonded with the most. Nick would crawl through broken glass for you, Heath."

"I'd do the same for him. Shoot, Sis. I love you all." Heath stated with sincerity. "I know it has been so little time with you all. But Boy Howdy, I can't ask for better folks to be called family."

The rest of breakfast was continued with talk about horses, fathers, family and life in general. Heath didn't think to mention to Audra about pretending she was his wife. That became something he regretted when he got back to the hotel.

Matthew Johnson and Jacob Johnson outside of the hotel. Jacob rubbed his chin as he looked to his older brother. "Why are we here, Matt?"

"Because the conductor found out we hadn't paid for a ticket, Jacob? Remember?" Matthew answered angrily. "I told you not to go spending money that weren't ours. Not only did we lose a job but we lost our way home."

"Shoot. Ain't nothing to make it to Akinville. I have enough for a horse. What I can't figure out is why we're standing near this hotel for. We don't have money enough for a hotel stay if we get a horse. We need a horse more. We should just go on towards Akinville. We can sleep on the way. We still have a bedroll between us."

"I'm just curious is all." Matthew sighed out. "I'm gonna make sure that Heath really has that woman he claims. It just don't seem right a mongrel getting a fine thoroughbred like her."

"Pa taught us to respect a man's property, Matt." Jacob warned as he thrust his finger into Matthew's chest. "Iffin she wasn't Heath's, I'd be making her mine. Take her into marriage."

"Iffin she didn't belong to Heath, I'd take her." Matthew glared at his brother. "I guess we'd fight it out. But she's Heath's."

"Yep. So why do we care where they lay their heads for the night." Jacob grunted out. "If that thoroughbred wants to ride a mustang, let her. We can't take what's not ours. We don't steal another man's property."

It seemed ironic coming from him considering they had spent another man's money. However, Esau did give them money telling them to purchase two tickets for themselves. The Johnsons figured it was their business if they chanced not getting a ticket.

"I know that." Matthew shrugged. "I'm just curious if that girl wants Heath at all. She doesn't really act like no wife should. Is it my fault if she decides to stray on the boy? Maybe she'd prefer a man like ourselves. I'd put my wife in her place. Heath is givin' that girl a little too much reign if you ask me."

"Yeah. I agree with you there. She does need her cinch tightened." Jacob nodded towards a few shops a few yards down. "Speakin' of which. Here comes that purty thing now."

Audra linked her arm in Heath's as they walked towards the hotel. "I can go to the rooms while you send a telegraph to Jarrod about Aunt Rose's belongings."

"Fine. Just don't get yourself in trouble." Heath kissed Audra's cheek before leaving her. He called back. "I'll be there shortly."

Audra didn't notice the two red headed men staring at her. She was too preoccupied with the dresses in the shop window on the way to the hotel. The Johnson boys walked away from the hotel when spying Audra. Jacob elbowed Matthew whispering that he wanted to just talk to Heath's wife. He wanted to get a close up of the girl just because of how pretty she was.

"Mornin', Mam." Jacob tipped his hat knowing a fine thing like her would like pleasantries. Matthew nodded to Audra as well.

"Good morning." Audra smiled cordially before turning back to the window. She was admiring a pale green shawl. It's intricate lace played well off of the knitted pattern. It would make her mother a lovely gift upon returning to the ranch. Perhaps, it could serve as a peace offering for the anger that this adventure was sure to incur.

"Anything in there would look a might purty on you." Matthew didn't think it would go against his raisings to at least flirt with Heath's filly. After all, he had seen her on the train flirting with other men right in front of Heath.

"Thank you." Audra again gave a cordial smile. "I'm looking for my mother. But I do appreciate the compliment." Audra then nodded her head. "I guess I better get to the hotel."

"My name is Matthew Johnson." Matthew stepped in front of her wanting to get one last look at the beauty that was Audra. "This is younger brother Jacob."

Audra again answered politely not wanting to cause a scene. She knew Heath was close if these two men kept up their obvious advances. Besides, the streets were crowded. She felt in no immediate danger. "I'm Audrey Barkley. I hate to be rude but I must meet my brother at the hotel soon."

"Brother?" Jacob frowned as he allowed his eyebrows to furrow. "Heath is your brother?"

"Do you know him?" Audra asked curiously.

"We know Heath Barkley from a long time ago. Before he had a last name. No less the name of a Barkley. We spoke on the train at your party. But he told us on the train you weren't his sister." Matthew stepped closer to Audra. Was the girl denying her husband due to her free spirit or was Heath lying about her?

Audra gasped with an angry growl. "Well, did he?" She figured Heath wasn't claiming her as his sister due to not sharing the blood of a Barkley. It caused her anger to fuel.

Heath came out of the telegraph office to see Audra conversing with the Johnson brothers. He felt his gut tighten with worry. He sprinted up to the them quickly. He grabbed Audra's arm.

"Hey, boys." Heath pulled Audra protectively to him. "It think we better head to the hotel."

Audra pulled from his arm. She looked at Heath indignantly. "These men were informing me that you said I wasn't your sister."

Heath rubbed the back of his neck. Realizing he had forgot to inform Audra of his ruse to protect her, he spoke to her in a clear ordering tone. "Well, you ain't."

"That is true!" Audra turned back to the men. "He's not my brother."

She marched off towards the hotel causing her sapphire blue dress to brush up against the dusty boardwalk. Heath eyed the Johnsons as he placed his hand on the gun belt.

"Don't be thinkin' of anything stupid, boys." Heath warned. He tried to think of a reason for Audra's obstinacy that would convince the Johnsons that Audra was his wife. "She's mine. Her Pa set up the marriage to join our lands. She's not quite taken with the idea yet. She's still mine all the same."

Heath tipped his hat as he made his way to the hotel. He walked up to Audra. He took her by the elbow realizing the Johnsons were still on his trail.

"One room. One key." Heath tossed the coin on the hotel desk.

The clerk rubbed his chin as he looked at that coin. They had already rented two separate rooms. They had paid already as well. However, the coin was telling the clerk that the man had changed his mind but didn't want to take back his money. That suited the hotel manager fine. Less cleaning and less trouble.

The hotel clerk still wanted to make sure he understood."She said two keys."

Heath glanced back at the Johnson boys, who had entered the hotel lobby. He sighed out. He'd have to explain to Audra later. "One room." He pulled Audra boldly to look at him. "Mind your place, Woman. Before I teach you a lesson of how to be a wife."

 **A/N Thanks for reviews. I hope this isn't getting boring for some. There will be action later or drama..actually both. But I have to get there. Reviews are slowing down. I hope that isn't a clue that the story is starting to bore some.**


	19. Chapter 19

_Chapter 19: You're Not My Brother_

The hotel clerk stepped back worriedly as he watched the young blonde cowboy sling the beautiful blonde girl over his shoulder. It had surprised him hearing the young man referring to the girl as his wife. They had registered earlier in two different rooms located beside one another. Their last names matched but the clerk thought they may be brother and sister due to the fact of separate rooms. Now, the cowboy was carrying his unwilling bride up the stairs as she kicked and protested.

"Newly weds." Matthew Johnson laughed. "I guess Heath is putting her in her place now. I was wonderin' when that boy would take control of that filly. Bout time."

Jacob shook his head in agreement. "Suppose we get to buying that horse and getting to Akinville."

"Suppose." Matthew slid his hand under his chin. "I still don't think it is a bit fair that a spawn of the devil can get something that good lookin'."

"He's rich too." Jacob shook his head. "Not fair at all. Not a bit fair."

The two men left the hotel lobby and headed for the livery stable to see if there was a horse cheap enough to buy to get back to Akinville.

Meanwhile, Heath had managed to get Audra inside the hotel room despite her kicking and screaming the whole way. He plopped her body down on the bed before turning to lock the hotel door. When he turned to try to explain, his face was met with a hard slap from Audra.

"How dare you? Who do you think you are? What has gotten into you?" Audra ranted on as she clutched her hand due to the pain from hitting Heath's face.

"Dang, Audra." Heath stated as he rubbed his cheek. "That hurt."

"It was meant to!" She yelled at him with ferocity. "First ordering the party over while you claimed the train car belonged to you not us. Then whatever that was down there."

"Listen, Sis." Heath began to explain but was interrupted by the irate girl.

"Don't call me sister!" Audra dared him with anger flashing in her eyes. "Those men told me that you said I wasn't your sister. At least, that part I understand."

"Audra, would you quit being like Nick Barkley and simmer down?" Heath rubbed his jaw again. "Those men are dangerous. I knew them from long ago. The thing is that I had to claim you were my wife..."

Audra interrupted with a haughty reply. "Wife? Seriously, Heath."

"Listen." Heath rolled his eyes. "I swear now I think it is Mother's side of the family that temper and constant yapperin' comes from. Jarrod, Eugene, and I don't go rambling on like you and Nick. Mother always did say Nick was more like her brother Jeffrey."

Audra crossed her arms over her chest defiantly. "I know I'm not a Barkley, Heath."

Heath threw up his hands in frustration. "That's not what I was saying. Dang it. Give me a break, will you? I haven't slept all night. Then having to worry about you. I'm tired. I should've explained but I thought the Johnson's were out of our hair."

Audra sat back down on the bed waiting for Heath to explain. "Well, how is it that you told I was your wife?"

Heath gave the brief explanation of meeting Esau. He told of how the Johnsons were raised not to respect a woman. Finally, Heath finished with saying he said she was his wife to protect her.

"That's barbaric." Audra added when he was finished. "No man can claim a woman as property."

"I know that." Heath settled down beside her. "I ain't saying it's right, Sis."

"Don't call me that." Audra protested. "I'm not your sister."

"You're still mad." Heath flopped back on the side of the bed. "Dang it. I'm tired of this."

"I'm not an invalid, Heath. I can take care of myself." Audra protested defiantly. "I didn't need you pretending to protect me."

"Like H*ll you didn't!" Heath's fist met the mattress on the bed. Audra jumped slightly at Heath's foul language and abrupt action. "You're a spoiled little girl if you think this world is as easy as living on that ranch of ours or in Stockton. Before you say it. I know you've went to other countries and all that la te da stuff. But this is the wild part of the country, Audra. NOT what you're used to. I've seen more than you can imagine from men. I've seen a few wild women too. I aim to protect you and you better take heed!" Heath breathed out trying to calm down. "I have been comforting you back home. I never felt closer to you. You felt like my responsibility to make sure you made it through all this hard time. But Dang it, girl. I plan on being more than your comforter. I'm going to protect you as well."

"It's not your job." Audra felt her throat tighten with tears. "You're not even my family now, Heath."

"I never was if you put it like that." Heath closed his eyes. "Audra, I still care no matter what kind of relationship we have. We still have one. And by gosh, I'm gonna keep you safe. It might not be my job as far as you're thinkin' but you well better believe I want to and aim to keep you safe."

Audra chuckled slightly as she laid back in the same manner Heath was. "That's the most I've heard you talking since the day you claimed your rightful place as a Barkley."

Heath laughed lightly. He was relieved she was calm now. She packed a mean slap when she wanted. "At least you didn't have that little whip of yours."

Audra grinned as she turned her head to stare at Heath. "It seems once again you've forced me into your hotel room."

The connotations of that sentence were not noticed by Audra. Her innocence and naivety played a part in that. However, Heath Barkley was far from naïve and innocent especially when it came to male/female relations. He felt his face flash red at the memory of Audra trying to seduce him the first night of their meeting. For a brief moment, Heath thought of if he knew what he knew now, would he have turned down Audra's seduction. He concluded that he probably would've scared Audra to death with a kiss that only should be shared with a wife or a woman paid for such attention.

He broke from his thoughts to turn to stare at Audra. "What is your thoughts for today? We don't need to hold up in the hotel all day. As long as you go along with me on the wife thing. Please Audra."

"Fine." She huffed out. Audra still felt she could handle herself but Heath's tone was stubborn on the subject. She knew of all the Barkley's. Heath Barkley was the most stubborn even more so than that of Nick. "I do need to get mother a gift. I saw the most beautiful shawl in the window. As my husband, I expect you to go along."

Heath ran his hand over his face. "Shoppin'. Figures."

Heath and Audra spent most of the day meandering around town shopping or checking out other scenery. They did look like a couple as they made their way through town. The Johnson boys had noticed them as they were getting supplies for their trip home. Heath's arm was securely around Audra's shoulders the whole time. Audra played her part well as she found her arm entwined around Heath's waist.

"Looks like lover boy showed her what a wife's duty is." Jacob elbowed Matthew as they got up on the horse. They had to share one horse due to lack of funds to purchase two.

"Seems she may have enjoyed her duty the way she's hanging all over the boy." Matthew grunted with envy. "Still ain't fair at all."

"Nope." Jacob agreed. "Let's get. Pa will have our hides if we waste Ma's good cooking. You know they'll have a meal a waitin'."

Heath and Audra forgot all about the Johnson brothers but continued their charade as they went about their day. It was actually amusing them both as Audra would pretend to call Heath 'Dear' and he would refer to her as 'Sweetheart'. They had even been told by a few elderly women what a gorgeous couple they were. A few told them what lovely children they'd be blessed with. This caused Audra's cheeks to turn pink, which made Heath tease her throughout the day.

They at lunch in the same café then later that day followed it up with a late dinner. When they arrived back at the hotel, Heath told Audra he'd take the floor. He'd slept on worse things.

Heath stood outside the hotel door while Audra changed and settled in bed. After Heath entered, he pulled off his shirt before laying on the floor using his rolled up shirt for a pillow.

"I had a great time today, Heath." Audra settled back pulling the cover tight. She had already tossed Heath the sheet that had been beneath the cover. "Thanks."

"It was kind of nice." Heath agreed. "Except the shoppin."

Audra leaned over the bed and smacked his head with a pillow on the bed. Heath arched one eyebrow at Audra before he attacked her with the pillow. Audra giggled as Heath walloped her with the pillow. Both used the two pillows that the hotel offered to smack each other back and forth. Heath had never laughed so hard due to never having been in a pillow fight. Audra had a few fights in her life and was taking a delight in using her expertise to catch Heath off balance a few times. The barrage of giggles wore Audra out. She wanted the upper hand so she used a pillow to knock Heath over. She pinned Heath down after she knocked him on the bed. Her body was on top of Heath's. Suddenly, he felt very uncomfortable with Audra straddling his hips. He tried to think of a way to get out of the situation without embarrassing them both.

He grabbed her wrists as he rolled her over. This time his upper body was on top of hers. At least this was better, Heath thought. The girl had no idea what she could illicit in a man especially a man who was trying to come to terms with having a family thrust on him in such a short time. Heath thought himself a demon to even entertain such thoughts.

Audra's face was flushed red with their innocent play. Now, something stirred in her as the weight of Heath's body pressed against hers. She was breathing in a panted breath when she stared at Heath's blue eyes. She swallowed as she saw the way his eyes stared back at her. It was a different look than she'd ever seen from any man before. Suddenly, she was aware of the heat coming from the skin of Heath's bare chest.

He looked down at Audra as he held her arms over her head. Her face was blushed causing a crimson gleam to her cheeks. Her blonde hair stuck to one side of her cheek. Audra's panted breath caused her chest to rise against his own chest.

Heath reached up then dragged his calloused finger across her cheek to remove the stray tendrils of hair. With a sudden jerk of his body, Heath hurled himself off of Audra.

"I'm plum tuckered out." Heath was in floor stuffing one of the pillows behind his head before Audra could register how he had gotten there so fast. "Better get some sleep. That stage coach will be here early. I got to get our horses ready to go as well."

With those words, there fell a silence in the room. Audra felt like a little girl as her heart beat rapidly in her chest. Why had Heath's body against hers caused such a jolt of fire throughout her body? Audra wasn't sure what happened. On the other hand, Heath was too aware of what happened. Heath silently cursed himself. Audra silently let a few tears stream down her cheeks.

Neither would get much sleep as they lay staring at the ceiling. Both concentrated on the other's breathing hoping that sleep would soon take their minds off the innocent pillow fight that ended not so innocent in thoughts.

 **A/N Someone called that slap a coming! Haha. Thanks for the reviews and for reading.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20: Late**

Heath had finally fallen into a restless sleep. He didn't know how late it was before his eyes finally closed in weariness. After all, he had not slept much the night before on the train. His worry of the Johnsons and Audra had him fighting off the needed slumber. Then last night's unwanted thoughts of a girl, who he was supposed to think of a sister, plagued him. _If mama knew what went through my mind last night. Or worse MOTHER!_ _Jarrod would give me a good talking to. Nick would beat the daylights out of me. Eugene would try to match Nick's behavior but would fall short._ _Audra would be appalled_. Heath thought as he became consumed with guilt.

Audra was used to sleeping in later than Heath. The man was always up before anyone, including Nick and the ranch hands. His morning began before the sun peeked over the horizon. Even if she fell asleep not long before he had, she still relaxed in her bed not bothering to wake. She was certain that Heath would wake her.

Heath placed his arm over his eyes in protest of the sun shining in his face. Then his eyes popped open in surprise. _What time was it?_ His thoughts became an uneasy panic.

He pulled out his pocket watch as he sat up in a hurry. "Dang! Boy howdy, Audra get up! I think we missed the stagecoach."

Audra's moan protested against being waken. She had little sleep causing her a headache. Heath started to pull off her blankets as he would do with Nick. When his hand clutched the quilt, he halted. _Not a good idea, Heath Barkley._ He told himself remembering Audra wasn't a male nor was she a related female.

"Get up!" Heath rose his voice trying to get the groggy female out of bed. "Audra!"

"Don't yell." Audra sat up slowly wiping the sleep from her eyes. She glanced around. "What time is it?"

"Near 9 am." Heath rubbed the back of his neck. "We missed the early stage coach. I'll go find out when the next stage is heading out. Get dressed and we can see what time we have for a quick breakfast."

Heath poured out some water into the dry sink and splashed his face before disappearing from the hotel room. Audra sighed out. She couldn't believe they overslept. Heath must have been exhausted and the floor must have been quite uncomfortable.

Heath approached the stage coach depot. He noticed the portly fellow with balding hair. _What was it about depot managers? Were they all destined to be short and chubby?_

"Did I miss the stage to Wash, Nevada?" Heath knew it was to leave at 8 am. However, sometimes stage coaches were late. He was hoping this was that time.

"Sure did. It was right on time." The man looked over the rim of his round glasses.

"What time is the next stagecoach?" Heath raked his hand over his face in frustration.

"Not today." The man allowed his glasses to slide to the ridge of his nose. "Not tomorrow either. There's a big rodeo going on around Piker's Peak. Not having any stages until a few days. Not from here any way. If you can make it to Akinville, you can catch a stage there tomorrow morning."

"Do you know if there will be another train soon?" Heath knew the answer to his question before he asked. That answer was no. The reason for traveling by stage was the train wouldn't be back for another week. "Never mind."

"Sorry, son. But you and your misses will have to travel by horse. I notice you had some fine horses unloaded from the train yesterday." The man grinned. He had seen the young cowboy and his wife strutting around town like two peacocks proud of their plumage. "It is only a day's ride from here. Might make it before nightfall if you get going."

"Can my wife get her luggage transferred to Wash, Nevada by stage even if we take to horseback?" Heath breathed out in frustration.

"Sure can. I can make sure the luggage gets on the stage come Wednesday. It should be there a week or so after you arrive. Shouldn't be too long. " The old man had a mischievous glint in his eye. This young cowboy's wife didn't look like she'd want to dress down for traveling. He figured the blonde cowboy was in for a tongue lashing from his beautiful bride. "Your wife looks like the type that loves her dresses."

"She does." Heath felt discouraged.

Heath nodded his thanks as he headed towards the livery stable. Audra would be furious. Heath hated that her trip was full of anger towards him. She'd have to deal with it. It wasn't like he planned this.

Things only got worse when he arrived at the livery stable. The burly man taking care of the horses looked up. "I see you missed the stage. The boss man said to have these horses ready to be tied to the stage to Wash."

Heath nodded. "I guess I'll put on some full saddle bags and head out on them instead."

"That will be a problem, Mister." The man rubbed the scraggly hair on his chin. "Your mare hair has a nasty gash. Nothing serious. I treated it with some balm. But she won't be worth riding. She might can carry a small load though."

Heath bent down and took a look at the black mare. "D**n. What did you go and do to yourself, Midnight?"

"A raccoon comes creeping in sometimes. There's a few kids play around here. I run them off but they still manage to sneak in. They bring their lunches and leave them. I figure that old raccoon startled the filly. She must've scraped her leg against the wood of the stall." The man rubbed his chin again as in deep thought. "We don't have any horses left to rent. There's a rodeo on Piker's Peak in a couple days. Rented them all out."

Heath felt Charger nudge his shoulder. The horse was devoted to his master. He wanted attention. Heath rubbed Charger's nose. "Guess, you'll have to carry Audra. I'll be walking. I know you want to get out and exercise anyway."

The livery stable man half grinned at the way the young cowboy treated his horse. He waited for the blonde man to give him more instructions.

"I'll be back after I buy some supplies." Heath blew out air as his face began to etch with worry. "Unsaddle the mare. She can stay here if you don't mind keeping her. I can pay for her keep. I'll send money for her to be on next week's train back to Stockton. I don't want her hurting worse. How about that old mule there? I'd rent him if you'd let me. He can pack a load for me."

"Sure. He can. But he's not for rent. I'd sell him." The man grinned broadly. "Ole Clyde is ornery but he can do work. His owner passed away a few weeks ago. I had no idea what to do with the thing. He's yours for ten dollars."

Heath rolled his eyes. He knew he was being taken. The mule wasn't worth much. However, Heath was desperate. He handed the man ten dollars. "Get Clyde ready. I'll be leaving in about an hour."

When Heath arrived back at the hotel room, Audra was dressed in a beautiful pink dress with white roses embellished throughout it. Heath sighed as he stared at her.

"Put on your ridin' clothes." Heath stated in a short manner. "We got to go horseback for a day's ride. We missed the stagecoach because of waking up late."

Audra looked up as she pinned up her hair. "Fine. I can ride. Midnight needs exercised."

"She's lame. I'll be walkin'. You'll be ridin' Charger." Heath grabbed up his saddle bag. "Hurry. I don't reckon I want to be walking at night."

"I can walk some." Audra insisted as she stood up to grab some clothes.

Heath looked at her packing some elegant dresses along with her mother's shawl, which she purchased yesterday. "You can't even pack for a day's ride, Audra. Pick something simple. A change of clothes and wear riding clothes." Heath snapped as he threw his saddle bag over his shoulder. "I'm going to buy some supplies we may need. Meet me at the livery stable."

With those words, Heath was gone. Audra crossed her arms defiantly over her chest. Heath was starting to get a little too bossy for her liking. What happened to the nice handsome man who comforted her only a few nights before?

As Heath gathered supplies, he felt a twinge of guilt hit him. He was so tired and frustrated with his thoughts of Audra, he was acting like a blame fool. He had no right to be so snappy at Audra. He'd have to make it up to her on the way to Akinville.

Then Heath stopped as another wave of worry hit. Akinville. The Johnsons practically infested that little town.

 **Author's Note: I have started another story. It will not interfere with me updating this one. I usually update once a week on this. That will remain the same unless life circumstances dictate other wise. I have future chapters already written for this one. For the readers of this, don't let a new story of mine make you think I'll neglect this one.**


	21. Chapter 21

****Chapter 21: Girls and Gossip****

After shaving, Heath brushed his teeth. He was glad the hotel had some nice bath houses near. He knew the trail was going to be dusty. Heading off with a clean shave and a clean body helped make him more relaxed. He was glad to be getting on with the trip. The sooner they got to meet the Cartwrights; the sooner they could head back to their own ranch. Perhaps then some kind of normalcy would come back to their lives.

Turning in the luggage and putting the bedrolls on, he had noticed Audra had only taken one fancy dress and a simpler change in clothing to carry along on the one day journey. Heath felt guilty for barking orders at her. Because of his wanting to make amends, Heath retrieved the green shawl Audra had purchased as a gift for their mother. At least, Audra would be a little less perturbed knowing he was trying to make amends. Heath rolled the shawl in paper before sticking it inside his own bedroll.

Audra and Heath ate breakfast in silence. He glanced at her noticing her hair was in a simple pony tail. It surprised him as Audra never seemed to go without her hair neatly in place and fixed. Today, her hair was more wavy due to a simple bath without much fuss over things. Even on their family's long camping trip, Audra had fussed with her hair some. Not today. She looked simple and not like her usual self. Heath chuckled to himself at the word 'simple' and Audra being in the same thought. The girl couldn't pull of simple if she were in a feed sack.

Glancing up from her food, Audra noticed Heath's strong handsome features. To her, he was the most beautiful of the Barkley boys. Audra almost chuckled at that description. Heath would be blushing and saying a female was beautiful; a man was not. However, Audra couldn't think of any other way to describe Heath Barkley. He was beautiful. It was a masculine beautiful that Audra knew most of the girls in Stockton noticed. Too bad, a lot of the people still held prejudices about Heath even after a year.

Feeling odd about her new noticing of Heath's fine features, Audra thought back to some of the girls in Stockton. Many times, the young ladies would gather to comment on men. Of course, they used other explanations for the meetings such as gathering food for less fortunate, making Christmas ornaments to decorate Stockton or a church social.

The Barkley brothers were always the topic of conversation. Jarrod was the handsome lawyer that any sophisticated young lady would want to have as a husband. He was the one most wanted for marriage. Nick was equally sought after. Thinking of Nick, Audra smiled. All the girls were wooed by him. They talked of his rugged handsome looks. Eugene was even spoke of being such a great catch for a husband when he finished his schooling. However, most young ladies supposed he'd be swept off his feet by someone from his college area. Heath was the one most girls giggled about. They seem to be transported back to girly teen year when Heath was brought up.

Their mothers would be shocked at some of the things Audra had heard being whispered about the blonde Barkley. The girls thought they were so clever with their whispers. They had thought they kept them from Audra's ears. Too many times Audra had heard their crude remarks of wanting to do unlady like things with the newest Barkley boy. Of course, they all agreed he was not marriage material. Yet, they wouldn't mind if Heath broke them like he was known to break a wild stallion. No lady would dare speak of such things. Yet, these girls had thought they had done so in secret.

Audra remembered being appalled by the girls' words when she had headed to walk into the room. None of the girls had met Heath at that time. It wasn't the first time Audra had heard her friends discussing her brothers. However, it was to be the first time the girls had brought up Heath. The fact was it would not be the last.

The giggling brood didn't know she was there. Nor did they realize she had ever been. Audra had rushed away embarrassed by all she heard that day. Wishing she had not eaves dropped allowing her curiosity to get the best of her, she had Silas send them away with her apology.

The six young ladies were gathered making decorations for Stockton's fourth of July celebration. Audra had went to get some more refreshments. When she started to come into the room, the girls were all sitting around on the floor of the Barkley's parlor. The girls had decided to meet there in hopes of catching a glimpse of one of the Barkley brothers. They were pleased to find out Eugene was in town as well.

 _"_ _I think Jarrod is the most strikingly handsome man in these parts." Abigail Sanders took a drink from her lemonade. "He looks so inspiring in his gentleman suits."_

 _"_ _True." Clara Mason agreed but added. "However, Nick is truly ruggedly handsome. I think he is more handsome as far as the type I prefer."_

 _"_ _He's aggressive though." Bonnie Sawyer added. She glanced around the group. "Well, he'd not do anything you'd not want him to. But the man has to be told when to stop or he'd keep going."_

 _A few nodded their heads with mischievous smiles on their faces. It seems Nick Barkley had been kissing at least three of the young ladies before._

 _It was Rebecca Simms who spoke next. "Eugene has turned into a handsome man as well."_

 _"_ _Oh yes." The girls agreed in unison causing a chorus of chuckles._

 _"I danced with him at the Christmas dance." Bonnie smiled. "He's rather shy. However, I can tell he's going to be similar to Jarrod with his gentleman ways. He will not have the slick words that Jarrod uses though."_

 _Pearl Buckman fidgeted shyly. She desperately wanted to be a part of her friends. She always felt like the ugly duckling in a pond of beautiful swans. "Have any of you laid eyes on the new one?"_

 _The girls all stared at one another. Abigail tried to whisper but wasn't successful."You mean the one they call Heath. The one not belonging to Victoria Barkley?"_

 _Pearl nodded as she twisted a blue ribbon nervously around her finger. "I saw him riding up with Nick the other day when they came to help father. As you know, father had been sick a week or so ago."_

 _"_ _You did?" Clara moved closer. "Was he dark haired like Nick and Jarrod or more the coloring of Eugene?"_

 _"_ _Was he tall?" Rebecca interjected. "Or more the size of Eugene. Which is not short but average."_

 _Pearl glanced up as her face reddened. "He was the coloring of Audra."_

 _"_ _Blonde!" Abigail spoke a little too loudly. "I never thought of that."_

 _Pearl was usually the one that had little to add to the conversations of the group of young ladies. However, she loved the fact she was center of attention. She smiled as she added. "He is about the height of Jarrod. However, he's more muscular than all of the brothers."_

 _"_ _Muscular." Clara squeaked. "How would you know?"_

 _"_ _I happen to see him with his shirt off." Pearl bit her lip as her face reddened at her admittance. "Father asked the boys to help unload some supplies. Well, as you know, it has been very hot. Most of the men were removing their shirts by the time they got half way. That included Nick and the new Barkley. I couldn't help but steal glances at Nick. He is quite the fine creature. No one saw me. I was hid behind the porch column. I dear say, I then saw Heath pull off his shirt and I was mesmerized." Pearl continued noticing the girls were all leaning to hear her. "He's got chest hair and his muscles are finely toned. But…"_

 _"_ _What?" Clara insisted. "Tell us."_

 _"_ _I studied him well." Pearl sighed. She realized how terrible she had acted that day. However, the girls were all listening to her for once. Therefore, she continued. "I couldn't help it. The men didn't notice or didn't care but he had very faint scarring on his back as if he'd been scratched or whipped. It didn't take from his back muscles though. It was faded scars that had to be from long ago. As I said, not really that noticeable unless someone was staring." Pearl blushed realizing she had been staring much longer than she should've been. She made an excuse. "He is by far the best looking to me."_

 _"_ _I can't believe you studied him that long." Abigail rolled her eyes. "I think you're exaggerating. There is no way the boy is that good looking. Jarrod, Nick, and Eugene are simply too handsome to compare to a half Barkley."_

 _Audra started to protest and send Abigail away but thought better of it. She wouldn't want to embarrass Pearl. The girl rarely spoke up._

 _Pearl crossed her arms over her chest. "Don't say that Abby. The Barkleys would flog you. We should not speak of him in such a way. It isn't right. He seemed like a nice young man."_

 _Bonnie shook her head. "Be careful, Abby. My brothers said that Nick is protective of Heath. His fists have knocked many a man backwards for calling Heath crass names."_

 _"_ _Fine." Abigail conceded. "Still. He can't be that handsome."_

 _"_ _He is I tell you." Pearl shook her head. "You have to see him. He's like an angel in the face with a body that was made by the devil himself. I'm sure of it. After all, I was tempted to stare."_

 _"_ _Pearl!" Rebecca scolded. "I can't believe you said that."_

 _Before the girls could say anything else, a loud booming voice came from the front room. Audra stepped back to hide more from their sight. Nick sauntered in bellowing out at someone._

 _"_ _I said it can't be done!" Nick's spurs jingled as he marched in the room. He didn't notice the girls settled on the floor in the corner of the room._

 _"_ _Let him try." Jarrod was right alongside of Nick. He noticed the girls as he tilted his head. "Ladies."_

 _All the girls smiled as the two entered the parlor. Eugene was with them as well. He smiled shyly. Nick winked at them before turning his attention back to his brothers. speaking loudly to Jarrod, Nick continued his tirade._

 _"_ _He'll get his fool neck broke." Nick leaned against the mantle angrily. Jarrod winked at Eugene knowing how protective Nick was over Heath. It was ironic that Nick was like a mother hen over their fair haired brother considering Heath had lived a much more difficult life than anyone of them._

 _The girls all were enamored as the three brothers stood talking in their view. None of the girls dared to speak in fear the men would remember they were there and leave._

 _"_ _I thought Heath was good at breaking horses." Eugene asked as he sat down on one of the sofas. He smiled at the girls as he stared their way._

 _"_ _HE'S THE BEST." Nick added quickly causing a slight jump in Eugene. "Doesn't matter if he's busting a horse or gentling it. Heath can break him. But he's determined to break the bronc this time."_

 _The girls all glanced to each other at hearing the newest addition to the family's name. Then they heard the sound of the man in question's voice._

 _"_ _Boy howdy." The blonde was being followed into the room by one of the ranch hands. The females' eyes all landed on the blonde. He had his head down. The ranch hand attempted to help him as Heath pushed the man away._

 _"_ _What did you do, boy?" Nick rushed to Heath, who had a patch of blood on his side._

 _"_ _It's fine. Just a scratch is all." Heath threw his hat down as he spoke. "I was thrown off …."_

 _"_ _I told you to stay off that horse!" Nick bellowed again. He grabbed at Heath's shirt and pulled it open. "Are you okay?" Nick shook his head as he studied his brother's side. "I guess it is a scratch." Nick added after making Heath allow him to carefully inspect his side._

 _Heath looked up to notice the group of females. His tan face turned pink as he swatted Nick's hands away. "I'm fine."_

 _Heath pulled his shirt back together before heading out the door quickly from the girls prying eyes._

 _"_ _He broke the horse, Boss." The ranch hand stated as if that was what counted._

 _"_ _I thought he said the horse threw him." Jarrod arched his eyebrow. "That's why Heath's hurt."_

 _"_ _Yes." The ranch hand chuckled. "That was before Heath got back on the horse and broke it."_

 _"_ _Come on." Nick grabbed Eugene by the back of the neck, who had not taken his eyes from the girls since he entered even to ask about Heath earlier. Nick pulled his little brother up from the chair. "Let's go check on that stubborn brother of ours."_

 _Jarrod laughed as he followed his brothers and the ranch hand back out to check on their stubborn blonde haired brother._

 _Pearl turned around to face all the girls. She smiled victoriously. "I told you."_

 _"_ _I'd not marry him." Rebecca shifted around haughtily. "He's very rough acting. Kind of hard to tell who was the ranch hand and who was the Barkley. You can tell about the other boys that they are Barkleys by their upbringing."_

 _"_ _Did you see his eyes though?" Clara said in a singsong voice. "They were so blue. When he looked this way, I felt faint."_

 _"_ _It's not surprising since he favors Audra as Pearl said." Bonnie sighed out. "He was very beautiful."_

 _"_ _Men aren't beautiful." Clara rolled her eyes._

 _"_ _Well, that one is." Bonnie argued. "Not that I'd consider marrying him due to his past."_

 _Audra was getting angry and was about to barge in but halted at the next words from the girls._

 _"_ _He's not marriage material at all." Abigail had a glint in her eyes. She was tired of Pearl being the center of attention. Abigail was used to being the one with the best conversation. "But I'd love to been that horse with those thighs touching me."_

 _"_ _Abby!" All the girls squealed. "I can't believe you. Your mother would fall over knowing you used such words."_

 _"_ _Don't tell me that you all weren't thinking that you wouldn't mind Heath breaking you in." Abigail, who was always trying to shock the pack of girls chuckled at their dropped mouths. She added to cause more of reaction. "And I bet those faint scars on his back are scratch marks a few females put there. We all can imagine how wild he is. I bet that man has been with a lot of women."_

 _Audra turned and ran from the room embarrassed at Abigail's brashness. Ladies didn't talk like that._

Suddenly, Audra dismayed at the memory of the way Abigail had embarrassed them all. Audra didn't like the words used by the girls about Heath. After that, she quit inviting them over accept for Pearl. The girl had taken up for Heath.

As Audra stirred her food around, the words of Abigail haunted her more than embarrassed her now. She thought of how it felt with Heath's body against hers the night before. She thought of how very innocent she was but still had such thoughts. Abigail was probably correct in her assumption of Heath. Not about the scars. Those were from him being in Carterson. However, she was sure that Heath had been with many women. For some reason, that fact made her angry yet frightened her at the same time.

"You done?" Heath asked breaking Audra out of her thoughts. "If we want to make it to the Cartwrights before our family gets suspicious, we best be headin' out before it gets any later. Gettin' to Akinville will take a day from us already."

 **A/N I erased and edited the chapter. It was a little more crass than I meant for it to be. However, I am trying to show how Audra begins to think of Heath in ways inappropriate for a lady. The feelings are new to a girl of 19, who has been protected from such things. The words of the girls were to show that Audra is battling with similar thoughts of Heath as a man.**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N- I would like to give thanks to the support for this story. My story was having some trouble between updates with reader views. But the admin. here fixed it. Now I can poste more of the story. I'd like to thank one reader personally for understanding and giving me support in this story. This reviewer also helped me think of this chapter by giving me an idea in the message. I think it should be made plain that Audra and Heath were never bonded as brother/sister. I had said that at the beginning of the story. But here is a chapter to reiterate that. Thanks again**

 _Chapter 22: On the Way to Akinville_

The sun over head beat down on the dry dirt road. Dust picked up under Charger's hooves as Heath pushed his horse trying to make it to Akinville before dark. Audra took turns riding the mule, which Heath had purchased, and riding Charger. When she was mounted on Charger, Heath walked. Audra wasn't sure which of the creatures were more stubborn, Heath or the mule.

"I guess it hurts your cowboy pride to ride the mule?" Audra quipped as she watched Heath in front of her. "You're ridiculous."

"You wantin' your turn on Charger?" Heath glanced back at Audra perched on the old mule.

"No. Because then you'd start walking again and we'd be making less time." Audra hated riding the mule. It was stubborn not to mention uncomfortable.

"Well, that's the choice I'm givin' ya." Heath raked his hand over his forehead. He bit his lip as he prepared to apologize for his shortness with her. "Listen, Sis."

"Don't call me sis!" Audra snapped. It was mainly due to her thoughts of Heath. That little word made her very uncomfortable now. However, Heath figured she was still mad at him for not telling her of his deception with the Johnsons. Not to mention his cold treatment of her since last night's pillow fight. The apology would wait until they could talk.

Heath kept calling her 'sis' to remind him that was how it was supposed to be. Somehow, on the trip, that title and his thoughts had became convoluted. He figured if he said it out loud enough, he may convince himself of it.

However, Heath realized that even after the past months with the family, he and Audra were never really like brother and sister. Yes, he admitted to himself they were close. Perhaps closer than he had ever been with a woman, who wasn't thought of as family.

Silence from Audra only caused him to think of the past months since he came to know his new family. He hadn't been there quite a year yet. Ten months was the timeframe. He thought about the things that had transpired when he had met Audra.

There was an immediate attraction between the two at his father's grave. Heath wasn't ignorant of how women looked at him. Even in his tattered clothes, women found him attractive. Audra was no different. He could see it in her eyes when he had her pinned to the ground. He was trying to get her to drop her riding crop. His upper body had her upper body pinned as he laughed at the comical incident. It wasn't until he released her and she said she was Audra Barkley did he clear the attraction from his mind. It was almost immediate to do so.

Heath's mind wondered to other moments of how they had been the last ten months. Audra had accepted him almost immediately after that. They began to spend time together. Heath's brow knitted together as he thought of the excuse of not having time to form that sister/brother bond. It was an excuse he used for being distant on the train to the fair. She was sick but he acted more like an errand boy rather than her brother. Audra and Heath had claimed it was the distance of not knowing each other. However, that was really untrue. They had spent a lot of time together.

Jubal Tanner's arrival had the old man saying how they were marked with Tom Barkley. Heath realized now it was him alone that held Tom Barkley's mark on him. However, that moment took Heath back to the playful manner Audra and he had been displaying only a moment before Jubal arrived. Was that a brother and sister time of play? Or was it two adults ignoring the attraction to one another due to thinking they were brother and sister? Heath was unsure now. He was unsure because he never really had considered Audra his sister. He considered her more his very close friend. Not that he thought of her romantically then. No this attraction was something very new or it was very new in him facing it. No matter what, he truly never thought of her as a sister. That bond had not formed yet. Friendship had.

There were other times that Heath thought of his time with Audra. Evan Miles on her nineteenth birthday was one instance. Heath had protected her. However, after Victoria had shot Evan to save Audra, Heath recalled how Audra clung to him rather than her other brothers. They found comfort in each other. Did he think of her a sister then? Heath realized he hadn't. Still it wasn't romantic in any way. It was comfort for a woman he had grown very close to as a friend. Wasn't that how sisters and brothers were? Friends? It was different for Audra and him. He knew it. Yet, he never tried to put a label on it in the past.

Heath thought of the way Jarrod and Nick treated Audra. She was like their little princess. She was treated as a child at times by them. Heath had always thought it was due to them being older. Heath was more her age. Then Heath's mind took him to Eugene. Eugene was less than a year older than Audra. That is why Victoria had lost Anna due to the closeness in pregnancies. Eugene never treated Audra like a child. There was still not the same closeness as there was with Heath and Audra. She didn't cling to Eugene as she did Heath. Audra and Heath had shared a much more physical closeness than she did with any three of her brothers. Heath had not noticed that before. However, it was now on his mind as he thought over the months with her. They always seemed to be clinging to each other in some manner or another when a traumatic incident had plagued the Barkleys.

Heath glanced over his shoulder at Audra again. She seemed lost in her own thoughts. Therefore, he turned back trying to think of a time when he thought of Audra as a sister. Had they ever formed that type of bond? The answer pounded in his head. NO.

His mind wandered to Audra and her suitors. He never was as protective as Jarrod and Nick were. He'd let Audra have any boy she felt was for her. Even when the mustanger, Lloyd, came into Audra's life. It was Jarrod and Nick who did the interrogating. It was only when Heath thought Lloyd was involved with the gang of thieves did Heath even care to get involved.

Scott Breckenridge was another instance. Heath became protective only when the man was going to take Audra in her ill fated attempt to save other's land. Heath squirmed in his saddle uncomfortable when he realized how he had noticed Audra's dress. He teased her of showing off too much skin. Would Jarrod, Nick, and Eugene noticed the low cut dress? If they did would they have been teasingly flirtatious in comments of Audra's skin showing? Or would they tell her to dress more appropriate as a brother should or would? Heath had noticed it immediately. He realized it wasn't due to his brotherly protective manner. It was just the fact he noticed Audra's dress showed off her skin. He had noticed!

He had even teased her earlier that day about swimming with her. She had hinted that she wasn't going to wear bathing suit attire. What was it? Aw yes, she'd have to wear her bathing cap if he came along. He had chuckled at her comment. Had that been a brotherly chuckle or a flirty one with an attractive girl? Was Audra's own words how she would've spoke to Jarrod, Nick or Eugene?

Heath was suddenly realizing there was never a sister/ brother bond. They had a relationship. That was plain for any one to see. But what did the relationship entail? It wasn't romantic by any means. At the same time, it was a far cry from a brother and sister bonding. Was there already a deep routed attraction but the circumstances kept those feelings buried? Or was their friendship enough not to notice that the brother and sister relationship had never been planted no less taken fruition?

Audra watched curiously as Heath glanced back over his shoulder at her. He had been doing that often. She supposed it was too make sure she was keeping up on the irritable mule. Audra sighed out as she allowed her mind to wonder into the thoughts not like a lady. She glanced up to notice the sweat on Heath's back was causing his shirt to cling to him. His back muscles were displayed in fine definition. Audra licked her lips as she thought of how his shirt probably clung to the front of his body. She chastised herself for thinking such unlady like things of him.

Heath glanced back again. This time he noticed Audra's red face. "There's a creek up here. We'll stop and let the animals rest and get a drink. We can have lunch too. I can see by your face that you're getting hot."

Audra wanted to crawl in a cave at Heath's words. She didn't realize she was blushing so. Her only blessing was Heath thinking she was hot. Yes. It was a hot day but she'd rode on hotter days. Audra decided not to argue that the animals weren't that tired nor was she. It would be best if Heath thought her blushing was redness due to the heat.

The two soon were dismounted as the animals drank from the water. Audra watched as Heath pulled off his shirt before heading into the water in his britches. "What are you doing?"

"Cleanin' up. A quick swim will cool me down. Besides, I'll be dry by the time we get into Akinville." Heath kept on wading out to the water. Soon he was waist deep. Heath went under water quickly to wet his whole body.

Audra blinked as he came back out of water. Now he wasn't sweating. That would have been good for her but now it was worse. Water was glistening against clean bare skin of his chest. Audra felt the familiar heat rush to her face at the view of Heath.

Audra pulled off her boots and took off into the water herself. She did as Heath did.

Heath walked out of the water frowning as he watched Audra dunk herself. She trudged out of the water with her soaking clothes clinging to her. Now, he was not only stuck with the image of last night with Audra in night clothes. He was stuck with the image of her in soaked clinging clothes.

His frustration was getting the best of him. This girl was going to kill him before this trip was over. "Why did you go and do that for? That ain't lady like, Audra."

"So. You said we'd be dry before Akinville. No one will see me." Audra rolled her eyes at Heath.

"I'll see you." Heath said under his breath.

"Excuse me?" Audra bent to wring the edge of her riding skirt out. She didn't want her boots to fill with water.

"Lets just get to Akinville and a good meal. I ain't hungry any more. You can eat if you want." Heath started to remove some food from his saddle bag.

"I'm not hungry either." Audra squared back her shoulders. "Lets go."

Before long, Heath and Audra were arriving in Akinville. Just as Heath had said, their clothes were now dry. The ride had been made in silence. This time Heath didn't glance back at Audra. He knew it was best to keep her out of his sight while her clothing was leaving nothing to his imagination. That wasn't exactly the words for it. It was more her wet clothing was causing a lot of things to happen in his imagination that shouldn't be.

Audra was still watching Heath ride. She couldn't help but stare at him. The feelings and thoughts were new to her. She felt guilty for the thoughts but couldn't resist the way the thoughts caused her heart to beat rapidly and her skin to tingle.

Finding out she wasn't a Barkley had sent Audra into a vulnerable state. Her thoughts and fears had taken over the last few weeks. She didn't feel like she belonged anywhere. She realized Heath felt the same way at times. Therefore, she clung to him as she always did when trauma hit the family. The guilt didn't outweigh the relief of the distraction of her new thoughts. The awakening she was feeling as a woman was much better than the feeling of confusion of her parentage.

Riding through town, Audra noticed a few men staring her way. She noticed Heath had pulled Charger up next to her in a protective manner. It frustrated Audra that Heath had began to coddle her like the family had been. She had told him she didn't like the way that felt when her mother and brothers tried to keep her pinned up due to her surgery on the train. Now, Heat was doing the same coddling. She wasn't a helpless little girl. Audra decided she'd show him that.

What Audra didn't realize was that Heath wasn't coddling her. He knew the world where Audra had been protected from it. He knew at times Audra had come in danger due to some ruffian. It was real danger. He knew that. However, Heath also knew that the world was full of people that didn't care to harm others for their own desires. Akinville held many men like that. Some women were like that here too.

Akinville wasn't a booming town. It wasn't a ghost town either. The population was decent enough to keep the town alive with a saloon, general store, livery stable, hotel, stage depot and a house of ill repute. There was no church and no school. The town was meant mainly for a rest stop for traveling men such as ranchers on cattle drives or other business men. It wasn't meant for ladies to be in. The only ladies around were the ones married to the men that lived there or the girls working in the house of ill repute. The same girls doubled as saloon girls. Where some saloon girls were off limits in other bars as far as sexual pleasures to a man. This town was different. The girls worked for both Sally, the owner of the house of ill repute, and for Jeb, the owner of the only saloon in town.

Heath took in a nervous breath. He spotted Matthew and Jacob immediately. They were flanked by four of their other brothers. Heath didn't want to run into the likes of the Johnsons. Even so, he wished their Pa was in town. The man was as ornery as they came. He taught his sons that women were no more than property. However, with those teachings, the patriarch of the Johnson family had taught his sons to respect the man, who owned that property.

The way the Johnsons were staring at Audra made Heath realize there wouldn't be much respect for Heath on that if he didn't play his cards right.


	23. Chapter 23

_Chapter 23: Flirting with Danger_

The small bar was the only place to get a meal in Akinville. Audra hadn't wanted to enter the facility. Therefore, Heath made an order than requested taking the food with him. Heath insisted they carry on the charade of husband and wife due to this being the Johnson's stomping ground. Audra never fussed. She was too exhausted to care at the moment. After Audra and Heath ate in their worn down hotel room, he made his way to the bar for a much needed drink.

Audra had barely spoke to him. He didn't blame her. He had been in a sour mood since this trip began. Most of it was his own doing, Heath could admit that. Heath couldn't stop the nagging guilt that had consumed him the last couple of days due to his thoughts of Audra.

Neither realized it was partly due to the non bond of siblings they had not yet acquired. Also unbeknownst to them, it was due to the vulnerable state both found themselves in. Audra had found out her whole life was nothing but a lie. She was never a Barkley nor was she Victoria's daughter. Audra's whole world had crashed around her despite pretending like she was fine with it all. She was far from fine. She was distraught, exhausted, and confused.

Thinking about Heath in the way that she had was a guilty reprieve from thoughts and fears that now plagued her. Audra had grown up in the last few days. With her knowledge of life not being as perfect as she thought it should be, came the fact she was no longer a little girl. With that fact, Audra began to notice things that a woman might. That included Heath's handsome looks. With Heath's handsome looks, unfamiliar feelings and desires had crept into her thoughts.

On the other hand, Heath had been plucked from his partial feeling of security too. He fought with his thoughts of how his father had raised a child that wasn't his while allowing a child that was to be neglected. The truth was that Heath was also second guessing his own mother. He loved her. That he was sure of. Leah loved him to. He was sure of that too. However, Heath had began to wonder if her love for him was stronger than Leah's love for Tom Barkley. Had it been so important to her not to cause Tom Barkley and his family trouble, that she would put Heath second to that?

Heath wasn't one to feel sorry for himself. He went on about life taking what was thrown at him. The only time he became enraged about his living conditions was when Nick had forced his hand. He claimed to want it all: the name, the heritage, the inheritance.

That was a lie that Heath had concocted in a moment of rage and insecurity. All Heath was really seeking was information of his family. He never really meant for them to know who he was. His anger at Nick brought too much information that Heath had wanted buried. It didn't matter much because soon Heath had began to want more of the family part of it. The rest wasn't important at all.

Rose's words had opened up a whole new wound for Heath. Once again, he felt second place to the great Tom Barkley and HIS REAL family. Heath hadn't quite felt full acceptance from the Barkley family yet. They all seemed to want Heath only if he was to be more like their idea of what a Barkley was. Audra was the closest that came to welcoming Heath as who he was. The fact, that she wasn't even a Barkley, caused the wound to fester.

Rose's declaration of knowing about Heath brought his past thoughts back to light. So many occasions reminded Heath that he was tested time and time again to belong to the family. The family which he desired beyond comprehension now. Matt Bentell and Gil Anders had been part of the past that had scarred Heath both physically and emotionally. Both times, Heath's own feelings were set aside for these strangers. The reasoning was because a Barkley would never act as Heath did with the matter of the men. The Barkley family didn't realize Heath's feelings that were hidden deep within him. How could they? He rarely spoke of himself in fears that he'd be lesser than they were.

Then came the matter of Korby Kyles. Heath had told Jarrod it was okay to represent Korby Kyles. Was there a part of Heath that hoped Jarrod wouldn't do it because he would put Heath first? Heath felt his oldest brother questioned the one thing Heath owned out right. His word. It wasn't fair to expect more from Jarrod. Heath fought against the question of would Jarrod have done the same with Nick or Eugene? Would he have questioned their word on the subject? Heath knew what his brother was made of. He knew his brother's passion for justice. It was engrained in him. Therefore, Heath did understand. It still didn't take the sting away of the feeling of being only half a Barkley.

The other things Heath seemed to be wallowing in as far as self pity was the orders the family had given him. Heath was under Nick on the ranch. That's the way it should be. Heath realized that. Victoria had done her best to make the boy feel like he was as much a part of them as any. Heath still knew if it came down to it, Nick was the final rule when it came to the ranch. Victoria had said as much with her words of the ranch belonging to Nick. Heath hadn't meant to eavesdrop. However, he had heard the words loud and clear. In truth, it was only right that Nick be the end say about the ranch. It didn't take the sting away and the feeling of being only half a Barkley.

Because both were feeling the pains of separation from the Barkley family, both were also allowing the truth of not being related to cause thoughts neither would have even considered only weeks before. Heath had started to realize the trip with Audra wasn't such a good idea. Wounds were opened that needed healed with both Audra and Heath.

Things were confusing enough without adding all the desires overwhelm them of each other.

Audra felt like a prisoner in the hotel room. She didn't care that Heath had told her to stay put. She decided to venture just outside to catch a breath of air. She placed the green shawl over her only fancy dress as she made her way out side. She stayed barely any time when she headed back up to the room. There was no use in getting Heath all bent out of shape again.

When Audra entered the room, she knew immediately that someone had plundered through their things. She raced to check on Heath's saddle bags. The last of their money had been stolen. Audra plopped on the bed as she placed her hands over her face. She sobbed desperately. What were they going to do? How was she going to fix this?

Heath found Audra distraught when he came back to the room. Before he could ask, Audra began apologizing for leaving the door unlocked. She begged for Heath's forgiveness.

Heath soothed her with an embrace. "Don't worry. I got a little money."

"How's that going to get us on a stage?" Audra bit her lip.

"Trust me." Heath said as he blew out a frustrated breath of air. He warned in an authoritative voice. "Stay put this time, Audra."

Heath left Audra sitting on the bed with that warning.

Heath hated when he had to earn money this way. He had done it more times than he could count. It was different when it was a game for pleasure rather a means to survive as it was now. Heath's way of reading people aided in his winning at poker. He could hide his emotions well with one steel glare with his icy blue eyes. However, Heath had another hidden talent. He had a memory like a steel trap. He could figure each hand after so many deals made. He knew almost with certainty what each man would be holding after a few hands. The counting of cards was easy enough but not always proved successful unless he was playing black jack. However, it was how a man's face would react to a card dealt that made Heath sure of his victory.

Caleb Johnson was the oldest of the Johnson boys. He was known for his prowess at the card table. However, tonight wasn't going so great for him nor any one else at the table. He watched as Matthew and Jacob threw down their hands in disgust knowing they had lost all the money they had to Heath Barkley. Another man, obviously only passing through town, shook his head as he folded.

Matthew tried to break Heath's concentration. "Where's that purty wife of yours?"

Heath sported his cocky sideways grin before throwing another poker chip on the table. "Raise you twenty."

Earl Jenkins, the local banker, threw his cards to the table. "Fold." He rubbed his chin. He knew Heath as a young man, not really a man as much as a boy. "You got a wife, Mr. Thomson?"

"Haven't you heard?" Jacob laughed. "Heath ain't no Thomson now. He's a Barkley as in Stockton Barkleys."

Earl Jenkins nodded his appreciation of that good news for Heath. He remembered the man had been a boy filling a man's shoes.

Caleb whistled at the name. "You are lucky at that good fortune. But I'm hoping that luck is about to change." He threw down another chip matching Heath's. "Call."

"Aren't you gonna answer?" Matthew leaned closer as he watched his oldest brother lay out his hand.

Caleb had a wide grin on his face until Heath showed his cards.

"My win and last hand, I'm afraid." Heath turned to Matthew. "She's waitin' in the hotel for me. Gettin' all prettied up as only she can." Heath winked as he stood up. "That's why it's the last hand. Can't keep a filly like that waitin'."

Heath marched out with his winnings. It should be enough to get Audra and him on the stage with a little more spending money. They could get a bank draft in the next town. They would have to come clean with Jarrod about their plans so there would be no problem in getting the money to make it for the rest of the trip. A telegraph would be sent to Stockton addressed to Jarrod. He decided to go tell Audra of the good news about his poker winnings. First, he'd stop by the gift shop and get her something pretty to ask her forgiveness of his attitude as of late.

"Shew wee, Caleb." Jacob leaned back in his chair as he placed his hands behind his head. "You should see that wife of Heath's. I betcha she is the prettiest thing I've ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on."

"Don't matter to me, Jacob." Caleb stood up downing the last of his beer. "My Allie is expectin' our third child. Don't look at other women any more."

"You got that wife of yours spoilt, Caleb." Matthew cast a glare at his oldest brother. "Pa don't understand why you pamper the girl."

Caleb had fallen head over heels in love with Allie, his wife. Despite how he was raised and how he had practically forced Allie into marrying him, the couple ended up with a good marriage. She loved him as well. They had decided to build a house on his father's property. Yet, they chose to build it as far from the Johnson patriarch as possible. They would not have their own sons tainted with the beliefs of Paul Johnson.

"I think Heath has a good idea. I've lost enough for tonight." Caleb grabbed his hat and placed it on his head. "I'm heading home to a good meal and a better woman." He pointed towards his two younger brothers. "If you two were smart, you'd stop being so rowdy and find a good woman too."

Caleb Johnson left as Matthew and Jacob snarled at their older brother's advice. Matthew spoke up first. "Pa done tried to teach that boy. Caleb is too smitten with his woman to realize that a woman is to be put in her place."

Audra had made her way to the outside of the hotel again. Who was Heath Barkley to tell her to stay put? He was getting as bad as Jarrod and Nick. She had pinned up her hair and wore her fancy sapphire dress. She had planned to wear it to meet Ben Cartwright. Audra's mind changed when she was staring out the window. She noticed a few men standing around a corral. The corral contained three average horses. Audra smiled coyly as she thought of a way to get them on their journey. She would show Heath that she could make up for the money, which she had irresponsibly let get stolen.

Audra clutched her pearl necklace as she made her way to the corral. She eyed the black horse as she approached. It would never be a horse that Nick or Heath would purchase. She figured it would make due to get them into the next town. The man standing holding the horse would surely realize the pearl necklace was much more valuable than the horse itself.

"Hello." Audra smiled as she brushed her hand over the horse's neck. "Is she for sale?"

"Yep." The older man shook his head. He was a tall man with a crooked nose. His hair was a flaming red color.

Audra frowned when she thought of him looking vaguely familiar. "Well, I seem to be at a loss for funds right now." Audra twirled the pearl necklace in her hand trying to get the tall man to notice the pearls. She wasn't at all trying to be flirtatious. She wanted the man to see the valuable necklace on her neck in hopes he'd barter the horse for them. The Johnson boys saw it much differently. To them, Audra was making a play for the man.

Caleb Johnson stood back as James Johnson smiled at the girl. He swallowed as he noticed his other two brothers making their way from the saloon to where they stood. Three more of the Johnson boys made it over to watch the scene they knew was getting ready to happen. That made six Johnsons standing around Audra. Caleb realized the naïve girl didn't realize she was flirting with danger. His brothers would take that as a sign to take her without a moment's thought of doing so.

Audra took a deep breath when she noticed Matthew and Jacob. She realized this must be all the Johnson brothers Heath warned her about. Audra hadn't notice the strong resemblance before. She was only set on getting the horse and showing Heath she was capable of helping out. After all, she had been the one who had been careless and left the door unlocked to their room.

She thought of the ruse Heath had asked her to keep up. Therefore, she added. "It seems my husband has cut off my funding." Audra breathed heavily. She added with a charming smile. "He thinks I'm helpless."

"You sure don't look helpless to me, Ma'am." Matthew sided up to Audra. "Heath sure tries to keep you reined in. He acts like he controls you."

Audra felt the heat rise in her face. How dare this man act like males had a right to control a woman? How dare Heath tell them he controlled her?

"Excuse me?" Audra said poignantly. "Heath doesn't tell me what to do."

"Didn't think so." Jacob laughed as he grabbed Audra around the waist. He pulled her to him. "Now, if your husband can't teach you to be a proper wife, maybe me and my brother here can."

"Let go of me!" Audra slapped Jacob's face as she kicked at him.

All the boys made a circle around Jacob and Matthew. They laughed and whistled as Jacob passed her over to Matthew. Audra screamed again. She couldn't believe that the town's people ignored her as she fought against the men. Caleb breathed in deeply as he stood back watching the event. He knew there was no use trying to stop his brothers. Because he made his way farming, he didn't wear a gun. If he did, he wouldn't shoot his own kin.

It didn't seem Caleb had to worry too much about the blonde beauty. He noticed Heath Thomson...Barkley approaching quickly. Heath had already pulled his gun.

"Fun's over, boys." Heath's voice came out cold and demanding. "I suggest you let go of my wife before I put a bullet in you."

Matthew turned around facing Heath. The other brothers cleared to stand behind Jacob and Matthew. Jacob held tight to Audra's arm. "Don't see how you're gonna be able to shoot us all, Heath."

"Don't plan to." Heath smirked as he stood unmoved. "You know I can get two or more rounds off before any one of you can get off one. The thing you boys have to ask yourself is which two will have a bullet between their eyes."

Matthew looked around at his other brothers. He smiled before shoving Audra towards Heath. Heath grabbed Audra by the waist as her body almost knocked him over. He looked up to see one Johnson blocking his way to the hotel. The others were going to attack while Heath's gun was down. Therefore, he swooped Audra by the waist and dashed away from the impending danger.


	24. Chapter 24

_Chapter 24: House of Ill Repute_

"What are we going to do, Heath?" Audra grasped on to Heath's arm as he backed into an alley way. They had ran behind a building before the Johnsons could figure out where they were going. "There are six of them. They'll find us."

"I know." Heath glanced around trying to come up with a plan. "I have an idea. Do you trust me?"

Audra nodded as she whispered. "Of course, I do."

Heath pulled her with him to a small door to the back entrance of one of the saloons. Audra hesitated as she glanced up to where they were going.

"I can't go in there." She took her arm from Heath's. Audra crossed her arms over her chest stubbornly. "Do you know what kind of women I saw go in there earlier?"

"Yes." Heath shook his head. "Listen, Audra. I know what this place is."

"Really?" Audra huffed. "I suppose you've visited places like this."

"I'm not going to discuss that with my little sister." Heath grabbed her arm again. He still used the word sister as a way to remind himself of what the Barkleys would expect from him. "We don't have time for this debate. We have to hurry. You said that you trusted me."

"I do." Audra grabbed the crook of Heath's arm again. She still hesitated when he tried to pull her into the door. "I'm not your sister, Heath."

"Don't I know it." Heath jerked her harshly. "Because if you were my sister, I'd throw you over my shoulder and swat your backside. You've got us in this mess, now let me get us out of it."

Audra begrudgingly allowed Heath to pull her into the door of the old building. Audra's eyes bugged out when she saw females dressed in scantily clad clothing scurrying around the large room. Many of the women only had on under garments. Some had shear material draped over them. Most of the females had painted faces and large curls in their hair. They all stopped to look at Audra and Heath. Audra could feel her cheeks redden with embarrassment and shame cumulating together.

"Well, hello, handsome." A woman with light gray hair walked up to Heath. She wore a saloon girl outfit and feathers in her hair. "You are a mighty good looking cowboy. But, honey, you don't have to bring your own girl to a place like this. We have plenty enough females here."

The girls all joined in laughter as the female spoke. She was obviously in charge of the house.

"I hate to barge in like this, Miss Sally." Heath grin lopsidedly.

"Heath Thomson!" Miss Sally grabbed Heath into a bear hug. "My garter belts and lace. I'd know that smile anywhere. Look at you. You've grown up."

"You know this person?" Audra was miffed as she crossed her arms again over her chest. "Figures."

"I'll ignore what your little lady just said, Heath." Sally pulled him into the room farther. Heath's hand was still latched on to Audra's arm. Therefore, she was pulled in as well. "Candy, get Heath a whiskey. Now, how can I help one of my favorite fellas?"

"My sister..."

"I'm not his sister." Audra rolled her eyes as she pouted.

"This girl.." Heath pointed angrily at Audra. "..was trying to prove to me that she could take care of herself. So she goes and does something stupid like flirt with the Johnson boys."

"Oh my, child." Sally took Audra's hand. She dismissed some of the scantily clad females to make room for Audra to sit down on a large, red velvet sofa. Audra did without question. Sally could see the girl was an emotional mess even if Heath was a little put out by the beautiful female.

"Those boys are dangerous, child." Sally pushed back Audra's hair from her face. "They think a female is theirs for the taking if they choose to. I guess they chose to take you."

"Yes, Ma'am." Audra felt tears brim her eyes. "I wasn't flirting with them like Heath thinks. I was only trying to trade a necklace for a horse they were selling. Mine came up lame a town from here. Heath and I had an argument over something stupid. He walked the part way and made me ride Charger and some blasted mule." Audra sniffed slightly trying not to cry. "Charger is his horse. I got our money stolen. My horse went lame. Heath had walked the part way because he is as stubborn as that mule. I know his feet are sore. I was just trying to help."

The words all came out in a long shattered breath.

Heath felt a little guilty when he saw Audra's tears. "Listen, Sis."

"I'm not your sister!" Audra spoke up vehemently.

"Heath, why don't you go see what is taking Candy so long? Also tell her to have Amber make up a room for this lovely girl to rest for the night." Miss Sally winked at Audra.

"Thanks, Miss Sally." Heath stood up and did as he was told.

"I get that you don't want him calling you sister." Miss Sally stood and poured Audra a glass of water.

"He's not my brother." Audra sighed out. "He is my brothers' brother but not mine. It is such a messed up story."

"Child, look at where I'm at. You can't get any more messed up than a place like this. Tell me." Miss Sally sat down beside Audra as she handed her the glass of water.

Audra took the glass and drank a sip. "We don't share a father or a mother. I was sort of adopted."

"I see. Heath was known as a bastard. I don't think his mother adopted children. He was too old to adopt when he left here." Sally became curious.

"Oh. How silly of me. You must have known Heath before he found out he was a Barkley." Audra glanced up with a quick smile.

"The Stockton Barkleys?" Sally's brow creased in confusion. Surely, the Heath Thomson she knew wasn't a part of the prominent family.

"Yes. He's Tom Barkley's son." Audra chuckled at the reaction of Sally.

Sally whistled at the thought of it. "Our boy found him a name and it's a mighty powerful one."

"Yes. He did. He found us a little under a year ago." Audra ran her finger along the rim of the glass. "The family adores him. His mother let him know of Father being his father on her death bed. He is definitely a Barkley."

"Yet, you don't claim him as your brother." Sally questioned with a huge grin.

"Now that I don't have to. I don't." Audra admitted shyly. "What I'm trying to say is I'm adopted by the Barkleys. I haven't had a chance to know Heath as such."

"Heath is beautiful specimen of a man. He has been since I've known the boy. I wouldn't want something looking that fine being my brother either if that wasn't the case." Sally teased as she watched Audra's face turn a shade of crimson.

"It's not that." Audra giggled slightly. "Although I do agree. Heath is beautiful. He's also kind and good and..."

"A man that a woman could easily find herself attracted to if she didn't need to tell herself he was relation. That kind of takes the blinders off of kinship." Sally patted Audra's hand. "You don't have to answer that. I guess you're still trying to figure that out. I owe Heath a lot. He used to keep watch over me and my girls a few years back. He got paid for it. However, not many men would take the job. They didn't respect us enough to care if we were hurt or damaged by other men. They figured we made our bed. We should lie in it. Heath was different. He saw one of my girls being roughed up one night. He came to her rescue. After that, I hired him to keep us all safe. In this line of work, men can get rough. The Johnsons messed up more than one girl before Heath came along. He was never a customer if you're worried about that."

"That's because half the girls did him for free." A girl with auburn hair stated. Of course, it was an exaggeration for Audra's benefit. She smirked at Audra knowing that Audra was shocked to hear such things.

"That's enough, Lila. She don't need to know everything." Sally warned her. "Now don't be a sass. Leave the lady alone."

Audra saw Heath enter into the room. She sat up straighter as he walked over to her.

His voice was full of concern as he spoke."Audra, I know you don't want to be here. But they'll be looking for you at the hotel. Those boys are determined to make you theirs. I can't let that happen. Miss Sally and her girls are nice folk. They can put us up for the night until I can think of how to get us out of town."

"I trust you, Heath." Audra bit her lip. She looked up at him with doe like eyes. "I'm sorry for not listening. I'm sorry for being such a spoiled girl." She looked around the room. She didn't like how some of the girls looked at Heath like he was a steak and they were a pack of dogs. "Where will you sleep?"

"Lady, Heath can choose any bed in this place he wants. None of us would mind sharing with him." Candy nudged Lila as they both chuckled.

"Girls!" Miss Sally warned again. "Heath, you can take the room beside Audra. None of the girls will bother either of you. Do you understand, girls?"

"Yes, Miss Sally." All the girls answered in a chorus of agreement.

Heath was restless as he lay in bed. He was worried about Audra. There were ten brothers in all. Paul Johnson was the father. He raised his boys to think of women as a little less than a horse but a little more than a skunk. Heath remembered how badly Lila had been beaten by one of the younger Johnson boys. The boy's name was Pete. He was eighteen years old. Heath was seventeen at the time. He had left Strawberry only a couple of months before due to Liberty, a girl he grew up with, not accepting his proposal. Although, Heath realized it was more wanting a family he never had with Liberty. He had cried over her death. However, her link to his past caused the pain and not so much being in love with her.

Heath found Pete Johnson practically raping Lila. The poor girl's face was full of bruises and cuts when Heath pulled the offender off of the young girl. By the time Heath was done with the boy, Pete ended up with more bruises and cuts than the young saloon girl.

The sheriff had little choice but to let Pete go when he was brought in. He claimed that he paid well for her time and she refused to give him his due pay. Lila claimed he paid her nothing. He was trying to get with her for free. It caused Heath to cringe slightly when the judge asked Lila if Pete had paid, would there be a problem? The girl said. "No. It's my job."

Heath didn't feel any woman of any stature should suffer at the hands of a man's beating. Therefore, Miss Sally hired the seventeen year old boy to protect the girls in her home. Many of the girls had no choice in their fate. It was either starve or sell themselves to men traveling through town. Most looked upon the girls as getting what they deserved no matter the outcome. Heath was told how the Johnson brothers took who they wanted. Sometimes the fate was much too high if the girls fought back. Three of Sally's girl ended up dead at the Johnson's hands. Of course, there was no way to prove such a thing. Heath readily agreed to protect the girls best he could. It worked too. Heath was a quick draw as well as a sure shot. Therefore, the Johnsons decided to keep their distance from the house of ill repute. After all, they could find a female anywhere. The Johnson boys took to kidnapping females. Some they forced into marriage. Some they left for dead. None were brave enough to testify against the rowdy family.

Heath hated having Audra in a place like this. She was too good for it. However, he didn't know how to keep her safe until he could find a way out of this town. Matthew and Jacob Johnson had set their sights on Audra. They planned on her being a wife to one of them if not both. Heath would die before he'd allow harm to come to Audra. What scared Heath the most was it may come to that. It wasn't the fact of him dying but of what Audra would endure at the hands of the Johnsons if he did die trying to save her.

"Heath?" Audra's whisper broke Heath's worrisome thoughts. "Are you awake?"

"Yep." Heath rolled to his side to see Audra standing in the door with a heavy blanket wrapped around her. "What's wrong, Audra?"

"I'm afraid." Audra admitted softly. "I'm afraid for you as much as me. Can I sleep here tonight?"

Heath swallowed. Did the girl not realize the effect she could have on a man with her looks as well as softness? She didn't need to be in his room. He wasn't her brother as she often reminded him on this journey. It wasn't lady like to be in a room with a man. At the same time, being in a house of ill repute wasn't good for a lady any way.

"Sure." Heath sighed feeling defeated. Audra and he had no idea where they stood as far as family. The trip only had forged more muddled feelings between the two. "You take the bed. I'll get the floor."

Audra ignored him as she lay down beside him. "I'm so frightened. I can't sleep."

His arm went around Audra's form. He felt her shaking beside him. "I'll protect you, Audra."

Audra murmured something before she immediately fell asleep feeling safe in Heath's strong arms.


	25. Chapter 25

**_A/N Thought I'd post the next chapter as I see it is needed. For Tauna (; It is my last chapter I have written for now but a future chapter for down the road. Thanks to all reading and reviewing._**

 _Chapter 25 : The Killing Kiss_

Heath ran his fingers along Audra's jaw then down the length of her neck. She had fallen asleep shortly after crawling in bed next to him. He closed his eyes as he pulled back his long fingers from her. He swallowed audibly fighting of the demons that were beginning to take control over him. What man wouldn't have to fight off those type demons when a beautiful woman lay in his arms? Audra possessed not just any normal beauty but beauty that rivaled any female he had ever seen. But this wasn't any female. This was Audra Barkley a girl supposed to be his sister. Yet, she wasn't by blood. That's not how the family saw it though. If he were a Barkley, and he was, he had to see her as the rest of the Barkleys did. Audra had to be his sister no matter if they had different mothers and different fathers.

Heath had tried desperately to put away the nagging demons of temptation he'd began to experience on this trip with her. It was supposed to be a simple get away to gather Rose's things from the train depot as well as meet the Cartwrights. No secret would be revealed. It was supposed to be a get away to help Audra clear her mind of all that had happened. A simple trip. Now, the trip had turned into something far more dangerous and far less simple.

However, that danger wasn't only the threat of the Johnson boys. No, the danger was the threat the feelings of Heath's of his " _sister_ ". He cursed under his breath as he tried to roll from her. He placed his arm over his eyes as he tried to think of anything but the sweet smell of Audra's perfume. He hadn't slept a wink since Audra had made her way into his bed. He knew she was just frightened of not only the Johnson brothers but also the place he had pulled her into. No place for a lady of such caliber as Miss Audra Barkley should be submitted to the sin of such a place. Yet, he had done just that. Heath didn't think her crawling next to him was anything but an innocent way of squelching her fears. Fears of the unknown around her.

Audra had heard the loud saloon music, the sounds of drunken men, the girls bringing some of the men back to their rooms. She had felt uneasy from all that she wasn't accustomed to. She wasn't accustomed to and needed not to be now. However, the girl had got them in a state of danger with her innocence of the world around. Her lack of knowledge of rough men, who would take what they wanted from a girl. Audra had done it before when she set out to tempt him in the hotel to prove he wasn't her brother. Heath had no problem with that temptation. There was none as he thought she was his sister then. However, that was when men similar to the likes of Johnsons had tried to take what they wanted from Audra. She was naive then as well.

"Boy howdy, you have no idea of life, little sist..." Heath paused with the word _sister_ at the tip of his tongue. Audra was right to ask him not to use it any longer. It was a lie he was telling himself and her.

Audra's blue eyes slowly opened to stare into Heath's azure eyes. He smiled crookedly at her as she tried to gain her bearings . "Heath, is it morning?"

"Right close." Heath said as he pushed some blonde tendrils of hair from her face. His thumb guiltily played on her thick strawberry colored lips.

Audra allowed her eyes to close with a flutter at the feel of Heath's thumb brazenly caressing her lips. When he pulled away, she licked her lips longing for something that frightened her. She knew he saw her reaction. Thus, he sat up abruptly. It was at that very moment that Audra realized her stupidity in what she must have done to the man by lying in his bed. Heath wasn't her brother. He was a man and she was in his bed. Sleeping beside a man not related to her, Audra was appalled at herself. She tried to tell herself it was innocent. Yet, she knew better. She wanted to be in Heath's arms. She wanted to feel what it was like to lie next to his strong muscular body. She wanted to be held by him in a not so innocent manner. Audra realized at that moment how very childish she had been with not only crawling in bed with Heath but also the whole trip.

Audra wanted to apologize and try to explain. How do you explain to a man that you were attracted to him if that man was supposed to be thought of as her brother? What if he thought she was crazy and disgusting for thinking such thoughts of him? How do you explain to a man that you were playing childish games wanting to keep other females at bay, who were in the house and who could offer Heath more of themselves than she could? Audra wanted to scream at herself for being so ignorant about life. More so, she wanted to scream at herself for tempting Heath on purpose to keep the other females away. Suddenly she realized one certainty about herself compared to Heath. She was being a naive child while she was dealing with an experienced man.

"We need to get movin'." Heath said trying to ignore the sexual tension that was building between the two. It wasn't right lying in bed with a lady such as Audra. No matter how innocent it had began. "The Johnsons are bound to have settled down not thinking of you being in here."

Before Audra could answer, Sally barged through the door. She glanced at the couple on the bed not caring either way. After all, she had witnessed too much immoral acts to feel the two fully clothed people was improper. However, she caught on quickly to how both their cheeks burned red with shame.

"You best be getting your gun, Heath." Sally warned as she helped pull Audra to a standing position. "Candy informed me that Lila told Jacob Johnson where you were. Seems the girl has her tail in a bind since you done ignored her intentions on you long ago. Lila got real jealous of Audra when she saw you bringing her in this place. You know how the girl has always wanted you for more than you were willing to offer. Perhaps, even as a young colt, you shouldn't have rode that mare."

"Sh...oot." Heath stated trying to keep from using foul language around Audra.

She had already heard too much about his past with Lila. He was far from in love with the saloon girl but when a girl offers her services free to a boy of seventeen, well a boy takes her up on it. How was he to know that Lila would lay claim to him after? That only was evident when another girl of the house offered the same services and Heath didn't shrug off her advances either. Lila and that girl had themselves a real cat fight over him. Heath became a stagecoach driver the next day to get away from the quarreling girls and to not cause more unrest in Sally's house.

He pulled on his boots before standing and retrieving a gun belt.

"I know you're fast, boy." Sally watched as Heath checked his revolver for bullets. "But even with a full cartridge, there's six of them. Two in the saloon and four out back. I've done saddled your horse. Had one of the girls retrieve your belongings from the hotel. The horse is out back in the shadows of the alley. But don't know how you're going to get away easily."

"Can your girls help me with a distraction?" Heath asked as he grabbed Audra's arm.

Audra once again allowed the guilt to take over. She held her breath trying to think of a way to help. After all, she had put both she and Heath in danger.

"Sure. What do you have in mind?" Sally walked behind them as Heath peeked out of the door to the back alley. He had to step over a few men, who had passed out drunk or were in a sleep due to being tired from their nightly excursions.

Heath noted the four Johnsons hiding in wait for him. Heath then walked to the door leading into the saloon. The other two Johnsons were readying themselves for the battle. Lila was propped up against the bar looking smug at the boys. Heath quickly jutted his hand through his blond hair.

"Lila won't be working here anymore." Sally added even if it was little conciliation to Heath or Audra.

"What do we do, Heath?" Audra bit her lip as she stared at Heath with trust in her eyes.

"You have to blend in with the other girls, Audra." Heath stated apologetically. "You got to get rid of that fancy dress."

"Do you have something I can put on, Sally?" Audra turned willing to do anything to better the situation.

"We don't have time for that, Sweetie." Sally sighed hating the next statement to come from her mouth. She knew Audra didn't deserve to be done as requested. But it may just save her life. "You need to strip to your underwear."

"Heath?" Audra turned as tears brimmed her eyes.

Heath nodded as he took Audra's hand. He squeezed it. "I'm sorry."

"No. I am for getting us into this." Audra said as she pulled off the dress quickly feeling a rush of shame of standing in her thin undergarments. She looked at Sally realizing how wrong she had been to judge her. Had she been so spoiled and protected that she had come to thinking she was better than others? She realized she had been.

She squeezed Sally's hand in a silent act of asking for forgiveness. "Thank you so much, Miss Sally."

Sally nodded her understanding. The young lady had finally seen the dire situation and the reality of life even if it was a little.

Heath didn't look at Audra. He'd had enough temptation already to contend with. He had to keep his mind clear so he could get through the battle to come.

"She's still too lady like." Candy messed up Audra's hair then grabbed the fancy dress and shoving it into a trunk. "Her face is just too soft and pretty."

"We don't have time to paint her up." Sally glanced at Heath. "Audra still looks like a rose among all of us thorns."

"Here they come!" A saloon girl, who had been peering out the door, cried out just before two of the Johnson boys barged through the door.

"Scream like banshees when the shooting starts, girls." Heath stated with a cool reserve. He pulled Audra around to face him. "I'm sorry, Audra."

"For what?" She barely allowed the words to escape her lips when Heath's lips were on hers in a heated kiss. They both leaned into the kiss more than Heath had planned.

The two Johnsons came through the door with barrels held high as they tried to look around for Audra and the man, who had fought them off the previous day. They were both there according to Lila.

They ignored the kissing cowboy and the saloon girl in the throws of a passionate kiss at first. Then Heath suddenly pushed Audra aside as the boys turned back around. Two shots rang out. Two shots hit the targets with precision.

The kiss was used as a distraction to gain the upper hand on the boys. Audra touched her burning lips realizing what Heath had done. She drew in a deep breath as she felt Heath grab her around the waist. He practically picked her up as he moved her to a safer position. The firing of the guns immediately caused Sally's girls to start screaming as the two Johnson boys lay dead at their feet.

The back door burst open as the other Johnsons hustled through. In the pandemonium, Heath pulled Audra past some of the hysterical girls. He then made his way out the back door quickly as the boys checked on their dead brothers. None noticing that Audra was the lady they were looking for until Jacob Johnson saw Heath and Audra retreat out of the back door toward the alley.

"They're gettin' away!" He yelled trying to make his voice louder than the cries of the saloon girls. He stepped out and shot in the direction of Heath trying to make the escape.

Sally picked up a vase knocking the younger of the Johnsons out before he told of the escaping couple. She watched as Heath mounted his horse effortlessly not even using the stirrups. He pulled Audra up in front of him as they rode off with a thunder. Heath's arm was once again wrapped protectively around Audra.


	26. Chapter 26

**_Thanks again for all the responses to this story. It is greatly appreciated!_**

 _Chapter 26: The Aftermath_

"Are you okay?" Heath could feel Audra trembling as he slowed Charger down. "I think we can rest now."

"No. What if they're following us?" The fear in Audra's voice was audible to Heath.

"They'll be following us, Siii..Audra." The word sister was no longer an option for him. The aftermath of the events at Sally's place,were plaguing them both. Heath pulled Audra tighter to calm her. "It won't be easy fer 'em to follow. That's why we trailed the creek for part of the way. We have to camp. I don't want Charger going lame. It is another days travel before we're in the next town. I can send a telegram to the family there telling what happened last town. I'll leave out some details. "

Heath knew he did little to abate Audra's fear. He found himself caressing her waist as he held her to him. At first, it was an action to try to soothe and calm her. Then his fingers grazed her bare skin between her upper slip and her bloomers. He realized his actions when he felt Audra stiffen under his calloused fingers. Although she didn't pull back, he realized he had crossed a boundary. He did it without thinking. He cursed himself for it.

Trying to take her mind from his previous actions, Heath tried telling her again about being safe to make camp. "They'll be hours behind us. I know the Johnson boys. They are meaner than a pit of rattlers but they won't go without tellin' their Pa of their brothers' deaths and takin' their bodies home."

Heath thought of the repercussions of killing the two Johnson boys. He didn't know which of the two he had shot. He thought one was Matthew and the other maybe was the one that was at the corral with Audra. He wasn't sure due to the quickness of it. He was sure it didn't matter which one, the Johnson boys and their Pa would be seeking vengeance on Heath.

Audra shook her head slightly acknowledging she heard Heath. As Heath pulled Charger to head up a steep hill, he placed his hand tighter to Audra's waist to keep her from falling off. She placed her hand over his. Heath was sure Audra was stopping him from caressing her. Audra wasn't sure if she was stopping him or wanting him to touch her like that again. Either way, something had changed between them after the kiss. The doubts of where they stood was over. There was a definite answer to those doubts now. There was something new that took over with the killing kiss. Something that could never be a building of a brother/sister relationship.

Heath dismounted from Charger then helped Audra down. Audra began to sob causing Heath to reach out to her. "Hey, don't worry. We're at the vantage point. I can see if they are comin'."

"It's not that." Audra gasped as her tears continued to flow. She wanted to tell Heath about how she had been such a foolish girl. She wanted to admit her attraction to him and her not knowing how to deal with such attraction due to never feeling like this with any man. Audra held back thinking Heath would be in total shock about how she was viewing him now.

Heath stuck his fingers under Audra's chin allowing him to lift her head to look at him. " What is it?"

"I can't go into town like this." She lied. Audra was upset about her realized feelings towards Heath. Denial of the attraction was unable to be refuted after the kiss. Audra wrapped her arms tightly around her chest. Suddenly, she felt very exposed in front of Heath.

Heath didn't bother to look down at Audra's state of undress. He knew that he wasn't acting very brotherly to her lately. The kiss didn't help matters at all. _What was he thinking?_

"I'm sorry." Heath walked over to Charger and pulled down his bedroll. "I keep an extra change of clothes. The pants will be really big on you and the shirt can keep you covered. We can tear some of the shirt to make a belt to hold up the jeans on ya."

Heath helped Audra on with his blue shirt. He pulled her hair out from under the collar. Heath swallowed when Audra's and his eyes met. Audra bit her lip as she fought the feeling of wanting to taste his lips again. _What was she thinking?_

Audra fought off the temptation of Heath's lips by taking the pants from his hand. She went behind him to pull on the over sized jeans. After, Heath tore the tail end of the shirt making a long strip to use for a belt. As Heath looped the belt through the loops of the jeans, their eyes met again. This time both knew there was a lot neither of them were saying. Yet, they still kept silent.

"Ain't that better?" Heath stated breaking the deep silent stare.

Audra giggled when she glanced down her body. Heath's shirt hung past her arms and past her knees. The jeans were loose bagging widely on her body. "It is. I don't think anyone will mistake me for a harlot now."

"I don't think that was ever possible." Heath touched her nose lightly with his finger tip. "Now, I've got to get us some food."

"No bullfrog stew. Please." Audra had heard stories of the horror of Heath's camp fire cooking from Nick way too many times.

"Fine. But you don't know what your missin'." Heath teased back as he loosened the cinch on his horse before pulling off the saddle.

Not a hour later, they both sat around the fire eating a rabbit that Heath was lucky enough to kill. Audra kept stealing secret glances at Heath as she thought of how truly handsome he was. His blue eyes were the clearest blue of all the Barkleys. They sparkled with the dancing of the flames. The shape of his face was manly but angelic. Audra figured he must have been an exquisitely beautiful child. His lips...Audra had to look away from his lips.

Her thoughts tormented her of how soft those lips were. She had never been kissed like Heath kissed her. She had heard about that type kiss from a few female friends of hers, who had married. Even if the talk was considered not lady like in nature, females still talked of males. Many times when her female friends spoke of such about such things, Audra had listened as she had little to share of that type of behavior. She had only received kisses appropriate for courting a young lady. Even Scott Breckenridge, a womanizer, had kept his kisses sweet. The only one to ever try to kiss her as Heath had was Evan Miles. She stopped him before he made head way with the kiss. But with Heath, Audra felt an unfamiliar stirring at his kiss. She had always had a lot of male pursuers since she was old enough for boys to come calling. However, not one of them made her stirred up inside as Heath did.

Back at the house of ill repute, when Heath's lips first met hers, Audra was shocked. However, she soon began to return his kiss. Then ever so lightly, Heath's tongue had jutted out to lick the outer edge of Audra's upper lip. His hand had went to her waist but edged up. His thumb slightly brushed her. At this action, Audra felt a sudden burning in her core. That was pleasurable enough but Heath had to intensify the kiss by easing her mouth open with a nip of her lips followed by his tongue pushing through to the inside of her mouth. She remembered feeling dizzy when his tongue teased her tongue slightly. Before Audra could grasp what was going on, Heath shoved her away to pull out his pistol and shoot two of the Johnson boys. Audra realized the kiss was only a ruse to hide her and him. However, the kiss was something Audra's thoughts couldn't escape from. At the very instant of Heath's kiss, Audra felt more like a desired woman than she had ever felt in her nineteen years. She desired more than she ever had as well.

"Is the rabbit to your likin'?" Heath broke Audra from her reverie. She nodded without words. She was glad Heath couldn't see her red cheeks. She was sure she was flushed. Luckily, the fire hid her crimson skin. Heath added in his slow drawl."I'll let you have the bedroll."

"It's too cold for that, Heath." Audra felt her voice waver slightly as she made her next remark. She was unsure it was wise given her state. Thinking back at how she had made her way to his bed the night before, Audra wasn't sure why she was suggesting the same now. However, she knew Heath couldn't sleep in the night air without his bedroll. There was already a chill developing in the evening air. Trying to be mature about the situation, Audra stated with resolution."We can share. We can keep warmer that way."

"I've slept through worse." Heath winked as he rolled out the bedroll. "You can have the bedroll."

Heath didn't want to be next to Audra. It wasn't proper to be feeling as he was. Once again, he blasted himself for his thoughts. The kiss had opened up a Pandora's box that both caused more guilt for him and aroused his senses as a male.

"I haven't." Audra pulled on the edge of the shirt she was wearing. "Call it as you will, but I'm a spoiled female. When we camp with family, I have warm enough attire and blankets."

"I reckon that's true." Heath realized that Audra's attire was very flimsy. Therefore, he placed his saddle down then spread the bedroll over it. He placed a pile of slow burning logs on the fire. He lay partially sitting up against his saddle. Then he patted the place beside him. He had to not think about her being a beautiful lady. He had to think it was too keep the cold air at bay. "Well, crawl over here. We got to get some sleep before heading out at first light."

Apprehensively, Audra made her way over to be next to Heath. She lay her head against his shoulder. Then she told herself she was going to show Heath the truth of her new found feelings. After all, secrets and lies started this whole mess. Her fingers went to his chest where his under shirt opened to expose the curly patch of chest hair. Nimbly, her fingers began to play with his chest hairs.

Heath took in a sharp in take of breath as he felt Audra's touches. Yes, he'd been touched like this before but not by someone he cared so much for. Not by someone he was desiring much more than was allowed by him. _What was she doing? How could he handle this from her?_

Audra knew she was playing with fire. She was sure they both were going to get burned if she kept up her behavior. However, as Heath had done earlier with his own caressing of her waist, Audra was pushing the boundaries between them. She had never did such before. Audra had never wanted to before either. She tried to remind herself, it was not ladylike to do so. But she did any way. She did it to let him know of her own shortcomings when it came to him. If Heath were appalled by the thought, he'd push her away and tell her so. She was sure of it. That was the type of man Heath was. He was a straight shooter much like Nick. Heath was more subtle but Heath still was straightforward and honest. If he turned down Audra's advances, she could put away her thoughts and feelings with shameful regret. The words that flowed from her mouth shocked even her.

"I don't want you to be my brother now, Heath." Audra whispered in a soft low voice. Tears dripped from her long eyelashes to the soft skin of her cheeks. The truth was out now. It was too late to take back.

"I'm not your brother, Audra." Heath closed his eyes fighting again with the demons of temptation. He knew now that Audra was feeling the same. She had not only shown him with her not so innocent touches but with her softly spoken words. He added all he knew to say on the subject. "I never was."

 **A/N Coming soon...Meeting a Cartwright.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27 : Meeting A Cartwright**

The awkward silence that hung thickly in the air caused both Audra and Heath to rethink the night before. They hadn't said anything after letting in each other know where they stood. Albeit, it was a subtle few words from Audra and a half whispered confirmation from Heath, they both knew they were feeling less brother/sister and more ...heck, they weren't ready to go there either. That kind of thinking would get them both in a heap load of trouble. They knew it.

Charger had rested up and was ready to put some time between the Johnsons and the owner on his back. Heath figured it wouldn't be long until they made it to the next town. Then the safety of the stagecoach would make the distance less dangerous.

Little did Heath know, his fears of the Johnsons wasn't a real concern. When Paul Johnson heard what Matthew and Jacob had done trying to steal another man's wife, he was furious. Matthew and Jimbo Johnson would now be grieved by their family because two of his sons tried to take what wasn't theirs to take. The fact was that after bearing Paul Johnson ten sons, Myrtle Johnson was more of factor in the family than Paul Johnson let on to his boys. Somewhere between mumbling about women being a man's property to his seeing his wife bear his children, Paul Johnson fell in love. Myrtle said she wouldn't lose another son to Heath Thomson or Barkley because they were so stubborn and tried to hurt the man's wife. As far as Paul and Myrtle were concerned, Heath had a right to protect his wife from their sons. So it was settled, they would bury their dead boys and not look back on the travesty.

However, that safety was short lived when Heath and Audra heard the pounding of hooves and shots ringing out. They had been riding along the rocks edges over looking the road below. Heath felt the Johnsons couldn't follow their trail that way. When the sounds rang out, Heath knew what was happening. He halted Charger and turned to Audra.

Lowering her to hide behind a boulder, Heath spoke softly. "Stay here, Audra. A stage coach is being attacked."

"Heath!" Audra exclaimed. Heath turned around to face her hoping she wasn't going to be foolish and argue. Her eyes told him she wasn't. "Please be careful. I don't want to lose you."

Heath nodded before pulling his rifle from the sheath on his saddle. He winked at Audra and then had Charger galloping full force down the rocky incline. Audra peered over the boulder being sure not to be seen. She held her breath as she watched Heath aim his rifle towards the oncoming thieves. It was obvious the stage coach driver thought Heath was another thief. However, the jehu stopped his aim when he saw Heath aim his rifle not at him but behind him. The stage driver turned to see a rider drop quickly from his horse. It was mere seconds when another rider went plummeting to the ground.

A passenger from the stage coach was hanging out the window firing his pistol. He thanked God for the help of the blonde stranger as the thieves dropped like flies behind the stage. When the last rider fell, the driver of the stage pulled the coach to a halt.

"Thank you, Son." The jehu nodded his head towards Heath. Then the driver noticed the shirt pooling with blood. "You've been hit, mister."

Heath cursed as he looked down at his arm. He glanced over at the dark haired man, who was stepping from the coach. "Mister, could you please ride up there and get my...my..." _What was Audra to him now?_ He nodded to the boulder off in the distance. He knew he might fall over before he got there. He didn't want Audra frightened any more than she was. "My companion."

The dark haired man smiled broadly. He ignored the man's stuttering thinking it was the blood loss. "Certainly. You saved my most valuable treasures."

As the man stated the words, a beautiful woman with chestnut hair stepped out of the wagon. The lady seemed to be about Jarrod's age or maybe Nick's. Her hair was up in a bonnet held tightly around her head. Only a few loose curls escaped the bonnet showing her chestnut hair. She was tiny in stature perhaps even smaller than Victoria Barkley or close to the same. Her smile was contagious. She held a small boy in her arms. He was a duplicate of the male passenger. The dark haired man smiled broadly with a charming smile. He jumped on a horse, which had made its way towards them. It was owned by one of the stage coach robbers.

Soon the woman was followed out by a man, obviously a gambler by his dress and then a raven haired beauty. The raven haired beauty was about Audra's age. She had an air of sophistication that was similar to the other female's demeanor. Her raven hair curled in tendrils to her waist. Her emerald green eyes sparkled in interest when she spotted Heath. To her, he was one of the most handsome men she'd ever laid eyes on. When her sister had asked her to join her and her brother in law on a vacation in the West, Amy Gannon had dreaded it. However, her sister was dear to her and she reluctantly agreed. Amy feared the wildness of the West was unbecoming to her. However, looking at the blonde cowboy gave Amy a sudden appreciation of the Wild West.

"Should we check if any of the robbers are alive?" The younger female asked as she noticed the four bodies laying in the distance.

"They're dead, Ma'am." Heath stated matter of fact as he leaned against the side of the stage coach exhausted.

The stage coach driver and the gambler stared at one another for a brief few seconds. The dark handsome passenger also arched his eyebrow at Heath's words. They would check the thieves later after he got the man's companion.

Riding up the rocky terrain, the dark haired passenger noted the safe position the blonde hero had put his companion in. When meeting Audra, the man was a little more than surprised to see the companion of the hero was a beautiful female dressed in men's attire.

He stuck out his hand towards Audra. "The blonde cowboy...your companion sent me."

Audra's face immediately changed to fear. "Is he okay?"

"Yes. I believe he is. Yet, he is a little exhausted at his triumphant heroism." The man smiled broadly. For some unknown reason, Audra trusted him. Therefore, she stuck out her hand to the man.

He helped her on his horse before bringing her back down to stage. Audra dismounted quickly at seeing Heath settled against the stage coach. The young female passenger was tending to Heath's wound.

"Heath!" Audra ran and threw herself in Heath's arms. He tucked one arm around her as her arms went around his neck. Without giving it much thought, Audra's lips met Heath's in a brief kiss. Heath swallowed at the feel of Audra's lips brushing with his even if it was a mere few seconds.

The stage coach driver whispered to the raven haired, female passenger. He had noticed the interest of the girl to the blonde cowboy. "Companion. My eye."

"You've been shot!" Audra exclaimed as she touched Heath's blood soaked sleeve.

"I'm okay. Just grazed me." Heath took his good hand to brush back some hair from Audra's face. "Didn't mean to scare ya."

The blonde couple stared at one another oblivious to the others watching. It was the male passenger that broke the enchanted couple from their stare.

"I'll go make sure the men are dead." He said trying to get away from the awkward infatuation of the two young people.

"They're dead." Audra stated as nonchalantly as Heath did. She then addressed Heath. "Now, let me get a good look at that arm."

The stage coach driver rolled his eyes as he followed the dark haired passenger to the thieves. When the men arrived at the bodies, both shook their head at the sight. Each man had a single bullet hole between his eyes.

The older stage coach driver shook his head in awe. "Yep. They're dead." The older man scratched his chin. "We'll go to next town and send out the sheriff. I guess we can cover them up so the vultures won't get at them. That boy sure is good with the rifle. Ain't he?"

The gambler shook his head. "I wouldn't want to bet against him."

They made it back to the others standing by the stage. Audra had bandaged Heath's arm. Heath leaned in to the side of the stage coach as Audra leaned into Heath. It seems Audra was staking her claim due to the pretty female, who kept allowing her eyes to stare at Heath. The black haired girl didn't mean to keep glancing Heath's way. He was completely breathtaking to her in looks and she was in awe of Heath's heroism as well.

"Thanks for all your help, young man." The gambler stuck out his hand addressing Heath. "I'm Edward T. Fletcher."

"Nuttin' to it." Heath stated as he shook the man's hand. Heath didn't know if any of them heard of the name Barkley. However, they were a pretty famous family. Therefore, he surmised not to use the name in front of a gambler, Heath stated calmly. "My name's Heath Thomson. This is my companion, Audra."

The other man, with a charming smile and handsome good looks, introduced him and his family. "I'm Adam Cartwright. This is my wife, Abigail and her sister, Amy Gannon. This here." Adam said proudly as he took the toddler from his wife's arms. "Is my son Ben."

Audra hid her face behind Heath's shoulder. She knew she couldn't hide her feelings at the name Cartwright but she also knew Heath had a poker face. Therefore, she would calm her beating heart while Heath took over any conversation for now.

"Where ya headed, Heath?" The stage coach driver climbed back up to sit on the stage driver's seat.

"Actually, the Cartwright ranch." Heath laughed at the irony. "I think it is called the Ponderosa." He looked at Adam Cartwright. "I worked for your family. I believe. I worked for a man they called Hoss and a younger man about three years older than me, named Joe. I never met you or your father if you are the same Adam, which your brothers mentioned."

"I am that." Adam nodded as he looked at the coach driver. "How about we tie Heath's horse to the stage and let our new friends ride along?"

"Least we could do." The stage driver acknowledged. "Let's get out of here so we can get the sheriff."

The ride in the stage was interesting to say the least. Audra noticed Amy looking disgustedly at her. Then Audra thought of her attire. Audra chuckled slightly realizing she must look a mess. Audra hadn't remembered her outfit in her worry for Heath. It dawned on Audra what a difference a few days make. Before her mind would be obsessed with looking her finest. Now, she only wanted to make sure Heath was safe.

The realization also hit Audra of meeting Adam Cartwright. In front of her sat her very own brother! A brother, who was as charming as Nick and Jarrod. A brother who possessed a kindness that sparkled in his eyes. The man looked as different from Audra as night and day. Where she was blonde and fair, he was dark. His eyes were a deep brown where her eyes were a cool blue. She wondered if any other of her brothers would have her features. The irony was not lost to her that of the five brothers she knew of, the only one not related to her in some way was the one that looked most like her.

Audra chuckled nervously realizing she was being scrutinized by the other females in the stage while looking dreadful. She leaned into to whisper to Heath. "I look terrible. Not even a harlot looks this bad."

With his good arm, Heath pulled Audra closer to him. His words weren't whispered as much as hers. "To me, you look beautiful as always."

Amy rolled her eyes at the words. Surely, the man was trying to make the blonde girl feel more at ease with the more sophisticated ladies present. To Amy Gannon, Audra looked no better than a saddle tramp, who probably held the blonde cowboy due to her wild ways rather than a real attraction. Surely a man of such handsome looks had a strong hunger for lusty ladies. But Audra didn't even fit that. She was dressed as a man. What did these man, Heath Thomson, see in this rough girl? Her thoughts were interupted by her brother in law's words.

"Are you looking for work, Mr. Thomson?" Adam asked curiously.

"Actually.." Audra spoke up. "I have business with your father." She looked at Heath. He nodded for her to go on. "I didn't properly introduce myself. I am Audra Barkley. Perhaps, you've heard of my family from Stockton, California."

"Yes. Of course. Tom and Victoria Barkley." Adam smiled again as he took Audra's hand and kissed it. "You would be my dear cousin as my father was once married to your Aunt Lillian, your mother's twin sister. You favor Victoria in looks. She was a beautiful woman. However, you most certainly hold the blonde marking of a Barkley."

"I'm not so sure about that." Audra teased mysteriously. "However, I have been told I do indeed look like my mother. Forgive me for my state of dress, Mr. Cartwright. It seems that I have been a spoiled girl. Thus being so, I put myself and my companion.." Audra teased as she cuddled up closer to Heath. Amy wasn't going to get her clutches into Heath if Audra could help it. "..in danger with my naive ways. To make a long story short, I am dressed unbecoming a lady due to a hasty escape for our lives."

"Do you care to share?" Abigail leaned forward slightly. "I do love stories."

"Well, I shall tell the story but be forewarned, I am shamed at my stupidity." Audra gripped Heath's arms as she glanced up at him. "Heath was my hero as he is yours."

Before long, Audra Barkley was telling a rather animated tale of her and Heath's adventure in Akinville. She made it sound more comedic than it was and left out details such as the kiss. Surprising Heath, Audra didn't leave out Sally and her girls. Her telling was filled with charm and sophistication showing the lovely lady she was. Audra was charming the socks off of all in the coach with exception of Amy, who was used to the attention on herself rather than others.

"You mean you went into such a house of...sin?" Amy gasped out loud with a dramatic flare. "I could never do such a thing."

Abigail frowned at her sister's smug tone. However, like Amy, Abigail had once been a bit snobbish herself. Adam Cartwright had taken her down a peg or two from her pedestal and she couldn't be happier for it. "I think it must have been quite a harrowing experience."

"Oh, it was." Audra smiled as she added with dignity aiming her words directly at Amy. "If not for those kind ladies, I'd be dead. They were intelligent enough to save us and kind enough to put their own lives at risk for strangers. That is a rare quality in any one. I am eternally grateful to the girls there."

Heath had settled back with his hat over his face listening with a smile at Audra's voice. He wondered if the other Barkleys realized the depth of this girl's charms or the true intelligence and spirit she possessed. Audra rarely showed the side of herself that Heath was getting to know on this trip. She was every bit of a lady with the charm, sophistication, and intelligence wrapped within the beauty of an angel. The wild spirit from their first meeting at his father's grave was back. That part of Audra which she had hidden to appease her family. That part Heath admired, Audra was now revealing to him as the days together forged into the unknown.

Then it hit Heath in the gut of his musing. He wasn't only attracted to the rare beauty that was Audra Barkley. He was falling in love with her.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28: Improper**

Audra watched as the night fell over the land. The moon was full. Therefore, it was lighting the way for the stage coach driver to see. Heath was finally relaxed and sleeping as the stage coach came closer to Wash, Nevada. Audra studied Heath's profile after his Steston fell down to his chest. He was more alluring each time she looked at him. The tingling sensation she felt hit her once again as she studied his face. Heath was every thing a woman would want in a man. His looks were an added bonus. Stunningly beautiful to her eyes was how she pictured Heath. Audra knew Heath wouldn't want that description but that is how Audra felt about his looks. She was sure the way Amy Gannon was staring, she appreciated the same things about Heath as far as looks.

Audra sighed out anxiously wondering what would happen now with the Cartwrights as well as with Heath. As far as the Cartwrights were concerned, would they welcome a new sister already grown? Would Ben be angry at them all for the secret kept? How would she fit into an already made family?

Concerning the Barkley family, Audra was well aware that the same questions had to have been asked by Heath on more than one occasion. She had watched Heath. He still had some questions of his acceptance as a Barkley. Heath seemed to always want to prove himself again and again. She knew her reception would be far less violent and awkward. After all, she was born to a married couple. No one's reputation was questioned unless Ben questioned Victoria's doing in the matter. However, it wasn't a rare thing for children to be placed in care of family due to circumstances near to what Audra's birth was.

Heath and her relationship was a whole different conundrum. What would their steps be now that they felt this attraction towards each other? Could they even act upon such attraction considering the Barkley family? Would it be better to pretend they didn't notice the attraction and try to regain the brother/sister relationship? Glancing at Heath again, Audra knew thinking of him as a brother would be impossible. She was too aware of Heath as a man that trying to think of him as a brother would not happen.

"We're almost there, Ms. Barkley." Adam smiled genuinely. He felt drawn to the young lady known as Audra Barkley. However, it wasn't an attraction as he felt for his lovely wife. It was more of a familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Wash is a dying town but it still has a general store. I don't know if the hotel is worth staying at. I'm hoping the stage can be changed out and we head on towards a better town. However, with night fall, I think we'll have to find somewhere to bed down for the night. You are more than welcome to take the surrey to the ranch with us once we get to the last leg of the journey."

"I do hope to find proper attire. Heath and I planned to take horses the last leg. However, I think after all the trouble, a surrey sounds much nicer." Audra felt her stomach tighten as the small boy reached towards her. It dawned on her the boy was her nephew. She felt the connection immediately. "Please call me Audra. May I hold him?"

"Of course." Abigail handed the toddler over to Audra. The little boy grasped Audra's hair before sticking his thumb in his mouth and closing his eyes to sleep. "Little Ben seems taken with you. He's usually shy."

"He is a lovely child. He looks like you, Mr. Cartwright." Audra grinned at her older brother. She already appreciated the kind man that Adam seemed to be.

"He does. Many people said I should've name him Adam. By the way, please call me Adam, Audra." Adam placed his arm around his wife lovingly. "Mr. Cartwright is my Pa."

Audra noted the difference in referring to a parent. She had always called Tom Barkley the name of father. She had always called Victoria the name of Mother. Heath called his mother Mama. She wondered if she would've called Lillian Cartwright Ma if she had lived. The thought danced briefly in her head before Amy spoke up.

"Mr. Thomson called you his companion. Do you care to elaborate?" Amy stated haughtily. Abigail would've elbowed her sister's ribs had it not been for the obviousness of the action.

The gambler, who had been ignoring all in the carriage, perked up at the question. He was curious of the exact relationship of the two blondes.

Audra glanced at Heath. She smirked confidently as she slid her arm inside the crook of his arm. "He's more like my chaperone. My mother appointed him to be so."

"Things must really be different here than back East." Amy pushed back her hair in a snooty manner. "Mother would never allow a handsome man as my chaperone. It would be considered improper."

Abigail was about to light into her younger sister about treating Audra with such distain. However, she realized Audra could hold her own in the war of words.

"Well, Ms. Gannon, Heath is very close to the family. As you can see, Heath is very talented with a rifle. You'd be amazed at his use of a side iron as well. My mother knows the lands can be wild. A man that has knowledge of a gun can keep her daughter alive. As far as any other problems, my mother also knows I am a lady. She'd never doubt Heath as a gentleman nor I as a lady. Perhaps, your mother views you different than my own as far as being a lady when it comes to handsome creatures of the opposite sex. Or is there some reason your mother would be worried about you traveling with such a handsome gentleman as Heath Thomson is?" Audra flipped her own blonde hair in a mocking manner.

Adam choked on air as Abigail placed her hand over her mouth to keep from giggling. The gambler stated in a low whisper. "Ms. Gannon, I believe your answer should be...Touché, Ms. Barkley. Touché."

Heath poked Audra at her ribs. He whispered. "Behave, little lady."

Audra noticed Heath's wink at her. She knew he was proud of her for holding her ground with the raven haired vixen. It was rather comical how red Amy's face turned at Audra's accusation.

Abigail whispered when she noticed Heath waking up to whisper to Audra. "You deserve that, Amy. Be careful. I don't think you want to spar with Audra for Heath's affections. He is quite taken with her."

Amy turned to Abigail. Her own words low enough for only her older sister's ears."We shall see, sister. Perhaps, a real lady should show the cowboy what life offers without the brashness of a female such as Audra Barkley."

Adam and Heath had started a conversation on the Barkley ranch. Neither man needed to get into the sparring contest of the females. Adam was surprised how much Heath knew of the inner workings of the Barkley Empire. The Barkley family seemed to put a lot of trust in the young man. That trust not ending with the treasure of Audra Barkley. He wasn't sure he could do the same considering how taken Audra and Heath seemed to be with one another. Trust is one thing. Putting someone in temptation's grasp was another.

Audra loved hearing how proud Heath was of the Barkley Ranch. She loved how he knew the ranch was his as much as theirs. She felt a tug of her heart realizing that Heath or she would lose something if they did try to pursue more from their attraction towards one another. Audra suddenly realized how improper her thoughts would be considered. She was unsure she could fight her thoughts because feelings were attached to those thoughts. Audra feared she was falling for Heath in a way that would cause major damage to the Barkley family.

Heath felt Audra's body tremble slightly as she squeezed his arm. Heath's conversation with Adam halted immediately when he felt Audra's distress. He pulled her closer to him. He kissed the crown of her head. "We'll be there soon, Audra. Everything will be fine."

Audra closed her eyes to rest. She realized Heath thought it was anxiety of meeting the Cartwrights. Audra realized she was concentrating more on her new feelings and thoughts of Heath than she was meeting a family. She was exhausted. Therefore, she tried to think of anything but the man next to her. The man who was causing her body to ignite with just a touch of his fingertips to her skin. When Heath felt her relax in sleep, he wrapped her tighter to him.

He looked up at the other passengers. "Last few days have been a tryin' time for her. Audra is a strong lady. But even I'm stressed. We both need a good night's sleep."

"You don't have to explain, Mr. Thomson. You've been shot at as well as escaped with your lives. You need to have a doctor check your arm." Abigail took her sleeping son from Audra's lap. "We can see you're both exhausted. I'm sure Ben will be glad for the company as well as I would love having a female around the ranch."

"Feels odd calling me Mr. Thomson. I may not answer to that. I'm plain ole' Heath. I would love to work with the other hands, Mr. Cartwright. Audra is the one visiting your family. I'm just making sure she's safe gettin' there." Heath noticed how Amy kept stealing glances of him. Any other time, he'd have flirted back as well as been flattered. For some reason, he wished the beautiful raven haired girl didn't have her sights set on him.

"Heath, I'm sure my brothers would love that. You've worked for them before. We'll work out some pay for you while you're there with Audra." Adam settled his son on his own lap.

"I don't need paid. Just would enjoy the work to keep me busy while Audra is visitin' is all." Heath explained as he instinctively raked his hand over Audra's cheek.

Heath faced one reality of their situation. No way would Victoria Barkley let him chaperone her daughter if she knew his thoughts and feelings of Audra. He'd have to fight every thing in him to keep those feelings at bay. He'd have to convince himself that Audra was not available for the likes of Heath Barkley no less for the likes of the former Heath Thomson. The situation was a lost cause for him. He'd have to keep himself as far away from Audra as possible so his thoughts wouldn't go to improper, as Amy had put it. Heath knew he was falling hard and fast. Little in life frightened Heath Barkley. However, falling in love with Audra was terrifying him.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N Thanks for the support. Moving along...moving along.**

 **Chapter 29:From Wash to the Ponderosa**

To Audra's relief, the town of Wash, Nevada had a decent hotel. Although it was ran down, it still was kept clean by the proprietor. She was even more thankful for the small general store that carried clothing. Although nothing was fancy, Audra was thankful for the pale green blouse and hunter green skirt that was available. Audra couldn't resist putting the lovely green shawl over her shoulders. Audra surmised she'd have to buy her mother another gift. The shawl now held special memories for her. She was also thankful for a change of under clothing. Even though, those items weren't as nice as her usual attire. Audra counted them as a blessing.

Amy had bathed and was relaxing in the hotel with little Ben while the others checked out the town.

Abigail teased Adam about the way Heath was over Audra. "Why don't you follow me around like I'm a treasure not to let out of your sight?"

Adam chuckled as he spoke to his wife. "You are my treasure, Dear. However, I believe that is known as envy rather than protectiveness. No matter how Heath Thomson wants to spin it?"

"I believe you're right, Darling." Abigail chuckled with Adam as they watched Heath give any man, who even dared to turn their eyes upon Audra, an icy stare. It was comical because Audra was dressed in men's attire. It was almost impossible not to stare. Heath was too busy thinking of Audra's beauty over anything else.

Only when Adam assured Heath that Audra would remain with their family did Heath finally submit to giving the girl some space. Adam paid for everyone to have a nice bath at a bathhouse, which surprisingly remained open as with the exception of Heath. Heath refused the offer. Once again, the building was run down but the bathhouse was still clean due to the pride of the owners. If the mines had not been slowing down, Wash would be a boom town and a prideful one due to those who owned the businesses. However, the bank was limited on funds. Therefore, Heath telegraphed Jarrod about their situation and asked for a cash note for the bank in Carson City.

Adam Cartwright bought dinner for all of them with the exception of Heath. The stubborn blonde cowboy said he wasn't hungry. They all knew he was but he said he'd prefer to head over to the saloon because he hadn't had a drink in days.

Audra felt much more relaxed and refreshed in her new clothing. This time men did stare at her as well as Amy when they made the entrance into the restaurant. Although Amy was dressed much finer, Audra still held her own in beauty.

While eating their meal, Amy brought up the subject of Heath preferring drink to food. "I'm surprised at Mr. Thomson desiring the saloon to a nice dinner such as this. I guess men such as him prefer a taste of alcohol."

"Heath does enjoy a drink every now and then. At the ranch, we usually gather for drinks in the parlor each night to see how the day went. I think Heath and Nick only drink those few drinks each day. Some days, they are on the trail for so long they go without a drink. They enjoy their time to relax at a saloon as well." Audra defended. "Actually, all my brothers enjoy a drink after a long day. It was how my father did and my brothers follow suit. Heath just fell in place like the rest. We do enjoy that moment to relax and talk about each other's days."

"Honestly, I really wasn't insulting him." Amy realized she had been so short with her words, Audra had to think as much.

"I'm sorry. I have a soft spot for Heath. I won't tolerate any one that insults Heath. I was on the defensive." Audra apologized. She didn't realize her words were confusing to them all. She wouldn't elaborate on why she was protective of Heath.

"How long have you known Heath?" Abigail decided to ask. The girl talked as if he was part of the family rather than a ranch hand as they all presumed. Audra had lumped Heath in with her brothers.

"Almost a year." Audra said dreamily. She couldn't help to remember her antics by Tom Barkley's grave as well as her failed seduction in the hotel. She wondered if that seduction would've failed had the truth of her been known then. "Heath rode up approximately eleven months ago."

Adam looked over at Abigail. She shared the same questioning look as he. That wasn't very long to entrust a ranch hand with their daughter or for the man to be sharing drinks as a family. However, it was the Barkley business not their own. Adam didn't like the sudden protectiveness he felt for Audra. He didn't know where it came from but she felt like family.

As they continued talking, the gambler, who was a passenger on the stage coach, came up to their table. "Pardon me for interrupting your meal. However, my dear, Ms. Barkley, I do wish you had warned me of your companion's talent with cards matching his talent with a gun. Mr. Thomson seems to be on a winning streak over at the saloon. I know when to fold and get out of the game. He's about cleaned us all out."

Mr. Fletcher tipped his hat as he smiled walking away. Audra bit her lip as tears welled up in her eyes.

"What's the matter, Dear?" Abigail noticed as she touched Audra's arm. She hoped that Heath Thomson didn't have a gambling problem.

"I should've known. Heath would never take charity. I wasn't thinking about getting all our money stolen except what Heath won in a poker game in Akinville to get us this far. I'm sure he spent the last of his money on the outfit I'm wearing. I'm sure he kept just enough to get in a card game. That's why he isn't eating or going to the bath house." Audra held her breath. "He's so stubborn. Heath has to be hungry."

"I offered dinner." Adam tried to calm the distressed girl. "Let me guess, Heath won't be beholding to anyone."

"Yes." Audra half smiled. "As I said, Heath is stubborn. My brother Jarrod will get us a cash note in Carson City. Heath can cash that at the bank. We'll be fine. He already paid for our hotel rooms. But until then, I hope he wins enough to get him a decent meal or he won't eat."

"Oh my." Amy spoke up. "Does that mean he won't get his arm checked out by a doctor? I know we both cleaned the wound well but Heath seems to be favoring it."

Audra stood up. "If you will excuse me, I need to go check on him."

"I'm sorry, Audra." Adam placed his napkin on the table as he stood. "I promised Heath I would keep you with family. Why don't you go with Abigail and Amy back to the hotel? Little Ben needs a good washing up after his meal. I could use a drink."

Audra smiled down at the toddler, who has smeared mashed potatoes all in his hair. She peered at Adam. "Will you please convince him to go to the doctor?"

"On my word of honor, I will make sure Mr. Thomson sees a doctor." Adam winked as they all stood to go to the hotel.

After escorting the females to the hotel, Adam made his way over to the saloon. He saw a large crowd standing around one table. Adam made his way to watch the game but he did so without allowing Heath to see him. Just as Mr. Fletcher had said, Heath was winning. He had a large sum of bills laying on the table before him.

"Royal straight." Heath laid out his cards confidently.

"YOU'RE A CHEAT!" A man jumped up as he tried to pull his gun.

Heath was standing with his gun already out. The crowd was surprised how fast the blonde cowboy was. "Mister. I don't cheat. I could see you bluffin' before you got your first card."

"He's telling the truth, Frank." The sheriff had been watching the game as well. "The boy is just good. That's all there is to it." The sheriff then turned to Heath. "I guess you won enough of our town folk's money, boy."

"I reckon." Heath gathered up his winnings. "Didn't mean to cause no trouble."

Adam watched as Heath tilted his hat to the men around him. A very beautiful saloon girl made her way to Heath. "Heath, could you use some company."

"Not this time, Faith." Heath winked at her. "Been awhile but not tonight."

"You got you a girl, Heath?" Faith twisted her auburn hair around her finger flirtatiously.

"Don't know yet." Heath winked adding his lopsided smile to his gesture. "Workin' on that."

"Lucky girl." Faith sighed out. "Many a girls going to be disappointed from here to California."

"I wasn't that bad, Faith." Heath laughed as he tossed a coin on the bar.

"No. You were that good." Faith laughed as she watched Heath walked away. Adam stood back listening curiously. Heath seemed to have been a man well traveled."Dang, Sammy. Now what do I got to look forward to in life? I ain't seen hide nor hair of Heath for at least a year. Now, he's gone and got him a real gal. I guess getting him the last name of Barkley sure did come in handy in settling him down."

"He may be back." The bartender, Sammy, stated. "Heath said he was workin' on it. Didn't say he had her."

Another saloon laughed as did Faith. Faith added. "Men, don't get it. Us females like us some good lookin' men as much as they want a good lookin' woman. If Heath wants a girl, that gorgeous man will get her."

Adam's keen sense of listening caught immediately referring to Heath as a Barkley. What was that supposed to mean? Why was the man claiming to be a Barkley to some and a Thomson to others? Did Audra Barkley know of Heath's scheme? Was romancing Audra Barkley part of whatever Heath Thomson had planned? Was the meeting with Ben Cartwright set up by Heath Thomson by taking advantage of the innocence of Audra Barkley? Adam Cartwright let the questions roll over and over in his mind. Heath seemed like a nice enough man. He saved all their lives. However, the words of the saloon girl stuck out to Adam. Something wasn't right? Adam was sure of it.

Adam waited until Heath left the saloon to let his presence be known. He clamped Heath on the shoulder. "I promised Audra that you'd go see a doctor."

Heath glanced over his shoulder at Adam. He smiled crookedly. "I guess I better do what the lady says. I've been on her bad side enough on this trip." Heath glanced over at Adam. "You don't have to follow me."

"I told Audra I would. Sorry." Adam smiled widely.

The doctor cleaned the wound. "You stiff?"

"Little." Heath said as he placed back on his shirt. "I reckon I can work it out."

"Don't doubt that." The doctor eyed the young man. "With as many scars you got, I suppose you've worked out a lot of pain."

Adam hadn't seen Heath's back so he looked up curiously but never spoke a word.

"None of your business, doc." Heath said sharply. "Your job is to look at my arm."

"Put a sling on." The doctor shook his head. "It was cleaned good before. I cleaned the wound again. Here is some..."

Heath shook his head no. "I don't take pain medicine if I don't hafta. I'll be fine."

Adam waited on Heath as he said he had to stop at the general store. He made it plain he didn't need Adam shadowing him. Adam was relieved when they made it back to the hotel. He started to go into his room when he noticed Heath knocking on Audra's and Amy's door. Adam walked in his room but waited on the inside with the door partially open. He was worried more about Audra being around Heath now that he heard the doctor's words.

"Audra." Heath smiled at the blonde beauty standing in the door way. "I got checked out by the doc."

"Good. Did you eat?" Audra leaned against the door frame knowing she couldn't invite Heath in due to Amy Gannon sharing their room. Besides, it was getting more and more inappropriate for her and Heath to be alone in a hotel room.

"I ordered a meal to be sent up and I have a bath being poured in my room." Heath handed Audra a small package. "I got you something. It ain't what you usually wear to bed. But I bought you a sleepin' outfit. Mother would want you in some sleep clothes."

"Thank you, Heath." Audra licked her lips as she stared at Heath. "You're always thinking of me."

Heath raked his finger down Audra's cheek running his finger softly down Audra's chin. "You have no idea." He whispered.

Audra's cheeks flushed red. "Maybe I do a little." Audra swallowed nervously. "I guess I better head to bed."

"Yeah." Heath closed his eyes as Audra closed the door. He leaned his forehead against the wood of the door. "What are we doing, Audra Barkely? What are we doing?"

Adam closed his door when he saw Heath walk to his own room. Adam rubbed his chin thoughtfully. Did Heath just refer to Victoria Barkley as Mother? "Indeed. What are you doing, Heath Thomson?"

The next day they were well on their way to Carson City. To Adam's dismay, Heath was the one who got the bank draft. Something was definitely up. The Barkleys trusted this man way too much. Adam would keep an eye out. He still had a nagging feeling that there was more to the story. He also felt he needed to protect Audra Barkley.

Adam would speak to his brothers about what they knew of Heath Thomson. Then he'd speak to his father about his worries. For now, he'd act like he knew nothing of a suspicious nature.

Audra purchased a new dress to meet Ben Carwright. To Heath's surpise, it was much more simple than her original dress. To Heath, Audra looked more beautiful without the embellishments of fancy clothes. Actually, Heath was realizing that no matter what Audra wore, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on.

Audra's eyes scanned the large ranch named Ponderosa. She was impressed with the size of the ranch. It was even bigger than the Barkley Ranch. Yet, when they came to the Cartwright home, it looked less fancy, less pompous, less extravagant. She glanced over at Heath. He had told her he worked for the Cartwrights but she also remembered him saying he never saw the house or met Ben. Heath had went on a drive with Joe and the one called Hoss. Audra had learned his real name was Eric but he was called lovingly Hoss.

"Boy howdy." Heath let out a whistle. "This is some ranch."

"I hear the Barkley ranch is nothing to shake your head at." Adam stated as he watched the surrey weaving its way towards the Cartwright house.

"Not as much land. But lots of other investments is what the Barkleys enterprise is about. Mines, orchards, lumber, horses, and cattle. But this is more like what I'd envision as a piece of paradise." Heath grinned. "The house looks more to my likin' too."

"My Pa likes log cabins. I designed the house with him in mind." Adam dismounted his horse then walked to the surrey to help the ladies down. Heath followed him.

"You designed it?" Heath was impressed. "I like it from what I see."

"I studied architecture and engineering." Adam noticed Heath smile fading slightly. Heath couldn't help wondering if rich folks knew how blessed they were to get education. "What is the Barkley house like?"

Amy made sure Heath helped her while Audra was helped by Adam. Amy held on to Heath's arms longer than necessary. Heath smiled politely then stepped up to stand next to Adam.

"Fancy." Heath answered lowly. "Like Tom Barkley wanted the world to know he had his share of wealth."

Adam raised his eyebrow at the way Heath seemed to resent the way Tom Barkley had built his house. He would let it go. Knowing Heath the short time he did, Heath didn't seem the type to judge anyone. But then again, there seemed to be a lot of mystery surrounding Heath Thomson.

Audra gripped her hand in Heath's as the reality hit her. She would be meeting her father soon. Heath squeezed Audra's hand back. "I'm here, Audra."

Abigail nodded to the couple's hands. She wanted to alert Amy to give up her childish game of pursuing Heath. Amy's face flushed a little with irritation. The game had just begun and her sister was already thinking she was a loser.

Amy Gannon almost wanted to claim victory already. Heath Thomson was a man she wanted. Amy never knew a man to not fall victim to her play. She had saw the simpleness of Audra Barkley. From her the cotton nightgown she wore to bed to the simple dress she wore today, Audra was no match for the sophisticated Amy Gannon as far as Amy could see.

Adam was relieved when he saw his father's and brothers' horses tethered to the railing in front of the house. Something was up with the blonde couple. Somehow, the Cartwrights were going to figure it out together.


	30. Chapter 30

_**A/N When I was a little girl, I met my real father for the first time at age Six. I walked into the room and my mother said come meet someone. I can't explain it but I crawled into this man's lap. I was a shy child but there was a need to be held by this man. He wrapped his arms around me an I never feared him. I know Audra is much older but I do believe in natural pull between children and parents in some cases. I felt it in my youth. I based this chapter on that moment.**_

 _ **Chapter Thirty: Unknown Feeling**_

Audra felt her stomach full of twittering as an older man stepped out onto the porch. She felt as if her heart was going to explode. Audra loved Tom Barkley as a dear father. She was his princess. However, seeing the older man, Audra knew immediately this had to be Ben Cartwright. There was an instant yearning to run to him and wrap her arms around his neck. She refrained fearing the man would think she was a lunatic.

Ben Cartwright had seen a lot of things in his long life. He had seen his beloved wives die. He had watched many a young man and even young woman be claimed to the wildness of settling land. He had raised three sons practically by himself. He had even felt the grief of losing a child as well as a grandchild. However, nothing prepared him for the sudden gripping of his heart when he saw the beautiful blonde girl standing mere feet from him.

His heart raced with unknown reason and feeling as he stared at her. Ben Cartwright fought the urge to make haste to the young girl and wrap her in his protective arms. He knew not where the feelings were coming from. All Ben Cartwright knew was he was drawn to the young girl. Perhaps it was because his own daughter shared this girl's birthday. Perhaps, his own daughter would've looked similar since their mothers were twins.

Audra held tightly to Heath's hand wanting his strength to flow into her. She remembered his steel determination to have the Barkleys accept him. She knew it was very different. There was no illicit affair. There was no starving neglected childhood. There was no past of wars, abuse, or torturing in a prison camp. All that Audra felt was an unknown feeling of not knowing where she belonged. _Was she a Barkley? Or was she truly meant to be a Cartwright?_

Adam watched curiously as his father gripped the porch railing. He sensed his father was caught in a memory of his own daughter's death. Adam never realized how Audra's presence would strike a match to the fire of those old sorrows. Ben had admitted to him many years ago that he wanted a girl in the family even if it was a granddaughter. A little girl to replace a lost daughter.

Ben loved his daughter in law. He loved his grandson and sons. He even loved Hoss's fiancé as well as Joe's girlfriend. That girlfriend would also be his daughter in law. Ben was sure of it. However, he had not had the pleasure of seeing a girl child grow up in the Cartwright family. The blonde girl standing in front of him reminded Ben he had once had that chance to have the pleasure of a daughter.

Adam was relieved to see Joe then Hoss come out of the house. The two brothers stood on each side of their father. Ben seemed to gain strength from those sons. He stood straight as he watched his oldest son approach.

Audra felt a sudden leaping of joy in the pit of her stomach. Her brothers were standing next to her father. One was young and thin much like Eugene in build. The other was a big robust man, who had the clearest blue eyes. Eyes that spoke of a similarity to herself. Audra smiled despite her anxiety. Heath let loose of her hand as he handed her over to the Cartwright men.

"Pa, this is Audra Barkley and Heath Thomson." Adam approached his father cautiously. He wasn't used to seeing Ben Cartwright falter in his own steps. "Did you get my wire?"

Ben nodded that he did receive the wire. Ben stepped forward extending his hand to Heath first then to Audra. However, Audra felt overcome with emotion. She threw her arms around Ben and kissed his cheek. Ben didn't know why , except the fact that she shared a birthday with his beloved Anna, but he needed to hold her. He refrained as he felt Audra release him.

"It is nice to meet you, Mr. Cartwright." Audra tried to keep her voice from betraying her. However, there were tears shaking her speech.

Heath stood up trying to help the woman he loved. "Ms. Barkley was told of your daughter Anna a few weeks ago. It is still a fresh memory for her."

"I see." Ben's eyes twinkled as he reined in his emotions. "Come in. Join us for dinner."

"May I clean up first?" Audra linked her arm in Ben's. "I feel like I've been on a cattle drive with my brothers and Heath."

"Of course." Ben again felt his heart flutter at the young lady's presence. "We have running water in our home. I"m sure Tom Barkley provided the same for his family. He spoke of that often."

"We do have running water." Audra smiled back at Heath, who was standing back from them. "Are you coming, Heath?"

"No, Audra." Heath rubbed the back of his neck. "Iffin' Joe or Hoss doesn't care to show me, I'd like to go to the bunkhouse."

Audra's face fell solemnly. "Oh. Of course."

Audra understood that Heath was playing the part of Heath Thomson and not Heath Barkley. She felt a little sadness touch her heart at watching a man named Candy lead Heath away from her family. _Her family?_

Dinner was pleasurable but awkward. Ben couldn't help but be in awe of the young Ms. Barkley. Amy Gannon had met the Cartwrights before. She didn't care for their lack of culture as far as she was concerned. Although Heath Thomson was similar to the Cartwrights, to Amy Gannon, his looks more than made up for his lack of being an Eastern gentleman.

Audra was relieved that Ben and her brothers were catching up with Adam and Abigail. Ben was more than enjoying his grandson being at the Ponderosa. Audra soon found she was drawn to the large heart of her even larger brother. Hoss was a big a teddy bear as much if not more than Nick. However, Hoss didn't hide it as Nick did. He wore his heart on his sleeve and didn't mind showing his soft side.

Hoss's real name of Eric was revealed some time during the conversation. Audra liked that name. She decided that she would refer to Hoss as Eric from that day forward. Hoss seemed pleased when Audra addressed him as such.

"Eric, do you know of my brothers, Nick and Jarrod?" Audra grinned as Hoss's face lit up with her question.

"Sure remember them a little." Hoss grinned widely. "Little Joe and Nick were always into trouble. They were the same age almost but Joe was a little fella."

"Nick wasn't." Joe laughed at the memory. "He wasn't as big as Hoss but he sure was bigger than me. I remember many a black eye when visiting the Barkley ranch."

"Heath has sported a few black eyes from Nick too. Of course, he's given as much as he's got." Audra realized her faupe so she changed the subject quickly."I know you never met my brother Eugene. He was born less than a year before I was. He was only a baby when you were last there."

"That's rather close in age of having children. I guess women of the west take their child rearing serous." Amy snipped.

Audra laughed a little not letting Amy's remark faze her. "They do indeed. Yet, my mother was from the East. She is quite the dignified woman."

"Regal." Ben spoke up. "That's how I'd describe Victoria and Lillian. They were regal in manner. Tom and I were lucky to have those beautiful ladies even look our way." Ben grasped Audra's hand. When he did, he felt an instant connection. "You are much like how I remember them. Lovely in looks but beautiful inside as well."

"Thank you. That means more to me than you know." Audra's eyes misted up.

Amy wanted to roll her eyes at the young blonde girl. _Why were so many of the men in the West fooled by Audra's supposed charm? "_ Is Heath not going to join us for dinner? Is he now only a hand since you've come to the Ponderosa?"

Audra drew in a ragged breath. "Heath came along to make sure I got here safe. He never intended on visiting as I am."

"Why did you come?" Amy raised an eyebrow. "I mean you haven't really said."

The Cartwrights didn't care for Amy's forward questioning. Even though they were all curious, they preferred Audra tell the reason for her visit without being provoked to do so.

"Simple. My mother told me the story of my cousin Anna." Audra squeezed Ben's hand. "I felt connected due to the circumstances of our birth. I wanted to meet the family my mother spoke about. She was very close to her sister Lillian. I wanted to meet all of you after that. Is that okay, Mr. Cartwright?"

"Of course, Audra. I prefer Uncle Ben. I am more than pleased to have a Barkley visit. It has been years but Victoria used to write me telling me of family. She often mentioned you." Ben sighed in a deep melancholy. "I fear my lack of response stopped her correspondence. I was a very busy man. I had no female to write for me as Tom did. Three sons to raise and taming this land took my time. I apologize for not coming to your father's funeral. Tom Barkley was a great man."

"No reason to make excuses or apologize, Uncle Ben. I know it would've been difficult to make that trip. As far as letters, I understand that as well." Audra felt oddly sad for having to call him Uncle. However, she would keep up the charade for the sake of Victoria Barkley. She adored the woman. Audra didn't want Ben to think ill of her mother. "I understand."

The dinner went on without talk of things not needed mentioned. Audra found herself very much liking the Cartwrights. Ben very much found Audra endearing. When they retired for bed, Audra placed on her gown Heath had purchased her. She missed Heath very much. She longed to tell him of the dinner and how getting to know the Cartwrights went.

Audra glanced out the window as she thought of how much she was happy for the trip. She noticed Heath leaning against the barn smoking a cigarette. Audra watched him for a while as she thought of how very different the Barkleys had reacted to him. She realized the Cartwrights didn't know of her being family. Yet, Audra knew they'd treat her kindly. That was not a doubt. At first, Heath wasn't treated fairly by any of them but her mother. Even with that fact, Heath had been asked to prove his worth as a Barkley by fighting for neighbors that he didn't even know against the railroad. She wondered why he had bothered at times to even become a Barkley. Audra was glad he did.

Heath looked up to see Audra in the window. He had eaten dinner with the men in the bunkhouse. There was an easy camaraderie with the men due to hard work and stories of that work. Even if he had enjoyed a nice meal, good conversation, and a winning poker game, Heath missed Audra immensely.

Audra pointed to the front door so Heath would go there. Heath nodded as he threw down his cigarette. He distinguished the burning end of the cigarette with the toe of his boot before heading to the front of the house. When he got there, he wasn't sure if he should knock at such a late hour or what. He didn't have to worry about it as Audra soon opened the door to greet him.

"Hey." Audra said in an almost bashful way. She had a robe borrowed from Abigail around her as she stepped into the crisp cool night air. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Audra.' Heath leaned his back into the large post on the porch. He propped one of his booted feet back against the bottom of the post. "Did you have a nice time at dinner?"

"They're real nice." Audra stepped up cautiously. "I wish you would have ate with us."

"This is your time, Audra." Heath reached up to push a tendril of stray hair behind Audra's ear. "Things are different for us now."

"I know." Audra swallowed nervously.

"The Barkleys won't like it none." Heath admitted as he stared at her.

"I know." Audra stepped up closer to Heath. "Can we worry about the Barkleys when in Stockton and just worry about us here?"

Heath's answer came without words as he bent his head to capture Audra's lips with his own.


	31. Chapter 31

_**Chapter Thirty One: Fatherly Manner**_

Heath refrained from pushing Audra's back against the front wall of the porch. He wanted to press his body tightly against hers revealing how much he desired her. He tried to calm his desires at the feeling of Audra's lips touching his own. Heath knew passion filled kisses were too much for the young Audra Barkley. He knew how to make a woman desire him in a kiss. He was trying to not kiss Audra as such. She was a lady. He preferred to treat her as one.

Heath Barkley thought he was in love many times before. Suddenly, he realized the past loves were so much less than how his heart was reacting to Audra. The feelings for Audra were becoming insurmountable.

Audra's moan at Heath's nipping at her lip caused Heath to proceed with caution. He blasted himself for kissing her more aggressively at the house of ill repute. He had let himself get carried away with the fact he was kissing her. Heath knew he would have to tread lightly now with Audra. He would have to keep himself in check when it came to kissing as well as any other desire that crossed his mind of the girl.

Audra angled her head so Heath could deepen the kiss. He felt her body brush up against his own body. That caused him to forget all about his own acts of a gentleman. The kiss became more sultry as Heath's tongue bade Audra's mouth for entrance. Audra entangled her fingers in Heath's hair as she relished in the kiss. This time, her tongue responded to Heath's tongue. It was as if their tongues were fighting for dominance with a torturous seduction. Heath's good arm enveloped Audra as he pulled her body closer to his own body.

The kiss would have became more heated as neither blonde wanted to relinquish the feeling of allowing their mouths to perform the lust filled actions. The kiss only stopped due to Ben Cartwright clearing his throat in a threatening and fatherly manner. Heath and Audra jumped back from each other after breaking the overzealous kiss.

"It is getting late, Mr. Thomson." Ben stated with a definite authority. "I think perhaps it is too late for a young lady to be out. Now that you've said your good night to Ms. Barkley, perhaps you should take a nice dip in a cold trough. I'm sure the dust from today has gathered on you."

A red hue soon shot up Heath's neck and past his ears. He got the meaning of the dip in cold water. Heath drew in a deep breath as he rocked cautiously on his feet. It wasn't the first time Heath had been chastised by a father over a girl. However, it was the first time he was ever nervous or cared about it.

"Yes, sir." Heath watched as Audra nodded to him before scurrying past Ben into the log cabin.

Ben watched Audra race up stairs before he turned his attention back to Heath. "I am going to take Amy, Abigail, Little Ben, and Audra to Carson City tomorrow. She mentioned at dinner that the Barkleys should have a wire waiting on her. Audra would probably like to go shopping as well as take in a nice lunch. I presume you'd prefer to work on the ranch with my boys." Ben was letting it be known that Audra would be with him and far from Heath.

"Yes, sir." Heath pushed his hands deep in the front pockets of his jeans. "I believe so."

Heath turned to walk away but Ben beckoned to him. Heath stopped in his tracks to hear Ben retort. "The next time you call on my niece, Mr. Thomson. Make it during an appropriate hour."

Heath swallowed as his stomach churned with nerves. "Yes. Sir. I will see that I do that."

Ben Cartwright watched the young handsome cowboy head over towards the corral before he made his way back into his home. He felt an urge of protectiveness come over him when he walked out to see Audra and Heath in a heated kiss. Adam had already spoke to him and his sons about Heath Thomson. Adam wasn't sure but something felt off with Heath's story because of overhearing him being referred to as a Barkley once and calling Victoria mother when speaking to Audra.

Ben sat down in front of the fireplace. He stared at the flames as he thought of his protecting Audra. He once again thought perhaps it was the caution of Adam. However, Joe as well as Hoss said they didn't know what was up. Heath Thomson was no more than nineteen when he worked for the Cartwrights. He wasn't there long either. Yet, he seemed to be an honorable young man. A young man with great work ethic and an even quicker draw. Heath was known to be quiet and a loner but nothing malicious seemed to be in him.

Joe and Hoss agreed all they really knew of him was he was an extremely hard worker. They had even thought of keeping Heath Thomson on due to Candy's suggestion. Yet, the boy joined up with a posse ran by Frank Sawyer before they mentioned they wanted him to stay even after the long cattle drive was over. Joe did reluctantly mention Heath's parentage.

 _"Candy wanted to assign some men under him. That didn't work out as the men didn't like taking orders from the boy." Joe Cartwright had settled down with the other men in the family after the women had retired to bed._

 _"Sure thing, Pa. Heath Thomson wasn't here long but Candy was impressed with his handling of the cattle and horses. Especially horses." Hoss added to the discussion. "Candy wanted him to be in charge of the taming of the wild horses. Candy came asking me and Joe personally about the thought." Hoss rubbed his stomach then scratched his head as he thought out loud. "But Joe is right. Men didn't cotton to takin' orders from Heath."_

 _"Why? Was it because of his young age or he have a bad attitude?" Ben didn't get to know the young man at all. Heath had left to the corral while leaving Audra with them._

 _"No. Heath was born on the wrong side of the blanket, Pa. That's why he was a loner and why some of the men didn't take to him. No less take orders from him." Joe glanced up at his family. "That don't bother you none does it, Pa?"_

 _"No, son." Ben informed him with a smile. "_ _A man can't be blamed for what his parents do. We'll just watch over Audra Barkley in case. I feel drawn to the girl. I reckon because of your sister being born on the same day. "_

 _"I feel the same." Adam agreed. "I happen to like Heath. He was a real hero for us. Great shot and nice attitude. Humble actin' and quiet."_

 _"Like I said, let's see how he is with Audra first. The Victoria Barkley I remember wouldn't send her daughter with a man she didn't trust completely." Ben stated before he headed to bed._

Now Ben wondered if it was Heath who he wanted to watch to protect Audra from or if was just a deep want to protect Audra in general. The young beautiful lady had gripped his heart in a fatherly manner _._

As far as Heath Thomson was concerned, that answer was soon to come.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32: No Lie to Tell**

Audra had spent a wonderful day with Ben, Abigail and baby Ben. Even Amy seemed to be less snippy when Heath wasn't around. Audra didn't blame the girl for wanting Heath. He was quiet the catch. Only a few months or even weeks ago, Audra would've been helping Amy Gannon to court Heath Barkley. Now things were different. Heath was everything Audra wanted in a man and so much more than she could imagine. His kissing alone was legendary to Audra.

Audra's face flushed slightly red at the thought of last night's kiss. It was so very sensuous. Audra couldn't think of a better way to describe the kiss. The kiss let them both know they wanted a lot more from one another. What that was even Audra couldn't fathom at the moment. All she knew was that kiss curled her toes and made her knees weak.

On the other hand, Heath Barkley was getting in the swing of being Heath Thomson again. His sling being removed so he could head out with the other hands, he had worked a hard day without having to prove his worth. His work stood for itself like it used to before he became a Barkley. There was no hidden agendas, no worries if he was doing enough, no second guessing his every move. He put in a long day and proved worthy of any other man on the Cartwright ranch. The easy camaraderie was something Heath missed. He had felt it when he worked with men in the past. No bossing or making difficult decisions. He did what he was told and he did it well.

At the same time, Heath couldn't help but think of his kiss shared with Audra last night. Once again, Heath had to chastise himself for letting things get too heated too quickly. He was usually very much in control of such things between him and a woman. With Audra, he felt he was losing all control of his heart, body and soul.

Heath also missed working with Nick. They had went from enemies to best of friends to brothers in a short period of time. Nick knew what Heath was thinking as well as Heath knew what Nick was thinking. It was a true partnership between the two at the Barkley Ranch. Most of the time, Nick still bellowed like he was in complete control. Everyone knew better and that included Nick. Heath wasn't one to argue with Nick on most things. After all, Nick knew how to run the Barkley Ranch and how to run it well. Heath had to admit it though. If it came time to argue, he'd argue with Nick.

Heath realized he missed being on his own ranch working with his own brother. On the other hand, Heath realized he'd give that all up to be with Audra. If they pursued this unusual relationship, that just may be what he had to do. Heath put that notion away as the men made their way into Carson City. Hoss offered all the men a round of drinks for a job well done. Adam and Joe agreed to help foot the bill. They had to admit that Heath Thomson was a great cowboy and knew his way around the ranch. Therefore, they would see how things played out before judging the man on a few words of uncertainty.

Audra had her arm linked in Ben Cartwright's arm as they walked away from the local mercantile. Audra had purchased a few more items to make her stay at the Ponderosa easier. However, it wasn't the shopping that brightened her day. It was being with Ben and enjoying his kindness. He was every thing any girl would find perfect in a father. He was like Tom Barkley in many ways but still so much a rugged man on the outside. Tom was a rancher, who liked to indulge in the money he made. Just as Nick, Jarrod, and Eugene would indulge in their things of enjoyment, Tom did the same. The leather vests, expensive cigars, nice suits, engraved rifles, and jingling spurs all told of her brothers' wealth. She had to admit even her pension for shopping for elaborate dresses was showing the Barkley wealth. Heath had his own nicer clothing than before he became a Barkley. However, he still had this rugged down to earth nature about him. Heath still didn't over indulge in things. That was the same with Ben Cartwright and his sons. _Her family_.

As Heath rode into town with the rest of the Cartwright crew, Audra was making her way to an early dinner with Ben and the women. Amy wouldn't admit it but she was enjoying Audra's company. That didn't stop her from wanting Heath for her own. Amy was craving Heath's attention and he wasn't making any attempt to give it to her.

"Ben, there are the boys. Why don't you go have a drink with the them?" Abigail suggested. "Let us ladies go try on some of the new dresses from the East. Pearly's Dresses has some of the newest fashions in. We can get our own dinner. The boys will want to eat after a drink. Go enjoy yourself. You've been at our beck and call all day."

"I loved chaperoning you fine ladies around. But I must admit that a drink sounds good after this hot day. We sure made a longer day of it than I thought." Ben admitted as he looked over to the men dismounting their horses and heading into the saloon.

Audra grinned sheepishly when Heath tipped his hat and grinned at her. She felt her face flush hot when seeing Heath. The stirring inside her seemed to increase each time she saw him. Ben glanced between the two before heading to the saloon. They were smitten with each other. That fact only caused Ben a confused question. _Why would Victoria Barkley send her lovely and very much innocent daughter with the very handsome and obvious experienced in life cowboy?_

Audra, Amy, and Abigail made their way to the dress shop. Little Ben was fast asleep in the care of a hired nanny for the day. Ben decided after the lunch, Abigail deserved a break. He hired a local woman known to babysit for towns people. Therefore, the ladies were free to shop until their heart's content.

In the dress shop, Audra couldn't help but make her way to the more delicate of items. She fingered the silk and satiny robes as well as blushed when she spotted various corsets hidden near the back of the store.

She wondered if Heath would like his wife to wear something as such. Audra shook slightly as she thought about Heath's kiss the night before. She was innocent to a lot of things. When Audra reached the age of courting, Victoria Barkley had told her that men were to be cautiously dealt with when things of female and male relations were concerned. A girl wasn't to entice a man too much. A girl was to be charming but demure. Kissing was to be chaste and hands were to be kept from roaming. There was nothing chaste about Heath's kissing. His hands roamed a couple of times during the kiss last night but she felt Heath pull back before she had to stop him. The fact was Audra didn't know if she was in the right mind to stop him. She was so caught up in the kiss and his touches, she hadn't even thought of putting a stop to it.

Victoria had told Audra never to put herself in the position for a man to be tempted. Audra had learned that lesson the hard way on her nineteenth birthday party with Evan Miles. She had dealt with that harsh reality with Scott Breckenridge as well. The fact she was feeling something for Heath as she never felt before made Audra realize that Victoria Barkley didn't bother to tell her of what a female may feel when it came to such things. Nor did Victoria warn her how a man may react or how his body may react to such delightful kissing. Audra bit her lip feeling rather embarrassed at noticing Heath's own body's reactions to hers. She admitted it frightened her a little but it also made her feel a little pleased she could make Heath react to her in that way.

"Something to wear for Heath?" Amy had been rather amiable all day. However, she didn't like the way Heath paid all his attention to Audra despite Amy's best effort to look enticing for Heath. "I mean in the late hours and all."

"No." Audra gasped. "I mean..we haven't. Ever. Never. I haven't. I guess maybe he has but not with me...I mean."

Audra's stuttering embarrassed her. Therefore, she made her way from the intimate clothing to the more reserved dresses without saying another word to Amy. The raven haired girl smirked as she thought to herself. _At least I know Heath hasn't been tied down to her due to her seducing him. I still have a better chance with the gorgeous cowboy._

Inside the saloon known as Mac's place, the Cartwrights, Heath and the crew were settling down to have a drink. Ben made his way to sit at his table with his three sons and Heath.

"Evening, boys." Ben greeted them all with a jolly expression. He noticed Heath's face and ears turning a shade of red. _Good the boy is aware that I'm gonna be watchin' him._

It wasn't long until the Cartwrights were enjoying a friendly game of poker with Heath. Candy had also joined in the game. Heath was soon winning.

"I forgot how good you are at this, Heath." Candy laughed with a shake of his head. "You always were good at hiding behind that poker face. Never could tell when you were bluffin."

Heath raised his eyebrow still not changing his expression. "I like readin' people, Candy."

That caused Ben to sit up and take notice of the boy. _Was Heath Thomson a con man playing on his beautiful niece's innocence?_ His question only esculated when a lovely saloon girl made her way to Heath.

"Hello, Heath." The girl leaned against Heath. "Where's your lady? She let you off that leash she has you on?"

"Lila." Heath frowned as he addressed the girl. "Reckon Sally lettin' you go must of brought you here. I'm playin' some poker is all. Don't rightly want to be bothered by ya."

"I see." Lila ran her hand slowly over Heath's chest. "I guess you being a son to a rich Barkley makes you too good for the likes of me. Didn't hear you complaining when you were just Heath Thomson, the bastard, and not Heath Barkley,Tom Barkley's bastard."

Heath grabbed Lila's hand as he realized her words. Those word would be difficult to explain to the Cartwrights. "Lila, I suggest ya leave me alone. I reckon you bout gettin' me and Audra killed is why I don't want ya near me."

"Pssh." Lila jerked her wrist free from Heath's grasp. She looked at the others around the table. Then she looked at the few saloon girls standing near. "You girls better deal with the others at the table. This one here is as good as a lover as they come. But now he likes bringin' his own girl along because he's too good for us." Lila turned back to Heath. "You may be a Barkley now, Heath. But you were no better than a bastard when you were with half the girls at Sally's house and you ain't no better because some rich family took you in as their own. Their daddy's whelp is all you are. That's all you will ever be."

"That's enough, new girl." One of the saloon girls approached. "We don't treat the costumers bad. Mind your place unless you want to lose another job."

Lila scoured at Heath before leaving the table. Heath looked around the table. He took in a deep breath. "I ask that ya'll save questionin' me for after I speak to Audra."

"Why? So you can get your story straight?" Adam leaned in glaring at Heath. "We won't let you harm her."

"I appreciate your concern for Audra. I really do, Adam. I have no lie to tell. " Heath slid his hand to collect his winnings. "But you get this straight, that girl means more to me than ya'll can imagine. I need to tell her that ya'll heard what Lila said. Now, iffin' ya excuse me." Heath stood up. He picked up his hat placing it on his head.

Heath found Audra coming out of the dress shop followed by Abigail and Amy. Heath grabbed her arm as he pulled her away from the girls. The Cartwrights followed him out of the saloon. They made haste to catch up with Heath before he forced Audra to go along with his story. They weren't about to let the con man take advantage of the girl no matter what his game was.

"That's far enough, Heath." Hoss warned. "I suggest you let her go."

All four Cartwrights and Candy, the foreman, stood in a semi circle stopping Heath from moving.

"What's going on, Heath?" Audra could tell he was trying to speak to her alone. She could also hear the anger in Hoss's voice.

"Now. Listen, Hoss." Heath let go of Audra's arm. "It ain't what you think and this ain't the place to speak on it. I know you can crush me like a grape but I don't plan on fightin' ya. The only other way to do this is to draw on each other. I'm faster than any one of ya. I promise ya that. I don't cotton to drawin' on good men like any of you Cartwrights. But I aim to protect Audra and I aim to speak to her without ya'll present. Now, ya'll go back to the Ponderosa and try to trust me."

"Please." Audra glanced from Heath to her family. "Please let me talk to Heath."

"I don't trust him with you, Audra." Ben stepped forward cautiously. "Heath isn't who you think he is."

Audra saw Lila come out of the saloon to stand on the porch. She had a wicked smile on her face. Audra felt her tears brimming her eyes.

"No, Mr. Cartwright.." Ben noticed Audra didn't address him as an uncle. "I'm not who you think I am."


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33: A Daughter, a Sister**

" _Please." Audra glanced from Heath to her family. "Please let me talk to Heath."_

 _"I don't trust him with you, Audra." Ben stepped forward cautiously. "Heath isn't who you think he is."_

 _Audra saw Lila come out of the saloon to stand on the porch. She had a wicked smile on her face. Audra felt her tears brimming her eyes._

 _"No, Mr. Cartwright.." Ben noticed Audra didn't address him as an uncle. "I'm not who you think I am."_

At the pleading of Audra, Ben agreed to go back to his house before speaking about her statement. Heath was still not trusted. Therefore, the Cartwright brothers flanked him as they road back to the ranch. Abigail and Amy were told that Audra would be traveling back with them by horseback. Neither girl questioned it as they had seen the exchange between Heath, Audra and the others.

Back at the Ponderosa, Audra dismounted her borrowed horse and immediately made it to Heath. Joe Cartwright stepped in front of Heath trying to block him from Audra. However, she pushed past him and fell into Heath's embrace.

"I'll be there for you, Audra." Heath wiped the hair from her face. "It'll be okay. Trust me."

Adam shook his head at how Heath had Audra wrapped around his finger. He doubted the Barkley girl would even believe what they had heard. However, it was Audra who claimed she wasn't who they thought.

Ben and his sons took Audra and Heath to the study to speak about the events of today. They settled down with silence before Ben finally spoke.

"Can you explain who you are Heath?" Ben asked noticing Audra was upset too much to speak. Besides, it was Heath they were questioning not her. Even if she was the one claiming to be the mystery.

Heath wrapped his arm tightly around Audra allowing her to collect herself. "I'm Tom Barkley's bastard son."

Ben furrowed his brows together. He connected Heath's last name to something Tom Barkley had once told him. "Leah Thomson was your mother?"

Ben's sons looked on curiously. They wondered what their father knew of Heath Thomson and this tale of his.

Audra and Heath's head snapped up to Ben. Heath swallowed as he thought of how many people may have known about him and did nothing. "Yes, Sir. So you knew of my mother. Did you know of me too?"

"No, son. I only knew of Leah. Tom and I were best of friends at one time. Brother in laws who came to understand each other. Tom told me of Leah. She was the only woman he ever broke his marriage vows with. He loved Victoria beyond any woman. However, he confessed to me that Leah was such a kind and beautiful soul. According to Tom, she was a rare beauty on the outside too. He felt guilty for breaking his vows but not of loving Leah. He told me if Victoria wasn't his first and truest love, he'd have gladly been married to Leah."

"He didn't know about me. My mama told me about my father on her death bed bout a year ago." Heath raked his hand through his hair nervously. "Mrs. Barkley has accepted me as her own. A letter proved my claim and Tom Barkley's sister, Rose, knew about me. She had visited mama and met me."

"Rose Barkley kept that secret from Tom?" Ben shook his head with a sigh. "A child hidden from his father. I can't imagine Tom would've liked that. He loved all his children. No doubt you would've been his pride too, Heath. Actually," Ben paused as he looked at Heath closer. "you look a lot like Tom. A whole lot."

Hoss had heard his father complaining of Heath and Audra's heated kiss. He grimaced as he looked up. In a very low voice, Hoss spoke. "Wouldn't that make you and Audra brother and sister? I mean we all got different mama's too but were still kin."

Audra knew how disgusting it sounded to them. She could see the look on her brothers' and father's face. It was time for the truth. She gathered her courage and spoke up. "Rose had a lot of secrets. We found out many of her secrets through a satchel she carried. She called it her satchel full of truths. It held many a secret."

Ben and the boys waited for Audra to continue. They noticed Heath rubbing Audra's arm as he looked at her in a not so brotherly manner. Heath felt all eyes on him and he hoped Audra would soon set them straight. He didn't like the looks the other men were giving him.

"Mr. Cartwright, would you please sit down?" Audra touched the seat on the other side of her. "What I'm about to tell you is going to hurt but I hope by the time I'm done with the truth, you'll understand some. I also hope that it brings you some joy when it is all said and done."

Ben sat down beside of Audra. The Cartwright sons gathered around the fireplace as they looked at the girl, who was broken up but tried to remain controlled.

"Do you want me to tell them, Audra?" Heath crooked his finger under her chin. He made her look at him. "I don't want you upset like this."

Audra shook her head back and forth. "No, Heath, I'm the one that asked you to bring me. I'm the one that needs to do this. Just stay here with me."

"I ain't gonna go anywhere." Heath kissed Audra quickly on the lips despite the Cartwrights feeling uncomfortable by the situation.

Auda bit her lip before turning to the men then she looked directly at Ben. "Rose kept the secret of Heath. However, Lillian Cartwright took a secret to her grave as well. Only Victoria Barkley and Rose Barkley knew of that secret. Lillian gave birth to a healthy baby girl." Audra saw tears brim in Ben's eyes.

"My Anna died later I suppose." Ben took in a long breath of air. "She was buried before I could see my daughter."

Audra took Ben's weathered hand in hers. "Victoria Barkley's daughter died. Anna was Victoria's daughter. I was Lillian's daughter. " Ben stared in disbelief as he looked at Audra.

"You're...You're.." Ben's voice cracked as he squeezed Audra's hand.

"I'm Audra Cartwright in reality. Mother, Victoria Barkley, raised me as her own. It was at the request of Lillian Cartwright. It was her dying wish. Mother was grieving her own loss. Please understand that, Mr. Cartwright. Please. She was grieving and I was her source of comfort. A baby girl to raise in place of her baby girl. Tom Barkley was never told and neither were you. Heath and I found out and confronted them." Audra spoke quickly as she felt she needed to get it all out.

Ben soon had tears streaming down his face. Without a word, he pulled his daughter to his chest. Heath relinquished Audra to her father. Ben and Audra sobbed as the news set in. He raked his hands through his lovely daughter's blonde hair. Heath stood up and addressed the boys.

"She ain't my sister. We don't share no ma or pa. But you do. Audra is your sister, boys." With those words, Heath left the house so that Audra's family could grasp the information. It wouldn't be like him coming to the Barkleys. The news of Audra would be joyous not filed with anger and betrayal.

Ben rocked Audra slightly as he whispered. "My golden girl. My sweet golden girl."

Adam knew it was the truth the minute Audra had said the words. He had felt a connection to the young lady. It was a connection he wasn't sure about until now. He now was sitting where Heath had been. His arms embraced his father and his sister. Joe and Hoss were smiling even if their faces were covered in wet tears. They couldn't believe they had a little sister. It was too great of a revelation as far as all the Cartwrights were concerned.

Audra finally pulled back from Ben. She smiled warmly as Ben took his hands to wipe her tears. "I wanted to get to know you first. I was afraid of you hating Mother for what she did. I never wanted you to think ill of her."

"I don't." Ben admitted in a strained voice. "Don't get me wrong, I am angry at not knowing you. I am angry those women took the decision from me. However, I know the times then Audra. My sweet Audra." Ben pulled her to him again. He wanted to just hold her a while longer. He grasped Audra by the shoulders after he pulled her from the hug. "I raised my boys alone. It was difficult. I have no idea how hard it may have been to raise you alone."

"According to Aunt Rose and Mother, Lillian was afraid you'd have to give up the dream of the Ponderosa. She didn't want you to do that. She also wanted her daughter raised by a woman. Mother and Lillian were really close from what I gather. Perhaps, it was Lillian's way of making her sister not grieve as well." Audra bit her lip as she peered at Ben. "I was raised spoiled and cherished. I had a wonderful life." She glanced around realizing Heath had left. "Tom Barkley raised me in luxury. His own son was raised in poverty. I am blessed and refuse to complain of having a loving family. I realize that. I do wish I had know you sooner. I really wish..." Audra drew in a deep breath. "I wish I had known my Pa sooner."

Ben broke out in laughter as he wiped his own tears. "I have a daughter! I have a girl! Boys, you have a sister!"

Heath could hear the celebrating from inside the house. He stood by the corral as he smiled at the happy reunion going on for Audra.

Amy Gannon noticed the cowboy leaning on the corral fence. She had eavesdropped on the meeting of the Cartwrights with Heath and Audra. She walked up to him hesistantly but with a purpose.

"She's your sister." Amy leaned on the fence as she stared at Heath.

"No. Not really. Audra is a Cartwright. I'm a Barkley." Heath didn't look over at the raven haired beauty. He really didn't have to explain to her. He did for Audra's reputation.

"But that explains why Victoria Barkley would send her daughter with you. This one you both call Mother feels you are brother and sister. How will you two explain to her about this relationship of yours? Am I assuming correctly in the fact the relationship is not known by the Barkleys?" Amy grinned wickedly as she plunged in the knife with her words.

Heath felt the pain of betrayal he was doing to the family he loved dearly. "Just happened that way. On the trip and all. No explanation really. I fell in love with Audra."

"Love?" Amy took Heath's hand. She rubbed the top of his hand. "Will the Barkleys be so inclined to accept your love for Audra? Oh, I don't doubt it is love, Heath. That is love from you. You're an experienced man. I can tell. On the other hand, Audra is a naïve girl. Even I am less naïve than her. She lives in fairy tale dreams in her sweet head. It is all romantic thinking of the relationship with you. What you need to ask yourself is Audra in love with you or is this relationship something to take her mind of her life being a lie. Are you setting yourself up for hurt? Are you setting up your family up to being betrayed? And Audra, does she feel the same or are you taking advantage of her vulnerable state right now?" Amy watched as Heath stared out over the dark corral. She added to dig the knife in much further. After all, a wounded animal was much more dangerous but once gained trust, would be very loyal. She knew she was wounding the cowboy. "I heard what was said. You are Tom Barkley's bastard. You've been hurt enough. I'd hate to see you hurt more for a girl, who may not even want you when all this is over."

Amy walked away leaving Heath to think on her words. Heath was thinking about what the girl said. However, it wasn't if he'd get hurt or not. He'd been hurt before. This hurt would be the deepest if Amy Gannon was right. That is not what caused Heath trepidation. Heath's mind was on one question.

 _Could I betray Victoria Barkley's trust for my own selfish desires like my own father once betrayed her?_


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34: Family Matters

Jarrod Barkley was used to taking care of family. He was used to being in control. He was always the one each family member came to if something was needed. He felt more like a father to his two youngest siblings than he did a brother. Eugene and Audra were so young when their father was killed. Audra was only twelve and Eugene was only thirteen. Jarrod had stepped into the role of father because he was twenty seven at the time. His mother was strong but she had grieved so for his father. She hid it well but Jarrod knew.

Being used to being in the father role when it came to Audra, Jarrod felt more than a discomfort when he received the telegraph telling of stolen money and the Johnson family. Heath had left out a lot of details as his usual way. Jarrod sent more money to Carson City. The truth of their destination being revealed by Heath. Jarrod felt a little anger towards his half brother on allowing Audra to get her way in this ill conceived adventure. _Half brother_.

It had been a difficult time allowing Heath into the family by Nick. However, once allowed to be considered a brother, Nick Barkley threw his whole heart into the idea. Jarrod played his role correctly even though he still had a difficult time coming to grips of the new brother. No one knew of his difficulty with Heath. It wasn't that he didn't love his younger brother dearly. Jarrod knew how to handle family matters. However, he wasn't sure how to act upon family matters when it came to Heath.

It was more the fact that Jarrod had no clue what role he was in this young man's life. After all, he was Pappy to the others even Nick. But to Heath, he was something else. Heath seemed older and wiser to the world than Nick despite being younger. At times, Jarrod faced that Heath was wiser to the things of the world than he himself was. Therefore, Jarrod Barkley had set up higher expectations for the new brother than he had his other siblings. Jarrod didn't want to do such a thing but it was how his reaction to Heath was. Heath didn't need a lot of Pappy time. He needed a brother and a family. Jarrod was more than willing to provide that for him.

Yet, in the back of Jarrod's mind, he wished Heath needed him more. Jarrod laughed at himself. He didn't feel needed by Heath like the others needed him. This caused Jarrod to chastise himself. The few times that Heath had needed Jarrod, Jarrod had let him down tremendously. Jarrod could do a mental list of Korby Kyles, Matt Bentell, and Gil Anders. Heath needed Jarrod to be a brother then. Instead, Jarrod was the lawyer. It was ingrained in him. Heath seemed to understand. However, Jarrod realized it would have been a bonding time if he had been a brother more than a lawyer.

Perhaps, it was time to be that brother not the lawyer and most certainly not Pappy. He took in a deep breath before confronting his family with the news of Audra and Heath being at the Cartwrights for an extended week.

"What do you mean Cartwrights?" Victoria gasped. "Ben knows?"

Jarrod kindly took his mother's hand as he kneeled in front of her. "Mother, it was not planned. It seems Heath and Audra went with every intention of remaining anonymous."

Nick snorted out. "Like that ever works."

"Nick, enough.' Victoria chastised her second son. "Go on, Jarrod."

"Well, Heath has traveled that area..." Jarrod continued but this time was interrupted by Eugene.

"Of course he has." Eugene rolled his eyes. "Another adventure of the great Heath."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Nick harrumphed. "Heath can't help it that he had to work all over."

"You'd normally call that a drifter." Eugene crossed his arms over his chest.

"Boys.." Victoria wanted to get back to the subject of her Audra. "So some body knew Heath. That doesn't explain why they had to tell of Audra being Ben's daughter. As brother and sister being Barkleys is self explanatory." Victoria wrung her hands. "I can't believe Heath did this."

"HEATH!" Nick exclaimed. "This seems like Audra's idea. I'm sure Heath just went along to keep her safe."

"Of course." Eugene groaned.

"Do you have a problem with Heath?" Nick turned to Eugene. "Because I ought to bust you."

"Well, big brother." Eugene stood up face to face with Nick. "I don't have problems with Heath as much as I do how you are acting over him. All I've heard all week on the ranch is Heath does it this way..Heath would do this. You're acting like he's...he's..."

"WHAT!" Nick threatened.

"You're acting like he's father! That is exactly how you thought of father. Father was put on a pedestal by you and your doing the same with Heath. Just wait until another hero falls!" Eugene quipped as he poured himself a drink.

"I don't see him as a hero!" Nick answered quickly. "We just work good together is all."

"Please stop this." Victoria didn't know how the conversation was based on Heath.

Of course, she did blame him for all the mess. It was easier than blaming Audra. After all, Victoria felt insecure when it came to Audra now. Her heart ached and she felt weaker than usual. Victoria realized the situation was making her ill. She'd have to mention that to Dr. Merar. Victoria hadn't felt this ill at ease even when Tom had been murdered. She grieved, she grieved mightily then. However, this was an entirely different situation. She felt out of control. Victoria Barkley had never lost control even at her deepest darkest hour. Now, she didn't know how to get her lovely daughter to accept the past as it was. The past.

"Long story short." Jarrod knew his mother was at her wit's end. He had never saw this side of her. She kept her grief and pain hidden most times. "Heath and Audra are at the Cartwright ranch. Ben knows of Audra being his daughter. Audra said to tell all she loved you and that she is very happy to meet this side of her family. She said not to worry. She'd be back as your daughter."

Victoria sighed out in relief. "I wish she had spoken to me. I'd have went with her. I guess what is done is done. Are we going to meet them there?"

"I think you should allow her space, Mother. Heath will take care of her as any of us brothers would. I'm sure." Jarrod wanted to run to wrap Audra in his protective arms. However, he was trying to be less Pappy to Audra and trust Heath as a brother would.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heath was invited to eat dinner with Cartwrights. Now that he was confirmed to be a Barkley, Ben Cartwright wouldn't think of having Tom Barkley's son in the bunk house for dinner. Heath was scrutinized more by the brothers and father of Audra. He was befriended warily due to the sudden need to protect the only female Cartwright by blood. Heath understood the reasoning behind the boys' and father's reaction. He'd felt the need to protect Audra as well yet it wasn't brotherly especially now.

It was Ben Cartwright that spoke to Heath first of his intentions with Audra. He met Heath by the corral after dinner.

"I have been thinking, Heath. Victoria Barkley has no clue of your relationship with my daughter. Does she?" Ben didn't hedge around. He was blunt just as Heath preferred.

"No, sir." Heath twiddled with the wooden corral fence. "Mother thinks of me as a son and Audra a daughter. 'Spose Audra is her daughter no matter the circumstances of her birth. Truth is that I feel same about Victoria. I can't think of her but as Mother. I had a Mama but Victoria is Mother none the less."

"She won't like it. Huh?" Ben watched Heath think quietly before answering.

"I don't want to betray Mother like Tom Barkley did. I don't want to rip her heart out again." Heath closed his eyes trying to think of how to get the feelings for Audra to stop.

"I don't think it is the same at all. You love my daughter though. Am I correct?" Ben placed his hand on Heath's shoulder. It surprised Heath but he didn't pull from the comforting gesture.

"Yes, Sir." Heath answered without hesitation. "Don't mean she feels the same. Audra is young and free spirited. She's confused. Audra has been thrown into a fast moving whirlwind and don't know how to calm the storm."

"You're afraid you're just an anchor in the storm. You fear that once this storm is settled, Audra will not be in love as you love her. She won't need her anchor any more." Ben could understand how the boy could be doubting. The blondes had to be feeling overwhelmed about their lives. Audra's circumstances of her birth had to hit Heath of not knowing his own father.

"Yep." Heath exhaled deeply through his nose. "Don't want her feelin' nothin' she don't feel nor her worryin' over it."

"I see. If she doesn't feel the same after it is all said and done, what will you do?" Ben could tell by the boy's make up that he'd sacrifice for any one he loved. He figured Heath would leave Audra to be a Barkley. He'd leave the ranch. When Heath didn't answer, Ben spoke up. "She loves you, son. I may not have been her father long but I know when a girl is in love. She's head over heels."

"I think so too." Heath bit his lip nervously. "Which leaves me with a whole other heap of trouble. My family is gonna explode or Audra and I are gonna have to..." Heath couldn't think of not being with Audra now. But it was obvious the hurt this relationship would cause their family. He hated causing others pain.

"I plan on taking all of Audra's time while she's here." Ben cupped Heath's shoulder. "That will give you both time to think on the future. By the way, we have a rodeo coming up in couple of days. We do it as a charity for whatever the town needs. Audra asked if we could do the rodeo for the orphanage this year. I'd like for you to participate. You can represent the Barkleys in it. Having a big name like Barkley being involved would help others joining up. How about it?"

"Sure." Heath was glad for the reprieve from worry of being in love with Audra. "What does it entail?"

"Bronc busting, trick riding, cattle wrangling..." Ben laughed. "A few other not rodeo related such as pie eating and target shooting. But I warn you, Hoss has never lost at pie eating, Adam always wins targets, and Joe has the bronc busting down."

Heath chuckled. He was thankful that Ben was trying to alleviate his worries of Audra and himself. "Well, Adam and Joe will not see the ribbons this year but I figure Hoss still has his winning in the bag."


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35: Rodeo**

Audra was happier than she could imagine being around her Cartwright family. She met Joe's girlfriend, Emily as well as Hoss's fiance, Gretchen. Like Abigail, all the girls excitedly welcomed Audra into the family. They all knew they'd be sister in laws to the blonde beauty. They all chatted while preparing for the day's events.

"How have you been keeping busy around the ranch while the men are out?" Gretchen asked curiously.

Audra had spoken to them of her life at the Barkley ranch. It seems the new Cartwright blonde girl was into charities, parties, and taking care of Stockton's orphanage.

"Honestly, I found a cheap pirate novel." Audra laughed. "It is so badly written but it gives me something to do. Ben offered to get me other books but I didn't want him to bother."

"Adam and I are planning to incorporate a library when Adam draws up the renovation on the cabin. The men are too busy to read now but Ben loves good novels. We plan on talking Ben into taking it easy in his later years. I think it will be easy with the more grandchildren he gets. He loves spending time with little Ben."

"That sounds wonderful." Audra agreed as she packed more into her basket. "Ben and I spoke about me visiting more in a few months. I do plan to keep in contact with my family here."

"Speaking of family, you have gorgeous brothers, Audra." Gretchen teased.

The lovely red head was outgoing. She wasn't like her counterpart Hoss. She was loud and a joker. Audra immediately loved the boisterous red head. Emily was not shy but soft spoken. She was lovely in looks but not quite as lovely as Audra. She loved Joe with all her heart. It was obvious she was eagerly awaiting for Joe Cartwright to propose.

"I do." Audra agreed as she placed a jar of her pickles in the basket she was preparing. She knew if she couldn't get the number of her basket to Heath, he'd remember her award winning pickles. "On the Barkley side too. I'm putting in my pickles. Heath will know it is my basket that way."

"Do they look like Heath?" Emily asked shyly. "He's rather gorgeous."

Audra giggled slightly. "No. My brothers are all dark like our mother. Well, their mother. Well, since our mothers were identical twins, that still fits. Heath looks very similar to his father, Tom Barkley."

"So the closest brother to look like you is one that isn't your brother at all." Gretchen interjected as she made sure to put her special cake in her basket. No way would Hoss not know her basket.

"True." Audra chuckled. "I am very happy he isn't though."

"The trip made that huge a difference?" Emily quietly asked. "No offense, Audra. But I'm adopted as are my sister and three brothers. We aren't related at all but by blood. However, they are my siblings without a doubt. I see them as nothing else."

"I understand, Emily. However, Heath and I only met approximately a year ago. We were adults. I know if we were raised together, we'd be as you are with your family. Jarrod, Nick, and Eugene are my brothers without a doubt in my heart. I also know given a few more years or even months, Heath and I would be as brother and sister. But we weren't there yet. I can't explain it. I guess with all the confusion of the truth about me, I started leaning on Heath more as a friend than a brother. I wanted the man that knew what it felt like to find out about a new family suddenly. I didn't want the protective brother like my brothers would be. I wanted a friend to help me, comfort me, be there for me. He was and along the way, I began to see Heath differently."

"I'm sorry. You don't have to explain it all." Emily apologized. "I guess being adopted made me not understand. However, it is different as you said. I'm happy you found us. Ben is walking on clouds of happiness. He is so proud of his daughter."

"I love Ben already. I can't explain how much the man and my brothers mean to me now." Audra packed some more in her basket. She had requested Ben get her a duck to fix for Heath. She wanted so much to please him. "Thank you, Abby for you help." Audra had began to call Abigail the nickname the Cartwrights called her. "I am a terrible cook."

"What are sisters for?" Abigail happily packed Adam's favorite things in her basket.

"If Heath were my beau, I'd no worry about my contents in my basket." Gretchen teased Audra. "We would be too busy to eat."

"Gretchen!" Emily and Abby exclaimed.

"What? I love my Eric. But admit it, that Heath Barkley can make the truest of women swoon." Gretchen noticed Amy as she said the words.

Gretchen had met Amy before. She didn't like her then and she didn't like her now. Gretchen hoped Audra noticed the raven haired beauty's interest in Audra's boyfriend.

Once gathering near the corral, each girl was given a number for her basket. It was supposed to be secret but Audra didn't want to take chances.

"Number Three." Audra flirtatiously whispered to Heath. "Got it?"

"Yep." Heath felt desperate to touch Audra some way, some how. Even if the touch was as simple as pushing her hair from her face.

However, the Cartwrights were taking their role of brothers seriously. Hoss and Joe were practically saddled to Audra's side while Adam was always watching closely. Ben was the ever doting father basking in the idea of having a daughter. He was spoiling Audra worse than the Barkleys already had.

Heath felt like a dead animal being circled by buzzards. He figured Audra and he wouldn't get a moment alone if the Cartwrights had their way. Ben had already made it plain the night before that Heath wasn't escorting his daughter back to Stockton alone. Ben would ride along with his horse until they caught the train then he'd hire an adequate chaperon for his daughter.

Audra was absorbing every second she could with her new found family. That didn't stop her longing to be near Heath nor did it deter her wanting some alone time for the new pleasure of kissing Heath Barkley. Therefore, she made sure Heath knew to bid on the number three lunch. The winning bidder would be who she ate lunch with. Each basket lunch was anonymous so Audra made sure Heath knew her number. The bidding would take place after the rodeo events.

Amy watched carefully as Audra whispered to Heath. Then the Amy made her move.

"Oh my." Amy frowned. "I see someone has the number three."

The portly woman behind the table with all the baskets looked up. "Sweet girl, it doesn't matter. The bidding is anonymous."

"I know." Amy feigned innocence. "But number three is my lucky number. I really hoped this picnic dinner would bring me a husband."

Amy played right to the woman's sense of romance. The woman smiled charmingly. "Well, it is secret bids. I'll just change the number for you."

"Oh thank you so much." Amy hugged the strange woman. As she did, she slipped Audra's pickles from Audra's basket to hers. "I truly am excited about this."

The woman was glad to help the beautiful girl out. Besides, the man who got her basket would be more than happy considering the gorgeous young lady.

Heath easily won the target shooting contest. Heath wouldn't usually show off his sharp shooting talent but when he saw Audra cheering him on, he showed off slightly. It caused Ben to question him, which Heath didn't want but he answered honestly.

"I was a sharp shooter in the war." Heath raked his hand nervously over his neck.

"You were a kid!" Ben looked at the young man. "Tom.."

"Wasn't there. Tom Barkley wasn't there." Heath peered at Ben. "Mama needed the money. There is a lot you don't know about me, Mr. Cartwright. There is a lot my family still don't know about my past. It is for their benefit as well as mine."

"If you and Audra continue to get serious, will she know?" Ben spoke sincerely to the young man. He wasn't trying to belittle Heath but he did want to make sure Heath knew that Audra was going to have a secure future.

"Yes. Sir." Heath nodded his head. "I don't know where Audra and I are going with this. I know where I want to go. But I need to weigh out the whole picture to myself and Audra. I won't hold back or lie to her. But right now, this time is about Audra gettin' to know ya'll. I don't want to make her worry about us."

"Good plan, Son." Ben squeezed Heath's neck. "Now. Let's see how good you are bronc busting. It is the next event."

It wasn't as easily won as the target shooting but Heath still came out the victor in the bronc busting contest. Although Heath did stay on the mustangs the longest, he was thrown against the wooden fence. He ignored the pain as he readied for the next event of calf roping. Heath didn't know why he was trying so hard. He wanted Audra to be proud of him. Besides, every time he won an event, she was there kissing him sweetly after. Even if it was on the cheek, it was something he was looking forward to after each win.

Heath lost the calf roping to Joe. He was a few seconds under Heath's time. He felt his ribs aching but it was worth getting second place when Audra ran to hm.

"You did great, Heath." Audra wrapped her arms around Heath's neck. "You won two ribbons."

"I think I deserve more reward than an ribbon." Heath teased as he leaned to whisper in Audra's ear. "I can't wait to be alone with you so I can get my reward."

Audra blushed before she felt her brother, Hoss, pulling at her. "Come on lil' Sis. I want you cheering me on in the pie eating contest. You can be hugging all over your beau some other time. Heath needs to come courting you like a gentleman."

Audra tiptoed and kissed Heath's cheek before being pulled away by her big hearted brother. The day was turning into a wonderful day with family. Still the blondes wanted to explore their new relationship without worry of facing the Barkleys. With the Cartwrights, there was a protectiveness but not the guilt of being together like they knew being around the Barkleys would bring.

When the bidding started, Audra glanced at Heath. He secretly held up three of his fingers for her to see. She smiled broadly as basket number one was bid out. All the ladies, who made baskets, were lined up in a random order awaiting their basket to be bid. Then came basket number three. Audra didn't recognize the contents except when her pickles were pulled out. Heath made sure to outbid the others. Audra's face fell when he did. She knew she hadn't packed roast beef and potato salad. There had to be a mistake.

It was obvious how the mistake was made when Amy Gannon was announced as the maker of basket number three. Heath stepped up as he took Amy's arm in the crook of his. He glanced at Audra apologetically. Audra fought back tears as she smiled despite the circumstances.

Gretchen was basket number two. Therefore, she whispered to Ben. "Audra made duck. I'm sure she wouldn't want to be with a stranger."

"I figured she wanted Heath to bid." Ben watched as Amy chatted animatedly with Heath.

"Yeah well looks like the raven haired witch cast her spell and got a hold of Audra's pickles somehow." Gretchen never held her tongue.

Ben chortled at his future daughter in law. She definitely made life more interesting around the Ponderosa. He couldn't wait for Hoss to get their house built on the south side of the Ponderosa and marry Gretchen.

Audra was content when Ben was winning bidder on her basket. They spent a wonderful evening getting to know one another more. She forgot that Heath was with Amy. She was enjoying her father's company.

As they made it back towards the log cabin home, Audra was enjoying her ride on the borrowed mare as she rode along side Ben and his borrowed horse. They chose to leave the surrey for the others. She and Ben had talked about life in general. Their past, the boys' past, and the futures were all mentioned. It was more pleasant than she had imagined.

However, her happiness was short lived when Audra spotted Heath and Amy. Audra felt tears fill her eyes as she saw the raven haired Amy Gannon kissing the handsome Heath Barkley. They were by the corral hidden from behind a column. Audra spotted them even in their seclusion. Ben eyes followed the direction of Audra's wide eyes. He knew there was going to be trouble when he too spotted the kissing couple.

"Audra?" Ben turned to his daughter. He could see her heart was broken.

Audra yelled into the night. "How dare him!"

Audra pulled on her horses reigns and galloped away. Ben was caught off guard. He tried to turn to follow but Audra's yell caused his horse to panic. The horse bucked widely. Before Ben could get the unfamiliar horse under control, it had bucked into a random fence pole causing it to hit it's hind leg. Ben would have to chase after Audra on a horse of his own.

By the time Ben made it to the corral, Heath was heatedly talking to Amy. Ben interrupted the angry cowboy.

"Audra took off on a borrowed mare." Ben began to saddle his own horse. "We decided to ride back on horses to end our dinner picnic."

"What?" Heath panicked. "Why would she do something so stupid? She don't know the territory."

"Well!" Ben said angrily. "She saw the man she is in love with kissing another woman."

" ##%!" Heath exclaimed. He could see Ben was angry and ready to teach Heath a lesson. " ##! That girl needs to think before actin'!"

"You should watch your language in front of a lady." Amy snipped at Heath.

"I don't see no lady!" Heath was quickly saddling Charger. "IF somethin' happens to her...!"

He didn't finish his sentence as he mounted Charger without using his stirrups. He galloped away after Audra. He needed to explain.


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N Thanks for all the supporters of this story. I appreciate the feedback. It makes me want to write more chapters. IF you didn't read chapter 34 and 35, they were posted ONLY days before this post. I've posted three chapters in one weekend.**

 ** _Chapter 36: Acting Out of Character_**

Audra had been found by Adam and Abigail as they had finished their picnic earlier due to little Ben getting tired. They had decided to head towards the house when they spotted Audra sitting on the edge of a creek bank. The girl was sobbing as she threw stones in the creek. They questioned her as they pulled the surrey up to her.

"What's the wrong, Audra?" Adam bent down to help his new sister up.

"H..hhhheeathh...kisssssssssssssed...Amy." Audra whimpered out in stuttering words.

That was all they needed to hear to understand Audra being upset. Abigail would ask her sister what happened when she got to the cabin. She didn't want to question Audra more in her current state of distress. The couple tied the mare to their surrey and had Audra travel back with them.

Heath was unaware of Audra being found. In his hurry to find Audra, he realized he had no idea what direction she had went. He hadn't questioned Ben. There were too many horse and buggy tracks to pick up a trail. It was due to the many who attended the charity rodeo.

Heath felt his ribs aching more as he tried to think of where Audra may have gone. He heard sounds of coyotes howling, which only added to his worry. Heath felt an immense fear sit over him. Audra was so much to him now. He feared she could be hurt. Heath also began to think how the relationship would cause problems for the Barkleys. He asked himself if he was being selfish wanting and loving Audra as he did.

His ears picked up the sound of moaning coming from a thicket near him. Without hesitating, Heath road straight through the thorns fearing Audra may be stuck in the thicket hurting. He didn't find Audra. Instead, he found a young teenage couple in a heated kiss. The couple thought they were caught by parents. Heath dismissed them as they scurried off into the night.

Heath felt the stinging not only in his ribs now but also from the thorns that penetrated his skin. He pulled off his blue shirt to stop the offending thorns' continuation of sticking in his skin. Heath felt his whole world was crashing around him because he couldn't find Audra. The man didn't shed much tears in his young life. Boy howdy, did he feel like crying now.

Heath wiped his arm over his face trying to think. It wasn't time to get emotional. He had to find Audra and bring her to safety. Heath's worry was soon abated when he heard Ben Cartwright's voice calling him. The man road up from the other side of the thicket.

"Audra is with Adam and Abby. They found her. She's headed back to the ranch." Ben saw the shirtless cowboy's relieved face.

He handed Heath a canteen. Heath took a long drink before dousing his head in the cool water. Heath looked up as he spoke in his soft drawl. "Never been so afraid. I reckon'." Heath was airing out his concern for Audra before he added."I didn't kiss Amy. She grabbed and kissed me."

"I thought as much when I heard how angry you were with her." Ben road along side of Heath. "You still seem a little agitated."

"I am." Heath admitted. "Audra has always been a little hot headed. She could've got herself hurt or worse tonight. She is used to ridin' out on the Barkley ranch but she knew better than this."

"Looks like you had better nights." Ben nodded to Heath's shirt full of thorns. He then noticed Heath's bruised side. "Your ribs okay?"

"Yeah. M'fine." Heath clicked Charger on. "But I plan on havin' a talkin' to with your daughter. One she ain't gonna like too well."

Ben chuckled lightly as they made their way towards the corral. Audra was being helped down by Adam when they road up. Heath dismounted Charger as he approached the others.

"I'd like to speak to Audra alone, Adam." Heath noticed Audra's angry look.

Ben nodded for Adam and Abby to follow him into the cabin. He figured things were about to get a little heated between the blondes. He thought it best to let them sort it out on their own.

Heath stood only in his jeans which were belted up with leather belt. Audra recognized the look on his face. However, she didn't care about how Heath Barkley felt at the moment. He hurt her. Audra felt Heath didn't care how deep she was falling in love with him. She demised he had pushed her feelings aside for his own pleasure.

Heath reached over to grasp her arm. He quickly tried to curb his anger before speaking.

"What the #* ! do you think you were doing, Audra!?" Heath released Audra's arm. He didn't do a very good job of defusing his anger after all. He was usually good at keeping his feelings bottled up. However, Audra was getting the best of him in emotions. Heath turned to walk away. He needed to get clear of the girl before he said something he'd regret.

Audra grabbed for him. Her hand clasped Heath's forearm. "Heath, what has become of you? You kissed her! I saw you! What are you trying to do to me?"

Heath jerked his arm from Audra. "ME! You go riding while night is fallin'. You are the one actin' a fool."

Audra stood glaring at Heath. _How dare he turn this on her? He kissed Amy!_ "You lily livered scoundrel. You have possessed my thoughts and then you turn and kiss Amy Gannon. You kissed her!" She knew she wasn't making sense. She was angry and talking irrational. Not to mention throwing insults she had read in some dime store novel about a pirate.

Heath ignored her words. The girl needed to be taught a lesson. He didn't kiss Amy but that wasn't the point right now. There was so much to think about when it came to them. Heath had mulled over a lot as he road in search of the girl he loved. Could he be a part of causing the Barkleys pain? Somehow, Audra had to understand that they couldn't act on their feelings. It would hurt too many people. Heath needed her to think him not a man worthy of her. He felt he wasn't any way. He picked her up and dropped her squirming body in the closest water trough.

"How dare you!" Audra screamed as she sputtered when she came up from the water. She climbed out of the trough tripping slightly. Heath caught her before she fell. "Let go of me!"

Heath smirked as he looked up and down Audra's body. "Your clothing seems to be soaked."

Audra was angry that Heath did not find offense at her words yet was making comments of her soaked attire. She looked down at herself. Her eyes widened at her white blouse and cream colored riding skirt.

Audra realized that Heath could see through her wet attire. _How dare him_? "I hate you!"

Heath shrugged as he continued to stare at Audra's body. He figured that would make her angry enough to not want anything romantic to do with him. "These words upset me how?"

"Codpiece!" Audra screamed at him as she tried to march past him. _Okay, maybe reading pirate novels wasn't such a good way to pass time while the men were out on the range._

Heath grabbed her by the arm stopping her. He turned her around harshly. "That does not sound like words spoken by a lady."

Audra couldn't help but to notice Heath's well defined chest glistening with the moisture from the small peppering of water splashed on him from the trough. She swallowed as she stared at how defined his muscles were and taut his stomach was. His handsome looks and taut body were NOT going to melt her this go round. She noticed the bruising on his side. Part of her wanted to take care of him but the other part still wanted to slap him.

Angrily, she stomped Heath's foot. He laughed as he pulled her to him. Her body thudded against his.

"You're actin' like a child throwin' your tantrum." Heath grinned wickedly as he licked his wet lips. "I think a child needs a lesson taught her."

Heath held her by one arm as he took off his belt with the other. Audra's eyes widened in horror at Heath's gesture.

"You wouldn't dare whip me!" Audra tried to jerk free from Heath's grasp but his hold was too strong.

"No, little girl." Heath leaned in to whisper huskily in her ear. His breath tickled her ear heatedly. "You may like that too much."

Audra tried to smack Heath's face but he was too quick for her. He spun her around hurriedly. He pushed Audra until she sat on the top of a bail of hay by the corral fence. With his leather belt, Heath tied her hands to one of the posts.

"What are you doing?" Audra kicked her feet and flailed her body trying to free herself.

Heath peered down at her. "Watchin' a child throw a tantrum. If you're gonna keep actin' like a child and puttin' yourself in trouble. Maybe I need to hogtie ya up to keep ya in place."

"Let me loose, you putrid excuse for a man! Let me loose!" Audra thrashed her body back and forth. Her wet hair flung water as she screeched at Heath.

Heath stood there with his hands on his hips. His ribs were making it difficult to stand up. But it was Audra he was concerned about. He was regretting his actions. He wasn't sure what he was thinking by tying Audra to the post. She had scared him to death with worry. He couldn't fathom losing her. Audra was everything to him.

Joe Cartwright had been told to tell Audra and Heath that supper was ready. He stepped up to the battling couple. He glanced down at Audra then back to Heath. He arched his eyebrow questioningly.

"She's a little hot headed. I thought perhaps a dunkin' could cool her down." Heath smirked then turned to Joe like Audra wasn't even there. "Did you get the supplies for the fence?"

"Are you seriously going to do ranch business and leave me tied up like this!" Audra screamed at them both. Then she tried to play on Joe's sympathy. "I'm your little sister, Joe."

Joe swallowed nervously. He figured Audra deserved whatever Heath had done to her. He wasn't sure why, but he knew Heath. However, Audra was his sister. Joe thought it best to just let the two work it out. "Supplies are getting low. I'll send Candy in to town for supplies tomorrow. Gettin' too dark to head out tonight." Joe nervously rocked on his feet. "Pa won't like it if his little girl catches a cold, Heath."

Heath shook his head due to his blonde tendrils of hair becoming soaked due to the canteen water and Audra's earlier tirade in the water trough. "Let me know when the supplies come in. I'll get right on fixin' the fence."

"Well, Pa said to tell you supper is done. We're having some grade A steak tonight." Joe frowned slightly.

"That sounds promising." Heath glanced back down to Audra. She was shivering.

"Do you think she's learned her lesson?" Joe laughed nervously as he watched the stubborn female shaking due to the cold water. He didn't want to make Heath angry. He knew Heath when he was Heath Thomson. The man could stir up a fight when he wanted to. Maybe he'd send Hoss to figure this one out. "I'll leave you to see that she has."

Heath stooped down so that he was eye level with Audra. He could see how cold the soaking was making her. Heath loosened Audra from her bondage. She stood as her knees shook and her teeth shattered. Heath didn't want her cold. He wasn't handling himself very well lately. _This girl was driving him crazy!_

"You could have died out there. Quit trying to get yourself killed." Heath pushed back a strand of wet hair from Audra's face. "You scared me, Audra. Do you understand that this was very ignorant of you?"

"I hate you." Audra said in a shaking voice.

"I think you've already said those words." Heath pulled her to him to try to warm her.

Audra at first tried to hit him to push him away. However when her body was against his, she felt his warmth. Audra pushed herself closer to him. Her teeth rattled as she buried her head into his chest.

"You disgust me." She whispered as her eyes closed feeling his warm skin against her cheek. His body caused her a warmth on the outside but also the familiar warmth flamed in her stomach. Audra hated her own heart betraying her like it was.

Heath enveloped his arms around her pulling her so close to his bare chest that they clung together with moisture. "I see that I do."

"You make me want to heave." Audra sighed out as her fingers danced gingerly on Heath's abdomen.

He was perfect in physique. Audra was not blind to that. His skin tingled beneath the slight touch of her fingers. He tried to tell himself he missed a woman's touch. Heath tried to ignore the rare beauty that this female possessed. Heath tried to tell himself what he had thought of earlier. Taking their relationship further into romance was bound to turn out bad. He tried but he failed. His eyes glanced down at the very moment that Audra glanced up.

"I didn't kiss her. Amy kissed me." Heath whispered an explanation to Audra. He needed her to understand he'd never intentionally hurt her.

There was a seductive burning that seemed to scorch their souls. Their faces were angled looking at one another. As Heath leaned down, Audra went up on her tiptoes. Their lips could feel the breath of the other.

"You hate me." Heath whispered huskily causing his breath to tease her lips.

"I could never hate you." Audra began to trace her fingers up Heath's chest slowly feeling the hard definition of his muscles. She swallowed deeply as her eyes began to flutter shut.

Their breaths mingled together as their lips came closer to seal in a kiss.

"Hmmm." A clearing of someone's throat caused Heath and Audra to stop the kiss.

 _Boy howdy. What was it with the Cartwrights interrupting a kiss with their dag gone throat clearing?_ Heath wondered.

"Hoss?" Heath backed away from Audra like he was a kid caught stealing cookies.

Audra's face flushed red. Without saying a word, Audra nodded at her new found brother and Heath before walking demurely away from them.

Hoss placed his large arm around Heath's shoulder. "Joe informed me you had tied our sister to a pole out here." Hoss watched Heath's face pale. "Now, little buddy, I can't have you doin' that to my only sister. Now can I?"

"No." Heath grinned with an innocent lop sided grin. "Boy howdy. She made me mad."

"Yep. I figure." Hoss kept his arm tightly around Heath's shoulder as he steered Heath towards the house.

"She makes me do things I don't usually do." Heath stated in his low drawl.

"Yep. I figure." Hoss continued his tight grip on Heath.

"I'm not actin' like myself because of her. She makes me so dad blame mad." Heath tried to explain.

"Yep. I figure." Hoss pulled Heath along as they walked.

"I won't do it again, Hoss." Heath felt ashamed of how he had treated Audra. Not to mention, the big man's arm was squeezing tighter as they walked.

"Yep. I figure." Hoss rustled Heath's wet hair before letting him go.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37:New Territory**

Amy Gannon was ignored by everyone including her sister. It was too embarrassing for Audra and Heath to bring up the events of a few days ago. Therefore, it was ignored until the time was less raw with emotion. However, Ben Cartwright found himself with other problems that seemed over his head.

Ben Cartwright had no idea how to act with a daughter nor how to act with Tom Barkley's illegitimate son. With Audra, the father found having a daughter was much more difficult for him than having sons. With Heath, Ben was worried he'd do something to offend the young man. Ben definitely didn't know how to proceed with them as a couple.

After insisting Heath see a doctor about his ribs, Ben found keeping his nineteen year old daughter from Heath's room was proving almost a test of wills. Back at the Barkley Ranch, Ben surmised that Audra was used to helping Heath out when he was hurt. That included sitting in his room to keep watch over him. According to Dr. Angler, the town doctor, Heath had been hurt often. That fact still didn't help the uneasy feeling Ben got when Audra insisted on helping Heath with his cracked ribs.

The stubborn boy was more hurt than he let on. Dr. Angler said Heath shouldn't be on a horse for a least a couple of weeks so his ribs wouldn't break from the fracture and puncture a lung. Heath was a difficult patient but that was not what was causing Ben's unrest. It was the fact he had caught the two blondes in a very heated kiss days earlier. The kiss was a little too intense for an unmarried couple. At least that is what Ben felt. He wondered if it was because Audra was a daughter and not a son. Ben felt an overwhelming need to protect her from the opposite sex.

The only relief Ben got was after he received a reply from Victoria Barkley about his telegraph. Ben had sent Victoria a telegraph stating Heath had injured his ribs in the accident. It didn't take long before Victoria sent a message back saying she and her sons were catching the next train to Carson City. Ben could tell by the immediate reply that Victoria was waiting for a reason to come to Nevada. Now she had that reason. Maybe Victoria's presence would stop the couple from being alone together. Or would it get worse as Victoria thought of them as brother and sister? Ben was suddenly developing a headache.

Ben made his way up stairs to the guest room he had insisted Heath stay in while his ribs healed. Ben wished he had kept the boy in the bunkhouse. Worrying about Audra and Heath being alone was something he wasn't used to. He had told his sons to treat a lady with respect. Ben had hoped they followed his upbringing. However, he never really deterred his sons from dating nor did he check up on them to make sure they followed his teachings. Heath was very respectful with Audra. Ben had the wisdom to realize that didn't stop feelings from being heated. With Audra, it felt very different than with his sons. He realized he didn't want any man around her but especially a man, who had his little girl all flustered by just a crooked grin.

The thing was that Heath knew his charm with the ladies. Ben could tell. What many saw as shyness was really quiet wisdom. Heath only spoke when he had something to say. He wasn't one for idle chatter among the men. Heath seemed different with Audra. It seemed Heath loved to hear her prattle on about anything. When Heath spoke to Audra, it was with interest and respect. Ben appreciated the boy's manners and character. That appreciation stopped when he caught little things that Heath did around Audra to keep her heart fluttering and the girl off kilter.

Ben supposed he was watching too closely. This was his girl though; so wasn't that what fathers were supposed to do? Watching closely allowed Ben to see the subtle way Heath kept Audra infatuated with the boy. It was nothing for Heath to run his hand gently over Audra's neck every so slightly or push a tendril of hair behind Audra's ear. Ben had even noticed Heath lick his lips causing Audra to break out in a red hue. The one move Ben hated the most was when Heath would take his hand along her back to move to the front. He noticed Heath's hand would travel up Audra ever so slightly but stopped right before Ben was ready to break the boy's fingers. Ben caught his daughter gasping each time Heath pulled his little stunt. It infuriated Ben but he noticed Heath only did it when he thought he wouldn't get caught. Those times included helping Audra down from her horse or a buggy as well as pulling out her chair to help her sit. Ben knew if he blew up like he wanted to do with Heath, the whole family would think he was crazy. Yes, the boy was that good at being subtle.

Ben's thoughts were interrupted when he was almost at Heath's temporary bedroom. Ben stopped dead in his tracks at seeing Audra standing between Heath's legs while he sat on the dresser.

Obviously, Audra was helping Heath shave. That would be fine if she wasn't so close to the boy while she did.

Audra's hand shook slightly as she stepped even closer to Heath.

"Don't shake. Unless you plan to cut my throat." Heath placed his hand over hers trying to calm her.

"I'll need to be closer." Audra breathed in causing her chest to rise and fall.

The buttons of her shirt had managed to open slightly during her getting the supplies to shave Heath. She hadn't noticed the opening. However, Heath did. He opened his legs and pulled her between his taut thighs. Audra drew in her bottom lip slightly. She then scraped the sharp razor over Heath's face. His tanned skin came into view as the blade slid down his face. Audra leaned back to rinse the blade in the dry sink. Heath's eyes went immediately to her cleavage that was showing as she leaned down to rinse the razor's blade.

He fought his own urges to touch her silky skin. She was so delicate and vulnerable. It made Heath want to hold her and cradle her against his body. He knew his thoughts were of making love to her. Heath closed his eyes. He didn't make love to a lady if you weren't married. It wasn't how it was supposed to be. He only pleasured himself on prostitutes. Even that had been before falling in love with Audra.

Audra watched as the blade raked across Heath's strong jaw. Slowly, his manly features were being drawn out as his beard disappeared. His thick lips moistened by his tongue caused her to want to touch them. She took the pad of her thumb across his lips softly. Heath's eyes looked at her quizzical.

"Lather was on your lip." Audra made an excuse. A lie. She couldn't resist touching his lips.

Taking a chance of crossing boundaries, Heath placed his hands on her waist. Then he pushed down his hands to Audra's hips. He then slipped his hands to her back. He pulled her closer very slowly. His hands caressed her back. Audra's breath hitched in her lungs at his actions. However, she didn't try to move or fight his advances. The more the razor took off his beard. The more she wanted to touch his gorgeous face.

"You 're breathin' heavy." Heath spoke with a voice laced with a husky lust. "Do ya like bein' near me, Audra?"

"I am nervous that it tempts me." Audra answered in a whisper. Was he tempting her or was she tempting him?

"Me too." Heath slid his hands back to Audra's waist.

"Hold still." Audra stepped in closer to Heath's open thighs. Her body was pressed against his body now. "I don't want to cut you."

"I can shave myself, Audra." Heath's hands continued to grip Audra around her waist. He pulled her closer even though it was almost impossible. "But I reckon I like this better."

"Are you teasing me, Heath Barkley?" Audra felt Heath's fingers brush along her bare skin at her waist. Somehow, Heath had managed to pull her shirt free from her riding skirt without Audra realizing it. That was until his calloused fingers played on her skin.

"I ain't teasin', Audra Cartwright." Heath flicked his tongue against his lower lip as he reached one hand up to grasp around Audra's neck. He pulled her face down to his face. "I'm rather serious."

At first, it pleased Ben to hear his daughter being called Cartwright by Heath. That was short lived when Heath pulled Audra into one of those heated kisses that caused his daughter's knees to go weak. Ben couldn't believe the audacity of the young man kissing his daughter in his house! Ben came out of his shock when he heard the clanking of the razor against the wood of the dresser. Audra had dropped it as she entangled her fingers in Heath's hair.

When Ben heard his daughter moaning due to Heath Barkley's over zealous kissing, Ben saw red. Ben clinched his fists until his knuckles turned white. He thought his head was going to explode in a billow of smoke. He was that angry at the young cowboy because he was kissing his beautiful, innocent daughter. He could beat the boy into a bloody pulp. This was new territory for him. It still made the older man feel a protective need to stop Heath Barkley from kissing Audra Cartwright.

As Ben took a step towards the offending cowboy, he stopped again at Heath's words as the cowboy pulled away from the kiss.

"Audra, ummmm. This is new territory for me." Heath swallowed as he looked into Audra's eyes. "I know this is definitely new territory for you."

Audra bit her lip nervously not knowing what Heath was talking about. "You've been with women, Heath. I'm not that naive."

"Yeah. I have." Heath slid his hand over Audra's cheek. "What I mean by new territory is that I ain't never wanted a lady like I do ya. I've had women but not a lady. Do you understand?"

"Yes." Audra squeaked out as she fluttered her eyelashes.

"So I think maybe you shouldn't be in a bedroom alone with me." Heath hoped she understood. It wasn't that he didn't want her there. Therefore he said what he was feeling. "It's not that I don't want ya here, Audra. Boy howdy, I do want ya here. But I don't think it is proper now. NOT with the way I'm feelin' towards ya and you're feelin' towards me. Do ya understand?"

Audra nodded her head as she sniffled. Tears started to flow down her cheeks. Heath took both of his hands to cup her cheeks. His thumbs wiped away the flow of tears.

"Don't cry, Darlin'. I really want ya. The fact is that I want ya too much. Ya might be in control of your own feelings but I'm not sure I can be." Heath teased with a wink. " I just don't want another Barkley bastard runnin' around. One is enough for the family."

Audra giggled as she stepped away from Heath. "I guess you better shave on your own."

It was that moment that Ben respected the boy even more. Ben breathed out a sigh of relief before playing innocent on his approach. "There you are, Audra. I see you're taking care of the patient."

"Hello." Audra wiped her face quickly hoping her face was dry from the tears. "I was trying to shave him. Heath informed me that he can shave himself. Was you needing me for something?"

"I wanted to inform you both. Victoria and your brothers are coming to Carson City." Ben grinned widely when he saw both Heath and Audra pale at the news.

Ben Cartwright may have been in new territory of having a daughter. However, he already figured out how to throw cold water on the couple. It was as easy as mentioning Victoria Barkley's name.


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38: Game Over**

The day Victoria Barkley arrived with her three sons in tow was a relief to Ben Cartwright. His worries of how to handle the romance between Audra and Heath were halted. The budding couple didn't act very much like a couple the moment Victoria Barkley stepped from the surrey and her feet touched Nevada ground.

Ben almost sighed out loud when he watched the way Heath Barkley greeted Victoria Barkley with the utmost respect of a son. Ben knew immediately the romance would die down as Audra and Heath tried to figure out a way to tell the Barkley family of their new relationship. It was going to be difficult for the two. However, Ben knew he needed Victoria to show him an example of how to raise a proper young lady.

Worry for Amy Gannon was another story. She realized her biggest mistake was underestimating Heath's feelings for Audra and overestimating her own enticement to men. Heath Barkley wasn't interested in the raven haired girl no matter how beautiful she was. His eyes were only on the blonde that the newly arrived Barkleys referred to as a sister.

Even Amy realized to remain tight lipped when it came to Audra's and Heath's romantic interest in one another. The Barkleys were rather fond of the two but not as a couple but as siblings. Heath was no longer touching Audra in any way but a brotherly manner. Audra was no longer flirting openly with Heath. Instead, the blondes were trying to avoid touching all together or even being close in proximity to one another.

The arrival of the Barkleys had all the Cartwrights on their toes about protecting Heath's and Audra's secret. Amy recalled the previous night's conversation with Audra.

It was the confrontation in the barn that set Amy to thinking of her play for Heath nights previously. Audra was currying Heath's horse, Charger, when Amy entered the barn. The barn was dimly lit when Amy first arrived. The Barkleys had not yet arrived to the Ponderosa when the confrontation took place. Heath was getting ready to head in to town to make sure the Barkleys made it safely on the train. Amy watched curiously the interaction of Heath and Audra.

Heath pulled Audra around to face him. Audra's arms went immediately around Heath's neck as she allowed the curry brush to hang limply from her hands.

"Are you wanting something, cowboy?" Audra teased with a flirtatious lilt in her voice.

"Mmmmhmmm, I sure do, pretty lady." Heath nuzzled Audra's neck. "Reckon' after today I won't get to steal kisses when I want to. I'm gonna miss being like this with you, Audra."

"I know." Audra leaned until her head rested against Heath's chest. "I wanted time with you so we could work it out."

"We worked it out in our hearts." Heath raked his hand over Audra's hair. "Don't mean they will accept it. I don't want to hurt them."

"Do you want to hurt me?" Audra looked up until their eyes met.

"Never." Heath ran his finger over Audra's cheek. "We'll figure it out. It may take some time but we will."

"I guess you better go to town and spend the night. You don't want to miss their early morning train." Audra released Heath before turning back to Charger.

Heath spun her around to face him once more. His mouth met hers as he pushed her against the wall of the stall. Amy couldn't believe how intense the kiss was. She felt faint just watching the way Heath kissed Audra. It was so much more than any kiss she had experienced. Her kissing Heath was a far cry from how Heath kissed Audra.

Audra blushed slightly when Heath released her. She had to inhale air to not feel like falling over. Heath winked as he let his grip on Audra go.

In his low drawl, Heath stepped away from Audra. "Don't want you to forget my kisses while the family is here."

With those words, Heath sauntered away confidently. The man sure knew how to keep a woman wanting him.

"He loves me, Amy." Audra never looked from the horse as she continued to brush the horse's long mane. "I know you think you can win him but this isn't a game. I love him."

Amy walked up to stare at Audra. "Has he said that to you? That he loves you?"

"No." Audra admitted as she looked over to the raven haired girl. "But I know Heath. Becoming friends first let me see a side he'd rarely show in front of the girls he pursues."

Amy chuckled despite the air of awkwardness . "I imagine Heath doesn't have to pursue long to catch the girl."

Audra tilted her head sideways thinking of the women Heath had been involved with since coming to the Barkley ranch. Each one he was after, Heath succeeded in wooing. Even if later those girls left due to circumstances of his birth. It was family that caused the girl to not be with Heath not Heath himself.

"He is rather charming when he wants to be." Audra put the currying brush up before sitting on a bail of hay. "Amy, I need you to understand that the Barkleys mean so much to me and to Heath. Heath had to prove himself over and over because of not being born to Mother. It wasn't something planned by the family but it seemed to happen any way. I was born to the right even if I'm a Cartwright. Heath wasn't. They can't know of Heath and I until we are ready to let them know. Not for me but please for Heath, don't speak of us."

Amy shook her head in understanding. "I'm not out to hurt your family. I tried to capture him. I'm the one that kissed Heath. He gave me a real angry talking to after."

"He told me." Audra could see how embarrassed Amy was. Before standing to leave, she added. "Let's just let it go. I'm nervous enough about my family coming. I really don't want to think about you making a play for Heath."

Amy held up her hand defensively in a surrendering pose. "I know when I'm beat."

"Like I said, it was never a game, Amy." Audra looked back over her shoulder at the girl.

Amy Gannon hated losing. However, she knew that Heath Barkley would never look at her the way she wanted him to. As a matter of fact, Amy wasn't wanting to have the blonde cowboy fall in love with her. She only wanted to have an adventure with wild cowboy. Heath was the most handsome man she had ever laid eye son. Amy was desiring to spend some time with him for fun alone. There was no plan in falling in love with Heath especially after hearing he was born to an unwed mother. If Audra was in love with the man, the game was over for Amy. Her intentions weren't as malicious as they seemed. Her intentions were merely to have experiences of kissing and dating the gorgeous cowboy. After all, it would make a great story to tell her friends back East of the handsome cowboy who she wooed and won.

Meeting one Barkley inparticular taught the girl quickly on not to play games with a person's heart. Amy had never had her heart broken. She was soon to find out how having your heart stomped on was no game.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39: Broken Hearts  
**

Amy's mouth went dry from the moment she was introduced to the Barkley brother. She had never quite experienced the sudden quickening of her heart before in her entire twenty one years of living. Amy Gannon had met many males. She had wooed and enticed more names than she could remember from the age of sixteen on up. She was still very much a lady but a lady with a gift of having men fall to her whims.

Heath Barkley was the exception. Soon she would find out that another Barkley would show her interest yet not fall spell to her feminine prowess. Instead, Amy would find she was head over heels in love with the handsome male.

When he was introduced to her, she found herself taken aback from the unfamiliar feelings. The Barkley men noticed her immediately. It was obvious that she was beautiful. Amy was actually breathtakingly beautiful.

The first Barkley brother she met was Nick Barkley. She found him almost as equally handsome as Heath Barkley. Amy supposed some women preferred the tall, dark cowboy to the angelically handsome blonde. However, that wasn't her preference. It didn't seem to matter as Nick Barkley ignored her due to his plans were plain. He was going to spend the time at the Cartwrights checking out the Ponderosa and spending time with the younger brother he missed so much. Besides, Amy's heart didn't even flutter at the man.

It was when the other Barkley was introduced that she found strangely compelled towards him. To most even her, he wasn't even considered as handsome as the two cowboys. However, the man had a sophistication and knowledge about him which Amy found intriguing. Heath Barkley was soon forgotten while his brother became Amy's sole focus.

It wasn't long until the two went on picnics together as well as lunches in Carson City. Their rides across the Ponderosa consisted of his talks of knowledge that astounded her. She was impressed more with his intellect than his outer person. This was new to the young lady. Amy Gannon knew she had met the man whom she wanted to spend an eternity with.

Amy sat in his arms as they picnicked under a large tree on the south side of the Ponderosa. It had been a week with him. She had wanted to speak of her love for the gentlmen and didn't care that it was only a week. She wanted this man with her whole being.

"I've never felt this way before, Darling." Amy moved in closer to his embrace. "I've never been happier."

The gentleman's face paled. Heath had sternly warned him about the girl. However, he was a man and knew how to handle women. Her declaration came as a complete surprise to him.

"Amy, I don't know what you think this is. I'm going overseas soon to study for at least a year." Eugene pulled from Amy's arms. He stood up and began to pace much like he had seen his older brother, Nick, do.

"I don't mind traveling, Eugene." Amy's face burned a crimson color as she thought of what he was saying. "I love you."

Eugene glared at her with a shocked countenance. "What? We don't even know each other that well. This was just for fun, Amy. I thought you knew that."

"You think it is a game?" Amy's voice came out in a low whisper. Then she jumped up from where she was sitting. "Did Heath or Audra put you up to this!? Is this payback for kissing Heath?"

"What? You kissed Heath?" Eugene rubbed his neck in confusion. "I don't know what you're talking about. I thought this was innocent fun."

"Like I said A GAME!" Amy screamed out as she stood in Eugene's face. "I told Audra that Heath didn't want to kiss me. Wasn't that enough to make her happy that Heath only has eyes for her? Must she drive the point home by having me fall in love to be hurt as she was!?"

"I don't understand your ranting." Eugene grabbed the girl by her shoulders. "Heath and Audra are brother and sister. Why would she care for you kissing Heath?"

Amy jerked her shoulders from Eugene's grasp. "Don't toy with me. You broke my heart. Tell Audra it worked. I understand. The difference is that she has Heath. She has his embraces, his kisses, his dedication. She proved her point!"

"They're brother and sister." Eugene repeated in a low voice. _Was this girl mad?_

"I don't know how it works in the West but I'm sure brother and sister do NOT kiss as heatedly as those two do." Amy wiped the tears from her face hurriedly. She gulped as sobs wracked her body. "I have been taught a lesson by you all. I'll never play with a man's heart again. But must you have been the one to teach me? Wasn't Heath telling me he only wanted Audra to be his enough?"

Amy turned and ran from Eugene. Eugene stood dumbfounded. Surely, the girl was mistaken. Heath wouldn't take advantage of their sister. No HIS sister not Heath's. Eugene clinched his fists together as he decided he'd confront Heath with Amy's accusations.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~B~~~~~~~~~~~~

Audra quietly came up behind Heath. She wrapped her arms around his waist.

"I miss you." She whispered to his back as she leaned against Heath. She felt his muscles beneath her cheek. She sighed as she enjoyed the simple embrace.

Heath turned around to look at her. He winked as Audra stepped back. "Might be dangerous doin' that."

"Eugene is on a picnic with Amy. Jarod went with Adam to town. Nick is with the others on the ranch. He wanted to check out the horses you broke. He may buy one of the mares." Audra sat down on a bale of hay. "Mother is with Ben. They are discussing the past again."

Heath continued brushing Charger as he waited for Audra to complain. He loved teasing her.

"You pay more attention to that horse than me." Audra propped her leg up on the hay bale. She flicked at some straws of hay as she whined out. "I want your attention, Heath."

Heath turned to face her. At least the girl didn't beat around the bush. "Do ya now?"

He tossed the brush into a bucket near him. He slowly walked towards Audra. Audra licked her lips as she gave him a flirtatious grin. "Yes. I sure do, Cowboy." Audra crooked her finger and gestured for Heath to come hither.

Heath pushed Audra back on the bale of hay with his body. His upper body was prone with her upper body as he pushed back Audra's hair from her face. "I miss you too."

Heath's lips met Audra's in a heated kiss. His lower body rested between her thighs as the couple got lost in their heated kissing. It had been a week since the Barkleys arrived thus a week since the couple had allowed themselves any touching at all. Their hunger for one another was tangible in the kiss.

"What the * ^^!" Came a cry from the door of the barn. "You son of a ^^$$% !"

Eugene was about to charge towards Heath with fists flying. However, his anger was soon replaced by worry when the three heard a wounded cry at the same moment of Eugene's shocked cursing.

"MOTHER!" Audra jumped up as Heath did the same. They both made their way to Victoria.

Victoria tried to speak but her words slurred and her face twisted before her body went limp as she succumbed to darkness.


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40: Family First**

The Cartwrights and the Barkleys gathered around Ben's fireplace waiting for the doctor to come down from checking Victoria. Audra was clinging to Ben crying as Heath looked down at his boots. He glanced up once in awhile to glimpse at Audra. He wanted to be her comforter as he had been since arriving at the Barkley ranch. Only now, he knew that he was the cause of Victoria Barkley's sudden fainting spell. Heath guessed Audra was feeling about as much guilt as he was.

Eugene was thinking of the events only an hour earlier. He knew medicine as that was his field of study. He knew that his mother had a stroke by all the signs. He was worried about Apoplexy* or death taking place **.** The family would be at a loss without the matriarch they loved so dearly. Heath was to blame and Eugene wouldn't let that slide no matter the circumstances.

He tried to keep from looking at his sister and his brother. He didn't want to cause any more problems for the family. Eugene was surprised Heath's actions with his sister had caused his usually strong mother to have such a severe physical reaction. Eugene kept his questions to himself. What was Heath thinking? How could he betray the whole family so selfishly? Eugene realized that Audra and Heath weren't related by blood. However, Audra was Eugene's sister no matter if they shared a parent. What would possess the usual level headed cowboy to pursue a relationship with the vulnerable nineteen year old sister?

Eugene peered at Heath momentarily. He noticed Heath fiddling with his shirt buttons. Eugene hadn't been around Heath that much but he knew Heath was always fiddling with something. Where Nick was boisterous and ever moving, Heath was quiet but also forever moving in his own way.

Eugene wanted to yell at the man. He wanted to tell Heath to leave and never come back. However, part of him needed to keep Heath as a brother. Eugene admitted he loved the man. Heath was a brother and a good one. He had always treated Eugene with the utmost respect as a man more than a boy. It was not like with his other brothers, who acted as if Eugene wasn't a man but a boy. Nick and Jarod tried. That was a fact. But being a father figure to the boy had been ingrained in them. Heath wasn't like that. He was only three years older than Eugene. Therefore, it was a close relationship when Eugene wasn't feeling the nag of jealousy over Nick's relationship with the blonde brother.

Eugene held in a deep intake of air as he fought between wanting to beat Heath with his fists and talk to his brother about what was going on. Eugene's thoughts were befuddled due to Heath's reaction to Victoria's fainting. Before Eugene could react, Heath had swept up the petite silver haired woman in his strong arms. Heath ran her into the house then was mounting a horse to get the doctor before anyone could react. Eugene figured Heath's quick reaction saved their mother's life if she were to come out of this.

Eugene also thought of how frightened and concerned Heath looked. Heath acted like it was his own mother in the dire situation. Eugene had to admit. Heath and Victoria had a very close relationship. They loved one another deeply as mother and son. No one could tell Heath or Victoria that it was any different than the relationship with her other children.

Still, why had Heath acted so selfishly with Audra knowing nothing good could come out of the situation? Eugene realized that answer would have to wait. Now it was time to concentrate on their mother.

Nick was pacing as usual. He would bellow out often. "What happened? Can someone tell me what happened?"

He never received an answer as all of the people in the room would look at him without a word. They knew he needed to rant so they let him.

Finally, the doctor approached. Ben noticed right away that the Barkleys swarmed the doctor all but Heath. He kept his distance but only enough to not be included in the group. Ben thought of the week since the Barkleys arrived. Heath had always seemed to be on the outside looking in when it came to the family. Not that Heath wasn't loved or tried to be ignored. It seemed that was the dynamic with the family that was accepted without question. Due to that, Ben could see how easily it was for Heath and Audra to have a different relationship than kinship. Heath kept himself just enough at bay to be a part of the family but not ingrained in their inner circle.

Ben wondered if any of the Barkleys noticed the young blonde man always on the outside keeping a distance. Ben allowed his thoughts to halt so he could concentrate on the doctor's words.

"Your mother had what is called a mini stroke. There is no apoplexy. That is a great thing. Her left arm is a little weak but her face is back to normal. No one will know it even happened in a few weeks. But don't get me wrong, she will always feel a little weaker now. She needs to keep herself fit as she has been doing." The doctor scratched his chin. "She's very healthy for her age. I've seen much younger women less healthy."

"If she is so healthy, what happened?" Nick growled angrily. What the doctor was saying didn't make much sense to him.

"I've spoke to your mother. Her speech is no longer slurred." The doctor glanced at Heath, Audra, and Eugene. He knew the three had witnessed Victoria's slurred words. "As far as your question, Mr. Barkley…"

"Nick." Nick rubbed his neck as he glanced at the doctor. "Call me Nick."

"Nick, stress can bring on many health issues. Your mother has been under extreme stress lately due to circumstances she wished not to share. However, she admitted she had been worrying for a number of weeks of things. She admitted not to sleeping due to that worry. As far as the event that caused the sudden stroke or what would be the catalyst for it, she can't even remember what she was doing at all before breakfast. All she remembers is getting up in the morning. I doubt she will regain those lost hours. It can happen but it most likely won't. When a person has a stroke, oxygen is cut off to the brain momentarily. It can be very damaging. You're mother was blessed to not lose more time or be paralyzed." The doctor stared at each family member and stressed. "It is imperative to let her regain her strength without stressing her out. IF she adds to stress, this could happen again. IF it does, she could come out far worse."

Jarrod spoke up as he shook the doctor's hand. "We will all make sure that Mother is taken care of. Is there anything else?"

"No. Let her relax with the least amount of worry possible." The doctor shook all hands including Ben's. "She wants to go home as soon as possible. I understand one of you study medicine."

"I do." Eugene spoke up.

"Well, I'd recommend more rest here but she seems adamant about going back to California. I think she needs to head home tomorrow. If you are with her, I don't see how it would hurt for her to head home. I know she will be watched for any signs of a problem with you around. It would be good for the woman to relax in her own home. Right now, she needs to be happy and feel in control. She can't do that in a strange place." The doctor looked at Ben. "I know how you Cartwrights are being hospitable. But you know how it is to want to be home."

Ben nodded in agreement. "We'll make sure she is comfortable for the night. We will keep her in bed until the family leaves out in the morning."

"After I see mother, I'll go get our tickets and make sure the Barkley rail car is ready." Nick needed to do something. He wasn't sure what happened to his mother. He never saw her looking so confused and weak. He needed to get away from the place and be alone for awhile.

Victoria glanced at the worried faces of her children. "I'm fine. I really feel fine. I want to go home with all of you."

Heath stood in the doorway. Once again, he was at a distance from the family. He felt like an intruder due to knowing the reason for Victoria's sudden ailment. He knew that the fine lady had been stressed leading to her stroke. He also knew Victoria seeing the kissing between Audra and himself was the last straw for her. Even if Victoria didn't remember what happened between, Heath did. Now he didn't know where things would go. Heath soon received what he thought was his answer.

Audra took her mother's hand in hers. "Of course, Mother. We'll head home tomorrow. Nick is going to get our tickets and make sure our private railcar is ready. You and I are going to spend quality time together. Family comes first."


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41: A Journey into Heartache**

Victoria Barkley didn't know why she had a nagging feeling that something was wrong. Something that had to do with more than her health. Dr. Merar had agreed with the doctor from Carson City. Victoria needed to be relaxed and not stressed out. Therefore, whatever the feeling was deep inside her thoughts, she decided to try to dissuade herself from thinking about it.

That didn't stop her from following her hunches about needing to send Heath away for awhile. Perhaps, Audra needed to quit clinging to the blonde brother and start counting on the rest of the family. At least that was all Victoria could surmise from her sudden need to have Heath leave the ranch for an extended amount of time. She'd not say it in quite such hurtful words. Victoria Barkley would never hurt the son she held dear in her heart intentionally. However, the need in her to send Heath away was overwhelming. She would have to think of something that would make perfect sense as well as not hurt the boy, who she had come to cherish.

The Barkley family was back in their normal routine of life with the exception of doting on the mother they all loved so dearly. Even Heath and Audra had come to a stand still with their feelings. Eugene had made his thoughts perfectly clear to Heath the night of Victoria's stroke.

Heath, who had enough guilt building in him, remembered Eugene's words very clearly from the weeks prior.

 _"What the # %% do you think you were doing, Heath?" Eugene grabbed Heath's shoulder to spin him around to face him._

 _"Leave it be, Eugene." Heath warned as he jerked his shoulder free. "I'm not hashing this out with you."_

 _"You are." Eugene crossed his arms over his chest defiantly. "Or should I get Pappy or Nick?" Eugene saw Heath's eyes darken at Nick's name being mentioned. "Oh yes, Nick will do. He can see you fall from that pedestal he puts you on. I warned him that this would happen. But he wouldn't listen. After all, you two have some sort of connection since he allowed the bastard to be a part of the family. You don't deserve to call my mother, Victoria Barkley, mother."_

 _Eugene didn't even know why those words slipped out. He didn't think of Heath as such. Anger had loosened his tongue to say the imaginable. Before he could apologize, Heath had him by the collar and backed up against the wood slats on the Cartwright's porch._

 _Heath sneered as he said between gritted teeth. "You listen real close, Gene!" Heath's words, mixed with the cold stare Eugene was receiving, caused Eugene to have sudden fear of his half brother. This was a side of Heath he had never saw. He hoped to never see again._

 _"I love your mother like I did my own. I never was out to hurt any of you. So don't be using those words with me. I've put up with a lot from you all to prove myself. I know that lately, I've failed to be the man or Barkley I should be. I let my own desires take over and I was selfish. But I won't take no back talk from my own little brother and I won't be called no bastard from him or anyone else in this family." Heath's grip tightened on Eugene's collar. "Most of all, I'll not be reminded of how much I know I don't deserve to call Victoria Barkley my mother. I've been aware of that since riding on the Barkley land a year ago. Now you listen straight, boy. I can wipe this porch with you if I was aimin' to. So don't go threatening something you can't back up. I've squashed bigger pee ants than you!"_

 _Heath only let go of the pale frightened Eugene when Ben Cartwright touched his back. "Son, let the man go. He got your message. Your mother doesn't need this right now. Okay?"_

 _Heath pushed Eugene harshly as he released him. He turned to Ben. "I'm sorry, Mr. Cartwright. I reckon things are tense right now."_

 _"Do you want to talk about it?" Ben glanced between both men then turned his attention back to Heath._

 _To Eugene's surprise, Heath told exactly what was going on. "Eugene caught me kissing Audra. I think Mother did too. I, also, think that may be what caused her stroke. I'm sure she saw us."_

 _Ben sighed out as he grasped Heath's forearm. "I knew it would be difficult for Victoria once I saw how much she thinks of you as her own son." Ben looked at Eugene when he stressed those words. "Talk to her once she heals, Heath. Remind her that you're not Audra's brother by blood. Remind her you were never raised as such either. I know how much you and Audra mean to each other. If things can't be worked out, you know you have a home on this ranch. Not as a hand either, you'll be a foreman. You're too valuable to be anything less. And if you and Audra decide to go on despite anyone's wishes, you'll be welcome as a son in law."_

 _Out of the corner of Ben's eye, he saw Eugene's mouth drop open. He didn't care what the young Barkley thought. Heath was a good man. The decision to pursue Audra may have been a wrong decision but it was too late now. He knew his daughter's heart was too wrapped up in Heath to look back._

 _Ben left leaving the boys alone. He knew there would be no more fighting between them. Eugene scuffed his boot on the porch fearing the wrath of Heath but needing to protect his mother more._

 _"What are you going to do about Audra?" Eugene asked trying to show as much bravado as possible._

 _"That's between Audra and me." Heath stated before sauntering off towards the stables_.

That was almost two weeks ago. After arriving back on Barkley land, Heath and Audra spoke about the best thing to do. Audra didn't agree with Heath on ending the relationship. She cried after Heath's words to her.

 _"I can't be selfish, Audra." Heath tried to reason with the irate girl. "We have to be brother and sister in her eyes. I know that. I can't hurt her or this family."_

 _"What about me, Heath?" Audra snapped at him. "What about hurting me?"_

 _"I never wanted to hurt you either." Heath tried to explain. "But you are so young and perfect. I know some man will sweep you off your feet in time. Or more like, you'll sweep him off his feet. You'll heal from this. Mother may not if we keep pursuing what we both know we can't have. Look how Eugene acted. Can you imagine Nick's or worse Jarrod's reactions to us? He's your Pappy. He won't want this and you and I know it."_

 _"How am I supposed to just quit lov…." Audra paused. She refused to tell Heath she loved him with him telling her it was over. She would reason with him but not beg. "...feeling like I do." Audra whipped back her hair trying to fight the threatening onslaught of tears._

 _"Mother mentioned going to Mexico to look over some of the mines there. There are some new pumps being installed. As she said, I'm the best one for the job." Heath explained as he watched the woman he loved. "I'll be gone awhile. You go back to your dances and parties. Get over me and be young and carefree, Audra. You deserve to be happy."_

 _"I heard Nick and Jarrod talking about the beautiful Teresa. Perhaps, you want to forget me with her!" Audra slapped Heath's face due to the hurt and anger she was feeling. She then ran from him to her bedroom. She locked herself away from the rest of the family for the night. No one questioned her as she seemed to be emotional since leaving the Ponderosa._

 _Heath stared after her. He fought not to go to her. Instead, he continued to load his saddlebags for the long trip. He said to himself. "No one can replace you in my heart, Audra. But maybe I can be replaced in yours while I'm gone. I just want you all happy."_

Heath would be gone for three months in Mexico. Time would not heal the wounded hearts although it would heal the physical part of Victoria Barkley's body. Audra and Heath would soon learn that their love was too strong for three months to halt it. They would also learn the fear of never returning to each other due to Heath's being captured and imprisoned for aiding General Ruiz. This event would prove to be a cement in taking their relationship beyond what both could see happening.


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42: Desperate**

Audra Barkley no longer thought of herself as a Barkley. Oh, she didn't deny she loved being the daughter of Victoria and Thomas Barkley. However, she loved being Heath Barkley's love interest more. Truth be told, she had a great fondness for Ben Cartwright and his sons as well. Audra and the Cartwrights made sure to keep in correspondence. The letters shared between them cemented the fact that she felt like family to the Cartwrights, as she was. Audra couldn't deny she would always love the Barkleys as her own family as well. Thomas and Victoria Barkley would always be her parents above anyone else and Jarrod, Nick, and Eugene would forever be her brothers. However, she longed to be a Cartwright for one main reason. That reason was Heath Morgan Barkley.

The months that passed only caused Audra to miss and long for Heath even more. When General Ruiz and his son showed up at the ranch, Audra's fear for Heath caught her by surprise. Heath wasn't in any danger that anyone knew about. However, Audra felt differently as fear clung to her like a cape enveloping a person.

Her fears weren't as irrational as she had hoped. It was when Senor Martinez of the Mexican Council showed up to tell of Heath's capture that Audra realized this. Her family didn't seem to be doing enough to help Heath. Her mother spoke to them all about how Heath would receive the death sentence. _Didn't they know what he may be enduring? Hadn't the family listened when Ruiz told of the evil of Captain Chevez? Didn't they think of him being imprisoned after his stay in Carterson? Why didn't they send Ruiz back and get Heath home? What if Heath was killed in Ruiz's place?_

Audra felt guilty for even thinking the idea of sending the innocent man back to Mexico. A place where he would surely be killed. That wasn't what a Barkley did. A Barkley stood for justice even at the expense of their own.

 _Blast the Barkleys!_ Audra felt guilt. More so, Audra felt desperate.

That desperation caused her actions to go against the grain of the Barkley teachings. She purposely allowed Ruiz to be in the house when Martinez showed up again. She knew that Martinez would tell of Heath's capture to Ruiz. The United States Marshall, Mr. Ross had already said that Ruiz would be hunted. Victoria said he would be killed for a crime that Ruiz didn't commit. _What about Heath going to be killed_? Victoria thought they could save them both. But what if she was wrong? Audra was desperate to save Heath no matter what it took.

When Audra seen the man representing Mexican Council approaching, she made sure that she called General Ruiz in for some reason or another. She couldn't even remember. However, as she hoped, Ruiz took the bait and left for Mexico along with Pepe, Nick and Jarrod.

Audra had become quite the actress when it came to keeping the family in the fog of what was happening in her life. Thankfully, Eugene was traveling overseas and Victoria had no memory of the kiss shared between Audra and Heath. Therefore, none were the wiser of Audra's love for Heath. When Victoria questioned how Ruiz found out, Audra played the innocent and explained Martinez told him. She even claimed she tried to stop Martinez.

Audra wanted to lash out at them all. Nick was the exception to her wrath as she knew how much he had wanted to go help Heath immediately. Of course, that was countered by Victoria and Jarrod as they plotted a way to help Heath and keep the general safe at the same time. Audra understood the reasoning but she feared it was taking too long. The desperate decision to let Ruiz know of Heath's capture was for Heath's rescue to be put into motion.

The telegram telling of Ruiz's death but Heath's successful rescue caused Audra to feel sorrow for Pepe, Ruiz's son. That was short lived when she thought of Heath's own endurance as a child in a war. Pepe was older than Heath was at the time. The Barkleys didn't come to the beautiful blonde child's rescue. Pepe would have those to help him through this. To teach him how to be a man like his father. Heath didn't have a father to emulate. Those facts alone didn't allow Audra to feel too much guilt due to her joy of knowing Heath was alive and heading home.

Audra desperately wanted to see the man she loved. The need was smothering her as deeply as the fog sometimes stretched over the valley. She could see nothing else but the desire to hold Heath in her arms.

Heath was having his own bouts with trying to come to terms with his decision to not pursue a relationship with Audra. He had not been tempted by the beautiful Teresa Alfredo even if she made it plain she found interest in him. Heath couldn't get Audra from his mind or from his heart. The thoughts of Audra only intensified when he was locked away in the Mexican prison.

The fear of imprisonment was hid by his actions. Those actions were only a facade. In reality, Heath had to fight the demons of Carterson all over again. The putrid food, the uncleanness of his body, and the flogging all added up to haunting memories. Heath realized he was able to fight those old demons when he thought of returning home to see Audra's smile and to feel Audra's touch. Heath felt he could endure anything as long as he knew he'd someday see Audra's face again.

Once they were in United States territory again, the Barkley brothers made it to a small town to rest up, get bathed, and eat. Jarrod sent a telegram to the ranch explaining the rescue and the death of Ruiz.

Nick and Jarrod were worried about their brother's health when he seemed to almost fall off his horse. Therefore, they insisted he see the town doctor. That is where they discovered that Heath was flogged and malnourished. Jarrod and Nick tried to insist that they stay in the town so that Heath could heal. Heath refused adamantly due to wanting to get home. The older brothers never realized that Heath's reason for wanting to get home so badly was Audra. The brothers would take a train the rest of the way home. They telegraphed ahead to have their horses waiting on them at the Stocktom livery so they could ride out to the ranch. Heath could at least rest up on the train in the days it took to get home.

Audra waited with bated breath as she knew that Heath should be home any minute. She felt her heart pounding against her chest in a harsh thuds. She knew he had said it was over between them. She would honor those wishes. That didn't deter her from wanting to see him.

When the three Barkley brothers road up to the ranch house, Audra ran towards them not caring to hide how much she wanted to see Heath. Victoria waited on the porch starting to reprimand Audra for her actions. A lady should wait to greet someone. Victoria thought better of scalding Audra when she saw Heath practically leap off Charger to meet Audra half way.

The couple embraced tightly. Heath picked Audra up off the ground and held her for several minutes refusing to let his tight grip on her loose. Heath nor Audra said a word as they melted into one another. Both were afraid their emotions would reveal to the family their true feelings for one another. Therefore, silence remained as they continued to hold one another in each other's arms.

Nick, Jarrod, and Victoria all mistook the embrace for fondness of siblings. Victoria stepping forward brought the couple back to reality. The desperate need to feel each other's presence was replaced by the guilt of hurting the mother they both loved. Heath and Audra moved back from one another. The looked at each other briefly with desperate pleading in their eyes. Then they turned to Victoria as she spoke.

"I'd like to enjoy your brother's attention too, Audra." Victoria spread out her arms to Heath. "Let me see my lovely son."


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43: Twelve days**

For twelve days, Heath had been back from Mexico. For twelve days, Heath Barkley fought his attraction to Audra. For twelve days, he tried to keep from touching her even in the most innocent of ways. For twelve days, Audra had longed for one moment with Heath alone.

Heath had a few nightmares. Nick was there to wake him up. Heath thanked him as always. Heath guessed the nightmares came with the territory of being imprisoned again. What Heath didn't count on was the other dreams. The dreams of holding Audra and kissing her. Heath even had dreams that caused him to be guilt ridden. Audra wasn't helping with her soulful looks at him. It seemed the more Heath fought off his desire for Audra, the more his dreams became erotic. _Boy howdy, wouldn't his mama take a switch to his hide if she knew?_ Leah Thomson didn't use a wooden spoon like Nick told of Victoria. She used God's nature to discipline her son.

Heath did his best to stay clear of Audra. He knew it was causing Audra more anger than hurt. Heath didn't know how to mask his love for Audra if she was near. He was sure that Nick would catch on. After all, Nick knew Heath the best. He didn't relish getting beat by Nick. Heath was still too tired and weak from the Mexican prison to take on his older brother in the name of Nick's sister's honor.

Twelve days was all it took for the whole facade of brother and sister to crumble down at the feet of the blonde Barkleys. Twelve days would lead to some very intense soul searching on the parts of Audra and Heath.

"I'm going to stay at the line shack on the west end tonight. That stream is swelling big so a few of the men will be placing some sandbags." Nick explained to Heath as he packed his saddlebags.

Both brothers glanced at the peppering of rain. The sound of thunder cracked in the distance warning that the rain was only going to grow stronger.

"Do ya need my help?" Heath picked up his own saddle bags to pack.

"No. You stay here and take care of getting the men their duties tomorrow. Doc says you should still take it easy with your back." Nick took a bite of dried jerky before placing the rest in his bag. "Silas cooked me up some good stuff for tomorrow. I'm going to take it easy once the bags are in place. I figure this storm will pass by early morning. Jarrod and Mother will probably stay at Evelyn Greene's tonight. I'm glad Audra didn't want to go with Mother. She hates Patrick Greene being all moon eyed over her. She'd have hated having to stay the night with a sixteen year old boy staring at her all cow eyed. This storm is too bad to travel back in. I suppose we'll all meet for breakfast as usual."

Heath nodded as he helped saddle up one of the horses from the remuda. "Iffin' you're sure you don't need me. I guess I can get a little rest tonight. Slept part ways good last night but it has been a few days."

"Nightmares over?" Nick glanced at his brother worriedly.

"No. But I'm coping." Heath patted Nick's back. "Don't worry none about me, big brother. I'll be fine."

"I can send other men…." Nick spoke but was interrupted by Heath's reassurance.

"I"ll be fine, Nick. You'll worry yourself if you don't check out the stream." Heath rocked on his feet. Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. "Like I said, I guess I'll turn in early tonight."

"Well, hold down the fort then." Nick mounted his horse. "See you at breakfast."

Heath watched as his brother rode off towards the west pasture. He took in a deep breath before heading back into the house. He decided to eat supper in his room. There he'd be safe not facing Audra alone. He wasn't sure how he could handle his effort to stop their forbidden relationship if he spent time with her alone without the pretense of brother/sister relationship.

Audra watched as Heath gathered his food from Silas. She stirred her own dinner trying not to stomp after Heath. If he wanted to ignore her and pretend there was nothing between them, she would do that.

Audra pushed back her plate as her appetite left her. She walked over to stare at the rain pouring outside. She closed her eyes as she thought of her life. Audra didn't know why but she had sudden sadness envelope her. She missed her father, Tom Barkley, so immensely. Life was so much simpler when she was a little girl being her daddy's princess. Audra had called Tom by the name of daddy until his death. After that, she spoke in terms of him being father to her.

"Oh, Daddy." Audra wept. "Why didn't you at least check on Leah? Things wouldn't be so complicated if you had. I love Heath, Daddy. I love him so very much it hurts."

Audra glanced at the large tree that stood by the corral. She chuckled as she swiped her hands over her wet cheeks. "I remember when I was upset, Daddy. You'd tell me that you were the king and wanted to dance with your princess under that tree. I remember you said you wanted to dance as many dances as you could with me before someday a prince would steal my heart. Daddy, a prince has. It is your very own son. The prince who looks most like the king according to Mother. You never looked like Heath to me. But Mother insists he is a copy of you down to his walk. She said the only difference is Heath's drawl when he speaks. She admitted that she knew the moment she saw him that Heath was your son. He may be your son, daddy. But Heath is my prince."

Audra pushed open the door and walked into the rain. She went directly to under the tree. She spoke in a whisper. "Dance with me, Daddy."

Audra spun around in circles holding out her arms as she remembered how easy it was for her father, Tom Barkley, to halt her tears by a simple dance with his little girl. Audra twirled around as she imagined standing on Tom Barkley's feet as he held tightly to his little girl as they danced.

Heath stood up from the bed as he heard the faint sobs from below his window. He watched as Audra gracefully danced in the rain. He closed his eyes trying to hide the beautiful sight of the woman he loved.

Heath cursed under his breath at the urge to go to her. To hold her against him and kiss the sadness from her. He opened his eyes again to watch Audra's continued ballet. Heath's hands gripped the window sill as he bit his bottom lip.

She was exquisite.

Every part of Audra was being bared to him at that moment. Her mind, her soul, and even her body.

Her mind. The dance revealed Audra was lost in another time and place. She was escaping the pain of sorrow by visiting something precious in her past.

Her soul. The tears couldn't be seen due to the rain drops mingling with them on her face. Heath knew they were there. Tears that told of her hurt. Hurt he was causing.

Her body. The water cascaded over the beauty of her womanly form as her clothing clung to her. She was every bit of a woman as he was a man. Every delicate movement allowed Audra's body to be revealed in the perfect waltz.

Heath clutched the window sill tighter until his knuckles whitened. He fought his fervent yearning to go to her. To kiss her with reckless abandon. To make Audra his in every way. Knowing his craving for her could never be quenched, Heath started to step away from the window. As he started to leave the lovely vision of Audra dancing, Audra fell to the ground.

Heath could see her shoulders were wracked with sobs. Heath swallowed before he ran to her. She needed him. He'd have to fight his demons to comfort her.

Heath stooped beside of Audra. He grabbed her chin pulling her face to look at him. "Let me get you in the house, Audra."

Audra sobbed as she struck Heath's face. " I can't stop feeling! How could you stop feeling?"

"I haven't." Heath tried to pick Audra up in his arms but she pushed him away.

"Why? Why?" Audra cried as she smacked her fist against Heath's chest. "Why are you letting me go?"

"It would be selfish." Heath tried to explain as he sunk his knees into the mud. "Can't you see that?"

Audra shook her head as she cried into her hands. "I'm selfish! I would do anything for you. Anything. I made sure Ruiz knew. I made sure he knew!"

Heath grabbed Audra by the shoulders. He shook her slightly until she peered up at him. "What are you saying?"

Audra looked up as shame hit her. "I couldn't let you die in his place. I couldn't. I know I'm not worthy of you because I'm weak. When it comes to you I'm so weak."

"No." Heath pulled Audra to him. His arms went around her as he clung to her. "I'm weak. That's why I'm staying away from ya. Don't you see that? If that was you taken, I'd have done the same. But I can't be selfish, Audra. I can't hurt all of them for me."

Audra leaned up to look at him. She place her hand against Heath's cheek. "Haven't you ever wanted to be selfish, Heath? Just once didn't you ever want to go against their wishes for your own? Can't you be selfish for me?"


	44. Chapter 44

**A/N. WARNING sexual situations**

 **Chapter 43: Becoming Selfish**

Heath slid his arms around Audra's body. He easily picked her up to carry her into the house. Heath placed Audra down in the foyer before turning to look at her in a longing which caused Audra's breath to hitch in her throat.

Heath took in a sharp intake of air before making his way upstairs. He looked back at her once more.

"I gotta figure this out first, Audra." He stared back down the stairs at the blonde temptress, who didn't realize the power she held over him.

Audra bit back her bottom lip as she watched Heath slowly enter his bedroom. She chewed her lips nervously before jaunting up the stairs after him. Audra was tired of Heath calling all the shots. She would speak her mind then he could speak his.

Audra pushed open Heath's door ready to talk some sense into him. She stopped abruptly at the sight of the gorgeous man in front of her. He was shirtless but his body still was moist due to the rain. Every muscle was in fine definition for her to view. Heath turned to toss his wet shirt on the back of a chair. His back told of the horrors of his short lived life.

Audra saw the scars differently. She saw Heath's power to endure. She saw the pain but she also so the beauty of a story of strength, bravery and even love. To have lived through what Heath had, love was something she knew he clung to for survival. In Carterson, it was the love for his mama. In the Mexican prison, it was another type love. It was the love for a woman. That woman was her.

Heath glanced up with pain filled eyes. Audra knew at that moment they both wanted the same thing. Each other.

Heath raked his hands through his unruly blonde hair. He couldn't get the feeling of Audra's body soaked by the rain against his own body from his mind. She was beyond beautiful. Much to Heath's dismay, Heath was entranced by her. He paced back and forth in front of the beautiful girl as he clenched his fists tightly. Audra stared at him as she wondered what she had said or had done to cause such a fierce reaction in the normally placid cowboy.

He stepped up to her as he stared at her. Audra's haunting words taunting him. _"_ _Haven't you ever wanted to be selfish, Heath? Just once didn't you ever want to go against their wishes for your own? Can't you be selfish for me?"_

Audra could feel her chest heaving as her breathing picked up. She bit her lip staring defiantly at Heath. Her fear was evident in her eyes. Yet, she would never back down and give up this new found feeling of desiring this man.

She felt her breath rush out of her lungs when Heath pulled her to him in an embrace. Her clothing was still wet as it clung to every inch of her body. She felt the heat of his skin ignite her despite the coldness of her wet clothing.

Heath's breath was right against her cheek. Strangely, he didn't stink as Audra would expect. She used to hate the smell of the ranch hands and Nick after a cattle drive. She welcomed the masculine scent of Heath. He smelled of rawhide and leather mixed with the earthen outdoors. However, she was concentrating on the breath against her skin. She was thinking of his fingers entangled in her wet tendrils of hair _._ Her thoughts were on Heath's body's reaction to her. His desire obviou _s._ Audra knew as a man expected to be thought of as a brother, she should never allow the pleasing thought to even pass her mind.

Her thoughts of his breath against her cheek halted when she felt Heath's mouth encompassed hers. Heath always showed his expertise at kissing. This was no exception. If anything, the kiss was more heated and showed a yearning for much more. Audra's knees buckled slightly at Heath's delving into the kiss with a a want and a need for her. Her head swam as her body caught fire to the feel of his hands upon her.

Audra could feel her heart thumping against her chest. She wanted his lips on hers. She never expected to experience such pleasure in a simple kiss. Of course, Heath's kiss was all but simple. Heath's tongue slowly licked Audra's lips. He sucked in her lower lip as his tongue collided with her teeth. She moaned as she opened her mouth slightly. Heath grinned as he touched her tongue with his own. She felt weak and hot.

Heath's hand searched for the fastening on Audra's dress. His hold on her was too strong and his body too enticing to fight off his advances. She was too tired and weak from her days of fighting temptation. She was tired of being ignored by him.

His eyes were mysterious because they were windows into Heath's soul. Pale blue orbs danced until they were almost black due to the desire built up in him. His eyes were like a night sky when the lightening flashed.

Heath's eyes usually looked like the clear ocean. Now his eyes were a darkened blue like the shallow puddles after a hard rain. She could see herself wading in those waters as she got deeper lost in each step they were taking.

His strong thighs gripped around her toned legs as he undressed her. Each sinewy muscle tightened with Audra's trembling body. Heath's good looks caused her to inhale sharply. They were crossing into dangerous territory but both continued to wade deeper. They knew they would soon drown in one another.

Before Audra knew it, her dress was completely undone. It became a puddle at her feet. His well built chest pressed against her own. The cold air caused her body to react. _Or had it_? She swallowed pretending to herself that it was of fear of knowing a man. Heath's hands were strong as he took off her clothing. Never glancing down at her now nudeness until she was completely bare to him.

Heath swooped her up in his arms. He carried her to his bed. He stepped back a few steps to appreciate the visage of Audra.

Audra knew she was putting aside her own morals for a chance to have him. A chance to have this man show her what it felt like to be a woman.

Audra bit her lip unsure of what she was allowing to happen. But one thing was for sure. It was up to her and her alone to stop this. Heath wasn't about to.

She leaned up on her elbows to note things were going too far. Audra knew she needed to say no. She needed to stop him. But once again her words were cut short when Heath unbuckled his pants. He grinned slyly as he slowly pulled his belt from the loops on his pants. The clanking of the metal belt buckle hitting the floor almost brought her back to her senses. Heath then sauntered up to the bed. Heath placed one knee on the bed beside of Audra's shoulder. His other foot stayed on the floor.

Audra couldn't help but to notice how perfectly toned his body was. Her mouth became dry as she peered up at him.

"You really need to speak up if you don't want this." Heath sweetly warned her. His voice was soaked in sexual desire. "The fact is, Audra, I've wanted you for a long time."

Audra gulped when Heath leaned over. He wrapped his fingers in her hair and pulled her towards him. His tongue teased her lips once more. This caused Audra to react by entangling her own fingers in Heath's hair. She could feel the dampness of his locks at the nape of his neck. He was perspiring along with the rain drenching him before.

She could feel the bed give as Heath climbed in beside her. Audra closed her eyes in fright. Heath held her wrists by one hand as he brought them over her head.

Audra watched as he leaned down to kiss her skin on her neck. Soon his tongue was caressing her neck like an expert sculptor's fingers on clay. Audra realized she was being molded as he wanted her to be. However, she didn't try to stop him. Instead her hands wriggled against his grasp because of anticipation of his next taste of her skin.

Audra had never been this far with any one. She didn't know why she never spoke up. Heath's every move was enticing her to beg for more. Or frightening her into pleading to bring this to a halt. Yet, she bit her lip and said nothing.

Heath moved back up to Audra's lips. She longed for his tongue to battle with hers again. She got her desire. Heath soon was kissing her again more heatedly than before. She thought she was delirious. She had to be considering she wasn't stopping this. All the power was in one little word. 'STOP!' One little word that she never uttered.

Heath released Audra's wrists as he continued his salacious kissing. Audra's hands grasped his shoulders. She felt the risen skin caused by the flogging. A reminder of Heath's months away from her. A reminder of what she could have lost if he were taken from her. Her hands slid slowly down his back as her fingers traced the evidence of his torture.

Audra gripped Heath tighter to her. She feared letting him go. Heath took it as a signal to continue.

She squeezed her eyes shut as the pain sent shock waves throughout her innocent body. Heath's face was nuzzled deep into the crook of Audra's neck.

"Hurts." Audra finally got out between her labored breath and clenched teeth.

Heath stared at Audra. He spoke softly with such tenderness. Yet his voice was laced with a husky lust. "Too much?"

Audra felt a tear roll down her cheek. Heath wiped it away with his finger. "Answer me. Please." Heath leaned down. He bit Audra's lip seductively. He sucked in her tongue teasingly. "I don't want to stop. But I will. I will do anything for you. You hafta know that, Angel. "

"No." Audra gripped Heath's shoulders again. Her nails dug into his skin. She didn't feel like an angel. None of their actions were angelic. Even in her conviction of their act, Audra wanted Heath. "Just…you …I want you."

Audra didn't know what to think. She knew he'd stop if she asked. But she didn't want him to. She didn't know if they stopped if the relationship would end and go back to the insecurity of it. But that was only part of her reason for wanting him to continue. The other part was the sudden heated pleasure her body was feeling with Heath.

Pain was subsiding as pleasure replaced it. Audra knew that Heath had her where he wanted her. She was putty in his hands. She felt herself melting into the euphoria of being Heath Barkley's lover.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45: His Father's Son**

When their moment was over, Audra felt an emptiness over take her. Not because of Heath's lovemaking. He was gentle with her. He treated her like a breakable porcelain doll. She never realized a woman could feel such pleasure despite the pain of the first time. Heath had shown her how making love should be. However, the emptiness came from within her due to the act itself. Try as she might, Audra couldn't stop the tears that came. First, they were slow tears that snuck over her long eyelashes to caress her soft cheeks. Then Audra began to sob with a harshness that shook her whole body.

Sitting up to lean against the headboard of his bed, Heath gripped her tightly to him. He whispered apologies for what he had taken from her. No. Not taken. She had freely gave of herself to him. While the act was happening, Audra had even called his name in soft whispers of wanton desire for him.

"Please, darling. Forgive me." Heath's drawl came out in a plead of forgiveness.

Audra clung to him allowing her tears to trail down his bare chest. "No. Heath. No. I'm not crying for giving myself to you. I wanted you. I still want you. I'm crying for the sin I know I've committed. I'm crying for the weakness of desiring you so much. Mostly, I'm crying because I want you more now."

Heath pulled her to him almost completely taking her body into his lap. This caused his body to react due to wanting her again but he ignored it. After all, he hadn't been with a woman for months due to falling for Audra. Now he had been and now he was fighting a deeper temptation for this woman.

He kissed the crown of her head. "I love you, Audra. I love you so much. I'll make this right. Some how. I'll make this right."

Audra's heartbeat raced. He had never said the words before to her. Although she had no doubt of the sincerity, she still longed to take back their love making and save it for a marriage bed. There would be no sadness in a marriage bed. She would be elated that the man she loved was hers for an eternity.

Audra's sobbing was now back to slow trickling of tears down her cheek onto Heath's bare chest. She didn't see his own silent tears. He didn't know how to fix what he had allowed to happen. He couldn't take it back. He was sure he didn't want to take it back for himself but for her. For her, he wanted nothing more than to take the last few hours and redo them. He wanted to give Audra back the innocence that was no longer hers.

Heath closed his eyes as he ran his fingers through Audra's soft hair. He inhaled her scent of lavender and lilacs. Slowly, he pushed Audra from his body. Audra felt alone even with him standing by the bed. He walked away grabbing his jeans as he did. Audra blinked twice. _How could she have allowed this to have happened? Worse. Why did she pray he'd take her again?_

The fact was that she had loved him for so long. To have him touch her so intimately had been in her thoughts so many times. Her fantasies were made up of Heath's body taking hers. The pleasure surpassed her wildest imaginations. However, the emotional emptiness and pain she was feeling equated to her worst nightmare.

She heard Heath putting on his pants. It frightened her in a childish way because she wanted him to hold her longer. Audra's eyes closed as she tried to abate another onslaught of tears. Heath wasn't going to hold her. He was done with her. Suddenly, she felt used.

Audra opened her eyes when she heard Heath's door close after he walked out of the room. She felt her heart break as she clung to Heath's pillow. His masculine scent still lingered in the room. She stirred around feeling lost and unsure. _Had she not pleased him as he did her? Was she too naïve for his liking in woman?_ So many insecurities bombarded her with the fact Heath had left her alone.

Audra could feel herself snubbing like a little child after a loud storm. However, she had no one to crawl beside to comfort her. She closed her eyes. They felt sticky and swollen with tears. How long had she been lying there holding her knees under her chin? She didn't know. But her tears had ceased unlike the shame and emotional pain of Heath's abandonment.

She sniffed as she wiped her small hand over her aching eyes. She pulled Heath's shirt from the chair to wipe her running nose. She didn't care how gross or unclean it was. She felt dirty anyway. She could smell his scent on the shirt. She clutched the blue material between her fingers. Her insecurities made her question herself once more. _Why had he left her alone without a word? Was she that inexperienced that she displeased him? Was her body not pleasant enough to look at? Were her kisses too sloppy?_ She had always prided herself on the one act of intimacy of a kiss. She felt she had mastered that act. But Heath made her doubt everything from her body to her touches.

Audra watched as a white line of light hit the wall in front of her. The door was opening. _Was it Heath coming to laugh in her face for giving into him so easil_ y? Audra closed her eyes feigning sleep. She heard the door close again. She wanted to yell at him. But what did he really do wrong? She allowed him to act with her body without commitment. He had told her to stop him if she didn't want it to happen. But she did want it to happen. She just wanted it to end with his arms snaked around her in passion….in love.

Many minutes passed as Audra lay in Heath's bed feeling alone and confused. She wanted to run to her mother and allow Victoria to hold her. She wanted to scream at Heath for taking what she freely gave. Mostly, she wanted Heath to wrap his strong arms around her and tell her he still wanted to be her lover.

Audra's eyes closed quickly when she heard Heath's door reopen. Before she could register what was happening, she felt Heath's strong arms pick her up. He wrapped her in a small blanket before carrying her from his room. _Did he want his bed to himself?_ Audra felt powerless to speak or to protest his actions. He cradled her against his chest. Audra didn't know why she didn't protest. Nor did she know why she began to cry on his shoulder. She just let it happen.

Soon, Audra realized she was misjudging the situation. Her own fear of inadequacy was taunting her with deceit. Heath was only trying to make things more wonderful. More perfect. More beautiful as it should've been if they were married.

He lowered Audra in the bathtub filled with warm water and lilac smelling bubbles. Heath washed her skin from the sweat that had accumulated due to their lovemaking. Audra looked at him. Her tears no longer flowing allowed her to see what he was trying to do. Heath had bathed himself quickly so he was clean for her. He had made a special effort to make her bath she would enjoy. Candles set around the bathing room causing the aura of romance. He had done this for her.

As Heath washed her hair, he whispered her name with such love and gentleness. "My sweet, beautiful Audra. You own my heart now, lil' lady. Be gentle with it."

His linen sleep pants became wet on the knees. He didn't seem to care. His large hands cupped water. He poured the water over Audra's hair slowly.

She sniffed as tears came down her cheek. "Heath?" She was almost afraid to say his name.

"I didn't mean to hurt you." Heath was almost inaudible.

"You didn't." Audra swallowed.

"We shoulda been married. I never been with an innocent before. I hurt ya." Heath kept his head down staring at the bubbles that surrounded Audra to hide her nudity.

"Oh." Audra sunk down deeper in the tub. Her chin touched the bubbles making a white beard form around her chin. "I think that is normal." She shrugged. Audra didn't think it hurt so much as it was pleasurable. She was too embarrassed to say those words to him.

Audra relaxed to his soft touch. She allowed Heath's gentle nature to envelope her and drive out the sadness that she knew would come again. For now, she would enjoy the moment for what it was. A man and a woman becoming lovers.

Once again, Heath was treating her like a breakable treasure. He had carried her to her own bedroom not his room. He dried her off with soft towels and whispered again and again how much he loved her. Heath allowed his soft words to speak from his heart.

"Dress in this." Heath's voice said huskily. He turned and placed on Audra a dry shirt of his.

Heath gave her sufficient time to calm. Then he turned to her. "Crawl in the bed, darlin'."

Audra started to say no that they needed to talk. But when loud clap of thunder sounded, Audra jumped into the bed pulling the bedding over her body. Heath crawled in next to her. He turned Audra away from him. He spooned her body to his.

When the thunder and lightning continued outside, another storm of hearts was brewing on the inside. Audra shook nervously.

Heath pulled her tighter to him. "I want to marry you, Audra Cartwright. I want you to know that."

He could feel her body shaking and her breathing harder with each sound that the storm made and with each sound of heartbeats echoing inside of them.

"I suppose this is how my father felt with my mother as far as feelin' he took somethin' he shouldn't have." It was the first time Heath had referred to Tom Barkley as his own father. "I guess I can understand him more. Lovin' someone so much that they need 'em. Maybe that's why my mama and my father created me. Maybe they were in love but he loved your mama more. That's okay. I reckon. But no one can be loved more than you right now, Audra."

Audra's body relaxed as he spoke. Heath didn't plan on touching Audra's skin. He didn't want his fingers to be making circles on her stomach. He didn't want to think her body was the most beautiful he had seen. That she was the most beautiful.

Heath didn't want to have given into his desires. He didn't want to have betrayed the Barkleys as he felt he had.

"Heath." Audra whispered. Her doubt had dissipated as she felt his fingers placing feathery touches on her skin. "I love you too."

Audra could feel the tenseness in Heath fade away at her declaration of love. They both lay in silence basking in the love they held in their hearts despite the guilt that bombarded their souls.

"The storm is easin'." Heath bit his bottom lip trying to control his obvious desire for the female. "Do you want me to go back to my room?"

Audra didn't wish that. She wished to feel the tightness of this man's arms around her. She knew it was wrong doing as they had done. Yet, she was not willing to give up the feeling of this comfort. She was not willing to give up loving Heath. She shook her head no so he'd stay. She could tell he wanted to stay with her as much as she wanted him to.

"I'll have to leave ya in the mornin', Audra." Heath whispered into her ear. Audra rolled so that her head rested on Heath's chest. "Not cause I want to. I have to get up early and work the ranch. But I want you to know when you wake up and I'm gone from beside ya, I ain't too far to find. I'll just be leavin' the bed. Otherwise, I'm here and if ya don't want me to go anywhere. I ain't gonna."

Heath needed her to know that he was not leaving her. This was something not trivial to him. It wasn't only about his selfish needs but his love for her. As he looked over at Audra, he saw her finally succumb to sleep. She was his angel. She was his breath to breathe.

For that moment, he saw what his father must have seen when he looked down at his mama. Youth, beauty, and innocence. For the first time in his life, Heath Barkley understood Tom Barkley. His own weakness had betrayed him as he had betrayed the Barkley family. He was his father's son.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46:Around the Breakfast Table**

Heath blinked a few times as he watched Jarrod and Victoria arriving just after the sun peaked over the horizon. He had already put in a couple of tough hours on the ranch. Heading back to the house, Heath had hoped to get to spend some time alone with Audra to have a much needed discussion. It looked like that wasn't going to happen now.

Nick had already been there as Heath saw Coco in his stall fed and curried. Heath couldn't help but wonder if Audra were awake and if she was, what was she doing or thinking. Heath slid his hand over his bicep as he cautiously headed to the house.

Things had to change. He had to let the family know he loved Audra. It was the only way to make things right for her. The truth was that Heath wanted to marry Audra. He wanted it more than a man wanted a sip of water in a desert. Last night, Heath had allowed the selfishness of his wants over those in his family. Now that he had taken that step, he wanted Audra to be his completely as a wife. He loved her. He couldn't imagine being happier than with Audra by his side.

Entering the dining area, he noticed his brothers and mother sitting in their usual places. Audra had yet to come down. Heath readied himself to put on the best poker face he could muster up. It was Silas's look to him that almost made Heath buckle over.

Silas looked at Heath with pity mixed with a hint of anger. _Great. Just great._ Heath had forgotten about Silas being in the house. He had forgotten Silas would be picking up the laundry in the bedrooms. The man rarely had to clean too much in Heath's room as Heath felt it was his duty to clean his own room and bring down his own laundry. That wasn't the case this morning. Heath had forgotten to pick up the dirty, discarded clothing of Audra's and his own. Worse than that. Heath had forgotten to change his sheets or more so burn the blasted things. After all, the innocence of Audra would be evident on the sheets.

Heath made his way to the table that held various drinks such as milk, juice, or coffee. Silas always put extra there for the Barkleys to serve themselves their beverages. Silas poured more juice in the pitcher as Heath stood there pretending to pour some coffee.

"She's not my sister." Heath whispered for only Silas's ears. He knew the man knew what happened. It was more than obvious.

"I know that." Silas whispered back. "But she's a lady none the less. One deserving of…"

"I know what Audra deserves." Heath squeezed the coffee mug tightly. "More than anyone. I know that."

"See that you do, Mr. Heath." Silas glanced at the young man, who he cherished beyond words. The boy was special to him. Silas worried for the young Barkley since the day he arrived. They had bonded as friends. However, Audra was born after Silas began to work for the Barkleys. Silas wanted to protect them all if he could.

Heath nodded his understanding. He added with deepest sincerity. "I love her."

"I know that too." Silas chuckled slightly under his breath.

Silas and Heath could say no more as Nick boisterously interrupted. "What are you two whispering about? Silas, you better not let Heath convince you to make more grits for him! Or sneak him more pie. I know that you do! I like pie too!"

Silas turned to smile at Nick as Heath made his way to sit at the table. "Now, Mr. Nick, the boy does need to keep up his strength. After all, this is a working ranch."

The faithful house servant smiled as he left the family to enjoy a good laugh. Nick even laughed as he knew the family said it was his trademark words.

"Audra must be very tired today. I'm surprised she didn't greet us." Jarrod buttered his toast as he spoke.

The family already said grace over breakfast thinking Audra was sleeping in. Often times, Heath missed breakfast with the family due to working on the ranch. Therefore, the family didn't wait for the blonde Barkleys.

Heath looked down at his plate. Guilt ridden, Heath decided to do as he always did. He would let the family talk around him. Nick spoke about the stream being kept from flooding due to the diligent work by the men. Jarrod and Victoria spoke of the Greenes and how Widow Greene and her children were fairing.

When Audra finally made her way into the room, her eyes told the tale that she had been crying. Heath almost knocked his chair over as he stood to pull out a chair for Audra.

"Easy there, Heath. You're gonna knock the whole table over. I'm sure Audra can take a seat without your help." Nick laughed at his younger brother. Nick figured his little brother noticed their little sister's forlorn look.

Audra settled beside of Heath. She spoke softly with a strained voice. "Pass me the syrup. Please."

"Are you okay, Audra?" Victoria asked concerned as she noticed her daughter's blotchy face. "Has something happened?"

"Nothing for you to worry over, Mother." Audra smiled weakly. "Last night I had an overwhelming thought of missing father. Last night effected me more than I expected."

It wasn't a lie but that was definitely not the reason that Audra had been crying. Heath wanted to take Audra in his arms and make her see how much he loved her. Of course that wasn't possible considering those sitting around the breakfast table.

"Oh, sweetheart." Victoria sighed softly. She reached to clasp Audra's hand. "That happens to me sometimes. Missing your father hits me when I least expect it. I wish I had been here for you."

Audra swallowed slightly. Part of her wished her mother was here at the house last night. Then what happened with Heath would have never happened. The bigger part of her was glad her mother wasn't there. If she was, then what happened with Heath would have never happened.

Audra inhaled before stating. "I'm glad you were gone. Perhaps being alone helped me to put things into perspective. I've been needing to do that for a while now. Besides. the night was filled with good memories even if regrets are there as well."

Heath didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing in Audra's words. He mindlessly reached for the syrup at the same time Audra did. Their fingers touched. Audra jerked back so fast the syrup spilled on her clothing. It was like touching his skin ignited her own.

Audra jumped up and ran from the room. Victoria started to stand but Heath was quicker.

"You eat, Mother." Heath stated as he placed down his napkin. "I'm sure ya'll are hungry. I'll talk to Audra. If she needs ya, I'll call."

Victoria looked wearily at Heath. "I suppose…"

Heath didn't wait for her to agree. He quickly bound up the stairs to find Audra. He stopped her before she entered her bedroom.

"Audra, wait!" Heath called after her.

Audra leaned against the wall as she allowed Heath to approach her. She looked at him with tear filled eyes.

"I feel like I should have the letter A on my clothing." Audra referred to the book "Scarlet Letter ". Heath hadn't read the novel but he knew of it. He didn't like her making a reference to herself in that manner.

"Audra please don't. It wasn't like that. Let's go on a lunch picnic and talk about this. I'll ask Silas to pack us a nice basket. Neither one of us ate much just now." Heath hopefully suggested.

Audra leaned on the hall wall placing her hands flatly against it. "They know what we did."

"No they don't." Heath pushed his hands deep in his pockets. He leaned on the wall adjacent Audra. He propped one booted foot against it. The thought passed through his mind that he hoped he didn't have dirt on his boots. Silas wouldn't like him messing the walls. "Maybe Silas does."

"Silas! Oh no. Oh no. He thinks I'm a harlot. A terrible person. I am. Aren't I?" Audra wanted to run and hide from life.

"Don't say that." Heath couldn't take Audra being so distraught. He pushed himself off the wall and pulled her to him. Even though she tried to shirk away from him, he wrapped one arm around her while he placed his other hand in her hair. Smoothing her hair as he allowed Audra to cry on his chest. "Please don't say that. You're not that. You're my angel. I wish I could fix this. I wish we had married first. But I don't regret being with you as far as feelings. I don't regret last night for myself."

Another fear struck Audra as Heath tried to soothe her. "I was terrible. Wasn't I?" She peered up at Heath as her doe like eyes spoke of her doubt in herself. She whispered as if her words were a forbidden utterance. "Was I okay?"

Heath chuckled slightly at her innocent need to know if she pleased him. He kept his arm tightly around her. "Darlin', you were perfect."

Panic set in even stronger at her next bombardment of thoughts. She pushed away from Heath harshly. "What if I'm pregnant?"

Heath cupped Audra's face in his hands. His thumbs wiped away the tears on her cheeks. "You're not."

"How do you know?" Audra whimpered as she clutched Heath's forearms.

"I know how to be safe and prevent it." Heath assured her as he again pulled her into an embrace. "Trust me."

"Okay." Audra did trust him. She trusted him to make everything right again.


	47. Chapter 47

**C** **hapter 47: Will Ya Be Mine?**

Heath knew one thing for certain. That was that he loved Audra more every day. That caused him the physical desire for her that he had been denying himself since the first time they were together. Therefore, every time Heath was around Audra, he found himself wanting to touch her physically. A scrape of his fingers on her back was only a small gesture but was enough to elicit the desires to escalate in both Audra and him.

Therefore, in order to keep from repeating the sin of a few weeks earlier, Heath made a decision to go speak to Jarrod. He knew that if he didn't, Audra and he would repeat the mistake of being intimate again. The two didn't want to stay away from each other. Both decided that absence wasn't working. As the saying goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder. It also makes desire more as well.

Heath was always an expert at getting information he wanted without revealing too much. He knew Jarrod would be a little trickier to obtain information from without revealing why. After all, Jarrod was an astute lawyer. Therefore, Heath knew to approach Jarrod when he was on a case. Heath also knew Jarrod would make time for family despite needing to be working. Heath took full of advantage of this knowledge when he went into Jarrod's office.

Anna, Jarrod's long time secretary, blushed when Heath walked through the door. Heath gave her a slight wink as he usual greeting. If there was one thing Heath Barkley had learned from an early age, it was how to charm people especially women. Being born a bastard made Heath try to be on the best side of people. Therefore, he knew who to avoid and who he could charm. He also knew how to read people well. Therefore, the small flirtation was innocent enough. It also got Heath in the door without much questioning from Anna. The little wink he gave her always caused the woman to be tongue tied. He knew how much of a chatterbox Anna could be. She never was with him due to the nod or wink from the ruggedly handsome Heath Barkley.

"Go right on in, Heath." Anna stuttered out as her face flushed.

Jarrod was inside his office hearing the exchange. He often got a chuckle from how Anna became the blushing shy female when Heath was around. Jarrod knew Heath flirted on purpose to keep Anna from chattering on. Heath was a man of few words and preferred most other people to be the same with him.

"Brother Heath, come in. Take a seat." Jarrod smiled as he watched Heath shut the office door. He knew the young cowboy didn't come to his office when he knew Jarrod was on a case unless he needed advice. "What can I do for you?"

Heath pulled off his Stetson as he sat down in the chair in front of Jarrod's desk. Heath acted nonchalant. "Well, I was wantin' to ask you a question of legalities of marriage."

Jarrod's head snapped up at Heath's utterance. He feared his little brother may have gotten himself in a mess with a female. Although he didn't picture Heath doing so. That was more something Nick may have happen to him.

"You're not in trouble are you, Heath?" Jarrod's eyes bore into Heath. Then Jarrod went on to another possible reason for Heath asking such a question. May as well cover all bases, Jarrod thought. Heath was very private of who he dated. Nick was the one to brag about his female acquaintances. Heath dated women that one of the Barkleys were aware of. Those females usually only came to light once Heath quit seeing them. "You aren't wanting to marry an underage female?"

The blonde cowboy could see the deep concern for him from his older brother. "No. Not at all.I ain't in trouble neither."

Heath could hear the sigh of relief come from Jarrod as he readied himself to explain. He'd give the lawyer time to come to grips with the question. "Alright, Heath. Why do you ask? For a friend?"

"Something like that." Heath kept on his poker face as he stared at Jarrod. He didn't flinch knowing that Jarrod would be looking for answers in Heath's face. Heath wasn't giving any.

"Well, what has your friend wanting to know about legalities of marriage?" Jarrod was glad Heath showed no signs of distress. That meant it wasn't Nick or Heath in trouble as far as Jarrod could tell.

"Well, a man wants to marry his sister. But they aren't related by blood…." Heath was interrupted by Jarrod.

"It is common practice to marry your adopted sister, Heath." Jarrod settled back into his chair. The lawyer felt thankful he had a good answer for Heath's friend.

Heath shook his head. "Not sure if it is that easy, Jarrod. The couple wanting to marry are thought of as being related by blood even though they aren't. As far as the legal system knows, they are brother and sister by blood. I know it isn't legal for brother and sister to marry. Even first cousins is starting to be looked at as illegal. So in that case, what legal grounds is there to marry? What does this couple have to do?"

Jarrod felt his stomach flip at the description Heath gave. He took in a deep breath pushing back the thoughts of Audra not being related to Heath by blood. The lawyer was sure he was overthinking this.

"One of the two would have to change their name and declare themselves legally not a child of the parents. Of course, the person would have to have some type of proof of their claims." Jarrod watched for any signs of Heath's demeanor changing.

"Oh." Heath stood up. "Reckon that answers the question."

"For a friend?" Jarrod swallowed as he stared at his young brother. Surely, he was overthinking this and playing a scenario in his mind that was impossible.

Heath was almost at the office door when he turned back at Jarrod's words. For a split second, Heath let his guard down. That was all it took for Jarrod to see through Heath's charade. That was all it took for the lawyer to jump over his desk before landing a fist to Heath's chin. Heath felt the blow land causing him to fall on the floor.

Audra had followed Heath into the office due to wanting to go to lunch with him. No one would think anything of her sharing a lunch with Heath. They had shared many lunches when she went dress shopping in the past. The girl wanted alone time with Heath without worry of taking things too far physically. She was naive to some things but not to the fact of wanting Heath in that way. His secret touches had induced her breath to hitch in her lungs. Heath's slight touches on her neck, back or arms always triggered a burning sensation to encase her body. A nice quiet lunch would be just what they needed to keep their cravings at bay but also keep the two from crossing into dangerous territory again. Audra had asked God for forgiveness and planned to not commit sin with Heath again. That was manifesting to be more arduous than she had anticipated.

At the sounds emergiing from inside Jarrod's office, Audra bolted towards the door. She looked at Anna. "I suggest you take your lunch break now, Anna."

The way Audra ordered the words, Anna didn't question what was happening. She chose to get out of there. No use in getting in the middle of the squabble between brothers.

Audra took a deep breath keeping herself in composure before opening the door to Jarrod's office. She watched as Heath picked himself up from the floor. Jarrod looked uncharacteristically like a madman. His posture was much more like Nick's than his own.

Jarrod glanced up at Audra. His voice came in a soft whisper. "Audra?"

Audra bit her bottom lip as she tried to abate the tears. Heath had steadied himself as he rubbed his bruised chin. Heath grinned lopsidedly at Audra.

"You told him?" Audra's voice quivered.

"No." Jarrod declared. "I was only acting on an assumption. But you, my dear sister, just confirmed it."

"Sorry, darlin'. Tried to keep the lawyer in the dark. Let my guard down for a second. Didn't mean to." Heath stepped towards Audra to comfort her.

"Don't get near my sister!" Jarrod bellowed. He once again sounded more like Nick than himself.

"Excuse me." Audra allowed a tear to cascade over her lashes and down her cheek. "I'm an adult. I love him."

"LOVE?!" Jarrod realized his voice was above his accustomed volume. He was losing control of his normal demeanor.

"Yes. Love, Jarrod." Heath spoke up as he placed arm around Audra. "She ain't my sister."

"Well, this is fine situation you've placed the family in." Jarrod composed himself as he stared at the two young people. "Eugene told me that I needed to make sure Mother was calm due to her having a shock because of you." He stared at Heath as he spoke. "I didn't question it as I know Eugene has a tendency to be jealous of you. Did she find out about this...this….infatuation between you two?"

"We think so. She may have saw us kiss." Audra said as Heath escorted her to sit on a sofa along the side of Jarrod's office wall. "But that doesn't change anything. It isn't just Heath involved in this. It is more than an infatuation, Jarrod."

Jarrod rolled his eyes. His mind momentarily went to Heath and Audra kissing. He couldn't fathom that thought so he went on "You're both acting upon the vulnerability due to your parentage. That's all this is."

"It's more than that, Jarrod. I don't expect you to understand." Heath was now standing beside of the sofa near Audra. He held her hand in his.

"OF course I don't understand!" Jarrod's voice went up slightly but he remained in control. "She is my sister. You're my brother."

Audra took a deep breath. She ignored Jarrod long enough to question Heath. "What are you doing here, Heath?"

"I wanted to know how we can legally get married." Heath bent down in front of Audra. "Will ya be mine?"

"This is absurd." Jarrod slumped down in his office chair. "You can't marry your sister, Heath."

"She's not my sister." Heath stared into Audra's eyes. "I love you, Audra. I want to marry you. As I said. Will ya be mine?"

"Yes." Audra loved Heath no matter how wrong it seemed to be.

"Stop this." Jarrod's fist connected with the wood of his desk. "You can't marry legally. According to the documents, you are both Tom Barkley's children. I made Heath legally a Barkley on his 24th birthday. Tom Barkley was declared his legal father not adopted father."

Audra glanced at Heath. He ran his hand across her cheek. It seemed the couple was ignoring the tirade of their older brother. "One of us has to give up the Barkley name. We have to …." Heath swallowed as his voice shook slightly at the fact " ...that person will have to declare Tom Barkley is not their father. I can become a Thomson again. I'll claim..."

"No. I am the one that isn't a Barkley." She glanced at Jarrod. "I am in my heart. I loved father. But I love Heath, Jarrod. I won't have him give up a name he desired all his life. Legally, you can make me a Cartwright. I know Ben Cartwright will sign any paper needed to make it legal."

"No." Jarrod rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Mother can't handle this. She would have to sign the documents too claiming you're not her daughter. She won't understand. Dr. Merar said she isn't as strong as she seems. I will not put her health in jeopardy for this silly notion between you two."

Audra felt a tear roll down her cheek. "I'm sorry you feel that way."

Heath and Audra stood to leave the office. Jarrod spoke with authority. "Do not go to another lawyer. The news of this will spread like wildfire. I refuse to believe you two would jeopardise Mother's health for this selfishness. You're both going to have to get over these so called feelings. That is all there is to it." He turned directly to address Heath. "I expected more from you, Heath."

Heath's jaw clinched. He stared at Jarrod defiantly before rubbing his bruised chin. "I expected more from you too, Jarrod."

 **HISTORICAL NOTE**

 **In the 1800s it was not illegal for adoptive brother/sister to be married. Only blood siblings were illegal to marry.**

 **A/N Because Heath and Audra are confirmed legally to be blood relatives, it would be illegal for them to marry.** **I originally wanted Nick to find out about the relationship between Heath and Audra first. However, as I began writing this update, Jarrod seemed to be the choice to make.**


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 48:Jumping the Broom**

Heath road back to the ranch with Audra. She sniffled once in awhile trying her best not to show she was upset. He pulled Charger to a halt before glancing at Audra. She stopped as well.

"Climb down here, little lady." Heath dismounted Charger as he spoke. He helped Audra from her horse before pulling her into an embrace. "I love you. I'll figure it out."

"Jarrod is right about this causing Mother pain. Look at how he reacted. Jarrod is the most level headed of us. He weighs consequences, seeks for justice, listens to reason. IF he reacted to the news of us this way, what will Mother and Nick do?" Audra wrapped her arms around Heath tightly. "I love you so much. What can we do?"

Heath raked his fingers through Audra's hair. He pulled her face up to look at him. "I love you too. I have an idea. One that may not be what society thinks is best. But one God may agree to. Then when Mother is strong, we will tell her that we want your name changed for a marriage to me."

"I'll do anything to be with you, Heath." Audra's tongued jutted out to wet her lips.

Heath moaned at the action before diving into a much wanted and needed kiss. Both were breathless by the time the kissing was over.

Heath leaned his forehead against Audra's forehead. His breath teased her face as he spoke in a slightly lustful whisper. "Go find yourself the prettiest dress you can find. Bring it and meet me at the old line shack on the West side of the ranch around 8 tomorrow morning. Do you know where I mean?"

"Yes." Audra ran her hand across Heath's chest. She fiddled with the buttons on his shirt. She stopped her actions when she saw Heath's eyes shut tightly. She realized he was fighting the desire building in him. She stepped back from the embrace. "I guess we better stop before we get carried away."

"No more gettin' carried away. Tomorrow we'll be married." Heath pulled Audra into another heated kiss before reluctantly relinquishing her.

Audra didn't know what Heath had in mind. However, she knew she trusted him. Therefore, she mounted her black mare and headed towards Stockon. She would buy the most beautiful dress she could on such short notice.

Heath road quickly to the ranch. He dismounted Charger leaving him in Ciego's care. Heath practically raced to the kitchen. There he found Silas preparing things for dinner for that evening.

"Silas, I need to talk to you." Heath pushed back his hat from his head. "I need your help."

The next morning, Audra was relieved that her mother was heading to visit widow Greene again. Nick was working on the winery stock. Jarrod was working on a case and had left for Stockton. This made way for Audra to go to Heath without questions.

At dinner the night before, Jarrod had acted like nothing happened between Audra, Heath and him. The family never mentioned the slight bruising on Heath's chin. Heath was a working cowboy. Thus, scrapes and bruises were a common factor. Audra and Heath figured Jarrod hadn't taken them seriously. Their big brother certainly thought this was a passing fancy for the two blondes. He had no clue how far the relationship between Heath and Audra had progressed. Therefore, Jarrod assumed they would take his advice and be done with it. It was as if Jarrod thought Audra had a new toy to just put away and tire of it. As far as Heath, the cowboy always caved to family requests. Jarrod figured this would be the same.

Audra rode her mare gently so she wouldn't wrinkle her new dress, which was bundled safely in a package behind her. The dress was made of a soft silky material of the palest blue color. She remembered how Heath had mentioned she looked good in blue before. The dress was inlaid with with rosebuds around the slightly plunging neckline. The rosebuds were extremely small and intricate in detail.

Audra knew Heath had been gone late last night after dinner. She didn't know what time he had arrived back or where he had gone. Therefore, when she arrived at the line shack, she was surprised no one but Heath was there. She expected some one with authority to change her name.

"Keep mounted, Darlin'." Heath informed her. "We're riding to Strawberry."

On the long ride to Stawberry, they spoke of anything but the plans Heath had made. Audra had no idea what was in Heath's head. Again, she trusted him completely.

Once they arrived in Strawberry, her questions were answered. Audra was shocked to see Silas there along with his preacher. A small black woman, Audra knew had to be Hannah, smiled broadly at Audra as Heath helped her down from her mount.

"Is this your girl, Heath?" Hannah said in an almost child like voice. "She pretty. She so pretty."

"Yes. Hannah, this is Audra. She will be my wife today." Heath smiled as he watched Audra embrace Hannah. He heard Audra's whisper.

"Thank you for helping raise such a fine man. I love Heath so much." Audra stated as she squeezed Hannah to her.

"That's all that matters. My boy be loved. Heath be fine." Hannah patted Audra's hand when Audra released her. "I made a fine cake for your wedding. Just like I made for Ms. Leah when she married that no good…" Hannah stopped and laughed at herself. "But that be in the past. I make a cake for you and my Heath. That be the future. Oh what a fine and happy future for my boy Heath."

It wasn't long before Audra had changed into her beautiful dress and fixed her hair. Her hair hung in loose tendrils around her angelic face. She glanced outside to see Heath pacing nervously while Silas shook his head at Heath. She saw Silas laugh as he whispered something to the preacher. Audra turned around to look at Hannah, who had helped her ready herself.

"Hannah, would you do me a favor? Take me to Heath's mother's grave and introduce me to Heath's mother." Audra took the older woman's hand. "I need to speak to her before I marry her son."

"Miss Leah sure would like that, Miss Audra." Hannah stated as she lead Audra away to Heath's mother's grave.

Audra placed a flower, that was pulled from the bouquet ,that Hannah had made for the wedding, on Leah's grave. She chewed her bottom lip as she thought of the woman that raised and loved Heath. She read the dates on the tombstone. Audra realized how very young Leah was when she died. She also realized how very young she was when Tom, who was twice Leah's age, had been with Leah. She slowly traced Leah's name on the stone.

"I love your son, Ms. Thomson. I love him more than anything in this whole world. I must admit. I never understood how you could've not told father of him. Or how you even were with father without marriage until I fell in love with Heath. It was so easy to give my everything to Heath. I think that is how it was with you and fath...Tom Barkley." Tom Barkley would always be Audra's father in her heart. But here with Leah, he had to Heath's father first.

"Heath is so much like him in many ways. Yet, he is so very different too. I can't explain what I mean but I'm sure you know. I know how easy Heath is to love. I know that he made your world worth living because he makes mine worth it too. I was at times in life so superficial, always seeking adventure, wanting something more of life not even sure what that was. I was searching for my place in the family. I guess searching for myself of who I was. I don't look anymore. I found all I want and am in Heath." Audra wiped a tear from her cheek. "I promise to take care of him. I know he was first in your life. I vow to make him first in mine above the others in my family. If we have to leave the Barkleys, so be it. As long as Heath is part of my life, I will be happy."

Audra stood to leave but hesitated. She smiled as she added. "I only hope when I have his children I can be the kind of mother you were to Heath and Victoria Barkley is to me. I can ask for no greater wish. Please know, Heath is so loved. So very loved."

Not long after she arrived back at the house, Heath's face blushed red when he saw her. He got more embarrassed when he heard Silas chuckling at Heath's reaction. "Miss Audra sure is a beautiful lady, Heath. You are a very blessed man."

"I am." Heath could barely get the words out as joyful tears laced his voice.

The ceremony was far from what anyone would expect for Audra Barkley. The preacher asked simply. "Will you take this woman as your wife?" And "Will you take this man as your husband?"

Both Heath and Audra answered with a zealous " yes".

Heath then pulled out a necklace with a rough round metal ring dangling from it. The ring was too small for an adult finger.

Heath's hands shook as he undid the clasp. He looked deeply in Audra's eyes as he explained the significance of the small battered ring.

"When I was around eight years old, I found out what the word bastard meant. I knew Mama was called awful names because of me being her bastard." Audra started to protest the name but Heath put a finger on her lip to hush her. "I only knew that Mama needed to be married to be known as a the good woman she was. So, I hatched me a plan. I worked in the livery by then. The livery owner let me work on tack as well as work with horses. I had to replace some metal on one of the customer's saddles. I took the old metal and molded it into this ring. I know it looks a might rough. But to an eight year old boy, it was a wedding band. I marched home that night so proud of my ring. I handed it to my Mama and asked her to marry me. I thought that would solve people from hurting her. Well, she hugged me so tight before she told me that little boys can't marry their Mamas. But she added soothing words so I wouldn't be upset. She said that I was her little prince. Someday I'd find my own princess to marry. She put this ring up in a box she called her special treasure box. She said that whoever my princess was…" He felt tears burn his eyes. "...that there was no way the princess would have a finer ring than this one. You are my princess, Audra. You are more than any fantasy from a fairy tale could be. I love you."

Heath then slipped the necklace around Audra's neck. She allowed her own tears to fall as she allowed the small metal ring to play in her fingers. Audra agreed with Leah. There was no finer ring than this one.

Silas patted Heath on the back. Hannah embraced both Heath and Audra. The preacher declared them husband and wife. Then Silas laid a broom down. Audra and Heath both laughed loudly as,hand in hand, they jumped the broom.

 **Historical note: Jumping the broom has become one of the most popular African traditions at weddings-traditional and African-centered. History tells us that the ancestral roots of this ritual began deep in the heart of Africa. It's original purpose and significance has been lost over the years because of the association with slavery.**

 **Most marriages between enslaved blacks were not legally recognized during American slavery, as in law marriage was held to be a civil contract, and civil contracts required the consent of free persons. In the absence of any legal recognition, the slave community developed its own methods of distinguishing between committed and casual ceremonial jumping of the broom served as an open declaration of settling down in a marriage relationship. Jumping the broom was always done before witnesses as a public ceremonial announcement that a couple chose to become as close to married as was then allowed.**


	49. Chapter 49

**_Chapter 49: Wedding Bliss_**

The old line shack on the west end of the Barkley ranch made for a rather plain honeymoon location compared to any luxurious hotel that would be befitting a Barkley. That didn't deter Heath from trying his best to make it feel special with wild flowers and various candles. He had cleaned the shack the night before and changed the linens. Heath built a small fire in the fireplace to add to the romantic ambiance which he was trying to create. Heath felt it was too less for his beautiful bride. Audra thought it perfect because all she really wanted was Heath.

Once again, Audra was timid as they made love. Heath treated her like a special treasure allowing her naivety to factor into how he treated Audra as his lover. The biggest difference was the fact Audra never cried and neither regretted their actions. They felt as husband and wife before God. Both were determined the marriage would be made legal when Victoria felt stronger. They would face the family with their intentions as soon as possible. If the family protested, as they feared, Audra and Heath agreed to head to the Cartwrights.

On the Ponderosa, Heath and Audra would live as the Thomsons even though they felt their name was Mr. and Mrs. Barkley. It would be far less confusing for the ranch hands on the Ponderosa as Heath was already known as Thomson.

They would live in a cabin for Ben's foreman. Heath had already spoken to Joe and Hoss about a position on the ranch. He was told he would have to be a foreman because he was too good to be a regular hand. Candy expressed how he would be pleased to have another foreman help with the breaking of wild horses. Candy was unmarried and preferred the camaraderie in the bunkhouse instead of the house designated for the foreman. Heath would be in charge of a horse part of the ranch for Ben. Heath was prepared for the Barkleys to run him off when they found out about Audra and himself. He never expected Audra to become his wife and follow him there. Now, it was unthinkable leaving one another behind.

Heath pondered these things as he held his sleeping bride in his arms. The flames of the fire danced upon the walls around them luring him into a restful sleep as well. Heath felt content. He was more content than he could remember feeling in his life.

Heath woke after an hour of napping. He ran his hand over Audra's silky hair before sliding off from under her body. He peered down at the reason for living now.

Audra's hair was splayed across the white pillow causing Heath to gulp at her beauty. Everything about Audra spoke of her perfection to him. She was his angel to protect, to provide for but mostly to love.

Audra woke to find Heath staring at her as he dressed. She gifted Heath with a coy smile as she pulled the white sheet up to cover her exposed body. Heath winked at her before he sat on the side of the bed. He ran his hand down her bare arm.

"I guess we better head back to the ranch. It's almost dinner time." Heath jutted out his tongue to wet his dry lips. "I bet you're famished."

"I am." Audra admitted. "I didn't eat much of the wedding cake. I was so nervous about…" Audra halted her words allowing her shyness to cause her cheeks to blush.

"Me neither." Heath stood up. "Do you need help getting dressed?" Heath teased. "Because I'd be obligated to do so as your husband."

Audra chuckled before she released a slow sigh. "I think I can manage. Although, I am mighty obliged Mr. Barkley."

"Just offerin' to do my husbandly duty, Mrs. Barkley." Heath patted Audra's thigh before heading towards the door. "I'll saddle our mounts. I love you."

"I love you too." Audra called after him. "Husband." She giggled as she slung herself back on the bed. Audra kicked her legs with a squeal. "I'm married! I'm married to Heath Barkley!"

Heath smiled broadly at hearing Audra's joyful proclamation. He knew the bliss wouldn't last when they had to face their family. Now, they would enjoy basking in the fact they were husband wife.

Victoria, Jarrod, and Nick looked strangely at the dinner set before them by Silas. He was humming happily as he put out each entree. Heath and Audra both looked surprised but did their best to hide it from the family.

Silas had made a roasted duck and potato salad. Heath's favorite was duck. Audra's favorite was Silas's potato salad. The other foods on the table were perfect for a wedding feast. Rice pudding, green beans baked with ham, and a plethora of food items.

Nick stared at the food sat on the table. He scratched his chin. "Did I miss something? Did I miss Heath's birthday?"

Silas continued to hum happily as he answered. "This is the day the Lord has made. It is a happy day. That is all there is to it. Yes. Indeed. A happy day."

Heath secretly whispered a thank you knowing Silas had worked hard to get them a wedding feast. Audra's eyes watered when Silas served pieces of Hannah's wedding cake to the family on fine Barkley china.

Victoria and Jarrod studied the dessert of ice cream and cake. Jarrod frowned slightly as he thought the feast was too much like a wedding dinner. However, he knew that was impossible as no one could be married at the table. Especially, the two blondes due to the legality of it all.

Victoria would try to question Silas later. After all, the man couldn't lie to her if she directly asked. Victoria figured it was as simple as a friend of Silas's marrying on that day. She knew Silas had said he needed to spend the earlier part of the day with his pastor. Victoria also knew that Silas had prepared the dinner the night before only warming it for tonight's feast.

She had guessed the ice cream and cake were also from the previous day. Victoria chose to enjoy the dinner and the gaiety it was bringing her children. Jarrod seemed to be the only one to feel ill at ease as the dinner was placed before the family.

The conversation began of the day's events. Nick was the first to speak up. "Did you get that old line shack fixed you insisted on?"

"Yep." Heath stated as he discreetly winked at Audra, who blushed a crimson color.

"How is Mrs. Greene, Mother?" Audra steered the conversation away from the line shack. She was sure she was blushing just thinking of their secret honeymoon cottage.

The conversation went on from there about the Greenes which continued with the day's mundane events as Victoria asked Jarrod about his case. Jarrod's mood lightened as he became entangled in telling of the progress of his client's case.

After dinner, Heath and Audra snuck outside to walk in Victoria's garden. Audra wanted so badly to lean into her husband's arms. However, she resisted knowing it wasn't good to be showing Heath a lot of attention in case their mother was watching.

"Today was more than perfect, Heath." Audra sighed as she sat down on the bench under a small cherry tree. Heath sat down next to her.

"Yeah. I wish I could hold you all night. You're my wife. I should get to hold you at night. We should get to share a marriage bed." Heath grasped Audra's hand in his. "I think we should ask Dr. Merar how much Mother can take. How strong she is now. "

"I agree." Audra sighed as she glanced around making sure no one could see. She put her head on Heath's shoulders. "I love being Mrs. Heath Thomson Barkley."

"I love you being Mrs. Heath Thomson Barkley." Heath lifted her face to allow his lips to kiss hers.

The day was full of wedding bliss. Both wanted to remain in this dream forever. They both feared that the other Barkleys would never allow the wedding day to be a blissful event if they knew of it.


	50. Chapter 50

**_A/N I apologize for the long delay in updates. I will try to get busy and finish up this story. I have the ending but trying to fill in for it to make sense. Real life has thrown some curve balls my way but God is in complete control. Once again, sorry for the delay._**

 ** _Chapter 50: Jarrod's Pappy Understanding_**

Jarrod Barkley was always the family member who kept the cool head. He reasoned through things to make sure that justice was served. That reasoning was also used with concerns of his family. That was why he was called Pappy from all his siblings even a brother only five years his junior. The only exception to this was Heath, the half brother. Jarrod wasn't sure Pappy was suited for Heath. The man had practically raised himself from a very early age. Therefore, Jarrod knew Heath would never see him as Pappy. However, Jarrod loved his younger brother dearly. More than even he had expected.

Wanting to solve the problem of his blonde siblings, Jarrod had thought he had the perfect solution for Heath's infatuation with Audra. Being Pappy, he was really trying to help. He was trying to be Pappy and make things best for the whole family. Jarrod didn't foresee what would happen with his younger brother.

"Maria is back in town." Nick winked over at Jarrod as the three brothers gathered around the billiard table. "She was asking about you, Heath."

Jarrod was grateful that Nick had ran into Maria. This way it was Nick informing Heath of the lovely Montero daughter being back on the Montero Ranch. Not himself. Jarrod had ran into Don Montero in San Francisco. The Don had agreed that Maria was not herself since giving up Heath. Therefore, Jarrod suggested that Maria be allowed to have a courtship with Heath. Don Montero reluctantly agreed. It was so much better to have a happy daughter than a sulking one even if the blood line would be ruined.

Jarrod kept his ears open as Nick addressed Heath. He wanted his brother to react in the way he was sure Heath would. Heath continued to clean the rifle in his hands.

He answered in a monotone voice. "Don't figure why Maria would want to see me."

"Of course you know why!" Nick bellowed. "She still has a thing for you, boy! You need to go find out!"

Jarrod knew that to be true. He had heard with his own ears the glee in Maria's voice when her father agreed to allow Maria to have a courtship with Heath. Jarrod eagerly awaited for Heath's reaction.

Heath didn't even glance up as he spoke. "Not really interested in findin' out."

"What?" Jarrod's question slipped out slowly.

"I don't love Maria. I reckon I cared for her but it wasn't love." Heath still cleaned the rifle showing no sign of interest in the conversation. "Wouldn't want to lead her on to think there is more to it."

"But..but…" Nick stammered. Jarrod was glad Nick was doing his job for him. What was his blonde haired brother thinking? "You moped around for a month over her."

Heath finally looked up. "No. I moped around for a month feeling sorry for myself over the whole being Tom Barkley's bastard as I did then. I don't any more. I know I'm as much Barkley as the rest of ya. But then I had a lot of doubt in myself worth. Maria was cared for. I'll admit. But not true love. I know that for sure now. That's all there is to it."

Nick figured Heath was just being stubborn and prideful. "Well, since you don't care about her, I think I may just pay Montero a visit. Maybe I will ask to court her."

Nick winked Jarrod's way as he tried to bait his younger brother. Both hoped that would get a different reaction from Heath. Nick thought he'd push Heath towards Maria. He wanted his younger brother happy. Jarrod hoped the same but his reason was to get Heath away from Audra.

"Don Montero did seem to take a cotton to you." Heath stood up and placed the gun in the gun cabinet. "Might be real nice coupling up with her for you, Nick. She's a mighty fine gal."

"Best gal around." Nick tried again.

"Well, I wouldn't say that." Heath smiled slightly. "I got to get some work done. But, Nick, if you're serious about Maria, I assure you that I don't love her. You'd be a real fine pick for her."

With those words, Heath exited the gunroom as Audra and Victoria entered. Audra felt her body quiver as Heath slightly ran his fingers secretively down her spine before continuing to exit the room.

"What is the topic of conversation today, Jarrod?" Victoria settled on the settee as she handed Audra her embroidery tools. Picking up her own supplies, she glanced at her sons. "You both look dumbfounded."

"We are." Nick answered for Jarrod. "We just told Heath that Maria is back in town. She is very much interested in making amends with Heath. Figured he'd be right down happy to know it. Didn't seem to care at all. Matter of fact, he told me to court her."

Victoria placed down her embroidery as she looked puzzled at Nick. She clicked her tongue on the roof of her mouth before speaking. "You know how Heath is. He is very prideful. She hurt his pride. I'm sure once he sees Maria, Heath will allow his feelings to surface once more." Nick and Victoria continued talking about Don Montero's change of heart concerning Heath.

Jarrod was hoping and praying his mother was correct in her assumptions. He took a fleeting look at his lovely sister. The sadness etched on her face hurt him for her. However, he believed both Heath and Audra needed to open their eyes. After all, he didn't figure Audra would be sad long. Jarrod had also been playing Pappy for her. In only three days, Scott Breckenridge was to show up and declare his love for Audra.

At the same party where the Monteros were, Scott Breckenridge attended. After Scott had one too many drinks, Jarrod helped the man back to his suite. It was in a drunken confession that Scott informed Jarrod of his love for Audra. The man claimed that not asking Audra's hand in marriage was the worst mistake in his life. Therefore, being Pappy, Jarrod suggested he tell Audra that in person.

Jarrod's thoughts were interrupted by his mother's words. A smile formed on his face with Victoria asked Audra to help her plan a small party in honor of Maria. They would be celebrating her return to the valley.

"That way, Heath can see her without looking like he is running to her." Victoria smiled wistfully. "Of course, I'll make sure it is okay with Don Montero but I'm sure it will be after what Nick said."

"That is a great idea, lovely Lady." Jarrod tried to hide the relief he was feeling.

" Aren't you excited, Audra?" Victoria noticed Audra's far away look.

Audra swallowed before adding a fake smile to her face. "Of course, Mother. I love planning parties."


	51. Chapter 51

**_A/N Because I have been such a long time in updates, someone suggested that I give a summary of my stories to allow readers to remember previous parts of the story. Here is a summary of events thus far._**

Heath and Audra found out through their Aunt Rose Barkley that Heath was known about by one Barkley from his early childhood. That was Aunt Rose. They also found out Audra was switched with at birth with another baby. Tom and Victoria had a infant die the same day Audra was born. Audra's real mother was Victoria's indentical twin, who begged Victoria to raise her daughter. Soon after Audra's biological mother died. Audra's father was never told of the switch. He was Ben Cartwright. The timeline doesn't go with Bonanza at all but Big Valley. I only used the Cartwrights as special guests because Audra deserved a family some readers may know.

Due to the blondes feeling vulnerability and a common ground of insecurity of family, Audra and Heath have found themselves in an intimate relationship. Victoria Barkley suffered a stroke due to seeing the two kiss. She doesn't remember the kiss. (Is there more to it?) After going to Jarrod to inquire about marrying Audra, Jarrod made it in no uncertain terms that he would not help the two marry. To take up for Jarrod, he can't wrap his mind around a relationship as they are both brother/sister to him and he also knows this could be very detrimental to Victoria's health. Jarrod had no clue how far the relationship has went or he would definitely see things differently. With help from Silas, Audra and Heath married in the style slaves used to marry rather than legally. They can not marry legally due to both being claimed as Tom Barkley's children.

Jarrod wants only what is best for his family. Therefore, thinking that the blondes are only acting out in vulnerability, he decides to help his siblings along by bringing two people from their past back into their lives. Maria Montero and Scott Breckenridge.

Now…...

Chapter 51: The Dinner Party

Audra watched as Maria practically draped herself all over Heath. Audra couldn't deny Maria's beauty. The girl was stunning as always. Maria wore the most expensive and modern fashion in attire. Her personality matched her looks.

Audra couldn't deny Maria's love for Heath twinkled in Maria's eyes. What Audra couldn't figure out was how Heath felt about Maria. Audra began to doubt herself when it concerned Heath. Had she seduced the blonde cowboy while both were vulnerable? Had she seduced Heath unwittingly with her naivety?

Heath desperately wanted to get away from Maria. He didn't want the girl hurt but he wasn't interested. He was a married man and his wife was who he intended of spending the night with. It had been two and a half weeks since Maria had arrived into town. Audra had been busy with her mother planning the dinner party. Therefore, it had been two and a half weeks since Heath was alone with his new bride. Heath didn't like the fact he didn't share a marriage bed with Audra. He liked it even less that they hadn't had time to sneak off alone for intimacy.

The only thing that made matters worse was that Scott Breckenridge had arrived in Stockton approximately a week ago. Heath wasn't sure what the man wanted but he had a gnawing feeling it involved his beautiful wife.

Both Heath and Audra were feeling doubts due to the secret of their marriage. If it was up to them both, they would be screaming from the rooftops of their love and their marriage.

Heath's thoughts were broke when Maria addressed him. "Walk me to the porch, Heath. We need to talk."

Heath took a deep breath as he looped Maria's arm in his. Audra saw Maria and Heath retreat to the outside. Her heart jumped in her chest at the sight. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She knew not to doubt Heath's love. She knew he was sincere in his feelings. However, that didn't stop the jealousy that Maria was with her husband while Audra had to pretend not to love the man.

Maria leaned against the closet white column as Heath Stood adjacent her. She faced him. Watching him, Maria saw the way Heath stared at his boots. He didn't look at her once in the eyes.

"I still love you, Heath Barkley." Maria stated in a soft tone.

"Maria…" Heath started to speak but Maria interrupted.

"Heath…" Maria's voice cracked with unshed tears. "Let me finish. I told you to love again. I guess deep down I hoped you wouldn't. But I can tell you are uncomfortable around me. At first, I thought you feared I'd hurt you again. That I'd choose my father if he made me choose. I know father wants me happy. He would never make me choose now." Maria held up her hand when Heath started to speak again. "Please let me finish. I realize now that there is something more. You don't love me. You don't even want to try again. There is someone else. Isn't there?"

Heath looked up at Maria. He took a deep breath before answering. "Yes."

"You are deeply in love with her. More than you ever were with me." Maria felt a tear trickle down her cheek. "She is very lucky."

"No, Maria. I am." Heath half smiled. "I never intended to hurt you. Matter of fact, I never intended to fall in love with her. This caught her and me by surprise. But I do love her more than anything."

Maria smiled sweetly as she reached to squeeze Heath's hand. "Is this a secret relationship? Because Nick and Jarrod ,as well as Mrs. Barkley, seem to think we will be courting again."

"It's complicated." Heath ran his hand behind his neck nervously.

At those words, Audra came out to the porch. _No woman was going to be alone with her handsome husband. She didn't care how much trouble it caused the family at the moment._

"Heath, Maria, here you both are." Audra feigned innocence. "The guest of honor missing isn't good for a party."

Heath chuckled at his beautiful wife. _She sure was a feisty thing. Gosh. He missed being with her._

"I guess I'll make my appearances. Thanks for the honestly, Heath." Maria watched as Heath nodded and headed into the large mansion.

Maria was caught by surprise when Audra touched her arm. Audra's eyes blinked slightly as she spoke with obvious intent.

"There is a family secret, Maria." Audra straightened her shoulders as she inhaled deeply. She decided to take the plunge with a few simple words. "I was adopted by the Barkleys."

With those words, Audra left Maria dumbfounded on the porch. Maria shook her head at the implications of Audra's statement. Maria went in the house searching out Heath.

She walked up to Heath as she whispered. "Audra is a very beautiful woman. I'm sure you both will be very happy. Good luck with this family accepting this relationship. I don't see this being as easily accepted as my father accepted ours. And we both know how that went."

Heath turned to stare at Maria. He knew Maria felt scorned by the fact it was Audra. If it was anyone else, he was sure Maria would accept it. However, it being Audra made Maria feel dejected for no reason by Heath. Heath didn't question what Audra had told Maria. However, something allowed Maria the knowledge of the love of his life.

"There is a difference, Maria." Heath glanced up to stare at Audra across the room. She was charming the guests as she made her way around the room. "Audra would choose me over family as I would her."


	52. Chapter 52

_**Chapter 52: True Love?**_

Anger flashed through Heath's eyes as he watched Scott Breckenridge flirting with Audra. The man had made his intentions clear when he arrived the day before. He road in on a magnificent stallion, which matched Scott's own appearance of grandeur. Scott pleaded to talk to the family, including Heath in the list of family. He had made his case clear on his realization that he had fallen deeply in love with Audra Barkley. The man said all the right words. He acted all the right ways. He looked all the right too.

Heath had seen the look in Victoria's eyes at how Scott was a changed man. Jarrod was happy to hear his old friend become a new man due to the beautiful Barkley girl. Nick wasn't impressed but he wasn't opposed either. Eugene wasn't there to offer an opinion. All that didn't matter much to Heath until he saw the gleam in Audra's eyes at Scott's words. Heath hated the gnawing jealousy that clawed at his heart when he saw that look.

He thought his lungs were going to collapse when Scott took Audra's hand and asked her to take a walk. Audra grinned widely accepting Scott's hand. Then Heath watched Audra walk away with Scott to the garden. Without giving much thought to who was around, Heath punched the wall angrily causing no damage to the expensive wood but plenty to his knuckles.

"Heath Barkley!" Victoria exclaimed as she wondered what got into her blonde son. She scurried to Heath to check out his hand.

Blood pooled around the broken skin of his knuckles. Victoria shook her head as she watched her son's chest heaving with every deep breath he took. Jarrod furrowed his eyebrows wondering what was happening. Surely Heath had realized Audra would be over their silly infatuation by now?

Nick knew that look from Heath. He had seen it before. Heath was angry. The kind of angry that Nick knew to step away from. He had seen the blonde take down two men without help when that look appeared. Then, those men had said a derogatory remark about Heath's mother. Nick wondered what had caused the sudden seething in Heath now.

Heath jerked his hand away from Victoria. She looked up at him shocked at his actions. "Heath?"

Taking a couple of breaths to calm himself, he stated lowly to make up for his intense action. "I'm fine."

Heath marched out before anything else was said. Nick ran his hand over the back of his neck. "Well, Charger needs to have a good run anyway."

Looking away from the area in which Heath departed, Jarrod questioned. "Seems our young brother is a little agitated."

"Yep." Nick shrugged. "He'll race his horse to get rid of the anger. It's his way."

"I don't understand. What brought this on?" Victoria sat down with a worried look on her face. She doubted she'd ever figure out where and when Heath's sudden bursts of anger came from.

"Obviously, our dear brother doesn't want our dear sister near Mr. Breckenridge." Jarrod supposed Heath didn't think Scott was earnest of his words to Audra. Or Heath was still harboring unrealistic feelings for Audra.

"Scott seemed sincere in his words. Why come back to state his intentions unless he meant his words? There is no profit in them." Victoria sighed out. She hoped there wasn't going to be trouble on the horizon. Heath seemed very angry. Too angry. "Heath is just being over protective."

"Heath is a good judge of character. He may see a fox in the hen house. I'll go with Heath over any man." Nick stated before he placed his hat on his head. "I guess I'll head back to work. Heath seems madder than a wet hornet. That means he'll be out there working himself to the bone after he's done with running Charger. Some days it is hard to keep up with that boy."

Jarrod took out a cigar as he watched Nick exit quickly."Like that's a surprise."

Victoria looked up puzzled. "What is that, Dear?"

"Nick siding with Heath." Jarrod chuckled slightly. "Eugene pointed out the obvious when he was here. Those two are thicker than thieves as Heath would say. Eugene was a little jealous."

"Is he okay with them now?" Victoria switched her concern from Heath to Eugene. She hated the fact she rarely saw the boy. Sometimes, it felt as if the family forgot he existed.

"Eugene wrote me a letter. He understands Heath's and Nick's bond after..." Jarrod swallowed hard. His words were not with their usual charm of a few minutes ago.

"After the Mexican prison camp." Victoria finished Jarrod's thought. "They were close before but now they are like joined souls. Yes. Yes. That's it. I've noticed that Audra is also somewhat different around Heath too. It is as if she fears someday he won't return or something. I often spot them whispering to one another."

Jarrod took a deep inhale of his cigar. He prayed his mother was well enough to handle it if she discovered Heath's and Audra's feelings for one another. However, the son in him wouldn't take a chance of revealing that knowledge. Besides, Jarrod was sure Audra was realizing the ignorance of being with Heath in any other capacity than a brother.

Jarrod added thoughtfully. "I suppose she lets him know of her fears and he encourages her otherwise."

"All of our lives changed with Heath and even more so after his close brush with death." Victoria tried to shake away the thought of seeing her son lying there looking so lost for days after being in that place. She was sure memories of Carterson were haunting him as well.

Taking the conversation back to the original theme, Jarrod sighed out. "That being said, I think Heath is being extra cautious of our dear little sister's new love interest."

"I'm sure that's it." Victoria stood and offered her arm to her oldest child. "Escort your mother towards the garden. We may as well follow Heath's example in this matter. It is better to be safe for Audra's sake."

Victoria and Jarrod stayed far enough away from Scott and Audra as to not to feel like spies. However, as they rounded the corner of the garden, they were in very close proximity of the couple. Audra and Scott couldn't see them. Therefore, their conversation was overheard without hindrance of knowing there were others listening.

Scott took Audra's hands in his. He smiled genuinely as he held her hands. He stooped to one knee staring up at Audra with earnest love. Victoria wanted to run from the scene as to not be in on their private moment. However, doing so would only alert the two they were being watched. Jarrod nor Victoria wanted to interrupt the atmosphere of the magic moment.

"Scott, don't." Audra took a deep breath.

She knew she was guilty of flirting with Scott for the last few hours. Her reasons were more selfish than she cared to admit. She wanted to make Heath feel just a little of the jealousy that plagued her over Maria as well as the other females, who were constantly reminding Audra that Heath was well adored. She didn't mean to lead Scott on. Audra didn't realize the man was using sincere words rather than his usual charm.

"Audra, I made a mistake before. I love you. I didn't realize how empty my life would be without you. Say you will be my wife." Scott pulled a large diamond ring from his pocket.

Subconsciously, Audra fiddled with the chain that held the crude metal ring given to her by Heath. "I'm sorry, Scott. I don't love you."

Scott stood up allowing his shoulder's to droop. "I don't understand, Audra. I thought we were getting back to how it was."

"No." Audra drew in a deep breath. "I wasn't in love with you then either. I was a young girl infatuated with a man I wanted to prove I could attain."

"You have proven that." Scott stated as he felt his heart being wrenched.

Audra shook her head. "I don't want to prove anything, Scott. I know what true love is. Perhaps, you do love me with true love. However, I don't feel the same. True love has not escaped me. However, that love is for someone else."

Victoria felt confusion wrap around her. Jarrod placed his hands on his mother's shoulders as he too questioned if Heath was who Audra was speaking of. A sudden awareness caught Jarrod by surprise. Audra and Heath were in love. True love.

"I see. So there is some lucky young man, who has stolen your heart." Scott shook his head in defeat. "I guess it wasn't true love if you could change to another so fast."

Audra felt for the man. However, she held her ground. "He is a great man. I am the one that is lucky or more so blessed. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. Perhaps, I have been childish in my flirting with you. No. Not perhaps. I have been childish. I wanted him jealous."

"Jealous?" Scott chortled as he placed the ring back in his vest pocket. "Two questions. Why make him jealous and did it work?"

Audra shrugged as a giggled escaped her own lips. "Why is easy. He has a lot of female admirers that have made me want to scratch their eyes out. The second answer is I doubt he is jealous."

"Confident man. I guess he would have to be to be yours." Scott stepped up. He kissed Audra without her knowing it was coming. He stepped back before she could protest. "One last kiss from you."

Audra nodded her head as she headed out of the garden with Scott tailing behind her. Victoria was relieved although curious that Audra had chosen what was best for her. Jarrod feared he had under estimated the feelings between Heath and Audra. First Heath made it plain he longer was interested in Maria. Now Audra turned down a proposal from a very eligible bachelor.

None were aware that Heath was on a hill that overlooked the garden. From his vantage point, it looked as if Audra had accepted a proposal from Scott Breckenridge.

His heart broke as his jealousy escalated.

 **A/N. Thank you all for reviews and responses. the next chapter will contain sexual content. It is still rated T material and not mature.**


	53. Chapter 53

_Chapter 53: Father's Portrait_

Heath stayed out way past the time he knew his family would retire for bed. He made sure to tell Silas to not wait for him for supper or dinner. Whatever the Barkley's called it. Heath wasn't about to hear all of the family celebrating and congratulating Audra on having such a perfect man for her fiancé. After all, Scott Breckenridge was extremely wealthy. He was also highly educated. His speaking showed as much. Jarrod had taken to the man as an equal in intelligence. Heath could never match up to that to any woman. No less someone as fine as Audra.

Scott Breckenridge could offer Audra the world. All Heath could offer her was an illegal marriage and part ownership in a ranch, which she already owned. The marriage was real to him but perhaps it wasn't to Audra. Heath realized there wasn't a thing that he could give Audra Barkley but his love. Scott could give that as easily. However, Heath wondered if Scott could ever give as much love to Audra as he held himself. It seemed impossible. Heath would give up all even his name, which he took pride in, for Audra. Scott would never have to.

He wondered if Audra would reveal to Scott that she wasn't pure now. Heath hated that thought fleeted through his mind. After all, he was the man that took her innocence when she probably was feeling too vulnerable to think straight. Heath supposed the other times Audra and he had shared in intimacy was due to her feeling overwhelmed at the pleasure he could give her. She was a young woman who had never been with a man. She had barely kissed a man as far as the real kissing like Heath had given her. Heath knew he could make a woman desire and feel pleasure that would taunt them into submission. He'd done it before. He'd been with women since he was fourteen years old. Most of those women were older by at least five years. Prostitutes didn't harm a boy like his mama warned. Or did they? Heath wasn't so sure anymore.

Heath slid off Charger as he thought of all those women in his past. As he curried his horse, he couldn't help but allow the thoughts to continue. Not one woman, who he laid with, did he love. Liberty was close to innocent as Audra. However, at fifteen, Liberty had given herself to a rich young man promising her a future. He figured that was why it was so easy to give herself to Heath at sixteen. He cared for the girl but didn't really love her intensely like he did Audra. He thought he did. However, Heath realized his marriage proposal to Libby was more out of fearing never finding love due to his parentage. A few others played in his thoughts. He didn't remember the names of them all. The most fiery was Lupe. She was far from love. That was more of an adventure.

Heath didn't care to think of his first time with a woman. It was the first time he'd actually seen his demure mother fight as in physically. Heath remembered his Aunt Rachel hiding her giggling as his mother escorted him in the house. It was the only time Heath wasn't the one in the family wearing the black eye. Leah held her head high as she sported the swollen eye. Her only words to Rachel was a coy "You should see the way that Jezebel looks if you think I look bad."

His thoughts noted that he was also taught by that first woman how to make sure no baby was left behind. He had to admit, he was thankful for that lesson. He'd never leave a child fatherless as he had been. Even with Audra, he'd taken precautions taught to him. Heath shook his head out of those thoughts. Those thoughts cheapened what he felt when he made love to Audra the times he had. Those experiiences made him wonder if he'd be like his mother was over Tom Barkley. Would he ever be able to move on from loving Audra so deeply? Would he ever want to feel the softness of another woman again? Heath doubted he would.

Heath decided to go through the kitchen. As he expected, Silas had made sure Heath had some supper left for him when he came home. Although Heath didn't feel like eating, he still did knowing it would please Silas. He then washed his own dishes before heading to take a relaxing bath.

After the bath, he still couldn't sleep so he headed to the study. He figured cleaning a few rifles would help him settle down. Heath hated the feeling of jealousy. It was the most common feeling in the world to him. The least common was love for a woman such as he felt for Audra. That was once in a lifetime. He knew it.

He ached from the work he'd put in. He cursed himself for getting so angry that he'd worked his body into exhaustion. Heath spent a lot of time in this room. It was the room in the house Nick had dragged him to on the first night on the ranch. It was the room that his story was told of being Tom Barkley's bastard son. It was even the room in which the family had agreed to let him become a part of them.

Heath glanced up at his father's portrait staring ominously down at him. "Well, don't you feel better knowing that I won't be ruining that girl of yours anymore? I bet you shudder from heaven or quake from h##l knowing what goes on between the son, you didn't want, and the daughter, that wasn't yours but you wanted. Ain't it just a right injustice to us both on that account." Heath shook his head at his ranting. "I don't hate you, father. You didn't know about me. But I sure wish you and mama had let me in on this secret of yours. I'd have met Audra as a child. I'd have grown up as her brother. I'd never have fallen in love and hurt like I am now. I guess without trying, you hurt me more than most."

Heath sighed out as he went to pull out a gun from the rifle stock. He'd clean some guns then go to bed. Maybe it would relax him. He heard the door open expecting to see Victoria up to check on him. Sometimes, she did that. It was a mother thing. He knew that. His own mother did the same. Instead he saw Audra.

Her hair was loose across her shoulders. She didn't have one side slightly pinned as she usually did. Audra's hair wasn't even fixed as usual. Instead it hung in loose tendrils around her beautiful face. There was a slight wave to Audra's hair when it wasn't combed out. Audra wore a white robe made of satin material. Her fingers twisted in the binding rope that held the robe together.

"Where have you been, Heath?" Audra asked lightly. Heath couldn't help but swallow due to his desire for the woman before him. He noticed her face was flushed a pink color.

"Working some fence line." Heath answered as he placed the gun back in the gun cabinet.

Audra noted Heath wore his tight fitting undershirt. She couldn't help but appreciating his defined muscles rippled beneath it. "I missed you."

"At dinner?" Somehow Heath had managed to make his way towards her. He knew she was no longer his. But he wanted to touch her all the same. He allowed his hand to caress her cheek.

"No." Audra looked up from staring at Heath's well developed muscles to meet his eyes. "I mean.." She swallowed nervously. "I missed you." She paused again to lick her lips. "I missed us."

Heath moved closer until his body was pressing Audra's body against the closed doors of the study. "Did you wear this for me?"

His fingers slid across the satin of her robe causing Audra's body to heat up at his seductive touch. She held her breath slightly before allowing a slight whisper from her lips. "No. I wore what is underneath for you."

Heath quirked his lopsided smile as he took the belt of Audra's robe and untied it. He pushed the robe aside revealing the tight silk corset beneath over small panties that she was even embarrassed to put on. However, she did for him. He watched as she bit her lip waiting for his response. Then he glanced down Audra's body. She was surprised by his use of a curse word. It was a harsh word that came out in a low husky sound.

" #%%"

She knew Heath didn't mean it as an insult to her as a lady. Besides, she didn't want to be a lady tonight. She missed Heath's kissing and his body with hers. The word seemed rather perfect for how she wanted him to react.

Audra started to speak due to the thick silence that hung over them. Heath's eyes seemed to drink in her whole body in a thirst Audra had never seen before. It made her nervous but also tremble with anticipation. She stumbled over his name trying to regain her composure. "Heath."

He glanced back up to Audra's eyes. He needed her like he needed the air to breathe. His lips hungrily found her lips. Heath picked up Audra's body pressing her hard against the wooden doors. He swirled his hips into her causing the friction they both needed to feel. His tongue played against Audra's lips, which parted easily for him. He had taught the girl well when it came to the art of salacious kissing.

Audra's mind momentarily swam from right to wrong. Wrong winning out easily when she felt Heath's hands caress her over the silk material. But it no longer felt wrong because the marriage was real to her.

Audra was amazed at Heath's strength to hold her at his waist. Her arms wrapped around his neck helping to balance herself. However, Heath unhooked her arms then his other hand pushed both arms above her head as he wrapped his large hand around her wrists joining them in a pose of surrender.

Audra moaned disappointedly when Heath's mouth left hers. However, she was soon groaning when his lips assaulted her neck. She felt dizzy with wanton desire. This was different than the slow lovemaking Heath had shown her before. He wasn't treating her like a porcelain doll that his strong hands could break. He was showing her a new side of his wants for her. A side that both frightened her and exhilarated her.

He let loose of her hands but still continued to balance her body with his one arm. Without warning, Heath picked her up away from the wall and pushed one of her legs around his waist. This alerted Audra to allow the other leg to follow the same direction. Then he moved hurriedly from the wall carrying her body as his mouth once again attacked hers. She heard slight crashing of things hitting the floor. She opened her eyes momentarily to see what it was. It was clear when her back hit wood that Heath had cleared the desk with his free hand.

Heath stopped kissing Audra long enough to pick his body up from hers. Audra panicked slightly thinking that he was going to stop. She was soon relieved of that notion when Heath pulled off his long john shirt followed by quickly unbuckling his pants. She shivered at the way his eyes bore into her. She knew the look of lust in her lover's eyes.

Heath leaned over to try to loosen the small strings that held Audra's corset together. She flinched when he cursed again due to the string being bound too tight. Audra had never worn a garment as such before. In her nervousness, she had bound the string in tight knots.

"I'm sorry." Audra whispered thinking she had ruined the intimate excursion with her naivety.

Heath only winked at Audra before he bent over and picked up something from the floor. He bent over her pressing his body slightly into hers.

With a husky voice, he whispered in her ear. "This will just make it more excitin'."

Audra was confused until Heath leaned back only slightly. Then she felt cold metal cross over her throat softly and non threateningly. She knew immediately it was a letter opener that Tom Barkley had purchased years ago. It was the letter opener purchased to open the first check from selling his mine. Ironically, it was his first money to begin building his empire from the selling of his mine in Strawberry.

Audra could tell the letter opener was turned where the sharp edge was away from her skin. However, the cold of the metal still caused goose bumps to raise on her skin as Heath ran it along the contours of her neck. She didn't know how he knew she'd feel so much desire at his ministrations with the letter opener. She didn't care either. When he took the opener on down over the swell of her breasts that stuck out over the top of her corset, Audra instinctively arched her body towards Heath's.

When she thought she could take no more of his teasing with the letter opener, she felt him turn the blade. Her eyes opened quickly when Heath sliced away the barrier of silk string that held together her corset. She heard the clank of the letter opener against the wood of the floor. It had served its purpose.

Audra didn't know how long they kissed or how often Heath allowed his lips to travel over her body before they joined in lovemaking. She knew it was rougher than the past times. She knew the pleasure was more palpable as well. All Audra knew was she felt like she was going to pass out more than once. Both their bodies were wet with sweat as they continued to be as one.

The realization that Tom Barkley's portrait hung above them was lost to them. It was lost to the fact that a father's portrait stared down at a son never claimed and a daughter not his own were in the throws of making love. Audra was usually the one who called out Heath's name. However, she bit her lip to stop her screaming out in pleasure. The taste of the copper blood teased her tongue only mere seconds before Heath was assaulting and tasting her lips again.

The shadows of their bodies caused an erotic dance on the study walls as the flames from the fireplace illuminated against their bare flesh. Heath soon was the one that grunted lowly in Audra's ear. "Audra."

As Heath helped Audra on with her robe, he placed a kiss to the top of her head where sweat dampened hair lay. She played with the back of his neck feeling his damp hair curled slightly against his neck.

"I thought you accepted Scott's proposal. I saw you from the hill." Heath walked Audra to the door.

"Never." Audra grasped Heath's hand. "Is that what this was? Trying to prove I belong to you?"

Heath leaned his forehead against Audra's. " No, Audra. It was to show you that I belong to you."


	54. Chapter 54

**_Chapter 54: A Brother's Confession_**

Nick Barkley had noticed Audra packing a picnic basket as she talked animatedly to Silas. She grinned from ear to ear as she happily chirped out about the surprise for Heath. Silas chuckled as he helped Audra with the food.

It had been almost a month since Audra and Heath had come to an understanding about their relationship and love in the study. They had snuck off every night and sometimes during the day to be together intimately. Today, there wouldn't have to be much sneaking. Jarrod had taken Victoria to San Francisco for early Christmas shopping. Nick had went to town with some hands to grab a drink at Harry's. However, he decided to come back early and see if Heath was done with the chores he claimed he needed to finish. Nick missed the camaraderie he shared with his blonde younger brother.

"Yes. Miss Audra, Heath sure will be happy that you are bringing him a late lunch. Mrs. Barkley was disappointed when you wouldn't go with her to San Francisco for shopping. But I surely know how much you want to spend time with Heath." Silas picked up Audra's prized pickled cucumbers. "Don't forget these."

"Heath loves those." Audra giggled delighted. "He'll be more surprised that I know how to bake him a pie like Hannah does. She gave me the recipe." She glanced at the servant. "Don't act sly, Silas. I know she shared a lot of recipes with you too."

"She sure did. Miss Hannah wanted to make sure her boy got his favorite fixings." Silas chuckled. "Not that I didn't already know some of them."

Nick rolled his eyes and grunted. _Silas was always spoiling that boy_. _When did Audra meet Hannah?_ It didn't matter. If his little sister was thinking that she was going to share that picnic lunch with Heath and not him, she had another thing coming. He'd trail her to wherever Heath was and join them for the late picnic.

Nick waited until Audra was gone at least a half hour before he decided to trail her. He figured as much as she packed, he'd be able to surprise the two and claim his own meal. Nick thought he'd be invited if he was home anyway. Audra was surely feeling sorry for their brother having to finish up some work instead of taking time to go to Stockton with him.

Nick knew exactly where Audra was headed once he followed her path. It was by the lake at the old line shack. There wasn't much to do as far as work there. He supposed Heath was repairing the old place.

As Nick pulled Coco up over the hill to head towards the awaiting picnic, he blinked as he saw the two blondes. Nick blinked again as he held his breath thinking he was seeing things. But it was right there before his very own eyes.

Audra was half dressed as Heath's body lay on top of her. Heath was shirtless as he lay between Audra's thighs. Nick's heart pounded as he stared in disbelief of his blonde brother kissing his blonde sister passionately. Heath's hands were in very inappropriate places as well.

Nick cursed loudly when it dawned on him the reality of the situation. Heath and Audra weren't only kissing, which was bad enough, they were getting ready to do much more than that. The dawning of reality came when Nick saw Heath lean back to unbuckle his pants.

 _I'll kill him. No. He's my brother. I'll just hurt him bad. Well not too bad because he has to work. I'll choke the living daylights out of him. Well not so he can't breathe or anything. But he will feel a hurtin'. Fool boy_!

Nick kicked Coco's sides as he hurriedly headed to the blondes. He was going to kick his little brother's hind parts and then ask questions later.

"What the &^^%!" Nick yelled as he galloped Coco towards his siblings. He knew he better speak up before any more clothing was discarded.

 _What the holy...they're takin' off their clothes! They're getting naked! TOGETHER! As in nude!_

"Oh my!" Audra squealed in horror as she tried to pull her blouse back on.

Heath knew the punch was coming and was grateful he was able to buckle his light colored jeans before Nick sprang off of his horse.

Heath fell backwards as Nick's fist connected. He lay on the ground staring up at his brother. "Hold on, Nick. I can explain."

"Explain!" Nick kicked Heath in the side. _Don't kick the boy too hard. It is my brother after all. Don't bust a rib on him. But the boy needs taught a lesson. You don't kiss or other things with Nick Barkley's sister!_

"How can you explain what I just saw? You were going to ….to….well, you know what you were planning with Audra! OUR SISTER!"

"She's not my sister!" Heath interjected as he struggled to stand from the assault of Nick's boot.

"Stop it, Nick!" Audra yelled as she saw Heath grab his side.

 _Ummm. Hope that wasn't too much. His face looks in pain. But dang he was ... I don't want to think what my little brother had in mind for my little sister. I'm gonna be sick._

Nick didn't hear his sister's words as he pulled Heath up to only punch the man again. Heath blocked the third punch as he stood up the next time. He allowed his own fist to connect with Nick's jawel.

 _Got to give it to the boy. He can pack a wallop. Quit admiring him, Nick Barkley! Got to show the boy what isn't righ_ t!

Fists continued to fly despite Audra's begging. Nick was getting the best of Heath until a small shattered cry caused both brothers to halt the assault on one another.

Audra buckled over holding her waist. She stared at Heath as tears caressed her cheeks. "Heath, help me."

Heath pushed Nick off him as he rushed to Audra's side. He picked her up cradling her body in his arms. "What's wrong, Darlin'? Tell me."

Nick wiped his bloody mouth on the sleeve of his shirt. He stared at his younger brother and younger sister as Audra leaned into Heath still holding her waist.

Heath whistled for Charger to come to him. The horse immediately obeyed his owner as he left his grazing area.

Heath handed Audra over to Nick temporarily. Heath mounted his horse before addressing Nick. "Hand her up here, Nick. I got to get her back to the ranch. Send someone for Dr. Merar." As he took Audra in his arms, he pleaded with Nick. "Please, Nick. Please. Hurry."

Nick nodded as he put away his anger long enough to help his little sister. Nick headed toward Dr. Merar's office as Heath held tightly to Audra getting her back to the ranch. After Heath arrived to the ranch, Heath ordered Ciego to take care of the horse as well as send a man to retrieve Audra's mare. He then carried his bride up the stairs to his room, as it was the closest.

Heath held tightly to Audra as she cried due to the pain in her abdomen. He raked her hair as he held her to his chest. He was perched on the bed beside her.

"I love you, Audra. I love you so much. Please be okay." Heath begged in a whisper as he clutched Audra to him. "I love you more than my life. Don't you ever doubt that."

Audra sniffed as fear began to dwindle at his words. Even though she was in pain, she grasped Heath's hand in hers. "I love you too, Heath."

Nick didn't take long to have Dr. Merar enter the house. Dr. Merar was nearer than they expected due to visiting a neighbor. Therefore, the trip was less time as well. Dr. Merar quickly followed the worried Nick Barkley up the stairs. Nick started to head towards Audra's room but heard Audra and Heath speaking to each other from Heath's bedroom.

He heard their declaration of love to one another. Nick held his breath as he showed the doctor into the room.

"Heath, can you excuse me while I take a look at her?" Dr. Merar opened his bag. "Where's Victoria?"

"Gone to San Francisco with Jarrod. Why?" Nick glanced as Audra still clung to Heath.

"I can help, Doc." Heath spoke up. "If you need help."

Doctor Merar furrowed his eyebrows. "Not sure it would appropriate even for a brother, Heath."

"I'm not her brother." Heath inhaled a large gulp of air. He looked at Nick then stared down at his wife. "I'm Audra's husband."


	55. Chapter 55

**_Chapter 55: Explanations_**

Dr. Merar had been told by Victoria Barkley about Audra's circumstances of birth well over a few months ago. It happened when she had her stroke. The regal lady informed the doctor, without much detail, that Audra had been her twin sister's daughter. The doctor had heard many tales of related people help in rearing family. It wasn't uncommon to do. They both surmised the fact of Audra finding out had burdened Victoria more than she realized. Thus, those facts causing the stroke.

Therefore, when Heath stated he wasn't Audra's brother, Dr. Merar understood. However, when he stated he was her husband, the revelation even shocked Dr. Merar. However, at the proclamation of the young blonde man, Dr. Merar could make an educated guess what was wrong with Audra. It could be one of two things. He hoped for the young couple it wasn't the second. Dr. Merar would have to ask Audra some very personal questions to help him in the diagnosis.

Therefore, he told Heath and a very irate, confused Nick to let him be alone to examine his patient. He didn't need the help he thought he would. Dr. Merar noticed the bruising on both Barkley boys. He wondered with the new revelation if he'd be stitching up them both before this day was over.

After the door closed, Dr. Merar smiled at the young girl laying on the bed. "Is the pain easing now, Audra?"

Audra nodded. "Yes. I don't know what happened. It was sudden."

"Does it burn when you take care of your basic needs?" Dr. Merar listened through his stethoscope to Audra's heart.

Audra blushed brightly. "Some."

"You're running a little fever." Dr. Merar hated when new brides had to be explained some things that come with being new brides. "I guess you and Heath have been celebrating as a married couple a lot."

Audra glanced down at her hands as she entwined her fingers tightly. Her small whisper came out. "Yes. Sir." Her shame evident. "But we're married. The family don't know but Silas. But we are."

"I'm not judging you, Audra. I'm just thinking you probably have been very active in the marriage bed with Heath." Dr. Merar found himself feeling a little embarrassed himself. He'd had to explain things to many a young bride when this happened. But this was sweet little Audra Barkley. "It isn't uncommon to happen to be in pain due to the …." Dr. Merar nervously wiped his hand over his neck. "...nature of being very …..ummmm...close...very….often with your new husband. Sometimes, a female develops an infection."

Audra's head snapped up in shock." We're clean! We always bath first! Well….most of the time. Definitely I bathe after."

"No. Dear." Dr. Merar was thankful Victoria wasn't there to witness this. "It just happens with a couple very fond of one another physically."

"Oh." Audra bit her lip. Again, her face turned a crimson color. "Heath and I are very fond of one another."

"Drink plenty of water. That usually clears it up." Dr. Merar had Audra raise her blouse. "Let me check you out just in case there is something else." Dr. Merar pressed on Audra's abdomen as he watched the young girl flinch. He frowned slightly.. "How long have you and Heath been as a married couple?"

Audra bit her bottom lip. "A couple of months."

He asked Audra another personal question and waited for her answer. "Well, that can explain more of the pain."

Downstairs Nick was pacing as he glanced at his blond brother. If Heath didn't know better, he'd swear Nick's nostrils were flaring and smoke was coming out of his ears.

"How did this thing happen between you two?" Nick finally stopped as he stared menacingly at his younger brother, who was nervously leaning on the stair banister." For God's sake, Heath. She's our sister."

"Not mine. She's not my sister." Heath repeated his words during the fight. "She's no Barkley."

"Now, wait a minute, boy." Nick slammed his fist in the palm of his other hand. "She's a Barkley."

"Not in blood, Nick." Heath swallowed. He hated seeing his older brother angry with him. Nick was his best friend, brother and so much more. "I haven't lived with her all my life, Nick. I've not had her as a little sister like the rest of ya."

"Well, we haven't had you as a brother either, Heath. But sure as shootin', you're my brother and I feel it here!" Nick pounded his fist against his chest where his heart lie beneath. "Don't you feel the same?"

"About you and the rest of the family. Sure as anything." Heath closed his eyes trying to think of the best explanation. "I guess I never tried too hard to think about it with Audra. I was attracted to her the first time I met her. But that was put back in my mind because she was supposed to be my sister. I suppose I never looked at her like a woman after that until…"

"Until when!" Nick bellowed loudly.

"The trip to the Cartwrights. We were both vulnerable, I reckon. Both feeling doubts about our lives and where we stood with family and all." Heath saw Nick's jaw tighten at the words.

"I was hard on you at first." Nick tried to explain. "I thought that was over with. The doubt about where you stand in this family should be over. You're my little brother."

"I know that, Nick. That's not what I mean. I mean confusion of what the #$$# our parents were thinking when they lied to us both. Both our mamas kept us from our fathers, Nick. Neither one of us knew what to think. I'll never know what Tom Barkley would feel about me. Love. Shame." Heath held up his hand to stop Nick's tirade that was sure to come. "Don't matter what folks say he would have thought. NO proof from a dead man. On top of that, all this happening made me doubt my mama. Made me feel second best to Tom Barkley's memory she had. Then Audra was facing doubts of near the same thing. Somehow, we kept leaning on each other feeling the fear of it. Somehow, during that time, we let the thoughts of not being related by blood in our heads. After that, we started feeling things in our hearts too. Those feelings made things go too far."

"Too far!" Nick stalked over to where Heath stood. Part of him wanted to wring his little brother's neck. The other part wanted to envelope the boy in his arms. "How far is too far?"

"I meant what I said upstairs, Nick." Heath squared back his shoulders. He readied himself for another blow of his brother's fist. "How far do you think a husband and wife go in a relationship?"

"Boy, I ought to hit you." Nick grabbed Heath's shirt by the collar as he pulled back his fist.

"I wish you would, Nick." Heath felt tears brim his eyelids.

Nick let loose of Heath's shirt. He remembered those words over the people he thought were squatters. Nick turned out wrong on that account. Maybe he was on this account too.

Nick backed up as he whispered. "I don't know how to think on this, little brother."

Both set of eyes shot up when Dr. Merar headed downstairs. "Heath, I gave Audra some medicine to help her rest. Why don't you go see her before she falls asleep? She'll explain what is going on."

Heath nodded as he took the stairs two at a time to make it to be with Audra.

Dr. Merar looked at Nick as he shook his head. "I don't know how this family is going to handle this. But I heard what you said to Heath about not knowing what to think." Dr. Merar touched Nick's shoulder. "I'm not sure your mother's health can take this either. According to Audra, the two have been wanting to tell everyone about the marriage. They're not legally married." Dr. Merar glanced up the stairs. "Nick, in their hearts they are. Audra can't take the stress of something happening to Victoria. But like you said, you may not know what to think but something needs to be thought of for Audra and Heath too not just your mother."

"What are you saying, Doc?" Nick's brow furrowed as he watched the doctor shake his head.

The doctor swallowed as he placed his hat on his head. There was no way around it. The couple needed an ally. Dr. Merar was hoping Nick may be the support the blondes needed to lean on.

He took in a deep breath before saying to the dark haired rancher. "Audra is with child." Dr. Merar watched the shock pass over Nick's face before adding the crushing blow. "She may be losing the baby. Your brother and your sister may be losing their child."


	56. Chapter 56

Chapter 56: Big Brother

Heath's breath caught in his lungs as his blonde angel cried harshly after spilling the words to him. He kept seeing her frightened eyes as she declared she was carrying his child. Then the words that came after were even more frightening for them both.

"Dr. Merar says I may be losing the baby." Audra sobbed soaking Heath's shirt. "It may be some type bladder infection or I can be losing our baby."

Heath picked Audra up to crawl under her. He cradled his distraught wife in his lap. The fear of facing the family with a child was nothing compared to the fear of losing a child.

Heath wracked his brain trying to figure out how this could happen. He was careful even with Audra. Then he recalled the night in the study. It wasn't planned and he was caught off guard not expecting Audra to be his. He hadn't taken precautions with her that night to prevent a child. All that didn't matter now. His heart broke thinking of what Audra was enduring. It broke with the thought of losing their baby.

"We'll pray real hard, Audra. We will pray for our child. Did Dr. Merar say how we could help you keep the baby? Is there anything you can do? Can I help ya some way?" Heath asked. "Because I really want our baby to make it."

Audra's fingers entwined in Heath's shirt. "I do too. I want that so bad, Heath." Audra sniffed slightly as she tried to cease her sobbing. "He said I need to have bed rest for a while and drink a lot of water. If I start bleeding then I'm losing our child." Audra repeated her thoughts to Heath. "I have to drink plenty of water and he said to try some juices too. And no…...being together for a couple of weeks." Audra blushed despite her worry for the baby. "He is hoping it is only where we've been together a lot has caused a bladder infection of some kind."

Heath felt the heat rise from his neck up to his ears. He never thought of something happening to his bride due to their overzealousness of being together lately.

He kissed the crown of Audra's head. "I reckon we can do that. We got to make Jarrod understand that we need to make this legal. It ain't only us now."

"Dr. Merar is worried what it may do to Mother." Audra began to sob again. "Oh Heath, I can't live with myself if something were to happen to her. But I want this baby so much."

"What do you want me to do, Audra?" Heath whispered. He felt like his heart was constricting with every tear that seeped from Audra's eyes. "I'll do whatever you want."

"I want to go to the Cartwrights." Audra admitted. "To live for a while. I want to not worry over anything but this baby and us."

"Okay. We'll head to Nevada as soon as Dr. Merar gives us the go." Heath cradled Audra to him.

"You'd give up the ranch? Because I don't know if I want to come back here if the family doesn't accept us, Heath." Audra admitted through tear filled eyes.

"Yeah. I would." Heath rubbed Audra's back as he spoke.

The medicine Dr. Merar gave to Audra was finally working as she slipped into a deep sleep. Heath kissed Audra's forehead before he pushed out from under her to allow her to rest. He needed to think. He was exhausted with worry for the woman he loved. Heath was also feeling more pain than he expected of learning Audra was carrying hlis child, who may not live for them to get to know.

Heath walked slowly to the stables after asking Silas to keep an eye on Audra. He asked his dear friend to send for him if Audra woke up.

Nick watched his younger brother head out towards the stable. Deciding to follow his brother, knowing they needed to talk. Nick watched as Heath almost collapsed as his knees buckled. Heath thought for sure he was going to hit the ground before he felt two strong arms pull him up. Heath glanced up to see Nick's hazel eyes staring down at him as Heath was sat on a couple bales of hay.

"Take it easy, little brother." Nick left to only come back quickly with a metal cup full of fresh water. "Here. Drink this."

Heath nodded as he sipped the cold water. He glanced up into his brother's hazel eyes. Nick was caught off guard by the painful look in the azure orbs staring back at him.

"I'm sorry, Nick. I made a mess of things. But I didn't know how to quit loving her once I let my heart open to the love." Heath could feel his throat constrict with unshed tears. "I didn't mean to betray none of ya'll. Not Mother, not Jarrod, but especially not you, Nick. I was selfish. I know that." Then as if a dam broke, tears spilled over Heath's eyelashes down his cheeks. "I don't want my baby to die, Nick."

Nick was caught off guard. He had never seen his little brother cry. Jarrod had told of how heart breaking it was to see Heath shed tears over Liberty's death. Nick knew this was much more emotion pouring from his little brother. Libby's death was about a loss of the past. The baby's death would mean a loss of future.

Nick put away the doubts and anger over Heath and Audra as he remembered Dr. Merar's words of showing the couple support. Nick couldn't deny the relationship of Heath and Audra caused an uneasy feeling inside him. It didn't seem right. It seemed kind of strange to say the least. Those thoughts didn't stop him from loving his little brother enough to help him when he was in pain.

"You don't know if she will lose the baby." Nick grabbed Heath's shoulder and squeezed. "We just need to have faith that God will work it out. How's Audra?"

"Sleepin'. Doc gave her something. She's real upset. Finding out you're having a baby then maybe losing it all in one day is hard to take." Heath ran his hands down his jeans nervously. "She wants to go live with the Cartwrights awhile. She thinks it will be easier to deal with things. If she loses the baby or if it lives, she still wants to be away from from here. We want to live free from worry and judgment for how we feel about each other."

"NO!" Nick jumped back and began to pace. "Your place is here with me on this ranch! Ben Cartwright has three sons for his ranch. Your place is on the Barkley ranch with me!"

Heath's eyes brightened with Nick's words. Heath looked up at the man that meant so much to him. "Big Brother, I hope we can make it work. I truly do. But I got to worry about my wife and child now. Jarrod knows how we feel. We tried talking him into making Audra a Cartwright legally so we could marry. It seems our lawyer brother thinks we're acting ridiculous and nothing more." Heath added quietly. "Jarrod doesn't know how intense Audra and my relationship is."

Ignoring the connotations of that statement,Nick admitted. "I still don't get this whole thing. But I love you both. I'll do what I can to help you. Dr. Merar said we need to keep an eye on Audra. She needs to be in bed a while. You can stay with her. I'll take care of the ranch."

"I can do my part as best I can and still take care of Audra. Nick, how are we going to tell Mother? No matter what, Audra needs her mother now if she loses our child or if it lives. She'll need Mother by her side." Heath rubbed his hands over his jeans again. He could feel his breathing pick up into shattered pants.

"Heath, calm down." Nick was back to standing in front of Heath. "Breathe easier, Heath. You're getting too upset. Easy, now. No use you gettin' sick on us too." Nick ran his fingers lightly through his brother's blonde hair. "I'll talk to Jarrod. If he doesn't help you out, I'll use my fists. I've been known to hit brothers hoping to get my way. As far as mother, we'll talk to Dr. Merar about that. And Heath…"

Heath glanced up as he wiped the tears from his cheek. "Yeah…"

"I'll be here to support you and Audra no matter how uncomfortable it makes me. I love you both, little brother." Nick wrapped his arms around Heath's broad shoulders pulling him into bear hug.

Heath relaxed into Nick's embrace. "Thanks, Nick."


	57. Chapter 57

**_Chapter 57:Decisions_**

Howard Merar rubbed his hand down his face before peering at Nick and Heath Barkley. "I'm not sure, boys. The thing that set of her stroke was the kiss according to you, Heath. Not to mention, Victoria fears losing Audra due to the details of her birth. Maybe you should just let her know about the baby but not about who the father is."

"No." Audra had walked into the room unexpectedly. She made her way to sit beside Heath. Heath grasped her hand in his supporting Audra in her decision. "I'll not hide with Heath anymore. We will find a way to be legally husband and wife with or without the support of this family."

"Audra, you shouldn't be out of bed, Darlin." Heath lovingly chastised his wife. Then he added for the benefit for the others in the room. "I'm with her, Doc. This hiding is too much for Audra. You said yourself that a number of things could have been the factor in her pain. The baby is safe for now but you said yourself it could be stress as well as anything else."

Heath slid his arm around Audra's shoulder. He could see the unease of Nick's features of the small intimate gesture. He had to give it his older brother, the man was trying his best to support them. However, Heath could still see the uncomfort it was causing Nick. How much worse would it be for the rest of the family?

"Mother will be here tonight." Nick stood up and began his usual pacing. "What is the decision? Do we tell her? Or is it too dangerous? I think she's a might stronger than you think."

"I'm not willing to gamble on that, Nick." Dr. Merar stated. "Victoria needs to remember on her own then the shock may be over and all will be fine."

"I'm not putting my wife or child in danger for Mother." Heath stated and added just as quickly. "I won't put Mother in danger either. Audra is right. We need to head to the Cartwrights. We can tell Mother that Audra wants to visit a while. In the meantime, Doc, you can tell us when Mother is strong enough to take this news. Nick, you can tell Jarrod to get the papers legal. With or without him, Audra and I will have a legal marriage."

"I think that is for the best." Dr. Merar hated alienating Heath and Audra from the family.

In other circumstances, he would swear that Victoria Barkley was strong enough to take the news. But with Victoria admitting she was stressed over Audra's birth and Heath and Audra admitting that the kiss may have been the catalyst to cause the stroke, the good doctor didn't want to risk the health of any of his patients.

The events of the next few days proved strenuous on all involved. Jarrod finally admitted the papers had been drawn up to make Audra a Cartwright legally after Maria Montero and Scott Breckenridge had came back to town. Luckily, the two left as quickly as they came. He also admitted that he would convince his mother to sign but not tell her why. He, too, wasn't taking the chance on his mother's health.

Audra, Heath, and Nick left out the news of the baby. Audra didn't feel it was time to tell before they knew the baby was going to be fine. Heath knew Audra needed her mother's comfort but Audra insisted to let it lie for now. What none expected was the confrontation of Audra leaving again to the Cartwrights. Victoria vehemently protested. Audra pleaded her case to her mother but Victoria held fast. It all came to a head they day Heath loaded the surrey to head out.

"This is ridiculous." Victoria crossed her arms over her chest angrily. "Winter is upon is. You can wait until Summer. I can go with you, Audra."

"I have to go, Mother." Audra grasped Victoria's hand tightly. "I love you. This has nothing to do with you as a mother. I need this for me."

Nick was angry at the whole situation. He was losing his little brother even if Heath claimed it was for a small amount of time. Nick feared it would be longer. Nick had always thought someday that Audra may leave the fold when she married. He knew that Eugene preferred the country back East. Jarrod would eventually settle down on the ranch in another home or in San Francisco. Nick figured Heath and he would raise their families together in the big ranch house. Nick always had it in his mind that rooms could be built on if need be. Nick didn't want to lose Heath for even one day now that he found him.

Heath kept loading things as his family brood around him. Victoria was the one to stop Heath's actions momentarily.

"Don't load anymore, Heath." Victoria grasp his arm. "This is not going to happen. I will not have my family disrupted by Audra's going off to the Cartwrights when winter is coming upon us. You will unpack these things at once. This is not a well thought out decision."

Heath shrugged Victoria's hand off gently before placing another piece of luggage on the surrey.

"Heath, I am not used to saying it twice." Victoria's brow creased as she spoke in a demanding tone.

Jarrod and Nick, along with Victoria, were shocked with Heath's answer. "No, Ma'am. I guess you're not. But know this, Audra comes first. We're leaving. That's something that you need to come to terms with."

Victoria nodded when she realized Heath wasn't relinquishing to her demands. Audra embraced Victoria again as she kissed her cheek. Both shared I love yous. Jarrod handed Heath the envelope with the papers needed for Ben to sign. Jarrod whispered to Heath to mail them back or bring them back and Victoria would sign her part. Jarrod preferred the second scenario.

Nick embraced Heath in a bear hug. "I'm gonna miss ya, boy."

"Me too, Nick." Heath weakly smiled lopsidedly.

Heath headed to Victoria. He whispered to her. "I'm sorry. I love you." He kissed Victoria's cheek last before helping Audra up in the surrey.

As Heath snapped the reins, the family watched them leave. Victoria grabbed her cheek as tears streamed down her face.

"Mother, they'll be back." Jarrod placed his arm around his mother's waist. "Audra is confused and wants to get to know Ben. It is going to be fine."

"It's not that, Jarrod." Victoria glanced up at her oldest son. "Heath didn't call me mother. He called me Ma'am."


	58. Chapter 58

**_Chapter 58: Realization_**

Victoria stared at Silas as he held her hands in his. His brown eyes soothingly bore into her hazel/gray eyes. His voice came out in a whisper of strength. "There are truths that need explored, Mrs. Barkley. Truths you have buried in you." His hands cupped her shaking hands. "You need to look. You need to look so another Barkley child can have his or her name. The Barkley birthright."

Victoria felt her whole body tremble. She didn't understand what Silas meant by his words. Yet she knew not to ask because he wanted her to figure it out on her own. "From the day of my stroke. You want me to remember from the day of my stroke."

"Yes. But Mrs. Barkley, there is more to remember. I think the stroke reminded you of something long ago. Something your mind wouldn't let you face. That old satchel of Ms. Rose's held truths alright." Silas smiled kindly. "But your mind held the real truth that your heart won't let you face."

"What if I can't find the answers, Silas?" Victoria's voice cracked with straining of keeping tears at bay. Victoria stood pulling her hands from Silas's grasp. Her skirts swished in the silence of the room. "What if I'm not strong enough for the answers?"

Silas stood slowly. He felt old lately. No. Old wasn't the correct word for how he felt. He felt tired. He was exhausted at keeping secrets. He was sure Rose had felt the same. Silas walked up to stand behind Victoria.

He touched her shoulder as he whispered again in a voice of comfort. "Old Ms. Rose loved you as much as any sister. But she loved Mr. Tom Barkley as her own child. What would a mother do to protect a child as well as a sister? Those answers can be found in you, Mrs. Barkley. I don't even have them answers. I only know what I believe to be true. I only know that I can't speak of things with certainty so I'll not tell things I've put in my own mind over these years. Only you can know the truth of it. Maybe that old satchel sitting in your room has something that will help you remember what needs to be. As far as you being strong enough, I think you are the strongest woman I know. But even the strong have flaws. Maybe you should face yours and quit torturing yourself because of them.."

With those words, Silas walked from the room leaving Victoria to her own memories even if the memories may be haunting ones. Victoria closed her eyes as her head began to throb. She felt her body weaken with fear. However, for her children, she would face her own humanity. For her son and for her daughter, Victoria would try to remember the past that Silas claimed needed to be remembered.

Soon, Victoria found herself rummaging through the old satchel. Eugene had shown up two days prior at the request of Jarrod. He had hoped his mother having her youngest son home would take her mind off of Audra's and Heath's departure. Eugene had arrived back in the states two weeks prior and had taken residence in Rose's old home. He brought the satchel with him to visit his family.

Victoria found a note written on the day Rose had passed away. It was a simple note saying the satchel belonged to Victoria Barkley. But there was a few more words written in Rose's neat penmanship with that note. Something that caused Victoria's brow to crease. A few words that told her Silas was right. There was something only Victoria knew.

 ** _Victoria, look inside yourself. For there lies the answers._**

Victoria continued to search through Rose's old satchel. She found no more hints of the past. Looking at the entry of the journal on the day of Audra's birth, Victoria read the simple entry. No clues were there. Then she continued to read a few more entries. They were in great detail of Rose's life. Rose wrote such vivid detail to entries that Victoria could picture each event in her mind. She read when Rose met Heath only a few days earlier than Audra's birth. That entry caused Victoria to smile as Rose's description of the beautiful three year old boy jumped off the pages. Then it dawned on Victoria, the only entry lacking detail was the one on Audra's birth. Was that the clue that she needed?

Victoria clasp the leather bound journal to her heart. Victoria closed her eyes trying to think. Nothing was coming. She placed the journal back in the satchel before heading downstairs to be with her sons before dinner. The parlor was eerily quiet. Even though her three sons and herself were there, none were speaking. Nick wasn't his usual boisterous self in the weeks that Heath and Audra had left. She knew he was mourning the absence of Heath. Jarrod was quiet since the day they left. He seemed to be blaming himself for something. Eugene looked on worriedly at them all. As if he held a clue to what was torturing them.

The foreboding silence continued as they ate dinner. Victoria glanced at each of her sons. Again, their moods were the same as in the parlor. She bit her lip trying to think. She would not have her family tore apart.

Then with a sudden bravado, her small fist struck the table hard enough to make the dinnerware clatter. "I will not be treated like an invalid! I want to know why my son and my daughter left this place! I want to know why suddenly Heath couldn't call me mother! I want to know the truth of it." Victoria's voice rose in an anger not directed at her sons but at herself. "I will not have this family tore apart!"

Those words crashed around her as she spoke them. Saying them out loud caused the thoughts to pour on her as if a storm cloud had opened up. She felt tears sting her eyes as she stared at her sons, who sat with wide eyes shocked at her outburst.

"I saw them kiss." Victoria's voice cracked as she whispered the words. "Oh dear Lord, I saw Heath and Audra in a passionate kiss. A kiss meant for lovers! What have I done!"

"Mother, you did nothing wrong. They did." Eugene was the first to react. He was nearest to her so he was the one to first take her hand.

"They didn't do wrong!" Nick's voice bellowed. "They fell in love! They belong back here. Married legally. That baby needs to born on Barkley land and carry the Barkley name!"

"Baby?" Victoria, Eugene, and Jarrod all gasped out the word.

Nick rubbed his neck. "Guess I didn't mean for that to come out. But yes, they are having a baby. Now, Mother, don't get upset."

Victoria placed her hands over her face and sobbed.

Jarrod accusing chastised Nick. "Congratulations, Nick. You're not thinking before talking has once again caused chaos."

"No. The chaos is in the fact my baby brother needs us right now." Nick tossed down his napkin angrily.

"Baby brother!?" Eugene shook his head in disgust. "What about our little sister? She carrying the bastard's child!"

"That is enough!" Victoria's tears abated at Eugene's words. "I will not have your brother, the son of my heart, to be called such a vile name. Heath is no more responsible for his birth than…" Victoria's hand cupped her mouth.

She inhaled deeply as she stared at her sons before speaking again. "Nicholas, go buy tickets for Nevada on the earliest train going there. Jarrod, you know more about this. Tell me."

Jarrod swallowed hesitantly. Victoria added. "I'm not used to repeating myself."

"Audra and Heath came to me wanting to be married. Both were willing to change their name to make it legal. I'd not face you with the stress of it." Jarrod admitted solemnly. "I thought I was doing what was best. I thought it was only their vulnerability not true love."

"Well, that's a fine how you do." Nick burst out. "You are wrong there, Councelor. Heath loves her! More than life!"

"Nicholas, go get those tickets. You can go with me as you seem to support them." Victoria grabbed Nick's arm as he turned. "And you're right. Heath loves her. Audra loves him as well. I saw it in the kiss that day."

Nick shook his head as he rushed out the front door. Victoria addressed the two remaining sons. "You both did what you thought was best. But we all make mistakes. Some mistakes make us human. It is how we handle those mistakes that can cause harm. I've harmed those beautiful children of mine far too long with my denial. They need to come home…." Victoria sighed as she thought only to herself. "Audra and Heath need the real truth as do I."


	59. Chapter 59

**Note-I apologize for the length of this chapter. However, I didn't want to split it up. There is only the epilogue left after this one. I appreciate the support to this twisted tale. Also a special thanks to TPS, who has given me help in some plot problems I encountered.**

 ** _Chapter 58: The Last Truth Revealed_**

Victoria Barkley leaned her aching head against the coldness of the window glass. She had rested fitfully the long ride towards Carson City. Her thoughts on the knowledge she hadn't faced in twenty years. The knowledge bombarding her with a fear that gripped her heart so tightly, she thought she may not be able to breathe.

Would Heath easily forgive her for the knowledge she held in? Was she to blame for that knowledge that had remained hidden so deeply in the recesses of her mind and heart? The biggest question was would she have told Tom Barkley, her beloved husband, the secret she knew if her heart hadn't placed it away to be kept hidden until now? And what about Eugene? Could she even tell him and cause the bitterness to entangle his heart even more?

Silas was right. Rose adored Tom and Jim more like sons than brothers. It was easy considering Rose had helped raise the much younger brothers due to their mother's illness. Rose had aided in stealing the memory from Victoria for Tom. To protect him as a mother would protect her. As Victoria had protected Audra with the knowledge she was not hers and Tom's but Lillian's and Ben's.

Victoria didn't know when she had fallen asleep. However, she had come out of her slumber when she felt Nick shaking her arm.

"We're here, Mother." Nick helped Victoria up from her sitting position.

They had road in the Barkley private railcar but Victoria had chosen to watch out the window as they drew nearer to Carson City.

"Are they here?" Victoria asked hopefully as she stepped onto the platform.

"Ben and Joe are." Nick encircled his mother's waist with his long arm. He was disappointed not to see his brother and sister waiting.

Ben made his way towards Victoria. "Joe help retrieve the luggage." He saw the look of worry etched on the Barkleys' faces. "Don't be disappointed. Audra is making a dinner for a welcoming present. Heath was in the middle of breaking an ornery horse."

"You tell us not to be disappointed then tell us Audra is making dinner." Nick joked. "That isn't going to help with the disappointment."

"I think you'll be pleasantly surprised how much my daughter's cooking skills have improved since arriving here. She has to do something to get rid of the boredom while Heath is out on the range." Ben laughed at Nick's joking.

"Little sister doesn't get to do much thanks to that overprotective husband of hers." Joe added as he handed a piece of luggage to Nick to load in the surrey that awaited. "That boy treats her like she is breakable. Audra wants to learn about the local orphanage but Heath insists she stay close to the house."

Nick and Victoria both noticed how easily the marriage was accepted by the Cartwrights. That caused a too familiar ache in both their hearts.

"She's starting to fill out with the baby." Ben smiled trying to explain away Heath's actions.

"Already?" Victoria furrowed her eyebrows. "She can't be that far along."

"No. But she's getting a small stomach already. But don't tell her that. She bought took of Hoss's head when he said it." Joe laughed as he thought of how frightened his huge brother acted when Audra threatened Hoss's life. "Heath just threw up his hands in surrender when Hoss looked for him for help."

Victoria chuckled thinking of how Audra could be when she had a full head of steam. She could only imagine her carrying a child. Victoria's throat constricted when she thought of the child being Heath's. It still hurt knowing that both children of her heart had became involved romantically. It wasn't something she wished to ever happen. It wasn't easy to think about.

When they arrived at the Ponderosa, Heath was standing there to help Victoria down. His words came out in his soft drawl. "Let me help you, Ma'am."

Victoria wanted to chastise him about his use of the word Ma'am. However, she realized she had no right after she revealed the truth to him. Nick had made haste to embrace Heath in a bear hug while picking him up a couple inches from the ground. Heath returned the embrace with equal fervor.

Victoria gasped when she saw Audra walk out to greet them. Just as Ben and Joe had said, Audra had a small pooch forming on her thin body. Victoria's heart beat rapidly in her chest as the baby became real to her.

"Mother." Audra's eyes filled with tears as she made her way to Victoria's awaiting arms.

Dinner was ate in strained silence from the blondes. Heath seemed like the Heath who had first come to the Barkley ranch. He ate in silence as he stared down at his plate. He only glanced up once in awhile to check on Audra, who returned his gaze adoringly. Audra didn't know how to react to her mother knowing she was with child and that child belonged to Heath.

Ben kept most of the conversation going as he bragged on Heath's bringing a better bloodline of horses to the Ponderosa. There was a pride in Ben's voice about his new son in law that all in the room detected. Nick fought to keep his mouth from blurting out that the Cartwrights were not going to steal his little brother away from them. Heath belonged on the Barkley ranch. Fortunately, Nick kept his mouth quiet on the subject.

After dinner, Victoria asked to speak to Heath and Audra in private. The blondes knew the lecture was coming. Heath figured Mrs. Barkley was about to tell him how selfish he was being. He was prepared to tell her he agreed. However, he loved Audra and that was that.

Ben told them to take his office for privacy. He asked Nick to come look at the horses Heath had brought in for breeding. The tall rancher reluctantly agreed. Nick wanted to protect his brother and sister from any more pain. He wanted to protect his mother from the same.

Victoria drew in a large gulp of air trying to settle her nerves. What she revealed today would change all their lives even more than they were already changed. She had caused too much pain not facing the demons of the past by hiding those secrets in the recesses of her memory. Now was time to face those painful secrets. Now that the hiding place had been revealed the day of the stroke then again the day at dinner.

"Why aren't you calling me 'mother' , Heath?" Victoria began with the suspicion of already knowing why the blonde cowboy chose to forego the title to use with her.

Heath nor Audra expected that to be the start of the conversation. However, it would open the door for the real heart of the matter. Heath felt Audra squeeze his hand in an act of encouragement. Heath rubbed his reddening neck as he tried to think of the words not to hurt the one he felt was very much his own mother. Nor did he want to hurt the woman he loved with everything in him. The woman who was carrying his child inside her womb meant more to him than being able to breathe.

"I'm not worthy of calling you 'mother' now. I betrayed ya just as Tom Barkley betrayed ya all the years ago with my own mama. Loving Audra came at a price of betraying you all. But love her I do. More than anythin' I love this here gal. I've never been happier. I thought when I was accepted as part of ya'll I couldn't be more happy. But I was wrong. Audra put a whole new way of being happy to my life." Heath felt Audra squeeze his hand again. "Don't make it right betraying you the same as Tom Barkley did. But I wouldn't take that back for the world. However, I don't have the right to call you 'mother'. I lost that right when I betrayed the family as I did."

"Oh, Heath. If you betrayed the family, I did as well." Audra pulled Heath's hand to rest on her lap.

"Neither of you betrayed anyone. I know you fell in love due to the comfort for one another. You both were betrayed by the adults in your life. Audra by Rose and me. Heath by Tom, Leah, Rose and me." Victoria's voice cracked with unshed tears.

"I don't understand." Heath could see the worry etched on Victoria's face.

"It is I not worthy of having the title 'mother' bestowed upon me by you, Heath." Victoria felt a glass of water being placed in her hands by Audra. She nodded her head in thanks before taking a sip. She then proceeded with the story that had been hidden deep in her mind from over twenty years ago.

"I know how it is to need to be comforted in a time of hurt. When I saw you kissing one another, it was a shock. To see two children you think of as your own in a passionate kiss is heart wrenching. However, that isn't what caused the shock. Memories that I placed away even hidden from myself are what bombarded me."

Heath and Audra waiting patiently. They had waited for all of the pain to be put to rest this long. They knew Victoria needed her own timing to tell her tale.

"After you were born Audra, I was grief stricken. I had not only lost my daughter to death but my sister as well. I felt my world was going to fall apart. You being in my arms was all that kept me from going completely insane. Rose was taking care of so much on her own. She had to get Silas to help her ready my little Anna and my sister for burial. I was in no shape mentally or physically. Upon giving birth to Anna, I had lost a lot of blood. Silas had to help. I think he had his suspicions of things because he saw how strangely Rose was acting. According to Rose, I began to talk out of my head." Victoria felt her tears flow down her cheeks. Again she took a drink of water. "She gave me some laudanum to help me relax."

"I woke up in a daze seeing Rose cleaning you up, Audra. I heard her words and I panicked at them." Victoria gulped as sobs wracked her body.

"What is it, Mother?" Audra's arms embraced Victoria tightly. "Please. If you can't do this.."

"No. I have to." Victoria looked at Heath. "Please forgive me, Heath. In my delirium I mentioned a secret that I knew about Tom. I knew he had the affair with your mother. I knew it because I had overheard Tom telling Rose to go check on your mother. Rose didn't know I had awoken from the laudanum induced sleep. She was exhausted as I said and was murmuring to herself. All I know was I could hear the anger and aggravation in her voice as she spoke."

Victoria swallowed trying to be brave enough to face the reality she had hidden so many years ago. "Rose was saying how Tom and I had hurt each other. How she wouldn't let her brother's life be destroyed due to our anger and weaknesses. She mentioned no one ever knowing about the son of Leah's that looked so much like Tom. I faced her in the words but she claimed I was dreaming. I was drugged and had been imagining things. I accepted that fact because I didn't want to tear our family apart. I guess it was easier to accept Rose's words than accept that Tom had an affair that brought about a child. I took more of laudanum that had forced me into the dream rather than reality. I knew about you, Heath. I knew but couldn't face the truth of it. Instead, I chose to hide your existence in the back of my mind and in the deepest part of my heart to protect the pain and hurt of it. What makes matters worse is in my delirium I knew I had spoke of things that caused Rose to panic.

I spoke of the day I found out about the affair almost two years earlier. I had found out my sister was was dying. She had no more than a few years. The doctor had told Ben and me. I went to find comfort in Tom but overheard Rose confronting him about the affair with Leah. Rose was agreeing to go to find out about Leah's life….

Any way, I ran from Tom so angry and hurt. If you noticed, Ben never got too angry over the secret I kept from him over you, Audra. It was because we had our own secret we had dealt with. I found Ben in his grief. He and I fell into each other's arms needing comfort from all the pain of the day. That night we both drank a little too much. Cried a lot more. But we did the unspeakable. We gave into that pain by using carnal needs to drive the pain away momentarily…." Victoria watched the stunned looks on the blondes features.

"You see. The day of the kiss it all came back to me. The affair, the secret of knowing about you….and the fact that Eugene may be Tom's or he may be Ben's."


	60. Chapter 60

**_Epilogue_**

Seven men gathered around the Barkley parlor staring up at the staircase leading to the upper level of the Barkley home. One paced as he pounded his fist into the palm his hand. One sat on the bottom step of the staircase. The other five looked on apprehensively.

Heath stared over at Ben before standing. "Pa, you think they're okay?"

Ben answered his son in law from the chair he was sitting. "Yes, son. I'm sure."

Heath waited a couple more minutes before he started to head up the stairs. He was stopped by a hand on his shoulder. "Where do ya think you're going, boy?"

"Nick, I don't see why I can't be there with her." Heath raked his hand through his unruly blonde hair.

"That's unheard of." Nick threw his hands up on the air.

Ben arched an eyebrow as he watched his son in law become more and more impatient.

"Why? I helped deliver a woman's baby once when I was seventeen." Heath stated like it was an everyday occurrence. "Don't take much doin'. The woman does all the work."

Jarrod chuckled at Nick's rolling of his eyes. He could just see Nick's thoughts of Heath aiding a strange woman in childbirth. ' _Figures, boy. What haven't you done?'_

Eugene stood up and marched over to Heath. "I agree with, Heath. I don't see why a man can't be in the room with his wife when their child is born. I think it would offer her support."

"Don't surprise me none that you agree with him. You and Heath are thicker than thieves." Nick retorted staring at his youngest brother.

"You're one to talk." Eugene snorted out indignantly. Nick and Heath were as close as two brothers could get as well.

Jarrod smiled at the banter between two of his younger siblings. He remembered the time that brought Eugene to be best friends with Heath. It was when they arrived in Nevada to the Ponderosa. Their mother shared some devastating secrets that almost tore the family apart. The Barkleys and Cartwrights stood together as a family and worked their way through it.

Eugene took it hard when he realized that he would never know if his father was the beloved Tom Barkley or the kind hearted Ben Cartwright. He had threw a tantrum or two. Refused to talk to anyone including his brothers until the day of Audra's and Heath's legal wedding. Eugene found Heath in the barn currying the horses as he awaited for the bride to prepare herself. Eugene made his way into the barn to say to Heath the words that started a mending between the family.

"I guess I'm a bastard just like you." Eugene didn't mean the words to come out harshly. He meant them as a peace offering in a strange way.

The next thing he knew he felt a fist upside his jaw. Eugene had landed in a heap on the floor. Heath stood over him staring down. "Don't ever call any of my brothers a bastard."

"I may not be your brother." Eugene retorted.

"You're my brother, Gene. Don't matter who your Pa is. You're my brother." Heath pulled Eugene up into a brotherly embrace before releasing the younger man.

"Well, you didn't accept Audra like that. Why me?" Eugene dusted off his pants as Heath and he headed towards Ben's cabin.

"You're not as pretty as she is." Heath teased with a lopsided grin and wink.

From that day forward, a tight brotherly bond had formed between Heath and Eugene. The past hurts were mending even if it were slow in coming. Ben and his sons didn't mind more additions to the family. The Cartwrights and the Barkleys seemed to forge as one family living in two different places. The marriage between Audra and Heath cemented that family bond.

"What's takin' so long?" Heath and Nick bellowed at the same time.

Ben and Adam had been through the same thing before. They knew the impatience of becoming a father. However, it did seem to be taking longer than with their wives.

Adam's wife had went to visit her family back East. She had taken little Ben with her. It seems Amy, her younger sister, was getting married. Joe Cartwright teased of the irony of the girl marrying a dirt poor missionary worker who as Joe put it, fell from an ugly tree and hit every branch. It seemed Amy had finally put away her childish judgings and fell head over heels in love with the man.

Heath jumped up again from the bottom step he was perched on. "I'm gonna go check."

Before anyone could stop him. Victoria Barkley was standing at the top of the stairs with a huge grin on her face.

"Mother?" Heath took in a deep breath as he looked at her.

Victoria reached her hand towards Heath. "Come on, Heath. Come meet your daughters."

Ben felt himself sway slightly. He watched Heath run up the stairs and disappear. He swallowed as he said. "Did Victoria say daughters?"

It wasn't long before Ben was the next to go up. Audra nodded to the bundles secured in her arms. "Pa, come meet your granddaughters."

After each of the uncles and grandpa were introduced to the most beautiful infant girls, Victoria ran all of them out saying Audra needed her rest. She also told Heath to go get him a bite to eat while she enjoyed a moment alone with her daugher and her new granddaughters.

Heath had said he wanted to name one girl after the two best mothers a man could have. Therefore, the quiet, demure acting daughter was named Leah Victoria Barkley. The other infant girl was loud and fussy. Audra couldn't seem to nurse her enough. Audra knew one name Heath wanted for his child. She chose the other. Audra chose Lillian and Heath put in the name Nicole. Nick puffed out his chest knowing his niece was named after him. He was taken aback with emotion when Heath and Audra requested he be their daughters godfather.

The Barkleys and the Cartwrights were given the special blessings of the beautiful twin girls, Leah Victoria Barkley and Lillian Nicole Barkley.

In the parlor, all the men were enjoying drinks as they talked about the twin girls. Heath stood staring in the fire feeling overwhelmed by happiness.

Eugene spoke up as he glanced at Ben. "Pa, what do you think is the most difficult thing about the birth of a child from a father's point of view?"

Ben was going to say the worry for the child. But he stopped short when Heath spoke without realizing he was talking out loud. "Waitin' six weeks to start practing creatin' another one."

When Heath realized his slip of tongue, his head snapped up to meet the glares of his wife's six brothers and one father aimed directly at him. Heath rubbed his neck nervously.

"I think I'm gonna go check on my wife and our girls." With those words, Heath hurriedly made his way out of the lion's den.

All the men broke out in laughter at Heath's quick and nervous exit.

The house became quiet as the day darkened into night. A peace could be filled throughout the Barkley mansion as the family settled down for bed.

In Heath's and Audra's bedroom, Victoria poured fresh water in the pitcher beside the bed. She added clean linens and a pile of clean towels to the dresser. She stared back momentarily at her son, daughter, and granddaughters. Heath was lovingly watching his wife nurse one daughter while the other daughter slept in his arms. Heath placed his finger under Audra's chin. He pulled her to face him. Victoria watched as Heath kissed Audra with a kiss passionate enough to tell without words his love for his wife. The kiss looked normal now. It wasn't appalling or a cause for her to flinch. It seemed right. The kiss seemed perfect.

Victoria Barkley headed to her room to get some rest. Victoria noticed the satchel sitting beside her bed. She picked up the satchel retrieving the note Rose had left. For the first time, she noticed the small notation on the bottom of the simple note. "All things work out to God's glory."

Victoria smiled at the simple last words from Rose. It was true. Through all the lies and secrets, God had still seen to give them all an abundance of blessings. They all were unworthy but so very thankful.

Victoria ran her hand over the leather worn satchel. She pulled out the journal and began her own entry.

On this day, I welcome my lovely granddaughters into the world. I am so truly blessed…..

Victoria ran her fingers over the entry she had made before shutting the journal and placing it back in the satchel. Some day, the girls would be old enough to want to know how their mother and father fell in love. On that day, Victoria knew she'd pull out the old satchel to share with her granddaughters saying to them.

"It all started with a satchel full of truths."


End file.
